Idiots on Social Media: If cum was garlic sauce I'd give way more blowjobs.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > Idiots on Social Media: If cum was garlic sauce I'd give way more blowjobs.

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Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

oldpainless posted:

I disagree. My wife and I were both victims and she felt terrified in our own house for awhile thinking they would return while she was home alone.

Cops don't usually return to the scene of the crime.

# ¿ Jun 9, 2020 03:40

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 13:55

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Just a heads up, I'm hearing that there are a bunch of videos going around social media today with poo poo like cat pictures interspersed with serious gore, so be cautious as you trawl around for thread content.

# ¿ Sep 7, 2020 18:43

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Frog Act posted:

You can tell which pictures these are because they’ll flash their headlights at you as part of their gang initiation

No, apparently a guy ended his life on tiktok last night, and people are blind sharing it.

# ¿ Sep 8, 2020 01:22

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Arsenic Lupin posted:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/377947866641485824

Nice of him to include the military.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2020 20:28

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

there wolf posted:

Tartans are one of the best examples of negative cultural appropriation. Scots did make and wear tartans maybe even going back to before Roman times, and different patterns may have had different regional associations which may have been starting to turn to clan/military associations during the 18th century. Then the English passed a law banning tartan (and other Gaelic customs) as a way to suppress Scottish independence during the Jacobite rebellions.Then forty years later after the Jacobites imploded, the law was repealed after a bunch of rich fucks in London lobbied for it, leading to it becoming a fashionable craze with spawned the whole false history with clan tartans and all that stuff.

So the Scots had a product of their culture, the tartan, banned by the English as a direct attack on their cultural identity as Scots. Then when the threat of Scottish rebellions was gone, the English brought Tartans back and invented a whole fanciful history for them that flattered the English image of highland Scots and their culture.

At what point does that, itself, become historical culture though? Like sure, Clan MacGobshite decided that pattern was their "Clan Tartan" in like 1830, but it's been a couple centuries and they've been consistent with it.

# ¿ Sep 30, 2020 05:43

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

OwlFancier posted:

Uh, what is "british style" in this instance because we loving love tomato ketchup over here.

We particularly like putting it on chips, which as you know are made from the native british potato. We might even put the chips in a sandwich, bread being invented in doncaster in 1843.

Like what does he eat, just haggis?

I promise you that you have now put more thought into this than he has.

# ¿ Oct 17, 2020 00:58

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

oldpainless posted:

How about

humans?

More like oldraceless

# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 05:04

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Poor Miserable Gurgi posted:

Your reading and their's aren't that different, just the point at which Deckard becomes disillusioned with the system. It's still about contemplating what makes who human. Which is actually a fairly cyberpunk idea.

The real issue a lot of folks arguing about the game don't seem to get is that genre and rigid adherence to what makes a story "cyberpunk" or "technoir" is all bullshit and more about selling poo poo than actually engaging with narrative. Nothing is going to be clear cut, and I don't think Gibson sat down to write Neuromancer and thought "I'm going to write a cyberpunk story". It's only useful in retrospect and from the critic's side.

That said, CD Projekt Red obviously didn't understand much of the broader history of what they were working on, and mostly seemed to go based on aesthetics and the mechanics of an RPG without knowing why they existed in the first place.

CDPR seemed to base everything on modern aesthetics and Mike Pondsmith's original setting thoughts, which were created during a time period where I feel the police were viewed more as a resource exploited by corporate fascism, rather than being a fascist power block in their own right.
Not to say it was correct, but it was the overall feeling in media at the time.

# ¿ Dec 22, 2020 02:57

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

BaldDwarfOnPCP posted:

Punk is a word that has been used to describe a victim of sexual abuse.

It was taken back in many ways. Gutter punk, street punk, even trust fund idiots doing crust punk.

To be called a punk in the system is still very homophobic but it's something that people take back.

Cyberpunk as a term is dead as dirt because we're living in that world, we just get punked by corporations and governments.

