- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
-
|
AITA for becoming annoyed with my roommates' fandom decor?
quote:Ok, first time posting here and I'm not a huge reddit user. Sorry for any formatting problems as I'm on my phone.
My housemate (29f) and I (30f) are both pretty nerdy people. She's very into Star Wars and the Marvel movies while I'm more of a video game girl.
If anyone has been to an EB Game store lately you'll know that there are huge amounts of fandom bits and bobs you can buy for around the house. My housemate has completely filled the kitchen and living room with these items. Now that she's decorated these rooms to her liking she has had her eyes on my room.
I have many fandom items on display in my room - a Dishonored mask at the top of my book shelf, a wall of framed Yakuza fanart prints and a few Transformers scattered around next to my fossil collection and orchid plants. I keep my door open during the day as I'm in Australia and would bake if the door was not open.
The other day I came home to find my housemate had removed some of my prints to install some kind of Star Wars led wall lamp setup. When I got annoyed and asked why she took down my art she told me she couldn't fit it anywhere else and it matched the ones she had bought for her room and the living room. She also put up some expensive model of a life sized baby yoda on top of my bookshelf because she would be able to see it when she walked past.
I pulled the lamp down and rehung my prints. I then took down yoda and left both items on the couch. Now my housemate is angry I ruined the theme she was going for in the house. She told me she spent a lot of money on those gifts. But...I don't personally like Star Wars. I've not even seen the newest film or the new tv show because I honestly do not care.
I understand she thinks of these items as gifts, but I let her know that honestly I would be happy with our fandom items staying in our rooms. I'm not buying Dead by Daylight branded cookware, I don't understand why it all needed to be Avengers themed. She got really upset and started slamming things into drawers since I wanted her to 'hide that she's nerdy'.
TLDR: My housemate entered my room to put up decorative items I didn't like, I told her not everything in the house needed to be Star Wars. I feel like I might be the rear end in a top hat as our rooms matching is clearly something she feels strongly about.
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 06:28
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
Apr 25, 2024 13:47
|
|
- Ghost Leviathan
- Mar 2, 2017
-
Exploration is ill-advised.
|
AITA for becoming annoyed with my roommates' fandom decor?
Oh man, this one has a helluva comment.
quote:OP here with an Update!
As I kind of suspected there was something behind this: turns out one of her male friends that she's interested in has decided that because I like video games I am somehow 'less fake' than other nerdy women. I have no idea if he disparaged her collection to her face but according to another person in our group he throws around that he thinks that women who like more accessible nerdy things are boring and fake.
I'm sort of guessing here but if he's throwing the fake nerd girls bullshit around maybe she was trying to make me...less of a threat or something? Idk. It's not something I can say I understand. Plus she knows I'm gay.
I probably sounded a little angrier about the shared spaces in my post than was necessary - I'm cool with her decorating those spaces as I am pretty indifferent to any space as long as it's still usable. There was never a discussion about this but I also never really bought it up before.
I'll be talking to her about going into my room while I'm not there this afternoon. Wish me luck!
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 06:56
|
|
- Motherfucker
- Jul 16, 2011
-
I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.
|
how is this a question? It doesn't matter if you decorate with loving anime wall scrolls and severed human fingers if someone comes up into your space and starts loving your poo poo that's a huge violation and weird as all loving hell.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 07:07
|
|
- Evil Willow
- Apr 26, 2007
-
Bored now...
|
Having keyed locks on your bedroom door really should be more common than it is
OP said that she lives in Australia and keeps her door open so the room doesn't get too hot.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 08:17
|
|
- Evil Willow
- Apr 26, 2007
-
Bored now...
|
Husband keeps peeing on floor and blaming my germaphobia...
quote:I know this may sound crazy.... so please bear with me.
I will admit that I have pretty bad OCD where I freak out about cleanliness and germs, and it’s become a lot worse since the pandemic and now that I’m pregnant. However, for the past 4-5 months for some reason my husband cannot help but dribble pee on the bathroom floor when he pees. To me, it is absolutely disgusting and after accidentally stepping in it a few times it’s become one of my obsessions that I have to check for pee before using the bathroom, which now that I am 7 months pregnant is very frequent.
After arguing and fighting with him about it for months he finally agreed to try sitting while he peed, but for some reason it’s still not helping fully. Tonight I noticed while I was using the bathroom that my toe was in a small puddle of pee. I got really upset and complained to him but he turned it around to me being crazy and my OCD, pretty much saying that it’s not a big deal. It’s really frustrating. Not only because I feel like he’s not taking me seriously due to my condition but also I have to constantly clean his messes with this huge pregnant belly and it’s getting to be harder and harder to do.
