Idiots on Social Media: If cum was garlic sauce I'd give way more blowjobs.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > Idiots on Social Media: If cum was garlic sauce I'd give way more blowjobs.

«‹›3192 »

Mak0rz: Aug 2, 2008; 😎🐗🚬

chitoryu12 posted:

https://twitter.com/gaymerpainter/status/1280946594947481604

*at KFC* yeah I'll have a genocide combo with a large fries

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:14

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 29, 2024 07:01

Lottery of Babylon: Apr 25, 2012; STRAIGHT TROPIN'

Mak0rz posted:

*at Chik-fil-A* yeah I'll have a genocide combo with a large fries

The entire virus narrative is a psyop: a social control experiment.

Once everyone is wearing a mask, they will never let you take it off.
Once everyone has a cellphone, they will never let you live without one.
Once everyone is signed up to a 'cashless environment' digital banking service, they will never let you use 'old' forms of money.

Once everyone is wearing gloves, they will never let you take them off, except for when the bank takes your fingerprint to authorize a cashless transaction of non-existent binary money, from one non-existent bank account to another.

Once everyone forgets how to read, they will not teach it to us again.

The Coronavirus is a 'virus' with a crown. It is a Ruling Virus. It has Divine Right to Rule. It is the new Religion. Everyone is being Sanitized. The world is a prison and sanitarium.
The existence of the Coronavirus cannot be proven in a court of law.

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:25

Necrothatcher: Mar 26, 2005

it seems so much more exciting to live in the world of a crazy person

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:32

T-man: Aug 22, 2010; Talk shit, get bzzzt.

Lottery of Babylon posted:

The entire virus narrative is a psyop: a social control experiment.

Once everyone is wearing a mask, they will never let you take it off.
Once everyone has a cellphone, they will never let you live without one.
Once everyone is signed up to a 'cashless environment' digital banking service, they will never let you use 'old' forms of money.

Once everyone is wearing gloves, they will never let you take them off, except for when the bank takes your fingerprint to authorize a cashless transaction of non-existent binary money, from one non-existent bank account to another.

Once everyone forgets how to read, they will not teach it to us again.

The Coronavirus is a 'virus' with a crown. It is a Ruling Virus. It has Divine Right to Rule. It is the new Religion. Everyone is being Sanitized. The world is a prison and sanitarium.
The existence of the Coronavirus cannot be proven in a court of law.

holding down the "tell me more" button

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:37

captainOrbital: Jan 23, 2003; Wrathchild!
💢🧒

Necrothatcher posted:

it seems so much more exciting to live in the world of a crazy person

It's not so much exciting as it is making sense. hear me out...

I was just going to hit submit reply at this point bc it would be funnier, but. Some people like to live in a world where everything happens for a reason.

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:37

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

RareAcumen posted:

https://twitter.com/luulubuu/status/1280522579200167938

Red delicious apples.

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:48

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

RareAcumen posted:

https://twitter.com/luulubuu/status/1280522579200167938

Fun fact, Oranges aren't named for their color, the color is named for the fruit. Stuff that color was mostly described as red before the fruit was widely available in the English speaking world.

# ? Jul 8, 2020 21:55

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

OwlFancier posted:

It's a shame "I can use google and figure out how to do a thing if I don't already know how to do it" is not a substitute for qualifications on a CV, despite being the better answer.

Yup. Like, you're asked about analysis of algorithms in a whiteboard interview, and the proper answer is "Okay, first I use a class library, and second if I HAVE to do it myself I look it up in Knuth, because what am I, a timewaster?" (Yes, Knuth is in this weird pseudo-machine-code, but still.)

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:10

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

RareAcumen posted:

https://twitter.com/luulubuu/status/1280522579200167938

https://mobile.twitter.com/FirionsNipples/status/1280635519240634374

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:22

Nea: Feb 28, 2014; Funny Little Guy Aficionado.

T-man posted:

it's pretty IoSM that we're getting bought by a bitcoin millionaire tho

is jeffery yospos a bitcoin millionaire?? ?or is this a bit????

I ask because normally i'd assume the latter but it seems plausible

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:34

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

BRANDON: ?

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:35

Tenebrais: Sep 2, 2011

Nea posted:

is jeffery yospos a bitcoin millionaire?? ?or is this a bit????

I ask because normally i'd assume the latter but it seems plausible

It's an unsubstantiated rumour turned running gag.

So naturally it's 1000% true.

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:35

Nea: Feb 28, 2014; Funny Little Guy Aficionado.

I see.