There's a reason Gibson refers to himself as a 'speculative fiction' author now.

Most of the worst poo poo has come true or soon will be.

Is this an LoB gimmick or

# ¿ Dec 23, 2020 08:18

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

FFT posted:

Speaking as a dude, I gave Mane 'n Tail a shot once my hair got past my shoulders and if I ever let it get that long again I'll go right back to Mane 'n Tail 'n a heartbeat. The result is luxurious.

For real. I'm a dude with long hair, mane n tail showed up in my shower after my wife bought some, and it's incredible.
Works well on the dogs, too.

# ¿ Feb 1, 2021 05:26

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Data Graham posted:

Why do they always act like "debate" is some kind of doomsday weapon

Because it's the only weapon they have, so it needs to be powerful to sustain any sense of self they have.
They also have to ignore that they're choosing to use the word "debate" to mean "talk at someone until they get bored and walk away".

# ¿ Feb 23, 2021 03:50

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Woozie66 posted:

As a bi, yup.

Trans people are in a rough spot too. The argument Glen cites that "lesbians are dwindling because they just declare themselves trans" is so so infuriating. Gender identity and sexual attraction are two different things!!! Plus, lesbians "gain" members who are trans!

Wait

Transphobes are now admitting that trans men exist and the whole "trans thing" isn't a ploy by creepy men to get into women's bathrooms and dominate women's sports?

Nah I'm just kidding I know they can handle a myriad of contradictory wrong opinions at any given time.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2021 02:41

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Karia posted:

But how? Potatoes don't have ribs, ergo after god created the male potato he couldn't have made the female potato. Checkmate, thiests.

For potatoes, god used an eye, obviously.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2021 21:52

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Jr. posted:

Battery ruptures, engulfing the cabin with flames and hydrogen fluoride smoke so quickly that even the panel gaps can't vent it out, and the terrified driver can only claw helplessly at the door in horror until his body fails, in a sealed tomb of chemical fire

He should've called customer service! They still make great cars!!

e: this was also posted in the PYF unnerving article thread, and may not even be the same melted tesla

A man died in a burning Tesla because its futuristic doors wouldn’t open, lawsuit alleges

I'm going to guess it's a different one, as the person is actively tweeting that his tesla burned up two months ago and not a year and a half ago, and the owner appears to not be dead?

# ¿ Mar 7, 2021 06:22

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Jr. posted:

Yeah you're right. Still cracks me up that "melted into an empty frame" is an acceptable failure mode for Tesla people

Not only that, but "melted into an empty frame" and "still waiting for them to accept culpability" can't fight the brand loyalty, what the gently caress.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2021 06:32

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Arsenic Lupin posted:

https://twitter.com/beep/status/1384896370251808769

Wrong thread? That seems pretty cool.

# ¿ Apr 21, 2021 17:10

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

From what I was reading somewhere, NFTs started as a video game thing (based in NFTs) where you could prove you owned the digital asset.
So like even stupider than we thought. I'm surprised the star citizen people aren't in on it.

# ¿ Apr 28, 2021 01:07

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Skwirl posted:

https://twitter.com/DCLBlogger/status/1407527416172449792?s=20

I found the above tweet because Bruce Sterling retweeted it, I'd link to it, but his account is protected, I don't think he'd mind me sharing his comment though. You can just follow him and if you're obviously not a bot he (or more likely an assistant) should add you manually within a couple days. https://twitter.com/bruces

You should probably just share his comment in a screenshot if you don't think he would mind you sharing it.

# ¿ Jun 23, 2021 06:00

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Skwirl posted:

She seems to have an American accent, so yeah, probably an idiot. But how many Americans know the difference between Sunni and Shia Muslims? Or the conflicts between Arabs and Persians?

I mean, the first tag in the video they're responding to is #ireland and they lead with "I don't know what part of the world this is," so

# ¿ Jun 27, 2021 07:15

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Skwirl posted:

Adults who give a poo poo about Disneyland beyond "my kids will have fun if I take them there" are the weirdest loving people.

