r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

cumshitter posted:

What exactly constitutes an emergency Subway order?

surely you can empathise with needing a footlong immediately

# ¿ Feb 5, 2020 09:32

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# ¿ Apr 16, 2024 23:40

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

pentyne posted:

Something like adding ranch dressing and potato chips to a spicy Italian sub probably.

It's meat, marinara, and tinned peaches

# ¿ Feb 6, 2020 00:34

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

yes but your holes will be in serious trouble

# ¿ Feb 6, 2020 21:40

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

no-one asked you

e: motherfucker!!

# ¿ Feb 10, 2020 13:15

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

What does happen next?

# ¿ Feb 11, 2020 01:14

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

im not sure they're actually reading this thread

# ¿ Feb 15, 2020 10:29

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

JacquelineDempsey posted:

They should've done what a friend of mine did.

Her bf had this embarrassing shirt, think Guy Fieri flaming-dragons-bowling-shirt. He never even really wore it, but refused to get rid of it, and it drove her nuts just seeing it in the closet. She called it "THAT Shirt".

She hosted a regular "girls' night" where we ate chocolate and cheese, got drunk on girly poo poo like prosecco and white zinfandel, and vented about our men (or lack thereof). On one get-together, she brought That Shirt out, and we all properly mocked it. And a wine-fueled plan was hatched.

She gave the shirt to one woman who was soon going to visit relatives in Korea. While there, she got a friend/relative to wear That Shirt for some pictures. Then it got sent to another friend, who was visiting Paris, so now there's a pic of That Shirt in front of the Eiffel Tower. And so on and so forth. That Shirt traveled around the world for the better part of a year. He never noticed it was gone, until we had a party with all the couples involved and watched a hilarious slide show of all the places That Shirt had been.

I think it's still out in the wild somewhere.

I think the sticking point would be that this would have to be done with the husband's entire wardrobe that he presumably wears frequently

if the husband can be convinced to spend a year as a nudist then this idea potentially has legs

# ¿ Feb 15, 2020 19:42

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

D34THROW posted:

loving polyamory I can barely keep my loving wife happy, how in the gently caress do people manage more than one?

they don't

# ¿ Feb 26, 2020 21:31

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

no-one on this forum says they are straight

# ¿ Feb 27, 2020 20:23

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

SpaceViking posted:

I think the really boring solution to this mystery is that his boxers ended up in the laundry with the sheets and nobody noticed when they were making the bed.

right, good. sounds plausible. but how about we add adultery to this

# ¿ Feb 28, 2020 22:53

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

chitoryu12 posted:

I have told bartenders to cut people off before as their partner in drinking, but only when it came to the point where there would be problems if they kept going. I have a very high alcohol tolerance and few people I know can actually match me drink-for-drink, so I've had to end a night early when I was still fine and the 5'1 girl was going to fall out of her stool or throw up if she had another shot.

my ears are burning

# ¿ Feb 29, 2020 21:38

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

if you don't give me the full measure of vodka... i'll die

# ¿ Feb 29, 2020 23:28

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

ggreat conversation guys

# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 00:26

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

im a bar manager and i put extra alcohol in all drinks that we serve. moreover, if someone's drunk i order my staff to force them to drink more. this is standard practice in the trade, i take no pleasure in this.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 01:19

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

Lolling for real at that left turn.

i was only half-reading it and i thought he was talking to the 5y old at first

# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 11:31

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Mods please change name to "Zoltar (fake name)"

nice try, Zoltar

# ¿ Mar 2, 2020 00:32

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Miserable Maid posted:

I was gonna argue that Reddit is actually overly lenient to women (especially in AITA)

hmm

# ¿ Mar 2, 2020 00:58

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Kitchner posted:

For what it's worth if I saw a guy wearing a t-shirt with a vaguely viking like design on it and there was literally nothing else of note about them, I would assume they are some weird nerd and not a white supremacist.

The number one indicator that you're racist to me is that you own an England flag and you display it on your house, car, or white van.

especially if you live in the states

# ¿ Mar 6, 2020 00:55

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Chomp8645 posted:

Most elderly folk are capable of verbal communication.

sadly

# ¿ Mar 6, 2020 20:23

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

13Pandora13 posted:

It's a lot of surface area, moist, and a fairly neutral nutrient base. Lots of things can grow very quickly on it.

same

Trapick posted:

eggs are thoroughly washed and disinfected post-lay.

same

# ¿ Mar 7, 2020 11:05

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Helen Highwater posted:

This is fake as gently caress.

There aren't any unis at 'Oxbridge' because it's not a place that exists.

If she had already interviewed and got an offer then they wouldn't say 'Oxbridge', they'd say which of the two cities it was, and they wouldn't be going to 'a uni' at either of those cities, they'd be going to 'a college' at the University of Wherever.

furthermore, i bet Lucy isn't even her real name!!

# ¿ Mar 8, 2020 13:09

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Ghost Leviathan posted:

You should probably actually read the post.

this is a terrible idea

# ¿ Mar 8, 2020 17:16

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

I've officially hit 150 viewings of Toy Story 3 today. Kill me.

do you have like an entire wall of tvs set up or something

e: oh right misunderstood that

# ¿ Mar 8, 2020 18:45

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

it's just a big pizza, dude. it means they have a large oven

# ¿ Mar 8, 2020 22:09

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

# ¿ Mar 14, 2020 00:35

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

You know this is a video game right?

And that video games are not real?

video games are real

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 01:13

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Tetramin posted:

Why didn�t he say the loving actor

it was rowan atkinson

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 15:00

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

ugh my ears are burning

e: actually that looks like i'm saying i have huge tits, which is also true

# ¿ Mar 20, 2020 17:59

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

DeadMansSuspenders posted:

My boyfriend [22 M] said it's not his job to keep me [21 F] laid. possible NSFW

cumshitter... your expertise is required to resolve this...

# ¿ Mar 20, 2020 19:19

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

nah looks fine. your children aren't actually people, they're vectors for your own decisions and desires. if they don't do what you say you're well within your rights to evict them or kill them with a hammer, especially if they want to get involved with the french.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2020 21:59

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Sloth Life posted:

Kissing family in the lips will never NOT BE WEIRD. I'm sorry, just ewwww. For the record I came from a very huggy lovey family but lip locking me old ma is not happening. Cheeks are foreheads are fine.

who the hell are you, NOT tom brady???

# ¿ Mar 21, 2020 11:10

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

this has the added benefit of potentially also writing off a redditor

# ¿ Mar 21, 2020 20:05

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

what kind of animal microwaves things

i mean i guess a border collie is smart enough

# ¿ Apr 9, 2020 23:42

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

chimps, presumably, if sufficiently motivated

# ¿ Apr 9, 2020 23:53

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

oh i bet an octopus definitely could, but it's doubtful it would have the opportunity

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 00:33

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

in today's episode of 'things goons struggle with', we will take a look at the concept of baths

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 10:32

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

yeah but there's so much underhead

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 12:25

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

Licarn posted:

no wanky no happy

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 13:04

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

i mean

how do you compete

# ¿ Apr 11, 2020 00:44

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# ¿ Apr 16, 2024 23:40

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

cumshitter's dark secret

# ¿ Apr 11, 2020 15:16

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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