Home Automation Is Stupid

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Home Automation Is Stupid

No seriously it sucks
	Yeah
	No it's cool
	I have a disability so it's actually pretty great
	Stop being such a whiner

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

I own a Roomba. Its an older one with no wifi so it can't spy on my poo poo for google tho

# ¿ Jan 8, 2020 04:44

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 09:19

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

Can't wait for my loving lightbulbs to be a botnet that shuts down my bank and gets me shot by cops

# ¿ Jan 8, 2020 04:48

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

Guildenstern Mother posted:

I live in a big stupid loft with zero overhead lighting and walking around manually turning off 12-15 floor lamps when I'm high and sleepy is some peasant rear end bullshit.

Other good things about project smarthome:
- Setting up lighting schemes for things like movie watching
- Autodimming the lights as it gets later at night so your dumb rear end goes to bed at a reasonable hour
- Having them turn on when you turn off your alarm while the homemini bellows the weather and traffic report at you because you forgot to turn down the volume. Again.
- Being able to increase the light in the kitchen because you didn't turn them up before you started cooking and now your hands are covered in the raw chicken you're chopping blindly
-Cooking in general, get your recipe on the home hub, put on music, look up conversions, check what the ideal temp for mid rare is, all without having to wash, dry your hands, find your phone, and interrupt very crucial hamburger helper preparations
- The colored lights you can synch up with your tv or moniter are pretty awesome as well. Very excellent waste of money.

So far no nest, although that would be fantastic. The cameras and doorbells not so much.

edit: I also trained it to respond to "life sucks" by pulling up youtubes of animals being cute.

Sick, all this seems totally worth having an entire flotilla of unpatched linux processors in every socket that I pay the energy costs for while they harvest bitcoins.

# ¿ Jan 8, 2020 04:55

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

strange feelings re Daisy posted:

Ahh, I see you've also watched lovely 90's movie "Ghost in the Machine".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2HPq-WDnFQ&t=48s

I perfer the real version https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-6216451/Security-experts-discover-sophisticated-botnet-seen.html

Relevant twitter: https://twitter.com/internetofshit

# ¿ Jan 8, 2020 05:06

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

Three Olives posted:

I can turn my car air conditioning on with my watch, I can change my bed firmness with my phone, my house HVAC turns on automatically when I start heading home and I can order my groceries to be delivered while I am cooking with my voice, I'm not going to live like an animal when we have a better way.

Huh I wonder which tech company I'd have to pay and how much to make a live feed of your gross little life to mock.

# ¿ Jan 8, 2020 05:10

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 09:19

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2020 03:40

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Home Automation Is Stupid