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Budzilla
Oct 14, 2007

I do it because I love you.


The best thing I could say is that the movie is functional.

For me the movie could almost be split between scenes with fan service or characters staring at the scenery, the camera or off screen with swelling music. It's nice to drag out characters, sets and poo poo from the original trilogy to keep fan boys happy but it doesn't make riveting viewing.

Things happen of little consequence. Ben dies and Emperor Palpatine is back and is Rey's grandfather. Nothing is surprising, challenging or leaves an impression on the viewer. It feels like a movie made by an AI program.

Also the cut after the desert planet escape was bizarre. You are probably going to see this no matter what I type.

2/5

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Elentor
Dec 14, 2004



Both this movie and TLJ get a 2/5 from me. Same directorial slapfight, entirely different reasons for a low rating. The issues with this movie are so glaring and on-the-nose that it's hard to review it without treading the same grounds as everyone else. Much like the OP said it feels like a movie made by an AI program. I read a similar take from someone else saying that the movie reminded the person of these AIs that make nonsensical animations for Youtube en mass.

People who think Christopher Nolan movies have a "keep you entertained during the watch, but fall apart as soon as you think about how nonsensical they are" will probably see in this movie the ultimate culmination of plot holes and nonsensical plot elements that, somehow, end up stringing one scene to the next.

This movie makes me think of the Prequels in a very specific way. It's interesting to read all the novelizations that came after the prequels because, given a lot of time, effort and energy, people managed to write in-between the lines narratives and better developed plots that fill in the holes and terrible execution. Of course, there's only so much where you can go with them, but reading the final result is amusing even if for the perspective that someone had to solve the puzzle of how to make all of the nonsense we saw coherent. In this case, I keep wondering how would different authors approach this mess. Would they make it very stylized about the internal conflicts from Rey? Would they present the characters from an outsider's perspective like the beginning of ROTS novel? Would there be two chapters dedicated to detail the Star Destroyer invasion and make it more plausible and lengthier, or would we see just a chapter of Leia's internal monologues on how the Force works, and how she is poetically sensing what's happening from afar through the Force.

The contrast between watching this and then the wrap-up of Mandalorian makes me think maybe SW needs less budget

2/5

GenderSelectScreen
Mar 7, 2010


College Slice

After watching The Last Jedi I was right; JJ Abrams was just going to turn the new trilogy into a "Well, actually..." fight between him and Rian Johnson.

Disney lied; Palpatine died

1/5

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