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Nov 12, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!

Taco Defender

(by Esplanade)

It's 2020 and we're still here posting about an obscure art form formerly found in these things called 'newspapers'.

For the unaware, this thread is for sharing newspaper comics no matter how good or bad. You'll take your Holbrooks along with your Wallace the Greats, and you'll like it. Don't think too hard about the comic's quality, . And don't worry if nobody's commenting on your comic - that likely means it's actually good, since 99% of the commentary is about terrible comics. That said, the thread rule is that any comic you post must have been published in a newspaper at some point, or else hosted by Comics Kingdom or GoComics since they're the closest things to actual newspapers we have anymore. There are a few exceptions, mostly stuff that you likely wouldn't find anywhere else, such as thread favorite Nekonaughey.

Highlights and lowlights of last year include the saga of drunken Wilbur in Mary Worth, almost every comic in the thread featuring a pregnancy arc at the same time somehow, the end of Newspaper Spiderman, Funky Winkerbean attempting to do a poigniant CTE/suicide arc but making it all about Les instead of the actual victims, James Allen getting in a twitter slapfight with one of our posters and writing him into his next Mark Trail storyline just to get back at him, NuNancy (sort of) getting its groove back, Sally Forth doing the time warp again, and Dilbert getting so inexcusably bad it actually got booted off the thread.

(by Luxrage)

Old Thread Listing
  1. For Better or for Worse, here we go again
  2. For Better or For Worse II, The Sun May Get in 56kers' Eyes
  3. For Better or For Worse III: Who need this?!?
  4. For Better or For Worse Megathread
  5. The Comic Strip Megathread: Luann's Funky For Better Minimum Security
  6. The Comic Strip Megathread V - Just Another Uneventful Lesbian Road Trip
  7. The Comic Strip Megathread V, Part 3 - Dick and Jane Go to the Goddamn Bank
  8. Comic Strip Megathread V, Part 4: Thalidomide Theater: Day of the Jackelrod
  9. Comic Strip Megathread Part Ten: Infections and Gams... FOR ME! BARB ELS!
  10. Comic Strip Megathread Part 11: drat that's a fine elephant.
  11. Comic Strip Megathread Part XII: Reply All is the best comic in this thread
  12. Comic Strip Megathread XIII: Still can't get over it!
  13. Comic Strip Megathread XIV: Happy After Death 2013!
  14. Comic Strip Megathread XV: So smile, Margo, and move on
  15. Comic Strip Megathread XVI: Winking Throwbacks to Retro Sexism
  16. Comic Strip Megathread XVII: I have a special recipe (cackle-cackle)
  17. Comic Strip Megathread XVIII: Please refrain from erotic speculation about our characters

Places to get poo poo to post
Universal Uclick's GoComics - thanks Elysiume for this guide on how to get to their comics so you can upload them

Transmodiar posted:

Just a heads up - Elysiume's CSS no longer works - if you want to get GoComics images, add this to the style editor of your choice:

.item-comic-link-disabled, .js-item-comic-link, .item-comic-image {
    pointer-events: auto !important;
    cursor: default !important;

King Features Syndicate's Comic's Kingdom
The Houston Chronicle
The Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Darkgate Comic Slurper

(by Hostile V)

Editing Tools
Paint .NET (Windows)
Seashore (OSX)
Pixelr (web)

(by Ghostlight)

Blambot comic fonts
FBofW by Everett False
Jane's World by Haikeeba!
Luannfont by Haikeeba!
Minimum Security by Haikeeba!
Pearls by Haikeeba!
Gamgasm by Haikeeba!

Alternative Google Drive downloads

(By Forktoss)

And now's the time to post your favorite edits of threads gone by, and to introduce your comics for unsuspecting new readers.

Drakyn posted:

I scavenged up some R ubbish edits.

