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Aug 22, 2020 06:46
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| # ¿ Apr 26, 2024 19:09 |
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Sitting Here posted:
The WinniSmooth Disaster 2,417 words Raquel beamed at her fellow WinniPride boss babes. She prayed nobody noticed her irritated eyes and furrowed brow from the stage-light brightness. “Welcome to the Winnipeg Pride Beauty Company’s tenth annual conference! Eighteen months ago, the same month WinniSmooth Hair Removal System was first released, I was like one of you Green Levels in the back: broke, surrounded by ‘friends’ and ‘family’ who didn’t believe in me, yet I was determined to overcome my insecurities and become my own boss. Twelve months ago, after I traded in my unsupportive friends for my wonderful mentors, colleagues, and downline at WinniPride I reached Gold Level, earning my maple brown WinniPride Chevy Malibu. Two months ago, after I sold my 100,000th jar of WinniSmooth, I reached Diamond Level, and I’m here to tell you that if I can do it, you can DEFINITELY do it, too! Now give it up to our beautiful and talented CEO, Marla Shephard!” As Raquel exited the stage, Marla pulled her into a hug and whispered, “Meet me at 11 pm in my office suite, 3A.” Raquel’s eyes shone and her brow furrowed again, not because of the lights but because these meetings, even the thought of these meetings, made her want to cry. She was often complimented, true, but usually to make lower-performing Diamond Levels feel like poo poo. Marla constantly reminded Raquel she wasn’t doing enough, that as the number one earner for WinniPride she set the standard for literally thousands of WinniPride CEOs in training. “As our most successful earner you’re only competing against yourself”, Marla would reason. “And that means you need to go above and beyond every single sale to prove to yourself, the Board, and our CEOs in training that you’re worthy of the Number One Diamond Level Boss Babe title. Let yourself down, and you also let thousands of hopeful entrepreneurs down.” When Raquel arrived to Suite 3A, her eyes widened as she counted every member of the board in the crowded conference room. Everyone looked dejected. “Please have a seat and sign these forms”, Marla said breezily, pushing a small stack of papers towards Raquel. “Wha..what are these for?” Raquel asked, trying not to tremble. “Oh, just a standard confidentiality agreement that you’ll keep this meeting secret.” Raquel signed the forms obediently, but couldn’t help noticing phrases such as “felony violation”, and “damages not less than all earnings related to WinniPride, plus an appropriate percentage of existing assets as determined by the WinniPride disciplinary committee”. Forms signed and tucked into a red folder, Marla leaned forward in her chair. “As you know, our WinniSmooth hair removal strips are made with a maple syrup base plus Proteinase-K and a few proprietary modulating polymers. Proteinase-K breaks down the keratin in hair quickly, while the polymers protect the skin and inactivate the proteinase so it doesn’t cause unpleasant side effects. There’s been a development in our test animals, from the first batch who’ve been given WinniSmooth for about twenty months to the third batch, started about eighteen months ago. We were concluding the program so we could move the animals to other products, but after we ceased WinniSmooth treatments for six weeks we observed that some of the animals’ bodies had become…dependent on the WinniSmooth.” “Dependent, like, the rabbits got the shakes for WinniSmooth?”, Raquel awkwardly joked. Marla glared. “No, not the shakes. 28% of the animals treated with WinniSmooth for at least fifteen months were terminated. They absolutely should not have been terminated, we should have kept them alive at any cost for testing. The bleeding heart scientists euthanized them because apparently the screaming became too much to handle. You see, the animals’ skin reached boiling point and more or less melted.” “Ew!”, exclaimed Raquel, wrinkling her nose. “Good thing that can’t happen to people.” Marla sighed, “Our R&D team cut corners testing on human skin cells in the lab. We’ve identified a few suspicious deaths in the last three months, and we believe WinniSmooth or rather, the lack of WinniSmooth, may affect at least some percentage of humans in the same way as the rabbits.” Raquel was speechless for a few moments as she considered the information, and her growing guilt at being with associated with a bunch of melted rabbits, not to mention melted humans. She realized what she had to do as WinniPride’s Number One Diamond Level Boss Babe. “You brought me here to prepare me for tomorrow’s reveal- we’ll be telling thousands of CEOs in training that WinniPride