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I was a cub scout in 3rd and 4th grade. Things I remember: Eagle Cave, where scouts from all over the area would go to sleep in a giant cave and play poo poo tons of Mario Bros. (not Super Mario Bros, the one before that) in the cafeteria. The Scoutmaster blacklisted Eagle Cave after the 2nd time I went 'cuz "all the drat kids do the whole drat time is play vid'ya games!" Camp Lisle, the first camp I went to without toilets, instead it had outhouses. I held my poop in for 3 days before I got sick and feverish. My dad was a chaperone and knew exactly what was wrong and told me to go poop and I did and felt better within an hour. Also, a fellow cub scout told me his mom gave my dad a blowjob. This was right before my parents got divorced, so.... maybe? Pinewood Derby, I made a car that was pretty poo poo and then my dad had the idea to load the front of it with fishing line weights so that it would build momentum as it went downward. I don't remember how that worked out. I didn't win. Knot tying, one of the scout leaders was demonstrating knots, and then made a noose and gave us a poo poo-eating grin. It was until I was in my 30s that I realized he was being racist. My last day, the kid who said his mom blew my dad, and his friend decided it would be hilarious to hold me down and whip my butt with a switch over and over again. When they let me go, I was bawling and just ran all the way home, which was pretty far. The Scoutmaster brought them INTO MY HOUSE (and my parents let them in!) and made them apologize to me while I was still crying. So the most homoerotic thing that happened to me in the scouts was at least kids my own age, and not an adult, so... win? EDIT: Oh poo poo, I almost forgot, my second year I wasn't a cub scout, I was a "weeblo," pronounced "we blow." Yeah, no wonder the organization has sexual assault problems.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:03
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I want to see the scoutmaster who loathes video games fight the racist knottying scoutmaster in a grimy basement knifefight
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Feb 19, 2020 03:09
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Anyone remember what the gently caress Kira or Akira was in cub scouts? I remember some weird ghost wolf you were supposed to obey.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:09
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Are the Mormons still in control of Boy Scouts? Remember seeing a episode on them (Penn and Tellers Bullshit maybe) trying to take over and make them Mormon Lite.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:11
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TOOT BOOT posted:Anyone remember what the gently caress Kira or Akira was in cub scouts? I remember some weird ghost wolf you were supposed to obey. Sounds vaguely familiar but there was an obscene amount of extremely whitebread appropriation of general Native American poo poo
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Feb 19, 2020 03:12
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happyhippy posted:Are the Mormons still in control of Boy Scouts?
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Feb 19, 2020 03:20
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drat I loved the pinewood derby. When I was 10 or 11 I built my own car, but since I was a girl I was absolutely not allowed to race with the other boys my age. This was sacrilege. I had to race it in the family division which was basically all the dads and grandads. Some of them were just racing cars they built as kids for nostalgia. There were also a bunch of scout dads who were way too competitive. I beat all their asses and got first place. One of the dads got really pissy and forbade me from playing with his kids ever again. gently caress Boy Scouts and their lovely culture.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:21
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Sex is expensive, kid sex is the expensivest
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Feb 19, 2020 03:22
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TOOT BOOT posted:Anyone remember what the gently caress Kira or Akira was in cub scouts? I remember some weird ghost wolf you were supposed to obey.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:24
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please dont doxx me
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Feb 19, 2020 03:26
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Yeah that was probably it.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:26
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AuntBuck posted:drat I loved the pinewood derby. When I was 10 or 11 I built my own car, but since I was a girl I was absolutely not allowed to race with the other boys my age. This was sacrilege. I had to race it in the family division which was basically all the dads and grandads. Some of them were just racing cars they built as kids for nostalgia. There were also a bunch of scout dads who were way too competitive. I beat all their asses and got first place. One of the dads got really pissy and forbade me from playing with his kids ever again. gently caress Boy Scouts and their lovely culture. Lol awesome this owns also gently caress those people
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Feb 19, 2020 03:27
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TOOT BOOT posted:Anyone remember what the gently caress Kira or Akira was in cub scouts? I remember some weird ghost wolf you were supposed to obey. I recall this. My handbook had like a cartoon wolf giving tips in the corner of each page or something like that and he had a few pages dedicated specifically to him. I was only a boy scout very briefly but I made a car that looked exactly like this  for the pinewood derby and it was just the lowest effort poo poo ever. I got a tiny trophy because I did not win but no scout ever loses. So basically I lost. Boomers always talk about giving those darn kids participation trophies but I was given a participation trophy by a boomer and not because I asked for one so I don't know what they're always going on about I hope they die soon CJacobs fucked around with this message at 03:31 on Feb 19, 2020 |
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Feb 19, 2020 03:28
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Every activity centered around building virtually anything was inevitably tainted by the dads with Randian levels of competitive urge living vicariously through their children by making their son watch them build something and maybe like use a drill once and then act like their dad only just "helped" when it came time to show off what you made. Of course the kid would rush to take credit anyway so it's like the Boy Scout version of your dad giving you a small loan of a million dollars then claiming you got rich by working hard in the end they were all complicit and to be destroyed.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:31