Past Thread Titles
Comic Strip Thread 2020: Weirdly, I just fled...FLED FROM THE BLOOD
Comic Strip Thread 2020: Causes Goat Keen Disappointment And He Cries Bitterly
Comic Strip Thread 2020: Behold My Ceiling Star Body
Comic Strip Thread 2020: we quietly mumble to ourselves "but there was sport now"
Comic Strip Thread 2020: Viva! WEN-TACK
Comic Strip Thread 2020: I'll Never Reveal Anything You Can Use to Hunt Nancy
Comic Strip Thread 2020: Curtis' Dad Has Got It Goin' On
Comic Strip Thread 2020: It's Not a LOL, But I'm Smiling
Comic Strip Thread 2020: Mo Was Pretty Prescient in Being Depressed
Funky Winkerbean Megathread 2020: Lisa Begins
Comic Strip Megathread 2020: It's My Right! To Poop Whenever!
'Funny' Comic Strip Megathread 2020: Les, Miserable
Comic Strip Megathread 2020: Your Dumb Antics Certainly Keep Me In Tears and Stitches
Comic Strip Megathread 2020: Val is Calmly Drowning Him
Comic Strip Megathread 2020: The Urge
Comic Strip Megathread 2020: Yawps and Gasps
Comic Strip Megathread 2020: God I Hope My 90 Year Old Wife Says Yes
Comic Strips 2020: I Wonder If Bugs Bunny Is Able to Get and Maintain an Erection
Comic Strips 2020: Betty Boop Is My IK
Comic Strips 2020: I'm Just a Little Green Onion
Comic Strips 2020: Well, I Got What I Wanted... Some Goon Exercise
Comic Strips 2020: It's Time, Sarge.
Comic Strips 2020: You've Been Playing Tag With a Tiger
Comic Strips 2020: WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT?
Comic Strips 2020: He Was Quick to Spank That Cheek-Meat
Comic Strips 2020: I Didn't Learn Anything From Any of This
Comic Strips 2020: 9 Cheekmeat Lane Containment Zone
Comic Strips 2020: Manga, You Philistines
Comic Strips 2020: Risible and Full of Jokes
Comic Strips 2020: piss off + get your own?
Comic Strips 2020: A Modernistic Guy
Comic Strips 2020: This is one problem you can't threesome your way out of
Comic Strips 2020: Consternation and Hubbub! Astonishment and Wonder!
Comic Strips 2020: What's the Big Jolly?
Comic Strips 2020: The Internet Has CRASHED To Pieces
Comic Strips 2020: yeah Karkat come on. please just suck me off
Comic Strips 2020:But doctor... I don't know how to read!!!
Comic Strips 2020:I love you, too, you gay disaster.
Comic Strips 2020:Unforgivable Worm Thread
Comic Strips 2020: I'm Gay. Let's Dance.
Comic Strips 2020: The Neatest Lil' Biddies in Existence
Comic Strips 2020: I Don't Actually Have Diarrhea, Cybil
Comic Strips 2020: We're Mark Trail's Dads Now
Comic Strips 2020: Red Meets Jack Because I Got No Snake
Comic Strips 2020: Always Go To Sleep Angry! Always!
Comic Strips 2020: Miss Yummy Dummy of 1947
Comic Strips 2020: Move it, Plaidbod.
Comic Strips 2020: A Sensuous Jack Dream
Comic Strips 2020: Dick Dumbunny Shocks the Corn!
Comic Strips 2020: Sumpin Arful

Haifisch fucked around with this message at 23:01 on Dec 15, 2020


Nov 12, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!

Taco Defender

Newspaper Spiderman:

The sad tale of the world's least competent super hero came to an end last year, with the final comic depicted above. I've slowly been posting old strips starting from 1999, and have currently caught up to 2017.

We are currently in the middle of the Rocket Raccoon arc, where Peter's space son is trying to stop Ronan from destroying poo poo.

1978 comics: I started posting 70s Spiderman because why the hell not. I've recently expanded to include 70s Mary Worth and 70s Rex Morgan since it's not any more effort and they can't be more disappointing than the modern versions, probably.
The current 70s MW involves the scandal of cohabiting before marriage.
70s NSM involves Peter being involved with a terrorist's daughter, and also being extremely angry all the time.
I started in the middle of this arc and I'm honestly not sure what's happening in it yet.

Dick Tracy is a comic I mostly post because I keep hoping something, anything will happen. Instead we mostly get storylines that start off with a possibly interesting concept and end with a wet fart, and probably a cameo or two from some other comic because that's all Staton/Curtis know how to do.

Locher Tracy is a throwback to a simpler time. A time when the stories made no loving sense, but in a way that was funny and had actual beginnings and ends to each plotline. It also features tiny arms.

Origins of the Sunday Comics is a Gocomics feature where some brave soul has been curating random old Sunday comics for our enjoyment. Sometimes they post an assortment of comics, sometimes they post one comic for several strips. They're currently doing Dreams of the Rarebit fiend.

Footrot Flats is a charming New Zealand comic about the realities of farm life. It doesn't sugarcoat things, so don't be surprised if you see freshly butchered headless chickens running around or the dog talking about eating a dead sheep.