is done for, that this will be WinniPride’s last conference”, she declared. “What?! No!”, Marla yelled, smacking the conference table and rolling her eyes. Raquel flinched. “Think, Raquel. We have to do the opposite of pulling WinniSmooth off the market. We have to make sure that every single customer who’s consistently used WinniSmooth for at least fifteen months continues to do so, and they’ll be just fine. In the meantime, our R&D team is working around the clock for an antidote.” “You expect me to keep shilling this poison? What does the Public Health Agency have to say about all this?”, Raquel cried. Marla pursed her lips. “The PHA doesn’t know, and won’t ever need to know. The unfortunate cases so far have been lucky for us. It seems driving, maybe the vibrations or petroleum fumes, acts as a catalyst. The victims so far appear to have died in unfortunate fiery crashes. Marla paused, smiled warmly at Raquel. “So what we need you to do, as our most valued CEO in training, is help us reach every one of our long term WinniSmooth users, and make sure they continue to use WinniSmooth. The truth is if you fail to make enough sales, if long-term users get bored of our product, you will be partially responsible for some of our customers’ untimely deaths.” Raquel shivered. She began listing her first set of WinniSmooth customers in her head, the ones who signed up eighteen months ago. Her mom, her church group friends had all ordered a jar, even her estranged husband Paul tried it on his bushy chest at Raquel’s begging. How many were still using WinniSmooth consistently? Didn’t she get a text from her pastor that a church member had died in a car accident a couple weeks ago? She’d been out of touch with everyone for months now, ever since she’d committed entirely to WinniPride. Nobody from Raquel’s old life understood her passion, her ambition to succeed like her new WinniPride family, so Raquel had lost touch with them, one by one. Paul left after Raquel charged $40,000 in WinniPride products to her credit card so she could make Diamond Level. Raquel gulped as she realized she herself fit the description of a consistent WinniSmooth user for over fifteen months, using it every other week on her legs. “I don’t want a part in this, I don’t think I can sell WinniPride products anymore”, Raquel said, shaking her head. Marla pulled a different stack of papers out of the red folder. “Raquel, this is the contract you signed with us when you became a Diamond Level Earner two months ago. One of the ways we keep WinniPride Beauty Products safe from litigation is by giving a sole proprietorship to each Diamond Level Earner and granting them permission to sell WinniPride products. It’s all in the fine print, but the gist is that you vouch for the safety of every jar of WinniSmooth and any product you sell, from both a professional and a legal standpoint.” “So, you’re saying I’m legally responsible for people melting?! I’m going to go to jail, ohmygodohmygodohmygod!” Raquel, holding her stomach and rocking back and forth. “No, you won’t, not if you help ensure our long term users continue to use WinniSmooth.”, Marla said, offering Raquel a small trashcan. “Like I said, our R&D team is working non-stop for an antidote. We estimate we’ll have one available within four months. Help us and not only will you save lives, you’ll keep your coveted position at WinniPride. If this goes well, there’s a spot on the executive board with your name on it. What choice did Raquel have? Her whole professional life, social life, even her dreams revolved around WinniPride. Besides, she wasn’t exactly prepared for prison- she couldn’t even handle sharing a tent at the WinniPride glamping retreat earlier that year. “Fine, I’ll do it. For four months, that’s it.” “Oh thank goodness”, Marla smiled. “Together, we’re going to save lives and WinniPride’s good name”. She brought out another stack of papers for Raquel to sign and they discussed sales accounts and strategies until sunrise. *** The next three months, Raquel worked eighteen hours days tracking down old WinniSmooth accounts and made sure they stayed active, whatever her emotional and even financial cost. She lived out of mid-level hotel rooms, and was lucky to get four hours of sleep each night. But sleep could wait, there were lives to save. She felt righteous and even noble as she drove her maple brown WinniPride Chevy Malibu all around southern Manitoba, staying in motels that weren’t always covered by the per diem she received from WinniPride corporate. There were bad times, like when Raquel became too exhausted to drive and had to nap at seedy rest stops, and when Marla called to tell her that based on Raquel’s blood type, heritage, and allergies, she was about 95% likely to suffer deadly consequences if she stopped using