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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:Every activity centered around building virtually anything was inevitably tainted by the dads with Randian levels of competitive urge living vicariously through their children by making their son watch them build something and maybe like use a drill once and then act like their dad only just "helped" when it came time to show off what you made. Yeah basically. My dad is cool so we worked on my lovely car together and didn't get visibly pissed off when it didn't win first place in the pinewood derby, unlike many other families present.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:33
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I thought Cubs did a lot of Jungle Book things? Scouts Canada about 20 years ago decided to let girls join, and the Scout Troop i was in didn't like that so they folded. So gently caress them, but it was supported by The North British Society which is a fancy name for Rich Scots who like being part of England, so they probably were pretty arch conservative. We did get to wear kilts and do things like carry flags in Canada Day parades and stuff.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:34
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LabyaMynora posted:EDIT: Oh poo poo, I almost forgot, my second year I wasn't a cub scout, I was a "weeblo," pronounced "we blow." Yeah, no wonder the organization has sexual assault problems. I never knew what the gently caress a webelos was supposed to be since the other cub scout ranks were just animal names. Apparently it's a shortening of "We'll be loyal scouts" which is really loving stupid.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:35
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The_Continental posted:Why would anyone join the scouts when you can just get all your knives from BUDK and avoid getting your butthole tongue punched by the assistant P.E teacher. Why would anyone join the scouts when the Catholic church has a less restrictive dress code?
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Feb 19, 2020 03:37
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wizardofloneliness posted:I never knew what the gently caress a webelos was supposed to be since the other cub scout ranks were just animal names. Apparently it's a shortening of "We'll be loyal scouts" which is really loving stupid. It's just a fake word that's supposed to evoke images of those Noble And Wise Native American Tribes, they only pretended that it's an acronym when they got in trouble for being racist for the 1000th time
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Feb 19, 2020 03:38
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CJacobs posted:Yeah basically. My dad is cool so we worked on my lovely car together and didn't get visibly pissed off when it didn't win first place in the pinewood derby, unlike many other families present. My car was a piece of poo poo and I won first place in my troop one year. It was a rough cut wedge spray painted gold with weights on the bottom. It beat out a super slick, very aerodynamic car with a great paint job and smooth laquer finish. It loving ruled. Edit i didnt see this post but it's great AuntBuck posted:drat I loved the pinewood derby. When I was 10 or 11 I built my own car, but since I was a girl I was absolutely not allowed to race with the other boys my age. This was sacrilege. I had to race it in the family division which was basically all the dads and grandads. Some of them were just racing cars they built as kids for nostalgia. There were also a bunch of scout dads who were way too competitive. I beat all their asses and got first place. One of the dads got really pissy and forbade me from playing with his kids ever again. gently caress Boy Scouts and their lovely culture. Whooping Crabs fucked around with this message at 03:48 on Feb 19, 2020 |
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Feb 19, 2020 03:45
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CJacobs posted:It's just a fake word that's supposed to evoke images of those Noble And Wise Native American Tribes, they only pretended that it's an acronym when they got in trouble for being racist for the 1000th time That makes sense. It always sounded like a fake animal name to me, like some sort of gazelle or something. Girl Scout names are much more sensible: Daisy, Brownie, Junior, Senior, none of this made up nonsense.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:46
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Whooping Crabs posted:My car was a piece of poo poo and I won first place in my troop one year. It was a rough cut wedge spray painted gold with weights on the bottom. It beat out a super slick, very aerodynamic car with a great paint job and smooth laquer finish. It loving ruled. Most of the cars that won were some normal rear end looking poo poo done with the right materials and someone who focused on the basic physics of an object rolling down a slope instead of the overwrought nightmares that tried to reduce drag.
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Feb 19, 2020 03:47
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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:Most of the cars that won were some normal rear end looking poo poo done with the right materials and someone who focused on the basic physics of an object rolling down a slope instead of the overwrought nightmares that tried to reduce drag. Also a shitload of graphite on the axles
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Feb 19, 2020 03:53
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Statutory Ape posted:it would be cool if there were organizations like the scouts but not tied to weird gender stereotypes and rape It has its own issues but cadets is a really good program for that sort of thing, at least up here in Canada. It costs absolutely nothing so there's no barrier for entry other than wanting to be there. Everything is supplied by the DND so it let us poor kids do stuff we'd never get a chance to do otherwise, like sailing, band, biathlon, or even learning how to fly a plane. Going to summer camp in BC was the first time I was ever in an airplane, and flying across the country in a C130 Hercules was loving awesome. On top of all the cool poo poo you get to do, you get paid a weekly salary for going to summer camp. The most valuable thing though is the leadership and mentoring skills they give you, which has probably helped me out more than anything else in my professional life, and I know plenty of other people who have benefited similarly from what they've learned. Also, there's no pressure to join the military afterwards, and I didn't find it very jingoistic (although I was in the program before 9/11, it's possible that's since changed).
