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Mooey Cow
Jan 27, 2018



Pillbug

The pictures suggest this woman's breasts were located above her arms. Please confirm and/or deny.

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Nascardad
Oct 22, 2009

"Racing is in my blood, I can't quite get out of it yet"


Been dancing in clubs since 2010. Always a pleasure hearing others insane stripper stories.

Discernibly Turgid
Mar 30, 2010


Worst (while healthy) year of my life was spent managing and occasionally bouncing for an ultra-divey Strip club in SW Detroit. For those not in the know, the area is so lovely that the trench that was dug up (for replacement sewer lines a few blocks north of the club) on my first day of work already had a body in it (as deduced by the presence of a coroner’s office van) the morning of my second day.

Between the place being in an incredibly financially depressed area and the main road being worked on, it was a completely out-of-whack risk/reward situation. Really violent and almost nothing above board (including the Mossberg 500 with destroyed serial numbers that lived in the office under the stairs.) Kept a roof over my head while depression kicked my rear end, but only barely.

I escaped to a much better job that used some of my professional skills/certifications just in time. I’d tell some hilarious/hair-raising tales, but I witnessed some poo poo on one of my last days there (great that I got out at all, but I’d have preferred to have been ignorant of certain events) that led to law enforcement putting a LOT of people behind federal bars. Luckily I was never questioned about any of it (thank you, nice bar owner, I guess ) and just saw a front-page, above-the-fold story about it within two weeks or so.

Ugh. Weird memories ITT.

Keep going, OP. This is good stuff and makes me feel better about all of the seriously bad and soul-destroying stuff I witnessed/did (sorry for stuffing you on services rendered, neon sign guy, but I didn’t have a say in the matter and, honestly, I feel like you should’ve figured out things were going to play that way when you first agreed to do the work.)

wit
Jul 26, 2011


Very much subscribed. I've only been to a strip club once, Ireland isn't exactly dripping with them, so I'm a bit of a dweeb when it comes to them. But I had more of a feeling that all the girls were all pretty much in on the same overall wallet inspector plan as a kind group effort and any visible cattiness was just part of the shakedown. Its kind of fun to know that its not true, though trying to disfigure the competition is pretty much the most hosed up part so far.

gbs but from 2004
Oct 24, 2004

wow u rude pig


Peachfart posted:

This is pure GBS from 2004, and for once I mean that in a good way. Good thread.

thanks man

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD


Excited to hear the story of how you left a woman you were sleeping with destitute and crippled OP

Smiling Mandrill
Jan 19, 2015



Did the same when I was younger. Loved everyone I worked with. Had some OK regulars. Almost everyone from outta town, or just dropping in from off the street were universally terrible though. I was able to deescalate pretty well, so avoided most potential fights. But I felt like I was a preschool teacher most days rather than person dealing with other adults. Booze + sex + the entitlement of someone throwing out money = toxic. The most annoying patrons were the "rich" white collar guys, and the wanna be gang banger fuckers. If you dare make them behave all of the white collar guys are best friends with the governor, the mayor, or your boss. And all the gang guys are soon to be famous rappers, high ranking hell's angles, or totally run the bloods up on the east side, and they are all coming back to get you, so "watch your back mother fucker!"

When I left that job it was bitter sweet, made a lot of good friends. At the time it seemed like harmless fun, and almost a dream job. We were all making money hand over fist, and the party life style that came with it almost made you feel like a rockstar. Time has really soured me on that whole experience though. Looking back now its just sad and depressing. A lot of my friends from those days are dead. Quite a few of the girls died from drugs, suicide, or in two cases hooking up with shithead who murdered them. Of all of the girls I've kept in touch with only one of them had a real good happy ending, the rest are all living in poverty, in prison, or still bouncing around clubs in their 40s. It was an experience to be sure, but not one I'm sure I'd have wanted if I knew going into it what I know now.

Comfy Fleece Sweater
Apr 2, 2013


TITTIES! Haha

itry
Aug 23, 2019






OP reminded me of this A/T thread but with weird mspaint drawings.



Is this Leo OP?

