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istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Shaocaholica posted:

Borg cube got owned by pacifist space flowers that didn't have any weapons or shields.

It's too bad that Galoob isn't still making Micro Machines so that I could get a Micro Machines space flower

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istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym


This utterly fails to explain why each episode feels like it was handled by five different writers handling one scene each.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Tip posted:

Hey remember how they made a huge deal at the beginning of the season about how the synths have to be made in pairs? Where the gently caress is Picard's twin?

I want two Picards in season two.

Special Guest Star: Tom Hardy

I don't feel like I'm spoiling much by saying the season basically ends with the crew Picard cobbled together for this one specific mission staying together for no apparent reason, with no apparent destination or goal in mind, giving me no real reason to tune back in. But I will probably end up kicking them another 10 bucks next year and binge-watching the drat thing anyway.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Timby posted:

Spiner really, really loves money.

I mean, really loves it, even though he hasn't needed to work for 25 years.

To be fair, he also really loves Irving Berlin!

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Selected scenes from season 2. I think there's more leaks floating around; if anybody finds them post here

INT. LA SIRENA SHUTTLEBAY – DAY

ELNOR is seated meditating with his blade across his lap. He is now completely covered in red fur, with a bulbous orange nose. In the background, SOJI casually bench-presses a runabout.

RAFFI enters, trailing a cloud of snakeweed vapor, and does a sharp double-take upon seeing Elnor. She drops her vape pen, but Elnor swiftly moves to catch it before it shatters against the deck.

ELNOR: There is no need to be alarmed. Admiral Picard’s sage guidance has enabled me to discover important truths about myself and progress to the next stage of my Qowat Milat training. I am now Elno.



INT. LA SIRENA SICKBAY – DAY

JIVAS FAJO, Kivas’ heretofore unseen brother, is restrained to the medical bed. One of his arms is missing. PICARD and DR. JURATI stand over him, with ELNO guarding them to the side, blade drawn.

PICARD: You are guilty of kidnapping and enslaving over one hundred synthetic life forms. We have successfully located and rescued all but two. I’m going to ask you again… Where are those synths?

FAJO: You fuckers can’t loving do this to me! I have loving rights! gently caress!

A new hologram double of RIOS enters frame left, clad in sweatpants and a stained tank top, speaking with an exaggerated New Jersey accent.

RIOS HOLO: Step aside, JL. I’ll make this rat talk.

FAJO: Who the gently caress are you?!

The hologram begins untying his sweatpants.

RIOS HOLO: I’m the Emergency Defecation Hologram.

CUT TO

CLOSEUP on Fajo’s horrified expression as the EDH bends over, his bare bum moving menacingly towards Fajo’s chest.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Bonzo posted:

We all know what Season 2 needs .


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNOeWrLxcOM

Actually....season 2 needs to prove it can handle him

Holy crap, he was in Elite Force 2? It might be time to go back and finally finish that game...

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Origami Dali posted:

picard had a cheap ripoff of the sonic screwdriver from doctor who

or maybe a Green Lantern ring

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Captain Hygiene posted:

Apparently Picard is the show that's finally breaking my longtime willingness to go in on any Trek show, even knowing I may not like it, based on my overall love for the franchise. :sigh:

It did break my willingness to indulge in new Trek. Although, to be fair, between the Abrams movies and Discovery being Yet Another Prequel so we can rope in the Iconic (i.e. most easily marketable) TOS characters, my patience had already worn thin.

My friends have been asking me if I'm going to watch this season, and it's a hard no. If I hear really good things, there's a slim chance I might kick them $10 or just :filez: when the season is over, but I'm not going to stay subscribed for the full run like I did for season 1.

It does seem like de Lancie is doing a fairly good job, though? His inclusion wasn't necessarily an indicator of quality for me, as it was obvious pretty quickly that Q wasn't going to work in the context of DS9, and the Voyager Q episodes were some of the worst, most disappointing poo poo that they ever shat.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym


This is the same problem I had with Chabon’s series of “well, actually” Instagram posts during season 1. If you have to resort to other media after the fact to explain inconsistencies in your story, you done hosed up.