Please, am I being irrational? If not, how do I get through to him?? Would appreciate any advice at all.
Like.... how hard is it to wipe up any stray drips off the tip, or to, I dunno, wipe the drat floor?? gently caress people are gross.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 08:20
|
|
- Toplowtech
- Aug 31, 2004
-
|
AITA for thinking my wife is being materialistic and immature?
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 08:44
|
|
- AreWeDrunkYet
- Jul 8, 2006
-
|
I realized what the thread title was reminding me of. There's a line in Bojack Horseman, "my mother is dead now, and everything is worse." He realized a lot of things are actually wrong, but it's a general despair highlighted by a specific loss.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 09:26
|
|
- Flared Basic Bitch
- Feb 22, 2005
-
Invading your personal space since 1968.
|
AITA for becoming annoyed with my roommates' fandom decor?
Burn them with fire for intruding on your personal space. But keep the baby yoda because that fucker’s god drat adorable.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 10:41
|
|
- Ghost Leviathan
- Mar 2, 2017
-
Exploration is ill-advised.
|
Burn them with fire for intruding on your personal space. But keep the baby yoda because that fucker’s god drat adorable.
This is the way.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 10:52
|
|
- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
-
|
AITA for telling my wife she was wrong to get mad at my father, and she doesn't understand how to set boundaries?
quote:So my mom is horrible. She has bullied my wife in the past and there is just nothing we can do about it, because she can't be reasoned with, she doesn't care about boundaries, and everyone else enables her, so we went no contact a couple years ago. I really feel for my dad, because he is caught in the middle, though my wife feels like its his fault for being with my mom, so we just agree to disagree on that.
My dad spends Christmas with us, without my mom, once every three years. This year was his first year doing it, and my sister came as well, so my mom didn't have any family, but she has a lot of friends, so I assumed she was not alone. I guess my wife thought the opposite.
Yesterday we saw my dad and Christmas came up. My wife said she would think spending Christmas alone would teach my mom a lesson. My dad replied that my mom wasn't alone. She was on Brad (hella rich family friend)'s yacht and it looked pretty amazing. My wife immediately got mad at my dad and said he should not have said that, and he could have at least let he think she "won" My dad did kind of laugh at her and say she doesn't get to win, and he would never leave my mom totally alone on Christmas. My wife was cold to my dad for the rest of lunch, and we fought in the car.
I said that she should not have been rude to my dad, because all he did was tell her a fact. She maintains that he shouldn't have "rubbed it in" and that my mom deserved to be alone. i told my wife that the point of boundaries/no contact, is to protect our mental health and not to punish my mom. My wife ended up getting mad at me, and she said I talked like a therapist, and that I should stop being "clinical" and let her have her feelings, and that I minimized how she was feeling.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 11:38
|
|
- vonnegutt
- Aug 7, 2006
-
Hobocamp.
|
AITA for telling my wife she was wrong to get mad at my father, and she doesn't understand how to set boundaries?
quote:
My wife ended up getting mad at me, and she said I talked like a therapist, and that I should stop being "clinical" and let her have her feelings, and that I minimized how she was feeling.
The few times "you sound like a therapist" has been said to me, it's A. usually in response to me trying really hard not to escalate an argument ("It feels like you're just trying to get a rise out of me, so I'm done with this argument for now") and B. always a total rear end in a top hat move
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 13:40
|
|
- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
-
|
AITA for having a wedding at Disney World?
quote:I got married at Disney world Florida in Jan 2020. I am a big time fan of 1930s Hollywood glamor, and wanted my wedding to be at Disney world in front of the tower of terror ride. If you dont know, this ride is a drop ride that is modelled after the twilight zone show, and the hotel looks like an Art Deco/1930s era hotel. The music and everything made it perfect for my wedding, and I've loved the ride in Florida and CA since I was a kid (RIP Vera Lynn and Dland CA tower of terror).
I kept the guest list to 75 and it was a dream come true. I did not possibly become the AH until after the wedding. My husband has a huge family and we had to cut to keep 75.
We visited his family for xmas and they asked how much did the wedding cost. Only for context: $85K everything combined. I didn't feel like it would be a problem telling them as it was almost 1 year ago. They flipped out.
They did so because my husband's cousin was in hospice care. His cousins parents struggled to pay for the care, and were not invited to the wedding due to guest list limitations. They told me I could've gone to the court house, spend maybe 3K on that, and then try to help my husbands now deceased cousin with better end of life care.