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


Nascardad posted:

Been dancing in clubs since 2010. Always a pleasure hearing others insane stripper stories.

So is nascar your second job or..

Spinz
Jan 7, 2020

Party Time! Be excellent to each other.

Nascardad posted:

Been dancing in clubs since 2010. Always a pleasure hearing others insane stripper stories.

Welcome to gbs!!! So awesome to have another lady post

PhysicsFrenzy
May 30, 2011

cats can have little a sunglasses, as a treat

everyone do yourselves a favor and read the full op

looking forward to chapter 2

Cannon_Fodder
Jul 17, 2007

"Hey, where did Steve go?"
Design by Kamoc

Foxy boxing:


Never foxy.


My roommate was a cocktail waitress. That lifestyle completely loving baffled me.

isaboo
Nov 10, 2002

I can destroy you


Chapter 2: TayTay, Psycho, and a car ride

Meet Bryan, aka TayTay:




TayTay (His middle name was Taylor) became our new DJ at The 'Dise sometime in 1995 and shortly thereafter became my roommate. Hoo boy.

TayTay was a big dude. He was about 6'7" 270lbs and sorta looked like Billy Ray Cyrus; the 1990s Billy Ray. Not Miley's Dad circa today. TayTay's favorite thing in the world was cooking chili or better yet Brunswick Stew. And I mean the traditional southern Brunswick Stew which is made with squirrel meat. His chili was excellent and the Brunswick Stew was surprisingly good though I only ate it a handful of times. He'd stand over those pots forever just silently stirring them, cigarette dangling from his mouth with ashes falling into the food every once in a while, and one hand down his shorts. It seemed to be very hypnotic to him and he often looked like he was in a trance. I don't want to know what he was thinking.

TayTay both loved and hated squirrels. He loved to eat them but otherwise hated them with a passion. He'd hunt them for his stew but he'd also go in the thick woods behind our house and just hunt them for fun. Dude had a loving huge collection of squirrel tails and pelts some of which decorated the walls of his room. He claimed that he was saving up enough to make himself a vest or something. I guess he thought that would make a good look along with the cutoff jean shorts he wore all the drat time. He was always shirtless except at work and I like to think that he would have proudly worn his squirrel vest on his bare chest with the shorts.

He read a lot, which is cool, but dude read a lot of weird poo poo. It was mostly "non-fiction" (used loosely here) Ancient aliens, hollow earth, lizard people on the moon type poo poo. In the 90s there were quite a few self-published magazines and pamphlets around and he would collect as many of them as he could. Some of them were pretty cool especially the weird comics and music publications. There was even Nazi poo poo mixed in but he really never got into that thankfully. But by and large it was just a steady flow of nonsense that he would read.

Including...... Dianetics, by one L Ron Hubbard. We'll return to this later but him picking up that book was the beginning of the end.

I had been living with TayTay for a short while before Viper and I started our thing. After several months Viper said I could crash at her place anytime, even move in if I wanted, so she gave me a key. She had a pretty nice apartment. It was nicely decorated and there were not any animal pelts on the walls and it didn't reek of cigarette smoke. I was pretty happy to have somewhere to go other than that shithole I was in and I was also really curious to just get a glimpse into Viper's private life. There were bananas featured everywhere in the decor though. I should have expected that honestly.

Viper and TayTay started hanging out at her place. There wasn't anything romantic going on between them; they were just two wackadoodles that gravitated toward each other. Since the apartment was Viper's and she didn't take any money from me for bills I really couldn't say anything about him coming over. Sometimes they'd spend hours babbling about whatever crap TayTay was reading. The Dianetics book showed up at Viper's place and I started to get really worried.

Viper was quickly becoming unhinged and TayTay was enabling it, feeding her all sorts of bullshit about Scientology and conspiracies. They started doing more and more hallucinogens. Okay, fine by me. I like them too. But they were often taking god knows what else with them and I'm pretty sure PCP was used at times. He also started encouraging her to do her costuming thing more and more often so that "they couldn't ruin Xenu's plans" by keeping tabs on Viper, the "they" being some sort of nebulous cabal. I guess. I dunno, I tried to tune a lot of that poo poo out. What I couldn't tune out was living with a goddamn lunatic.