Mar 8, 2006

I've got my father's great big six-shooter with me 'n' if anybody in this woods wants to start somethin' just let 'em--but they DASSN'T.



(Depressing Box)

(Mad Dr. Cthulhu)

(Doctor rear end in a top hat)

(Sir Lemming)


(a recent one of mine, for a change)

Jan 23, 2004

We're normal now.
We love your family.

Dustin Burn in Hell

Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?

Hello comics friends, I look forward to another year of terrible comics with you

Gloomy Rube
Mar 4, 2008

Maybe this year Dustin will get a job to do something he likes, and his dad will still be angry all the time because it's 'not a real job'

Aug 10, 2010

Luann and Dustin suck poo poo

How Wonderful!
Jul 18, 2006

I only have excellent ideas.

Thank you for throwing up the new thread so promptly. Here's to the year Wilbur finally Gets It Right.

Aug 28, 2009

Dexter didn't much care for the party.

Another new year where I'm sick, another new thread that gets a low effort post introducing some comics

Daddy Daze is a comic about the "weirdness of parenting", starring divorced Dad and his infant son Angus. While the child can only say "ba", dad is perfectly capable of translating to the readers and there's no ambiguity about it.

Take It From the Tinkersons is a slice of family life comic that rarely portrays the women of the house in a sympathetic way and frequently drops story arcs before they get resolved so as to not change the status quo. This is what some paper(s) replaced Cul de Sac with. Rest in peace, Richard Thompson.

Dark Side of the Horse is a Finnish comic about clever wordplay and clever sight gags. It sometimes manages to deliver on that premise. It also has a an inconsistent upload schedule so I may on occasion post a random one from the archives if a strip is late or omitted on any given day.

Viivi & Wagner is no longer posted by me, as the only archive of strips in english that I could find was three years' worth on repeat. For lack of another finnish comic, I'm posting...

Fort Knox. Supposedly it's about a military family who moved to a new town, new base, and new scholl when the strip started in 2009.

Intelligent Life runs M/W/F, and so I post the weekly batch on fridays.

Jul 14, 2002

May 1, 2008


Let's relive the greatest comic story of 2019!

Oct 23, 2007

The Amazing Spider-Man


Andy Capp

Animal Crackers

Oct 23, 2007

The Argyle Sweater

Beetle Bailey



Edge City

Family Circus

Funky Winkerbean

Hägar the Horrible

Herb and Jamaal

Oct 23, 2007


Hi and Lois

Intelligent Life

The Lockhorns

Oct 23, 2007



My Dad is Dracula

The Phantom

Oct 23, 2007

Mark Trail

Mary Worth

Oct 23, 2007


Safe Havens

Take it from the Tinkersons


Shaman Tank Spec
Dec 26, 2003


Have a Fingerpori dump.

(Waterless urinals are a big thing in Finland these days, and they are often advertised with similar signs in pubs/cinemas/where ever they appear)

(In Finland there's a yearly campaign called "Christmas without presents", which seeks to move away from the materialism in Christmas by not buying useless junk, and also efforts to give presents to those who can't afford to buy any for themselves. Amusingly the phrase "Lahjaton joulu" can mean either "Christmas without presents", or "Christmas without talents". So hopefully this gets both meanings across?)

(In Finland every New Year old ladies write to the Letters to the editor section to complain about how the bangs and booms of New Year's Eve rockets bothers their dogs)

Bonus pissed off doge avatars:
White background:


Jun 4, 2011

I'm not a hero...

Hi everyone! Happy New Year! I regularly post scans from the fantastic (imho) Corto Maltese, an adventure comic by one Hugo Pratt, detailing the semi-mystical adventures of the eponymous rogue from 1914 to the mid-to-late 20s. While one could argue that the stories can be exercises in exoticism, I find that there is a hell of a lot of great stories, drawing and characterisation of people from all round the world, and it is well worth your time to give this a shot.

Of course, it is undeniable that my scans are of poor quality. I try to get them to a reasonable quality, but if they are still not up to scratch, and you want to read up on them, then I suggest you do as the very nice and undoubtedly sexy, intelligent and attractive DC Money has done and support the Pratt estate by getting copies of the books yourself, or even ordering them in for your local library; it'd really make a difference.

