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*reaches underneath table at dinner* *slowly places red maga hat on head*
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Nov 27, 2019 16:26
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| # ¿ Apr 28, 2024 07:41 |
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*pretends to be mentally disabled and eats food with hands just to get out of cleaning up afterwards*
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Nov 27, 2019 16:28
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I reach across the table for the gravy, and an unending stream of Pokemon cards issue forth from my shirt pocket and into the green bean casserole.
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Nov 27, 2019 16:30
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Hits on first cousin while sober. Hits on first cousin harder when drunk. First cousin pepper sprays me.
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Nov 27, 2019 16:31
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Does that Splash Dance thing, but with the searing hot gravy.
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Nov 27, 2019 16:38
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Back when my brother in law was on speaking terms with the family, he'd come over for Thanksgiving and insist on carving the turkey every year. I found out later that he was doing it mainly to try to emasculate me in some way, but I just thought he was being helpful and giving me one less thing to do 
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Nov 27, 2019 16:54
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| # ¿ Apr 28, 2024 07:41 |
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Jay_Zombie posted:I lol'ed at that thought of that dude carving the turkey while never breaking eye contact with you. It was way worse. He'd find a way to slyly take the turkey out of the oven and begin carving it like he was the one who'd just spent hours prepping and cooking. He did this for years. Now, he and his methed out wife live in a trailer up in some remote part of Idaho. He keeps lying to everyone about living in some fancy rental that his company is paying for but: 1. he posts on facebook all the time about living in a trailer 2. he doesn't have a job, and lives off of some meager structured settlement that barely covers his truck payment. I don't care what he does with his life, but his lying is so bad that it's insulting that he thinks we're being fooled by him.
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Nov 27, 2019 17:12
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