Epcot is the coolest adult theme park on the planet, but yeah Disney People are loving weird.

# ¿ Jul 5, 2021 00:49

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

FFT posted:

At least in the US, just get actual butter at the grocery store. It's on the controlled shortlist where if it's labelled as butter it has to actually just be butter of various levels of saltedness.

Just get unsalted butter and throw most of it in the freezer, it keeps forever that way.

If you can find it, Calma Amish butter is pretty great. Comes in a one pound brick. The label is in polish, so it's easy to spot. I use standard grocery store sticks of butter for baking, and the Amish stuff for anything where the flavor of the butter matters more than the exact quantity.
http://www.calmaoptimal.com/Calma%20products.htm

# ¿ Jul 11, 2021 17:45

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

One time a person in my dnd group thought we should post up a camera and publish our sessions because we were so cool and witty just like critical role, and we had to take turns explaining the various levels of why that idea wouldn't work. Podcasts are poison catnip to a certain kind of person.

# ¿ Sep 2, 2021 05:51

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Martman posted:

why, do y'all use a lot of slurs or something?

No, it just turns out that a DND game with a bunch of drunk suburban assholes that's 60% inside jokes isn't entertaining to anyone but them.
Also, a single camera mounted somewhere around the table is going to look and sound like absolute dog poo poo.

# ¿ Sep 3, 2021 01:19

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

CharlestheHammer posted:

I mean despite this weird turn getting successful off a D&D campaign actually isn’t that unlikely. Depending on how you define sucessful.

Feels like a time when the thread is a bit divorces from reality

It really is super unlikely. Think about how many d&d campaigns there have been vs how many have been translated into commercial success since like 1985. Its what, like 100,000,000 to 50?
My group recently finished a game that had a good narrative, incredible character growth, and wonderful interactions between both players and characters that ran for three years and emotionally impacted us hard when it was done, and it would have been boring as hell to anyone not in the group if we published it in any way.

# ¿ Sep 3, 2021 06:40

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Everyone I ever heard talking about "the jab" prior to Covid was a heroin addict near Chicago talking about heroin.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2021 01:56

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Yeah that was pretty great.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2021 03:44

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

HenryJLittlefinger posted:

Can we do dicks out for harbie still?

Not in front of the kids at the zoo, no.

# ¿ Oct 13, 2021 02:19

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Skwirl posted:

Black Panther is a movie where the CIA helps reinstate a lawfully deposed ruler in exchange for mineral rights and to prevent oppressed minorities worldwide from having material means to stand up against their oppression. And we're supposed to cheer this on.

Well sure, but th CIA is portrayed by a charismatic British guy, and they've surely never done anything reprehensible in Africa. Can't you see that they needed to back the dictator and help him resume power in order to preserve the stability of the region and world peace?

# ¿ Oct 25, 2021 02:31

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Ellie Trashcakes posted:

That's just a prepaid debit card you turnip

Hmm yes this seems well run.

Shopping with Prezzy card is much the same as shipping with a credit card.

# ¿ Nov 19, 2021 01:59

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

nurmie posted:

lmao how is this so bad on so many levels

recording quality aside - and yeah it does sound like it's been recorded in a living room on a zoom from a distance of 5 metres, which *can* work with some songs/genres/vocalists but certaintly doesn't with this one - she's just not a very good singer. what's worse though, she runs headfirst into an issue that plagues many a musician with mediocre technical ability (full disclosure - i'm also a musician with mediocre technical ability ) - i don't think she *knows* she's mediocre. at least that's the vibe i'm getting from how she flaunts her vibrato, drenching every single note in what amounts to musical mud

like, she doesn't even try to work around her limited technique, or actually use it to better express the emotional content of the song (as many brilliant singers with limited technical ability can do). there isn't much dynamic range or nuanced expression going on - she just belches out every single note in all caps, full vibrato, because as we all know the louder you sing the more EMOTIVE you are. it's just not very tasteful, imo

Outside of tortured vibrato, it feels like musical poisoning. Like live musicals. Not understanding that you have to really belt that out to be heard and understood unmicced across an entire theater, and it's not good for any other kind of performance.