WinniSmooth. On their next call, Marla informed Raquel that another WinniSmooth user had suffered the unspeakable side effects Raquel was trying so hard to save everyone from. “You’re doing well, but you just have to try a little harder, a few more sales here and there and maybe nobody else has to die.”, Marla said. “This victim only used WinniSmooth on her lower legs, she almost made it. Keep trying!” “Wait, so it only affects the skin you use WinniSmooth on for at least fifteen months?”, Raquel asked. She assumed the side effects melted the whole skin at once. “Well yes. Don’t worry about the details, keep going! I’m emailing over your itinerary for the next six weeks now,” Marla said. “Six weeks? I thought R&D was going to have an antidote ready in four more weeks!” Raquel cried. “Unfortunately, things have been pushed back at least a year. I’m sorry. We are still SO excited to have you on our board as soon as everything wraps up.” Marla hung up. The next six weeks, Raquel pushed herself to whatever was beyond exhaustion. She didn’t realize how bad she looked until she ran into Paul one day, in a small farming town. “Oh my god, Raquel, are you sick, are you okay?” His reaction to her haggard face, the bags under her eyes made Raquel think about the hell she’d been through in the last few months. “Come over for dinner and rest a few hours. I’m helping out my Uncle, he’s a livestock veterinarian for the local ranches.” Raquel wanted to say no so she could reach a few more accounts that day, but she hadn’t seen a familiar face in far too long, and accepted. Maybe it was seeing Paul or her exhaustion, but after dinner and a few too many glasses of wine, Raquel revealed everything to Paul and his kind old uncle. At first they didn’t believe Raquel, but after showing them emails, texts, and call logs, they couldn’t deny she was telling the truth. “You know what, I just want out. I’m so tired, I’m now up to $80,000 in debt funding WinniSmooth subscriptions for people who are reluctant to pay, I’m liable for WinniSmooth. I’ll have to go to prison, but at least this will be over. Maybe I can tell the Public Health Agency and WinniPride can get some help developing the antidote sooner than a year from now.” “But Raquel”, said Paul, “What about your own reliance on WinniSmooth?” Paul’s uncle scratched his head. “I have a solution for that, if you’re really prepared to change your life as you know it”, said Paul’s uncle. “I’ve seen how sad Paul is these last few months, I see how desperate you are and how much you’ve missed him, too. You clearly need each other. Besides, sometimes people with disabilities can serve their time under house arrest.” Raquel nodded and said, “Yes, whatever it takes.” Paul’s uncle led them to an outbuilding, where he performed livestock surgeries. *** Two days later, Raquel woke up in a sunny and simple hospital room. She felt better rested than she had in months, despite the massive bandages starting a few inches from her hips and ending in gauzy nubs. Marla sat in a chair next to the bed, leaning forward and looking somber. “A farming accident you say? How?”, Marla asked. “I was helping my ex’s uncle clean some old farming equipment and before I knew it- crunch- the blade fell down over both my legs. That’s the last thing I remember.”, said Raquel. That’s the official story anyway, she thought. “Oh, that’s horrible! Here’s a gift from all of us at WinniPride”, Marla said. It was a WinniPride mug and tee shirt. “Oh, uhh, thanks”, said Raquel. “Look, Marla, I decided I want to come clean over the WinniSmooth disaster. I want to involve the Manitoba Public Health Agency, whatever it takes. If I have to go to prison, so be it. I just have so much guilt all the time, it’s killing me. I can’t melt now that I’ve removed the WinniSmooth affected part of my body, and I want to do anything I can to help WinniPride find a cure.” Marla shook her head, looking profoundly disturbed. “Oh Raquel, you can’t do that.” Raquel set her jaw, and said “I have to, Marla. It’s the right thing to do.” “No Raquel. Oh my god. You’ve surpassed all sales projections in the last quarter. You broke records, Raquel! You reached our hardest demographic, those who’ve used and gotten bored of our products. You were such a success that we’ve expanded our program to several more Damond Level Earners. God, Raquel, the WinniSmooth disaster isn’t real, it’s just, it’s just…a sales tactic.” Marla bustled out of the room, and Raquel watched out the window as Marla drove away in her maple brown WinniPride Cadillac, the CEO level WinniPride vehicle that Raquel now knew she would never earn.
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Aug 24, 2020 07:26
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Aug 25, 2020 02:27
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