One morning I was in the shower, just taking my time and letting the hot water wash over my face with my eyes closed. I heard the door open and of course it wasn't uncommon for us to be in there at the same time so I didn't bother to look. I just said "Hey Michelle". No answer. I said "V? You ok?" Just as I opened my eyes the shower curtain suddenly exploded to the side and all I could see through the water in my eyes was some sort of figure with a raised hand making some sort of screeching sound and a stabbing motion. My loving heart almost burst through my chest and I fell backward into the corner of the shower, slipped and fell and kicked out trying to get this goddamn thing away from me.

"Awwwwww honeeeeeyyyyyyyyyy oh gently caress are you okayyyyyyyyy???" was what I heard. She had a goddamn, motherfucking, stupid rear end banana in her lunatic loving hand. She was laughing as she said it and just having a good old time. She had a red wig on backwards so that it covered her face and a purple sweater and just looked absolutely bent out of her mind.



She did stuff like that several times.

What was once fun (having fantastic sex with a crazy stripper) was quickly starting to unravel me in my general day to day life. Like the day I had to have oral surgery. The surgery went fine and I was expecting Viper to pick me up. For all her faults and craziness she was pretty drat reliable in terms of being somewhere when expected and following through on a promise. For once I wish she had failed me.

I was on some pretty strong drugs from the surgery, I was tired, and I was just in a bad place. The dentist's staff wheeled me out to the car where Viper was waiting, only it was not Viper. At least not to my drug addled eyes. It wasn't the Viper I was used to seeing in her default attire or the costumes I recognized. She was dressed thusly (That's supposed to be a chainmail top):



Now, that was quite a sight to behold when you're whacked out of your mind and in pain and in general just confused as gently caress. The dental assistants knew Viper (everyone did, of course) so they weren't concerened about putting me in the car with my girlfriend. I'm pretty sure she said "give IT to me" when they dumped me in the back seat and off we went.

We didn't get very far out of the parking lot because.... Viper decided that left turns do not exist. She was clearly high as gently caress on something, probably tripping on LSD or shrooms or whateverthefuck.
It was just simply impossible- intellectually, emotionally, or physically- for Viper to make a loving left turn. It was a very, very long 10 miles or so to her place without taking a goddamn left turn. It took us at least an hour and I was livid and losing my loving mind.



Sometimes she would forget what she was doing and actually make a left turn, then start sobbing about how it isn't real and left is wrong and oh god we're going to die. Not a fun ride.

We finally got home and of loving course TayTay was there and was howling his balls off about how funny it all was. If I had been sober I would have broken his loving neck. He said something like "Calm down buddy we just wanted you to have fun on the ride home". I asked him what she had taken but he claimed he didn't know which was utter bullshit. I just wanted the nightmare to end so I went out to her balcony and just passed out and slept there all night.

The next couple of weeks were pretty uneventful. TayTay knew I was mad as hell and steered clear of me and wouldn't work on the same shifts as I did. Viper started to get more and more obsessed with me AND with Scientology and I knew the two of them were still getting together to talk about that horseshit.

It was time for me to get the hell out of there.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009


Nap Ghost

It's a story!

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


Pick posted:

It's a story!

Dude come on, dianetics is a p good read even if you don’t instantly believe it’s all true like a rational person would.

Philthy
Jan 28, 2003



Pillbug

our paradise lounge is called the dise too

it smells like wet cigarettes but the jukebox is loaded with old punk and industrial music so its cool

d0s
Jun 28, 2004



I thought they didn't reveal the xenu stuff until you had spent decades of your life and tens of thousands of dollars on scientology courses and that dianetics was just a kinda weird self-help book used to lure people in. were these people actually going to scientology meetings and fully involved with it?

