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Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Casimir Radon posted:

Not even consecutive decades. Bad Boys II was 17 years ago. Way way back when Michael Bay developed an unhealthy obsession with an underage Megan Fox.

The funny thing still is that her character in the Transformers movies is named Michaela Banes.

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Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




FilthyImp posted:

Dude, how do you list all those but leave out the brilliance that is SUBURBAN COMMANDO (originally what Devito and Ahnuld were signed on for before the Twins script happened).

I think it's all attempts to recapture the magic of Arnie without realising he was perfectly good at being a comic actor.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Studios overmanaging and meddling with movies to get ahead of any perceived controversy and to sell merchandise with no regard to coherency or quality is the most believable narrative by far.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




feedmyleg posted:

I'm just always going to be more on board for puppets/animatronics than dudes in costumes. Except, of course, kaiju.


It's not like all the movies weren't spoiled by Legos.

Remember the Mandarin showdown?

For all that Disney desperately wants to monetise Star Wars they're basically doing everything wrong at every opportunity.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




I feel like it should be a good test for a lot of movies that they could work as a silent film.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




bows1 posted:

Stop looking at asinine ratings of movies ? Cinema score is lol awful and rotten tomatoes should only serve as an aggregator of reviews if you want to read then , not as a score of the movie. Your playing yourself

Even the gamers figured this out by now, review scores are the worst.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Making bad things is generally considered to be required practice for making good things.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Avatar made a shitload extra money from the 3D ticket prices iirc.

Should still totally make Avatar vs Predator. Also, reminds me... been said that the first two Predator movies are basically the Predator intruding on what would have been a pretty standard 80s action movie (complete with exactly the appropriate cast) and then an action-packed buddy cop movie that suddenly find themselves having to deal with a superpowered alien. And I think like with the good Terminator movies being basically movies about horror movie monsters, the series loses its way when they lose sight of that. It's interesting to mess with genre conventions and audience expectations, especially when you're basically playing out horror movie cliches but with a cast entirely of burly heavily armed men.

I'm not sure what the modern equivalent would be.

Ghost Leviathan fucked around with this message at 16:38 on Jan 7, 2020

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




MonsieurChoc posted:

Okay, get this, it's Avatar, but Alita shows up halfway through.

Turns out Avatar is set in the future dystopia of Gunnm.

Also the Prawns show up and it's District 9 as well.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




One of these days I'll break into a Hollywood producer's office with some legendary super-cocaine...

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Len posted:

I haven't seen it, just going by what I've read on these forums which was that it was a lovely movie because HER EYES

lol, you made the dumbest possible decision

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




RBA Starblade posted:

Beavis's greatest failure was Batman and Superman fighting each other without first popping their shirts off

Of course they didn't rip from Dragon Ball Z enough.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




The Monster Hunter movie is weird especially since there's technically precedent in the Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker crossover where Big Boss finds a giant paw shaped island where Monster Hunter monsters live (including one monster that's basically an organic version of Metal Gear REX created specifically for that game) and fights them with machine guns and rocket launchers (and they're still among the hardest bosses in the game). And the ultimate gear drop from them is a human slingshot.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Adam Sandler is The Riddler

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Spectre wouldn't be too bad if they clearly hadn't been flailing by around the halfway mark.

I still say they just need Bond to fight a Metal Gear.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




muscles like this! posted:

Spectre has that really confusing part where all of a sudden a computer says that the bad guys were responsible for everything that happened in earlier movies because of DNA on a ring?

If they're going to go all Metal Gear on us they should go all the way. I was thinking they were setting up a Solid Bond/Liquid Bond thing with Bloefeld, though I suppose they already did that in Skyfall.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Transformers has a pretty long tradition of using designs with or without permission, though the cartoon designs tend to be non-specific vehicles or plausibly deniable.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Casimir Radon posted:

If you want to launch a female action franchise maybe stop trying to grab the coattails of dead franchises nobody cares about anymore, and just do your own thing.
See: Charlie's Angels

River City Girls was pretty fun though.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Agent Smith spinoff where he, I dunno, ends up in the Digital World and learns to love Digimon.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




BaldDwarfOnPCP posted:

Pokémon is eggs I guess and digimon is the not eggs. Sad shapeless snotty uneggs.

Hey they specifically have Digi-Eggs. And no, the naming scheme doesn't get any better from there.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:

They couldn't even find a way to shoehorn mon into the name. Sad.