They also said my wedding was wasteful, despite my parents paying for it (I just outed myself as having a wealthy background). I regret not telling them it was my parents money, but I am the only child and thus only wedding they will see.
AITA for having an expensive wedding when I knew there were struggling family that could use the money ?
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 14:29
|
|
- AceClown
- Sep 11, 2005
-
|
It's ALWAYS Disney with these trashy fucks
It's almost like a giant place of carefully manufactured happiness can distract you from the toxic life you've self created.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 15:21
|
|
- Motherfucker
- Jul 16, 2011
-
I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.
|
AITA for having a wedding at Disney World?
I hate this because on the one hand she spent all that cash on a fuckin' disney wedding but on the other hand if my family felt entitled to my cash like that I'd feel entitled to drop them all in the garbage like a fat sack of trash.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 15:21
|
|
- the holy poopacy
- May 16, 2009
-
hey! check this out
-
Fun Shoe
|
AITA for having a wedding at Disney World?
yes, but also, who tf expects their cousin to drop $82k on extra hospice care
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 15:26
|
|
- Motherfucker
- Jul 16, 2011
-
I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.
|
Here in American for the low low price of 82k you can get the kinda hospice care where the orderlies don't take turns dropping loogies into your upturned comatose mouth.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 15:27
|
|
- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
-
|
AITA for attending a wedding I'd been uninvited from?
quote:Quick edit: I made this throwaway 2 days ago and have had this post in my notes app trying to whittle it down to the character limit. I know there's currently a popular post about uninviting a sister to a wedding, but just want to stress that my decision to post this has nothing to do with that post!
My brother (28M at the time) married Maggie (29F) in 2019, pre-COVID.
Maggie is my (25F at the time) ex boyfriend's (25M) sister. They met as a result of ex and I being in a relationship.
Ex and I dated for 3 years, and broke up in 2018, after he cheated. He's engaged to the other woman currently. Obviously I was hurt at first, but neither of us were happy and this was a chance to get out. I had no contact with ex, never spoke to the other woman, and minded my own business. I also didn't treat Maggie any differently because she's his sister. To me, she is just my brother's partner and I always acted like a friend to her.
Maggie was definitely a bridezilla. After the engagement, she took control of wedding planning and made all of the decisions. Only thing my brother chose were the suits for himself and the groomsmen (although even then, it had to be in a Maggie-approved style and colour).
Maggie sat me down one day and told me that she "didn't want there to be any family drama on her wedding day". She'd spoken to ex and apparently he said he'd feel uncomfortable if he had to be around me at the wedding, especially as his fiance would be there too. This suprised me because, like I say, I didn't talk to him and was genuinely over it.
I reassured Maggie that she needn't worry, and she said she'd "made the tough decision to uninvite me" and she "hoped I understood that it was her day and she just wanted it to be a happy one".
Excuse me? It's my brother's day too and I want to see him get married! I called my brother afterwards - he was aware of Maggie's choice and HE wanted me to be there, but he didn't want to upset Maggie by saying no to her. I love him but he has the backbone of a slug and rarely stands up for himself.
My parents were furious at how unreasonable Maggie was being, since they know full well I wouldn't have made a fuss about ex. They talked to her but she wouldn't budge ("not your wedding, not your choice").
I ignored Maggie's request and turned up at the wedding with my parents anyway, and it was a lovely ceremony!
There wasn't a wedding meal for me, but I nipped out to grab dinner from a cafe, before returning to the reception and having a great time, dancing with my brother, drinking and just enjoying myself. I didn't acknowledge ex or his fiance once. I didn't need to! I was there for my brother. He told me he was so happy I'd attended, and it wouldn't have been the same without his little sister.
Maggie didn't kick off, but she gave me dirty looks the whole time and I could see her whispering to people, who would then also give me dirty looks.
After the day, she blew up at me for undermining her and "ruining her wedding" (nothing happened, she just didn't enjoy it because she spent it feeling angry).
I know it's lovely to crash a wedding, but I feel like I had a right to be there as it was my brother's wedding too?
AITA?
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 15:39
|
|
- there wolf
- Jan 11, 2015
-
by Fluffdaddy
|
AITA for attending a wedding I'd been uninvited from?
This'll be a great story at future family get-togethers post brother's inevitable divorce from Maggie.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 16:36
|
|
- Sisal Two-Step
- May 29, 2006
-
mom without jaw
dad without wife
i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry
|
I love 1930s old Hollywood glam, so naturally I decided to have my wedding at a theme park attraction (???)
e: another entry for the cool sibling file.