Coasterphreak
May 29, 2007
I like cookies.

good story, please continue

Alan Smithee
Jan 3, 2005


more plz

pahuyuth posted:

Crazy Leo LOVED Viper. Not in a stripper-worship way, but in a kind of sweet way.

pahuyuth posted:

They did have this one weird thing going on though:



bro

Piggy Smalls
Jun 21, 2015



d0s posted:

I thought they didn't reveal the xenu stuff until you had spent decades of your life and tens of thousands of dollars on scientology courses and that dianetics was just a kinda weird self-help book used to lure people in. were these people actually going to scientology meetings and fully involved with it?

This

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018

SIZE DOESN'T MATTER


lol

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD


I can safely say from both being the child of a stripper as well as dating and living with a stripper that your interactions with them will usually be walking a razor’s edge of nice, normal genuinely sweet, generous people or completely vindictive super psychos who will literally stop at nothing to cause you an undue amount of pain and misery because they’re kind of having an off night.

But coming home to a stone cold dime piece who always has weed and loves to shower you with presents is really nice, and the sex is like super good, so you just take the good with the bad until the inevitable volcanic meltdown. I lived with her for a year before she got her own place (we’re still together) and she dumped me probably once a month. We’d have a huge awful fight, I’d go to bed wondering what the gently caress I was gonna do, and she’d wake me up with breakfast in bed and a BJ and ask what we were doing this weekend like nothing ever happened. Wild poo poo man.

Chapter 2 of this story was way better than Chapter 1, I am officially on board.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com


In hindsight I feel my life is missing something for never having worked with or dated a sex worker.

PhysicsFrenzy
May 30, 2011

cats can have little a sunglasses, as a treat

i need to know how deep this rabbithole goes

Coolguye
Jul 6, 2011

Required by his programming!


Outrail posted:

In hindsight I feel my life is missing something for never having worked with or dated a sex worker.

Having done so a few times: you both are and aren’t. I 100% believe the stories here given my experience and they are great to tell at bars or to friends, but whenever we tell these stories we are leaving out the day to day fear, anger, frustration, existential depression, aches, pains, and health problems we are feeling in these moments.

My worst ex, also a sex worker, stalked me, which was bad enough, but one thing nobody tells you about being stalked is the strain it puts on your body from sleeping in weirder and weirder places so you feel safe while you sleep. I got sick that year more often than the surrounding five.

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD


Yeah I remember last April we looked up my girlfriend’s club because we’d heard it was in the news and discovered that one of the other girls had been raped in a VIP room while my girlfriend was on stage and the management somehow covered it up completely and didn’t tell anyone, including the other girls who worked there. We were very distraught and she didn’t go in for a week or two after that. I know that women have to deal with that as a semi-constant fear but if your girlfriend is a secretary or a school teacher you’re really not as worried about her being sexually assaulted AT WORK as you are when she is naked, and sometimes almost completely alone with drunken, entitled men. This is also widely regarded to be the nicest, most high-end strip club in the entire state.

For the record she stopped dancing about a year ago and her mental health has improved dramatically and she’s noticed a stark change in her emotional availability as well. Sex work has a very weird impact on sex workers that we really, as a society, just don’t understand.

isaboo
Nov 10, 2002

I can destroy you


d0s posted:

I thought they didn't reveal the xenu stuff until you had spent decades of your life and tens of thousands of dollars on scientology courses and that dianetics was just a kinda weird self-help book used to lure people in. were these people actually going to scientology meetings and fully involved with it?

This all happened 25 years ago so I might be hazy on what exactly Viper and TayTay talked about but I'm certain they specifically mentioned Xenu because of events that would come later. I know that the Xenu stuff had been leaked, at least in part, as far back as the mid to late 1980s. The Dianetics book was just one of the pieces of Church literature TayTay had but it was the only one I was familiar with at the time. He was definitely into the whole thing beyond just that novel.
He had people he was in contact with who were already in the Scientology Church proper because he mentioned wanting one of them to set himself and Viper up for an audit. She ultimately did, which will lead us into the final chapter.

I'd like to do something different with the pictures in chapter 3. I have a rough idea but I'm not sure how to actually compose it. If anyone reading has animation or graphic experience and wants to help, please PM me.