With that pre-amble out of the way... in today's Corto Maltese! We left our hero in the midst of a skirmish between the home village of his 'friend' Cush with a neighboring people who accuse Cush of kidnapping their head's daughter. What happens next? Rocks fall, everyone nobody dies, or Shamael saves Corto's skin for a sinister purpose, or Shamael is pretty goddamn ancient

Pigsfeet on Rye
Oct 22, 2008

I'm meat on the hoof

Bonus pissed off doge avatars:
White background:


That's a drat fine dog!

Also: excellent thread title to start out the new year
And "Thanks" to everybody that posts strips

ed: And, of course,

Pigsfeet on Rye fucked around with this message at 14:54 on Jan 1, 2020

May 1, 2008


(Surgeon's Tales will return soon'ish. I've been lazy and haven't built a buffer or written a recap)

Nancy by Olivia James was really fresh and good at first, then got really boring, lately it's been a mixed bag. Still better than Gilchrist, obviously.

I started posting classic Nancy in 2017 and they are now doing repeats from that year. I will probably stop posting when we start getting stuff that I've already posted.

Dustin is a lovely boomer comic.

Wow, what a way to a start a new year.

Mandrake is really stupid but hilarious adventure strip. The current story is from 2002

Viivi & Wagner is a popular Finnish comic about a woman who fucks a pig. We ran out of official English translations, so I'm translating and posting the first three months of the comic from 1997. There's rarely an proper joke and IMO these aren't very good, but at least it's pretty unique compared to every other strip in this thread.

Kennel fucked around with this message at 14:54 on Jan 1, 2020

Oct 10, 2012

Everything is Sinister

Bad Machinery follows a group of teenage sleuths as they investigate various (usually paranormal) mysteries in the town of Tackleford.


Happy new year! Bad Machinery resumes - if you've forgotten where we're at, go back to the start of Mildred and Shauna's fishing expedition at the Chamber of Commerce. If you missed any of this year's Christmas special, it's archived on the New Bobbins section of the site.
The quotes underneath are taken from the Bad Machinery website, which often provide additional insights and links back to earlier stories to provide context. In this case it was rather serendipitous.

Edit: And 'Beavers' is the youngest level of Scouting in the UK, in case anyone was wondering.

Also, Perturbed Mildred is great av fodder, IMO.

Yvonmukluk fucked around with this message at 15:06 on Jan 1, 2020

Feb 15, 2005

What, Me Worry?

Kennel posted:

Dustin is a lovely boomer comic.

Wow, what a way to a start a new year.

gently caress you, you fat gently caress go eat another donut and complain about how fat you are

Aug 10, 2010

I'm not one for effortposts, so sorry for the tiny descriptions.

At one point, Pastry of the Year stopped posting modern Garfield because it super sucks, and I've regretted picking it up ever since

Heathcliff rarely attempts to make sense, and it's to its detriment when it does

Ok, Overboard used to be about pirates doing pirate things but now they garden, exercise, and just practice self care while varying degrees of anthropomorphized animals live their lives on their ship.

Here's some past ones compiled by StrixNebulosa:

Also, the guy can't draw animals to save his life, and it's extremely endearing:

Monty does a lot of pop culture and sci-fi stuff in between its pretty suburban setting, and rotates between the two main characters seen here and a third, little, absurdly rich, boy who is probably a sociopath in training. (I have no idea how to describe Monty, holy poo poo)

Oct 28, 2007

"A data unit?
For me?

College Slice

A handful of edits I've made that still make me laugh.

Oct 28, 2007

"A data unit?
For me?

College Slice

Never forget the Cups Saga, the indisputable high point of Dustin's run.

Mar 7, 2013

Creepy little garbage eaters

Yvonmukluk posted:

Bad Machinery follows a group of teenage sleuths as they investigate various (usually paranormal) mysteries in the town of Tackleford.

The quotes underneath are taken from the Bad Machinery website, which often provide additional insights and links back to earlier stories to provide context. In this case it was rather serendipitous.
Also, Perturbed Mildred is great av fodder, IMO.

That panel of Lottie is prime av material too.

And I recommend the linked Christmas story (and its follow up).

Nov 8, 2009

Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Hello, I am here! I fell off the wagon sometimes around December 18 or something, but I'm back and ready for a new year!

Did something of significance happen in:

- Phantom
- Luann
- Holbrook's Hellworld Strips
- Mary Worth

while I wa gone?