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:37

Arivia: Mar 17, 2011

Tenebrais posted:

It's an unsubstantiated rumour turned running gag.

So naturally it's 1000% true.

well, since this all went down, the unknown owner of the world's largest single bitcoin wallet, did withdraw $50 million. that sounds about right to get rich kyanka paid off and sort the place out with the IRS so :tinfoil:

Arivia has a new favorite as of 22:42 on Jul 8, 2020

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:38

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

https://twitter.com/dappergander/status/1280975338382778374?s=20

# ? Jul 8, 2020 22:51

Len: Jan 21, 2008; Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!

OwlFancier posted:

It's a shame "I can use google and figure out how to do a thing if I don't already know how to do it" is not a substitute for qualifications on a CV, despite being the better answer.

When I had to take statistics for my major the professor lett us have notes during the exams because "if you end up in a lab doing this for real you'll have a computer do it all for you and you'll never use this math again" and that was the best I've ever done in math.

Len has a new favorite as of 23:48 on Jul 8, 2020

# ? Jul 8, 2020 23:42

MizPiz: May 29, 2013; by Athanatos

Skwirl posted:

https://twitter.com/dappergander/status/1280975338382778374?s=20

The only way to stop bad pedophiles raping children is with good pedophiles raping children

# ? Jul 8, 2020 23:45

Shithouse Dave: Aug 5, 2007; each post manufactured to the highest specifications

This was too long for a screenshot but enjoy this absolutely tone deaf handwringing

idiot on Facebook posted:

This is an eye opener to how lucky we are here in New Zealand.

Wow. Bloodbath out there..

If your company is still operating, be very grateful!

WHY?

1. Victoria's Secret declared bankruptcy.
2. Zara closed 1,200 stores.
3. La Chapelle withdrew 4391 stores.
4. Chanel is discontinued.
5. Hermes is discontinued.
6. Patek Philippe discontinued production.
7. Rolex discontinued production.
8. The world's luxury industry has crumpled.
9. Nike has a total of $23 billion US dollars preparing for the second stage of layoffs.
10. Gold's gym filed for bankruptcy
11. The founder of AirBnb said that because of pandemic, 12 years of efforts were destroyed in 6 weeks.
12. Even Starbucks also announced to permanently close their 400 stores.
13. Prada closed 127 stores worldwide.
14. Domino�s Pizza closed 553 stores worldwide, announcing a $833 million dollar loss.
15. Anglo American - South Africa retrenched over 1800 staff members.
16. Harrods - London lost over �1 billion in 90 days.
17. Flight Centre closes 117 branches in Africa.
18. Pentravel closes 32 branches in South Africa.
19. Worldwide there is a job loss of over 900 million jobs.
20. Africa will suffer the most. Unfortunately, the worst is yet to come for the forgotten continent.

Under the weight of the new crown pandemic, many giants are facing the crisis of failure. Five months of pandemic created a LOT of debt, and tens of thousands of companies went bankrupt, so the company was seriously replaced.

If your company is still there, and there are no major pay cuts or layoffs, please treat your company well, because they are carrying all the tests that you can't see and humans are facing the pandemic that cannot be controlled. The second half of 2020, is the challenge of corporate strength.

I remember Robert Kiyosaki said that he prefers to invest in smaller businesses because whenever crisis happens, the first to collapse will be those big companies and brands.

BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT ROBERT KIYOSAKI ALSO SAID?
He said: "The richest people in the world look for and build networks, everyone else looks for work"

2020 is about survival and about those who can Hustle, will manage to achieve unparalleled heights this year too!

#copiedpost

Shithouse Dave has a new favorite as of 23:57 on Jul 8, 2020

# ? Jul 8, 2020 23:55

Stunt_enby: Feb 6, 2010; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

GrandpaPants posted:

I think any and all bootlicking is IOSM. ACAB.

now reread the post you're getting mad at. pay attention to the signs. what acronyms might one form from the slogans on them?

# ? Jul 8, 2020 23:59

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

Len posted:

When I had to take statistics for my major the professor lett us have notes during the exams because "if you end up in a lab doing this for real you'll have a computer do it all for you and you'll never use this math again" and that was the best I've ever done in math.

I imagine it�s still helpful to know what the computer is doing and why

# ? Jul 9, 2020 00:37

Boywhiz88: Sep 11, 2005; floating 26" off da ground. BURR!

Shithouse Dave posted:

This was too long for a screenshot but enjoy this absolutely tone deaf handwringing

P sure this is fake as gently caress. I tried Googling that Chanel thing and could only find a bullshit article w the same info as the post.