AITA for agreeing to take in my sister but not my step sisters when my parents wanted to go on vacation
quote:I (f20) have a sister (f17) and two step sisters (f15) and (f13). My mom remarried close to 2 years ago. She’s been persistent with forcing my sister to have a relationship with her husband and his kids and because of that my sister escapes to my house. I live with my boyfriend (m21) in a 2 bedroom apartment. So, my boyfriend and i agreed to let the second room basically turned into my sister’s room.
She’s over almost every other week after fighting with my mom about her forcing relationship between her and the other two girls. Onto today’s events, my mom and her husband wants to get away for a week. My mom asked if i could take in all three girls (they don’t trust the girls home alone due to the house being wrecked and a lot more the last time they left them alone- another story for another day). I said i could take in my sister but not my step sisters because 1, i wasn’t comfortable having them over when i barely met them no more than 2-3 times and 2, it wouldn’t be enough space.
My mom suggested i let them all share the room my sister stays in when she comes over and i said i wasn’t going to force that onto her. She asked if i could just let them sleep on the couch and i said it wouldn’t be right because the couch is small and even the 13 year old wouldn’t fit.
She started getting pissy with me and said she didn’t like my favoritism and how would my step sisters feel if they knew i “didn’t want them around” which is not even close to true. I may be TA here, i told her i didn’t care to have a relationship with them and they’re strangers to me. I said that i don’t hate them but i can’t love them because i do not know them
She said my sister acted the way she did because of the way i behave which also isn’t true. My sister is her own person with her own feelings. I never once told my sister i disliked my step sisters. All i’ve said to her was that it was fine if she didn’t want to be close to them that a relationship isn’t a relationship if it’s forced.
My mom said i was an rear end in a top hat for forcing them to postpone their vacation and telling her i didn’t love my step sisters. AITA here
Edit: My moms husband has no family (that i’m aware of) outside of his brother and sister. His brother lives 12+ hours away and his sister, an 8 hour drive (that’s how long it took her to travel here for the wedding). Other than that i don’t know of any other family he has. The girls mom passed away when they were pretty young.
Now, why my sister isn’t interested in being friendly with our step sisters?- My mom has forced her for the last two years to share everything she has with them. And when i say everything, i mean everything possessions to clothes. I’m sure my step sisters know they can get away with using her stuff. They lost their mom at a young age and my mom wants to fill in that spot and thinks she’s doing so by giving them whatever they want. I can go on for days on how my mom has put their wants before my sister’s needs.
Why i’m not interested having a relationship with them?- Overall it dies down to how they treat my sister. They’re mean to her and they get away with it because my mom thinks they’re trying to fight for her attention. I’ve explained that’s not the way to do it and she thinks she knows best...
I think i covered all of the questions and gave more info for those of you who asked.
Why are they going on vacation during a pandemic? .....I do not know
Why she didn’t offer me to stay at her house? Idk that either. But even then i wouldn’t have anywhere to sleep.I could’ve possibly shared with my sister but again, she wanted them to come to my house.
As far as my sister moving in with me (now or in the future) that’s all up to her! She’s a really smart girl and she makes her own decisions. I won’t make her feel like she has to move here but she knows she can if/when she wants to. Sisal Two-Step fucked around with this message at 17:39 on Jan 9, 2021
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 17:29
|
|
- Khanstant
- Apr 5, 2007
-
|
I don't trust any dude who pees standing up.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 17:49
|
|
- welcome to hell
- Jun 9, 2006
-
|
AITA for calling my girlfriend’s new hair upsetting?
quote:
15 years ago, I (46M) lost the love of my life, who was 21 at the time. We were engaged and she was and still is the most charming and gorgeous woman I’ve ever met.
After her death I didn’t date or even look anybody in a romantic way for close to 7 years and promised myself I’d never marry.
For the past 8 years I have been dating my girlfriend (43F). After the birth of our second child, our son, I agreed that she should move in.
A year and a half prior to the birth of our son, she gave birth to our first child, a daughter.
Ever since our son was born, she’s been neurotic. She keeps crying that she’s aged and randomly accuses me of making disgusted faces at her body and ignoring her. She also keeps asking if she should get Botox even though she hates needles.
She complains that her parents and relatives shake their head at her, telling her she barely earns above minimum wage and that she has no real financial commitment from me. I honestly think she tells me this think to guilt trip me into emotionally coddling her all the time.
When my girlfriend moved in she was also extremely upset about the keepsakes from my late fiancée in my home including the ring I gave her and pictures of us together to cherish her memory.