Also my wife (she knows about all of my adventures from back in the day) had a great suggestion- if anyone wants to remake each picture into something more realistic or just better, let me know and I might add them in a spoiler link next to my original, uh, "art".

isaboo fucked around with this message at 19:59 on Jan 11, 2020

olylifter
Sep 13, 2007

I'm bad with money and you have an avatar!

Bust Rodd posted:

Yeah I remember last April we looked up my girlfriend’s club because we’d heard it was in the news and discovered that one of the other girls had been raped in a VIP room


what in the gently caress. I've been to a few strip clubs over the years and I've yet to be in one where the bouncers wouldn't hesitate to thoroughly dissuade you from touching the talent (and rightfully so - don't loving touch people without their explicit consent). How did this rapist fuckbag piece of poo poo not end his night folded in two in an alleyway out back of the club.

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

TURDS BOD


olylifter posted:

what in the gently caress. I've been to a few strip clubs over the years and I've yet to be in one where the bouncers wouldn't hesitate to thoroughly dissuade you from touching the talent (and rightfully so - don't loving touch people without their explicit consent). How did this rapist fuckbag piece of poo poo not end his night folded in two in an alleyway out back of the club.

WE DON’T KNOW. None of the dancers wanted to ask and get fired, and that particular dancer never came back. The bouncers at this club are very non-threatening Boomer gentlemen. The only discussion at all was a couple dancers talking in the changing room that it might have been a trick-turning situation where the John didn’t pay up afterwards so she called the cops on him and said it was surprise sex, but this is only based on her being Russian and pretty much all the Slavic women in this particular club being prostitutes. But that’s all here-say from other women in the club and we’ll never know for sure. Whatever it is, it’s just awful.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.


I'm beginning to suspect this viper woman is not of sound mind op

wit
Jul 26, 2011


Dreddout posted:

I'm beginning to suspect this viper woman is not of sound mind op

I'm just baffled someone called viper didn't wear fingerless gloves at all times.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


PhysicsFrenzy posted:

i need to know how deep this rabbithole goes

Depends how hard u wanna groove on poo poo.

OgNar
Oct 26, 2002

They tapdance not, neither do they fart

Dreddout posted:

I'm beginning to suspect this viper woman is not of sound mind op

Its pretty hard to find a stripper that is of sound mind.

I've dated 2, one only danced to NIN and Skinny Puppy and pretty much ended up in prostitution and the other just made tons of cash, and spent it all on her friends to have a fun time. Now she was fun while it lasted.
Also she liked strangling, that was a little weird.

Obsidianheart
Apr 25, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.

OgNar posted:

one only danced to NIN and Skinny Puppy

I verrry briefly dated a stripper who only danced to "Closer", "Last", and "Sin". It wasn't great.

precision
May 7, 2006

Gonna have me some good friends around
Gonna have me some good times in town




This thread is dope my Patriot watching brother

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com


OgNar posted:

Also she liked strangling, that was a little weird.

I did date an actress once so maybe there's a similar mindset? It's a little jarring to have someone want you to choke her out on the first date. Can't we get to know each other first?

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010



precision posted:

This thread is dope my Patriot watching brother

Patriot owned

precision
May 7, 2006

Gonna have me some good friends around
Gonna have me some good times in town





pretty good...

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isaboo
Nov 10, 2002

I can destroy you


(sorry in advance for the terrible dialogue coming. It's the best approximation of what was said according to my aging and overly concussed brain)


Chapter 3 Part 1: A rap God and Xenu's baby

Things returned to "normal" for a while. TayTay wasn't coming around as much, as far as I knew Viper wasn't reading any Scientology literature, and she was actually being pretty sweet to me. She was still loony but not as manic or off-kilter as she had been recently. In fact she started talking about having a future together, wanting to have a baby someday, and dropping hints that she wanted a commitment from me. In my mind I was screaming "gently caress NO" but with her I just said it is something we would have to talk about more. I just didn't want to set off the crazy.

Then I started to get suspcious that something was secretly being planned or talked about between Viper and TayTay while at work. They would pass each other and talk for a short time in hushed tones making furtive glances around to see who was listening. I didn't know if it was now something sexual between them but if so that would have really surprised me. One thing that Viper was not, was someone to sleep with other people while she was banging someone on the regular. Not once did I ever feel like she was (until now, sort of) and to my knowledge she never did. I'm almost certain word would have gotten back to me if she was guilty.