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Feb 19, 2020 03:55
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the american version of that would be teaching kids how to do a bomb run with a drone then they'd tell you that you get to sword fight dragons
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Feb 19, 2020 03:56
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I was in cub scouts for like two weeks cause I thought "oh hell yeah carving wood and starting fires is a skill I should have" and we went to the first session where they seemed really boring and said next week wed have a homemade miniboat race. Well I built a boat and crushed the competition until it was me and the scoutmasters kid and he ruled a cub scout wasnt allowed to compete for first place so he just gave me a second place medal and my dad and I agreed this sucked and to never return.
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Feb 19, 2020 04:07
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CJacobs posted:Boomers always talk about giving those darn kids participation trophies but I was given a participation trophy by a boomer and not because I asked for one so I don't know what they're always going on about I hope they die soon Check out the "things Boomers like" thread, it's full of this content. wizardofloneliness posted:I never knew what the gently caress a webelos was supposed to be since the other cub scout ranks were just animal names. Apparently it's a shortening of "We'll be loyal scouts" which is really loving stupid. That's loving hilarious. How does "We'll be loyal scouts" become "webelo?" It definitely feels like the type of thing were some came up with the word first, and then tried to retroactively make it a portmanteau. Sick fucks just wanted a bunch of 10-year-old boys running around saying, "Webelo! Webelo!" until it became, "We blow! We blow!"
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Feb 19, 2020 04:11
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Does Webelo accept weeabos?
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Feb 19, 2020 04:16
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If the scouts were run by Mormons they'd have billions in the back rn 
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Feb 19, 2020 04:32
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EorayMel posted:I want to see the scoutmaster who loathes video games fight the racist knottying scoutmaster in a grimy basement knifefight The first rule of Scoutmaster Club is don't talk about all the furious gay sex. The second rule of Scoutmaster Club is have lots of furious gay sex!
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Feb 19, 2020 04:39
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My scout master was the creepiest DEA agent and I'm just glad I was too obnoxious a kid to catch his fancy. Would explain why the other kids in the troop were so hosed up though.
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Feb 19, 2020 04:41
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RocktheCaulk posted:My scout master was the creepiest DEA agent and I'm just glad I was too obnoxious a kid to catch his fancy. Would explain why the other kids in the troop were so hosed up though. 
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Feb 19, 2020 04:43
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Pretty close, just make him much more Greek/Italian looking and 5' 2''
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Feb 19, 2020 04:45
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I also mainly remember the other dad's all being insane about SCOUTING. One flipped out on me when I didn't physically get inside the fireplace / chimney on a ski trip to sweep it out.
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Feb 19, 2020 04:48
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RocktheCaulk posted:Pretty close, just make him much more Greek/Italian looking and 5' 2'' Now that you mention it, I had a creepy "scout volunteer" who was really involved with the Jaycees(John Wayne Gacy's main volunteer organization) that would orbit the scout troop I was in. I don't know if anyone every accused him of anything, but he skeeved enough of us out to have us all on edge wen he was around.
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Feb 19, 2020 04:49
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Rad-daddio posted:Now that you mention it, I had a creepy "scout volunteer" who was really involved with the Jaycees(John Wayne Gacy's main volunteer organization) that would orbit the scout troop I was in. This was my uncle, who died for Nintendo
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Feb 19, 2020 04:50
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Went all the way up to Life Scout (rank below Eagle) before I hit 18 and was booted out after many years of campfire chili, Risk games, and occasional merit badges. The largest lie ever told to me was that having "Eagle Scout" on my resume would for sure land me any job I ever applied for.
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Feb 19, 2020 04:55
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Rad-daddio posted:Now that you mention it, I had a creepy "scout volunteer" who was really involved with the Jaycees(John Wayne Gacy's main volunteer organization) that would orbit the scout troop I was in. My creepy scout master always had his "friend" on the trip with him who was less creepy but they were probably a couple looking back.
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Feb 19, 2020 04:59
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RocktheCaulk posted:My creepy scout master always had his "friend" on the trip with him who was less creepy but they were probably a couple looking back. Brokeback Scoutcamp?
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Feb 19, 2020 05:08
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symbolic posted:Went all the way up to Life Scout (rank below Eagle) before I hit 18 and was booted out after many years of campfire chili, Risk games, and occasional merit badges. The largest lie ever told to me was that having "Eagle Scout" on my resume would for sure land me any job I ever applied for. The people who believe this, like my dad, have never done it, were never eagle scouts in the first place (with a few exceptions), and probably haven't had to apply for a job in decades.
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Feb 19, 2020 05:14
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