That's for the individual creature names, literally every other term has Digi on the front.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




It's like when you watched Dragon Ball Z back in the day, and the incredibly bombastic narrator would spend five minutes recapping the events of the previous episode at the start, and then describe most of the events of the next episode at the end, so you basically only needed to watch every third episode or so to keep up with things. Next time, on DRAGON! BALL! Z!

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Casimir Radon posted:

Dershowitz has been outright accused of raping girls supplied by Epstein. All those dumbasses you know who won't shut up about how Hillary had Epstein killed don't care in the least that Donnie's personal lawyer is probably a kiddie fiddler. Of course they don't care that Donnie has been accused of all those assaults, and bragged about groping women in what he thought was private.

The CSPAM consensus is that Epstein's assassination was probably a bipartisan operation and Hillary and Trump should be cellmates.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




got any sevens posted:

I wonder how Duckman got away with it

Being only vaguely similar, probably, and during the period Donald Duck was pretty out of focus. Like the only relevant things with him before new Ducktales is maybe Kingdom Hearts.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




GrandpaPants posted:

Perhaps you've heard of The Mighty Ducks???

Oh buddy, have I. (I was a huge fan as a kid and also know it has nothing to do with Donald Duck)

Hell, Donald was only in like two episodes of the original DuckTales. Apparently Disney was worried that kids couldn't understand him and that he'd overshadow the rest of the characters.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




IShallRiseAgain posted:

It doesn't matter if the game story is worth telling or not. The movie is still an adaptation of that game's story, and still has to vaguely resemble it. You get the story the writer and or director wanted to tell awkwardly combined with the story of the original game.

It's not exclusive to video game movies, it's pretty common with bizarrely bad adaptations in general, like how the He-Man movie was more interested in trying to be The New Gods.

The Warcraft movie was a weird case where apparently all the CGI Orcs were actually watchable while the human scenes were awful.

FilthyImp posted:

Double Dragon was crazy.

"Gang steals dude's girlfriend" = "in a Los Angeles ravaged by toxic waste and gang rule, two brothers unlock a mystical medallion and become magic dragon ninjas"

The silly thing is how unnecessary that all is, because you have the inspiration for the game itself right there- a cheesy martial arts movie fighting through tons of minions broken up with memorable bosses, and maybe even culminate with the brothers turning on each other as a twist.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




MechanicalTomPetty posted:

You mean Mortal Kombat, right?

Well, most successful at least. $122.1 million on an $18 million budget. Also while I was looking that up I found out they're working on a new Mortal Kombat film for 2021.

It's filming in my home town, apparently! Still hoping for a Fatality involving the Mall's Balls.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Vandar posted:

If I'm remembering correctly, this is why the Halo movie never happened. Microsoft was wanting a ridiculous amount of control over things and was trying to dictate the exact terms of the movie deal, and they basically got laughed out of Hollywood.

For the best, honestly.

FAKE EDIT: Yeah here's a good article about it: https://www.wired.com/2012/04/halo-movie-generation-xbox/

The story behind it is even more ridiculous than I had remembered it being.

The funny thing is that District 9 ended up being made basically out of the leftover money.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Kind of the other issue with video game movies is that game studios have learned the hard way if you leave Hollywood to their own devices you have no idea what the gently caress they'll do. Nintendo in particular is very leery of movies after the Super Mario Bros debacle, and only recently I heard Illumination is working on a Mario movie at some point. The Sonic movie seems to be a case where they had to get a universal reaction of 'what the gently caress? lol this movie is going to be so poo poo' as a wake up call that maybe they should have actually listened to Sega and used the design notes from a character who remains massively popular despite being in maybe four good games.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Halo does at least have a whole space opera backstory where a war with religious fanatic aliens is mixed in with a Niven ringworld, its robot defenders and off-brand Zerg, and a whole ancient aliens background, but a protagonist who literally never removes his helmet isn't something Hollywood plays well with. (see Judge Dredd)

Rampage is a funny case given it takes major liberties with what passes for the story of the franchise, but keeps the key points and absolutely maintains the spirit of the idea, and as a result is a serviceable B-Movie much like what the original game was clearly meant to evoke.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Baron von Eevl posted:

I know the novels (lol) explained this, but I forget if the games ever explicit state that the demons are actually interdimentional aliens that either psychology mined us for our fears and echoed that or if it was a childhood's end-esque thing where they inspired our demon imagery.