Discendo Vox
Mar 21, 2013

When we run out of classic nancy....I want to see Gilchrist

Green Intern
Dec 29, 2008

Loon, Crazy and Laughable

Mikl posted:

Hello, I am here! I fell off the wagon sometimes around December 18 or something, but I'm back and ready for a new year!

Did something of significance happen in:

- Phantom
- Luann
- Holbrook's Hellworld Strips
- Mary Worth

while I wa gone?

Mars got colonized and also was pregnant at some point in holbrookland

Mar 17, 2007

Darthemed posted:

Never forget the Cups Saga, the indisputable high point of Dustin's run.
I'm not sure whether I prefer the medium or the large edits more.

Jun 17, 2000

Booska mask replica...

Ah... the cup saga...

PuddingKnight posted:

Luann and Dustin suck poo poo


Hostile V
May 30, 2013

Solving all of life's problems through enhanced casting of Occam's Razor. Reward yourself with an imaginary chalice.

Mikl posted:

Hello, I am here! I fell off the wagon sometimes around December 18 or something, but I'm back and ready for a new year!

Did something of significance happen in:

- Phantom
- Luann
- Holbrook's Hellworld Strips
- Mary Worth

while I wa gone?
1: not really but then again I skim Phantom.
2: Tiff may be parlaying her fashion sense and business acumen into helping a junk hauler make more money and becoming his partner. Maybe. Also the small child yelled about Santa for a while and everyone else sucks.
3: it's still all bad.
4: Wilbur getting hammered and loving up a double-date so hard he gave Estelle a vivid nightmare about children with boxing gloves for hands beating the poo poo out of each other.

Safety Dance
Sep 10, 2007

Five degrees to starboard!

I'm getting 2020 off to the right start.

someone awful.
Sep 7, 2007

please can we not post the work of a guy who probably sexually abused his assistant or whatever, it's not really that funny

Jun 4, 2011

I'm not a hero...


Green Intern
Dec 29, 2008

Loon, Crazy and Laughable

Safety Dance posted:

I'm getting 2020 off to the right start.

Dooooooo not.

Johnny Walker
Jun 14, 2005

Is he upset about something?

Thanks for reposting the cups saga, I enjoyed reliving that!

Kennel posted:

Let's relive the greatest comic story of 2019!
This was great, but Estelle's dream sequence was also incredible. Mary Worth really hit it out of the park at the end of last year.

F Minus is a gag-a-gay one-panel and is usually good.

Mark Trail is what everyone knows it is. Notably, there was some inadvertent poop-touching on Twitter last year and now the villain appears to be based on our own Vargo.

I kind of like how they're talking like them finding a freaking yeti is inevitable.

Mary Worth is about an old lady who gives advice to people. Currently, Iris here has been morphing into her ex (and longtime regular sad-sack character) Wilbur and is getting fat and going bald and therefore broke up with her much younger rich boyfriend. (I still think she's actually pregnant.)

The Phantom is about a guy who pretends to be a ghost fighting bad guys in the jungle.

Pooch Cafe is about an rear end in a top hat dog and is usually pretty good.

Rex Morgan MD is boring. Nothing happens. Stuff used to happen, now nothing. The last storyline a couple of secondary characters had a baby, which is something that happened but it really had zero tension whatsoever despite being set up as a risky pregnancy. Right now a wacky aunt no one has ever heard of has decided to visit.

Andertoons is a gag-a-day one-panel and is also usually good. It is probably quietly my favorite comic.

Apartment 3-G is a comic about 3 single young women living in NYC. I used to post the current ones but they stopped making them after the artist lost his mind so I post the vintage strips now. We're in 1974, and a misogynistic talk show host who moved into the building has a teenage sister is visiting who is an alcoholic.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 29, 2005

^ " We don't have that." " WHAAAATT?! "

We've had some pretty nasty strips in here, and we've had strips made by nasty people.

But Gilchrist's strip is a nasty one, made by a nasty person and TBH, I find the combo of his art and writing a physically repulsive reaction.

Still, I am not going to say NOT to post it. We've always posted all Comic strips, good or bad, warts and all.

Edit: I have alot of various things that I want to take to the library and have scanned on their large format scanner. Just.....Haven't had the in life to do it.
This thread is the first thing I read over breakfast when I wake up.

Johnny Aztec fucked around with this message at 18:06 on Jan 1, 2020


Professor Wayne
Aug 27, 2008

So, Harvey, what became of the giant penny?

They actually let him keep it.

My Dad is Dracula is about having a dad that sucks.

Pickles is about old people.

Zits is not Dustin.

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