I don’t get why the producers don’t seem to understand that the fans are going to nitpick a new Star Trek show (or any grognard sci-fi show) to hell and back. That’s what the fans have been doing the entire time the show has been around! Over 50 years! Instead, each time they want to flog the dead horse for a few more scraps, they bring somebody in who spouts some crap about being a true fan who loves these iconic characters, blah blah blah…

I’m just grateful that Avery Brooks would most likely laugh in their faces if they approached him about a DS9 revival.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Vitruvian Manic posted:

I feel like internal consistency is something fans impose from the outside instead of something real that exists from creators. there are like gods that teleport and sentient AIs and the US constitution. the show is basically the twilight zone with a reoccurring cast.

In a sense, yes; there’s turbonerd edifices like http://www.ditl.org that try to nail down and reconcile every last detail, even when those details were fairly often just made up on the spot during the demanding weekly grind of producing a TV show. But the production companies often participate in reinforcing this themselves. In the 90s, there were an official Star Trek encyclopedia and chronology written by people directly involved in production design. Lucasfilm also has that poor bastard who’s the “keeper of the holocron” for Star Wars and is supposed to make that whole mess hang together somehow, including all the tie-in novels and comics.

At times, they do recognize that internal consistency is a key component of the escapism that keeps people coming back. So crapping out inconsistent and terrible writing just makes it feel like they’re squeezing for the last few drops they can get out of the brand.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

appropriatemetaphor posted:

skipping a step and not watching a show i don't like and then piecing together my complaints second hand

exactly what I’m doing tbh

it’s not “fun” per se but it does make me feel included and accepted

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Mulaney Power Move posted:

weeeeelllll, it's the picard show
it's a big bad show all right

If they got Big ShowPaul Wight to come back for another guest spot, that probably would cause me to instantly sign up and binge-watch the whole damned thing, after all.

I guess the surviving Romulan incest twin got written out, though? So he can’t get power-slammed through an exploding bridge console?

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Why’d they keep the warp-speed effect from the Abrams movies? It’s just a lovely ripoff of the hyperspace effect from Star Wars! Because JJ really wanted to be directing Star Wars instead!

The Human Crouton posted:

end this madness.

I doubt they will. They just managed to re-merge Paramount and CBS into Viacom after failing as two separate companies, and Trek is their strongest bid to compete with the Marvel money-printing machine. I really hope somebody writes a book about the Viacom breakup and re-merger, it will doubtless be more entertaining than any Trek in the past 20 years.

And I guess I’m officially a jaded elder millennial now, because nuTrek is already over for me. If anyone brings it up, I continually mention how I used to be a huge fan, but that was a long time ago. And then I try to change the subject before I descend into a detailed rant. It’s kind of crazy to think… I first became interested when there was still merchandise flaunting the 25th anniversary of TOS on the shelves, and now it’s almost been 25 years since there was any Trek content I really enjoyed.

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Have they given Spiner an excuse to show up and sing Sinatra yet?

istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

My friend showed me the first episode of The Man Who Fell To Earth, another Alex Kurtzman production, and I enjoyed it well enough. The problem is, there's no guarantee that the later episodes won't go completely off the rails.

Everything about this season of Picard sounds utterly ill-conceived. I thought maybe I would one day binge-watch these last two seasons as part of a Patrick Stewart career retrospective, but no, it seems like the whole show is best avoided entirely.

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istewart
Apr 13, 2005

Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Captain Hygiene posted:

I haven't seen that yet but I've been wondering how it worked out. The show feels like he's at the point of just getting his lines out enough to get through production, I figured any other role was gonna be like that.

Mostly exposition, but the scene where he tries to save Scarlet Witch's parallel-universe counterpart demonstrates that he can still sell an intense, fairly abstract situation. I've never been worried about his acting skills fading; I just can't fathom why he's willing to accept such crap material for Picard if it's supposed to be his swan song for the character. (Marvel, on the other hand, will surely keep bringing him back for cameos much as JJ Abrams did with Nimoy.)

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