Her increased persistence in talking about a future together and her behavior had me on edge so I went to visit my family for a long weekend. Everything Viper said and did before I left seemed like her regular behavior. When I got back, I found a letter that said something like this:

Dear Beets,
I know I've been pressuring you a lot lately and I'm glad you are taking some time.
I'm going to take some time too. I'm going to California to get a full audit so I can be better for you better for US
I want to be the vessel for a new Xenu and maybe I can find that there too. and I want us to be a happy family. Wouldn't that be great!!
Baby, mommy and daddy together! Body thetan free! I'll be back in a few weeks

I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE US TOGETHER!

Michelle






"Well gently caress. That's not good. Not good at all", I thought. She had clearly snapped, most likely with the help of TayTay and was going straight to crazytown. It was obvious I had to get out of there but I wasn't sure where to go. I figured I had a little bit of time to make plans and could continue to stay at her place in the meantime.

About 3 months went by, and I hadn't heard a word from her. TayTay said he didn't know anything but there was no way he'd tell me anything anyway. TayTay then started showing up at her place talking about moving in and there was no loving way I was going to deal with that. I moved into an extended stay motel and lived there for another 3 months before I decided to leave The Paradise Lounge and the town for good. So, after a total of 6 months of being Viper free I told everyone at The 'Dise that I was leaving, put in my 2 weeks notice and finally had a smile on my face.

I worked my last Friday night shift and made plans with some of the girls and a couple of DJs to have dinner and drinks on Saturday before I left for good on Monday. Saturday night we met at the lounge, piled into someone's car and off we went to a nearby restaurant. A few hours went by and it was time to head back to The 'Dise for one last time. At this point it was around 2:30am, right around the time the weekend card games started. We went inside and were just standing around when one of the working girls came up to me and said

"Hey Beets, Viper was just here and she went looking for you."
"Uh, what?" I replied.
"She heard you were leaving town and came back."
"gently caress. Fuckfuckfuckfuuuuuuuuuuuck" is all I could say.
"Yea if she sees you're not at the restaurant she'll probably come back here"

A few moments later the front door opened and my heart jumped as I expected to see a psychopath with a head full of crazy snakes wielding an axe or something.

Instead, three black gentlemen walked in and then a fourth emerged from behind and stood in front of them.

My jaw hit the loving floor. Everyone's jaw hit the floor.





Tupac Shakur. 2pac was in the motherfucking Paradise Lounge.



The owner Carl was there for the card game and he immediately and excitedly ran over to Tupac, saying "Mr Pac...err... Mr SHOCKyurr"... just absolutely butchering the man's name.

The group of us just stood there mouths wide open in disbelief watching and wondering what the hell was going on. Suddenly Tupac and Carl started laughing and Carl wandered off which seemed really weird given the situation. I've been a fan of Tupac from the first time I heard his music so this was a big deal to me and to everyone else around.
I walked over to Pac and his entourage and said "holy poo poo, are you Tupac?! For real!"

"Motherfucka I fuckin look like Tupac dont I?"
"I love your music!!" I said
"You betta" he replied

In a totally different voice he said "Man I'm just playin' with ya. My name's Darrell I'm a performer these are my dancers we were playing a benefit show in town. But you can call me ThreePac."

I hadn't laughed so hard in a loooong goddamn time. He went on to say that came for the card games they had heard about.
It was uncanny how much this guy looked and sounded like Tupac. If I hadn't come to know better I would have testified to anyone that I had definitely seen Tupac Shakur there that night.

I talked to 3pac for a few minutes until we all heard tires screeching and a loud crash outside in the back parking lot. TayTay and a couple of others went out the back while I went out a side door with 3pac and his crew. There we saw Viper's car had ran into a few trash cans and was next to my car. She stepped out and TayTay was the first to greet her as her back was to us. My jaw dropped once again when I saw her in full view.


isaboo fucked around with this message at 02:12 on Jan 13, 2020

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