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I once farted so hard, it awoke the Eldergods and darkness engulfed the earth.
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Feb 23, 2020 23:51
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| # ? Apr 23, 2024 12:16 |
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The fun new virus that's taking the world by storm, COVID19, is notable for how it can be spread through farts. That's not even a joke, Japan had to publish a PSA telling people to wear durable pants to limit the spread of this fart-born disease This means that someone, somewhere, has definitely killed a person by farting on them.
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Feb 24, 2020 00:01
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smoobles posted:It's been itchy cuz I'm away from my bidet this weekend, sadly Wipe your rear end.
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Feb 24, 2020 03:53
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Mine is currently being tongue punched by the mrs
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Feb 24, 2020 04:03
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made a great many posts on this website
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Feb 24, 2020 04:04
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I had norovirus once. After the vomiting and diarrhea ended, I had HUGE amounts of gas, and the farts became legendary. For 48 hours, every trip to the bathroom resulted in me laughing at the amount of gas I expelled.
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Feb 24, 2020 04:05
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It writes notes everyday, including thisd post
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Feb 24, 2020 04:14
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my anus placed in the bucharest anus open where it scored high marks for pertness, pedigree, and congeniality
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Feb 24, 2020 04:15
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Ordered a burger last night for dinner. Had my lactase pill, still in the wrapper, sitting on the table for when food showed up. The server grabbed the packet, thinking it was trash, and I didn't notice. The burger was there, and I had no more pills. My anus has been releasing demonic sounds and smells all day.
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Feb 24, 2020 05:52
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I once stuck my (ex) girlfriends vibrating dildo thing in my anus and it was very pleased. Washed it off with dish soap and meant to tell her but our relationship ended before i could, maybe shes still using it to this day idunno
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Feb 24, 2020 06:00
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i once tried to teach it how to talk... that didn't work out too well.
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Feb 25, 2020 16:04
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My "anus" as you so rudely called it, wakes me up daily at 5:30 for a poop. I haven't set an alarm in years. Please apologize to my timekeeping rear end in a top hat.
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Feb 25, 2020 16:44
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and that anus's name? Albert Einstein.
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Feb 25, 2020 17:34
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A few weeks ago I farted one continuous fart for 10 seconds.
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Feb 25, 2020 19:09
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I was cuddling with my wife one day and I farted and she threw up in bed.
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Feb 25, 2020 20:52
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 I remembered this piece of an article from InQuest magazine some 20+ years ago. And more astonishingly, someone had posted it.
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Feb 25, 2020 21:17
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It's like a stab in the back when your own hemorrhoid gets so big it completely obstructs your b-hole. You don't mess with your own ability to poo poo, man.
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Feb 25, 2020 23:01
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i plugged up the toilet yesterday. then i had to put the plunger deep into this fetid mass of muddy shitwater, it was horrible. it caused me to throw up a little bit, then a little bit more once I put my face closer to the toilet. this all happened about five minutes after waking up too, not the way I prefer to start my day if im honest
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Feb 26, 2020 00:38
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Play posted:i plugged up the toilet yesterday. then i had to put the plunger deep into this fetid mass of muddy shitwater, it was horrible. it caused me to throw up a little bit, then a little bit more once I put my face closer to the toilet. this all happened about five minutes after waking up too, not the way I prefer to start my day if im honest Yeah I'd just call in to work and go back to bed
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Feb 26, 2020 00:41
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Genesplicer posted:I had norovirus once. After the vomiting and diarrhea ended, I had HUGE amounts of gas, and the farts became legendary. For 48 hours, every trip to the bathroom resulted in me laughing at the amount of gas I expelled. A true goon a legend
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Feb 26, 2020 00:59
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poverty goat posted:I pooped a little while ago and it slid right out and wiped easy
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Feb 26, 2020 01:02
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The biggest poop of my life baby
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Feb 26, 2020 01:02
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L-laser piss that Turd
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Feb 26, 2020 01:14
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poo poo so big I had to stand up to get off of it
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Feb 26, 2020 01:15
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Turd so big I had post partum depression for a week
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Feb 26, 2020 01:15
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The log was so lethal they hung my boots from a tree
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Feb 26, 2020 01:17
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Spinz posted:Ever? You need to see a doctor right away.
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Feb 26, 2020 01:17
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Farted so bad my alcoholic modern studies teacher told me to see a vet.
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Feb 26, 2020 01:22
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Take a big ol' weiner Also farted so hard it made someone a floor below yell "what the gently caress!"
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Feb 26, 2020 02:12
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It don't matter when it's Arcturiun baby
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Feb 26, 2020 02:57
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Provided years of companionship and fun, and will ultimately provide weeks worth of delicious meals for my family e: sorry thought it said angus, please ignore
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Feb 26, 2020 03:58
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made your parents get divorced
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Feb 26, 2020 04:33
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Not me, but a very close friend of mine once farted, and put it out on the internet. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tk-5RVMerfI My arse was once signed by the horn section of the 90s Australian punk band Nancy Vandal, but that is more something that was done to it rather than it did itself.
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Feb 26, 2020 06:19
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Disco Pope posted:Farted so bad my alcoholic modern studies teacher told me to see a vet. lol
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Feb 26, 2020 06:47
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Sometimes when I poop, I use the shaping attachment from my old Play Doh fun set. I place it on my anus, and make poops in different shapes. There's nothing strange about that at all. I'm an American, living in America, and if I want to have poops shaped like stars, I have every right to. The founding fathers would have wanted it that way.
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Feb 26, 2020 06:52
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Aishlinn posted:
Wait, what the hell is this game and how can I play it right this very day?
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Feb 26, 2020 07:10
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I was pretty impressed with the 2.5cm polyp i just had removed.
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Feb 26, 2020 08:44
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It has birthed 1000 black goats
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Feb 26, 2020 08:47
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HugeGrossBurrito posted:I once farted the first note to beastie boys brass monkey perfectly Hey gently caress you mister, I once tooted out 4 & 1/2 perfect B flats to perform the introduction to this song, unfortunately ran out of "puff" on the crescendo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2mqwM_8IpFA
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Feb 26, 2020 13:42
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I farted in a small closed bathroom when a person was brushing their teeth and they threw up in the sink.
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Feb 27, 2020 01:56
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