# ? Jul 9, 2020 01:17

Mak0rz: Aug 2, 2008; 😎🐗🚬

christmas boots posted:

I imagine it’s still helpful to know what the computer is doing and why

Yeah I took that approach in college and then when I went to grad school working under a quantitative ecologist I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.

Why did I use generalized mixed linear models? No idea! I don't even know what those are!

Thankfully I had a computer do all the work so I still managed to complete the thesis/degree :v:

# ? Jul 9, 2020 01:21

Len: Jan 21, 2008; Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!

christmas boots posted:

I imagine it’s still helpful to know what the computer is doing and why

Yeah but rather than expect us to remember all the formulas and poo poo we could go into the exams with them written down. I'm doing nothing with my psych degree and quantitative methods was over a decade ago but I did better at that than any of the ones where I was just expected to keep everything in line. But I've never been great at math and related courses

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:12

Biplane: Jul 18, 2005

Notes are just external memories. Checkmate professor :smug:

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:19

Inceltown: Aug 6, 2019

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:26

Pththya-lyi: Nov 8, 2009; THUNDERDOME LOSER 2020

Socrates was right, writing stuff down instead of committing it to memory is just an intellectual crutch

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:29

Data Graham: Dec 28, 2009; 📈📊🍪😋

ACAB *releases army of antifa moles*

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:33

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

I loving wish I had all the powers people associate with Antifa.

Eating hella expensive avocado toast with my George Soros checks while using bees and weasels to bash the fash.

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:37

Pththya-lyi: Nov 8, 2009; THUNDERDOME LOSER 2020

I'm a level 2 antifa, how long until I can summon a bear?

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:40

SneezeOfTheDecade: Feb 6, 2011; gettin' covid all
over your posts

Pththya-lyi posted:

I'm a level 2 antifa, how long until I can summon a bear?

One more, you get to subclass at level 3 and Beast Mastery is one of the options.

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:43

GlobglogGroAbgalab: Jul 25, 2016; It appears that the elephant is highly sensitive to the effects of LSD - a finding which may prove to be valuable in elephant-control work in Africa.

Do Muslims still incur a penalty for acting against racially determined alignment?

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:46

stringless: Dec 28, 2005; keyboard ⌨️ cowboy

Stuntman posted:

now reread the post you're getting mad at. pay attention to the signs. what acronyms might one form from the slogans on them?

everyone sees what the sign says, no one here read that sign and went "definitely says Prineville" as their first instinct

# ? Jul 9, 2020 02:50

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

gently caress your "Birds are Christian animals." show me your "socialist teeth."

https://twitter.com/aqueerwolf/status/1281004910759292928?s=20

# ? Jul 9, 2020 03:26

StillFullyTerrible: Feb 16, 2020; you should have left Let's Play open for public view, Lowtax

look at these terrifying socialist teeth

# ? Jul 9, 2020 03:39

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

https://twitter.com/DrewPells/status/1281044172246564873

# ? Jul 9, 2020 03:40

wizzardstaff: Apr 6, 2018; Zorch! Splat! Pow!

Skwirl posted:

gently caress your "Birds are Christian animals." show me your "socialist teeth."

Soyboy mouth is so last season.

# ? Jul 9, 2020 03:42

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

ultrafilter posted:

https://twitter.com/DrewPells/status/1281044172246564873

I know that's soccer, but I with them reopening training camps I bet the MLB is going to be having some "I can't breathe" moments themselves in the near future.

# ? Jul 9, 2020 03:43

Mak0rz: Aug 2, 2008; 😎🐗🚬

ultrafilter posted:

https://twitter.com/DrewPells/status/1281044172246564873

Might as well because I can't see this one staying up for long

# ? Jul 9, 2020 03:56

EL BROMANCE: Jun 10, 2006; COWABUNGA DUDES!
🥷🐢😬

Reyes got hit in the throat by mistake, and is suffering horribly. Thank god nobody has had to go through that for say, 8 odd minutes.

E: lol he has a press pass. He won�t again.

EL BROMANCE has a new favorite as of 04:46 on Jul 9, 2020

# ? Jul 9, 2020 04:32

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 29, 2024 07:01

Doc Hawkins: Jun 15, 2010; Dashing? But I'm not even moving!

https://twitter.com/BillKristol/status/1280324333177581568

https://twitter.com/TrueAnonPod/status/1281069331879583744

# ? Jul 9, 2020 04:41

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > Idiots on Social Media: If cum was garlic sauce I'd give way more blowjobs.

«‹›3192 »