Both me and my late fiancée were avid artists and swapped drawings of each other. My girlfriend in particular keeps staring at one painting that I had gifted my late fiancée after I had proposed which my fiancée later put on a sticky note that joked“ you finally got the shade of blonde right”
My fiancée had waist length, straight and thick platinum blonde hair while my girlfriend has chestnut brown curly hair. After our son was born, she cried that her hair was practically coming out in clumps and that her curls were impossible to control.
I come home from a week’s trip to my hometown yesterday and my girlfriend comes up to me and hugs me. I literally do nothing but stare because her hair is now completely white blonde. And upon a closer look it seemed to be less curly too.
My girlfriend beams at me and says she needed a change and if I liked it. I blurted out “ How could you even ask that?”
She gets angry and said she liked blonde hair and I didn’t seem to hate it either so what’s the problem. Then she gets snarky and says that she’s actually unique to my beloved fiancée because this was not platinum blonde hair, and it was wavy rather than straight.
I told her I was aware that it looked nothing like my late fiancée’s hair because anybody who even tried to imitate my fiancée looks like a cheap knockoff.
I asked her if she could honestly tell me that my late fiancée didn’t at least influence her to go blonde. My girlfriend didn’t answer convincingly and I got mad and called what she did upsetting.
Now we haven’t talked for around a day and woke up in the middle of the night sniffing loudly before telling me she’s sorry she’s not as gorgeous as my former fiancée and accused me of hating her for aging. AITA?
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 17:54
|
|
- Pope Corky the IX
- Dec 18, 2006
-
What are you looking at?
|
AITA for calling my girlfriend’s new hair upsetting?
Uh, holy poo poo
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 17:56
|
|
- henkman
- Oct 8, 2008
-
|
There's a lot going on in there, but
quote:
For the past 8 years I have been dating my girlfriend (43F). After the birth of our second child, our son, I agreed that she should move in.
got me good
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 18:14
|
|
- CharlestheHammer
- Jun 26, 2011
-
YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!
|
I misread that as move on and I thought I was reading a fever dream
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 18:15
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
Apr 25, 2024 13:47
|
|
- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
-
|
AITA For Telling My Husband I Am Disappointed In Him For Going Into Work Leaving Me To Deal With Our Dying Pet Myself?
quote:My husband and I lost one of our beloved pets two days ago. He was at the end of the natural lifespan for his species and had multiple health issues that were being treated. We knew he was on borrowed time and that we would probably lose him this year, but we were taken by surprise by a sudden and severe decline that literally happened over night.
We did what we could to keep him comfortable, and decided that we would take him in to the vet to help him peacefully pass if he held on till morning.
My husband's work starts earlier than the vets are open. So he napped on and off through out the night while cuddling our pet. Our pet had always been more bonded with my husband and spent what little energy he had left to crawl back into my husbands arms whenever they shifted.
When it came close to the time my husband was supposed to leave for work, he hemmed and hawed a bit and got ready. I asked why didn't he call out. He said he couldn't because he already had 5 tardies and call outs and missed the window to call out (has to be done an hour before his shift starts)
So husband went to work. Our little guy held on and I took him into the vet and let him go by myself.
Later that day, husband asked if I was ok and I told him I was really disappointed in him. He has been late to work so often for reasons entirely his own doing (Staying up late playing video games then hitting snooze too often) and that it felt really lovely to have to do something so heartbreaking all on my own.
This spurred an argument between us. He told me I wasn't being fair and that I was being an rear end to try and guilt him so soon after the passing of our boy.
I am probably an rear end for bringing it up while the grief is so new, but I also believe my POV is totally valid. Hubby let me down and I wanted him to know it.
EDIT FOR CLAIRIFICATION:
I worded my OP poorly. I did not tell my husband I was disappointed for him going into work that day. And I am truly not. I am upset about all the past times he was late. And yes, I had expressed that to him before.
The actual thing I said was along the lines of:
"I am disappointed with you. You've been late so many times for work because you stay up late, that when I really needed you, you couldn't be there. It feels really lovely to do this all alone"
ADDITIONAL EDIT: multiple people have taken issue with my description of one of my husband's absences from work as a mental health day"
My husband does not suffer from any mental illness.
"Mental health day" is what we call our lazy, I just don't feel like going in or I would rather do something more fun than work days.
His mental health day was the release day of a new video game he was looking forward to. He was scheduled off the following day but wanted to make it a 2 day event. So he called in and told them had a stomach bug and couldn't make it.
Then he ordered pizza and vegged in front of the TV for 14 or so hours. Then did the following the second day.
And yes, his decision to do this was after he already had several lates and other absences.
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 18:44
|
|
#
?
Jan 9, 2021 06:28