The recent games play it the other way where the evil idiot corporation tapping Hell for energy ends up gradually losing the pretence for being a demon cult sacrificing its employees for power


Babysitter Super Sleuth posted:

There's an entire series of these, actually.



Doom Slayer and Isabelle being friends is a whole genre of art from hopeful Smash Bros fans

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




The Road Not Taken seems to be the most famous Turtledove story probably because it's no longer than it needs to be to get the point across.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Weirdly enough, even if the directors don't clearly completely lose the plot, Mario is probably the easiest property to adapt to film mostly because it's basically perfect for animated adventures in a surreal fantasy world. (Fun note: Mario and Donkey Kong were created because they couldn't get the rights to Popeye)

Zelda is probably second easiest; it's a pretty standard fantasy story where you basically have canon precedent to throw in any particular gimmick you want.

Metroid is basically Alien with power armour and doesn't have much in the way of actual characters, though you might have fun with Ridley. Fire Emblem... similar to Zelda, you could probably take whatever you want from the source material to make a passable fantasy epic, but might have the problem with a poorly supervised director getting some really dumb ideas.

I'm not sure what's considered to be Nintendo's hot properties nowadays, so I'm open to more entertaining arguments.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




The games themselves pretty much already do that, Mario Odyssey has some incredibly indulgent nostalgia trips while also doing new things. Mario's done a bit of everything, you actually have a fair amount of leeway as long as you keep his look right.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Detective No. 27 posted:

Super Mario 3D World did away with that and let Peach be one of the playable characters.

But then they went right back to it in Super Mario Odyssey. At least Peach got a fun vacation in the post game.

They did that as early as SMB2. (and yes, I'm aware it didn't start as a Mario game)

Even the Paper Mario games do some fun stuff with Peach being kidnapped.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Neo Rasa posted:

The tech person's final fight has to be against one of the really basic large insect enemies Samus can kill just by walking into them in the games and he has to use every little improvised trick and thing in the communications room to stop it intercut with Samus' confrontation some massive Mother Brain/whatever the story's final ultimate foe is.


The best Metroid movie would basically be Fata Morgana but with scenes of Samus shooting aliens in between the parts where it shows natural beauty set to Mayan creation myth recitations or Herzog talking about whatever.


Basically play Metroid games they own.

Metroid movie should have the Space Pirates be the viewpoint characters getting their poo poo steadily wrecked by Samus.


Neo Rasa posted:

Plus it has easy sequel potential since each movie can end with him getting busted/losing his money to Wario somehow/whatever and him doing the EVERYBODY'S CHEATIIIIINNNGGG voice over.

The downside is that Robbie Rotten's actor died, because he was basically 80% of the way there.

Also now picturing a WarioWare movie that's a bunch of interlocking stories with an ensemble cast with completely insane action setpieces.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




'Geewunners' are particularly mocked in TF fan circles because while quality has varied wildly over the years, they were generally at least acceptable for the time. G1 has aged like milk. Have you tried to watch an entire episode as an adult?

About the only series that could maybe be worse quality than G1 is maybe Transformers Energon, and that was mostly just boring and obviously low budget.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Beachcomber posted:

Long story short, the director, deliberately or not, framed the Autobots as lying genocidal psychopaths. At least as far as I understand that argument.

Basically while there's more layers of vintage internet irony poisoning involved than I care to count, yeah, and in general the movies are such a tonal and thematic complete mess that they're fun to overthink massively about.

The other Transformers series have their ups and downs but are fun. Beast Wars is one of the earlier cases of actually sneaking an ongoing story with character development and nuance into a toy commercial. (Partly because of the limitations of early CGI; when you can only create so many characters, turns out you might as well give them interesting personalities) Robots In Disguise (the original one) is a goofy anime series that has a lot of variety including the bullet trains, who adopt a non-sentient steam engine as an honorary grandpa, and that poor woman who appears in almost every single episode getting her vacations ruined by collateral damage, zany schemes and/or a confused horny Autobot. And Sky-Byte, who is like Starscream inverted in the very best ways.

The anime/CG trilogy after that is pretty forgettable, while Transformers Animated, short-lived as it sadly was, is really funny to watch in retrospect because it's like a gender-flipped Steven Universe at times. (Of course, the Gems are basically like an 80s toyline cartoon premise themselves)

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




You can do horror themes without having to be R rated, I bet. I mean, just about every cartoon does.

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Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Snake Eyes is definitely an ironic case of pretty much stealing the show of any scene he's in, probably because the dialogue tends to make every other character worse.

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