# ¿ Dec 8, 2021 07:35

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Greg Graffin has a PhD and taught at UCLA. Punk tends to be the genre with the most (and least) educated people.

# ¿ Dec 17, 2021 03:56

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Baron von Eevl posted:

Yeah but he also got caught jerking off on webcam with a fan so maybe he's educated but not bright.

Wait what?

# ¿ Dec 17, 2021 04:09

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Obligatory

# ¿ Dec 17, 2021 07:47

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

My son just turned three. Had the chat with my spouse tonight about "what are we going to tell him about Santa?"
My opinion is to keep the magic until he has questions, and then a frank discussion that includes not spoiling things for other kids, because there's no reason to be unkind about inconsequential poo poo that makes other people happy.
He believes Daniel Tiger is real and Fred Rogers is his very much alive friend, and I'm not going to intentionally disabuse him about those either, he'll figure it out when he's ready.

The Saddest Rhino posted:

I have murdered and dethroned Santa

Lol that just makes you Santa, haven't you see the documentary?

# ¿ Dec 24, 2021 05:59

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Heath posted:

Is there anybody who would point to learning the truth about Santa Claus as a significant formative trauma in their life who isn't just trying to do whatever it is the "Santa is abuse" person is doing?

People with really hosed up parents that used Santa giving gifts or not as a punishment tool, and also poor kids who grew up in really rich areas who could never figure out why Santa was so much nicer to the rear end in a top hat kids down the street that treated them like poo poo?
Poor parenting is the answer, in general, though, yeah.

# ¿ Dec 24, 2021 06:06

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

The Saddest Rhino posted:

You have to put on the coat to become Santa. I have debased and defiled it. It burns in his arctic factory that is set aflame in a blaze kept eternal to allow the world to understand his sins. A punishment for a symbol traumatizing children of all nations ans faiths. Its gaslighting ends now, for I have doused it in gas and lit it. The elves I kept alive for their minds have been ruined by millennia of ununionized slavery under a smiling, crimson - cheeked dictator. They shall never know peace but I am not the person who delivers it. They must wait for the one who is better than me. For I am only one and can only do so much. The fire burns. Christmas is killed. You say "happy holidays" and keep up the new tradition I have minted. You say "Ho Ho Ho" without knowledge that the meme has passed from a love of the yuletide to prostitution to capitalism. Buy a ps5.

I loving love your posting Rhino.

# ¿ Dec 24, 2021 06:17

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

tokin opposition posted:

Back when I was doing trans healthcare referrals it was really loving hard for a dude to get a hysterectomy, even in woke Seattle. I hear there are a few more surgeons willing to do it, but the ghost of ol' hairy benjamin still haunts us.

Buddy of mine had good luck with doctors in Florida of all places. Rolled down there from the Chicago area because doc was worth traveling for and had absolutely no bullshit.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2022 04:57

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

Arsenic Lupin posted:

https://twitter.com/ploughmansfolly/status/1486886372992552966

Does...does this dude know that the regular US (suburban) land parcel in the US is .5 acres, and there's not nearly enough arable land in the US for this to work?
I've answered my own question, haven't I.

# ¿ Jan 29, 2022 06:40

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

I've spent a lot of time reading in bars/pubs/breweries.
Sometimes it's nice to do something you enjoy while paying someone to bring you beer, and jumping into conversations briefly if anything interesting happens.

# ¿ Feb 8, 2022 07:43

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 13:55

Silly Newbie: Jul 25, 2007; How do I?

RFC2324 posted:

did I just have a stroke?

No, you have Parkinson's.

# ¿ Feb 13, 2022 06:00

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