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I've gotten the go ahead from Roth to open up the contest, I'll have the thread up by this evening eastern standard time.
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May 8, 2021 18:56
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reignofevil posted:We love you cranappleberry. We love you and we love wizards so much. Ever wish you were a wizard? That would be, as the the ancient runes say, "sweet af."
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May 8, 2021 19:03
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Who would be a better ůod, Snape or James?
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May 8, 2021 22:30
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I think its an embarrasing and massive L that the Hogwarts staff was shown up by Barty Crouch Jr. being a better teacher than a lot of them, while being in disguise and staying in character as Moody.
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May 9, 2021 18:42
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He's also the most competent villain in the series. The overall plan was stupid but he played his part perfectly, it was his boss who couldn't manage the final blow.
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May 9, 2021 19:59
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Crouch Jr. was for sure the most competent villain in the entire series and it's not even particularly close. If Voldy hadn't been such a prophecy-fixated dweeb Crouch could have easily killed Harry like a dozen times over. Not only did he gain Harry's complete trust and even admiration to an extent, the entire staff bought into his disguise including Dumbledore. We even see a scene of him drinking with staff in Hogsmede which means he was allowed to come and go as he pleased. So even if it had to be Voldemort there was literally nothing stopping Crouch from calling Harry to his office after hours, stupifying him the second he walks through the door, chucking him into Moody's back of holding, and waltzing out the front door to a place he could apparate straight to his master.
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May 9, 2021 21:42
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Sydin posted:Crouch Jr. was for sure the most competent villain in the entire series and it's not even particularly close. If Voldy hadn't been such a prophecy-fixated dweeb Crouch could have easily killed Harry like a dozen times over. Not only did he gain Harry's complete trust and even admiration to an extent, the entire staff bought into his disguise including Dumbledore. We even see a scene of him drinking with staff in Hogsmede which means he was allowed to come and go as he pleased. So even if it had to be Voldemort there was literally nothing stopping Crouch from calling Harry to his office after hours, stupifying him the second he walks through the door, chucking him into Moody's back of holding, and waltzing out the front door to a place he could apparate straight to his master. ...naaaaw, it'll never work. Easier to rig the Wizard NCAA Playoffs
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May 9, 2021 21:44
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Voldemorts plan to make his greatest enemy fight a dragon only had one flaw, he never snuck in to watch.
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May 9, 2021 21:47
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My personal reading which I'm sure was in no way intentional is that Crouch Jr. is just so taken aback by how gullible Harry and the entire Hogwarts staff are, and just how easy it would be to bump off or whisk away his prize, that he figures it's got to be some kind of trick by Dumbledore to make him lower his guard and so he sticks to the longterm plan.
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May 9, 2021 21:48
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Voldemort needed Harry's blood to make himself immune to Lily's mom magic. He didn't want to disintegrate like Quirrel. But consider this: what if Crouch Jr or Lucius or fuckin Draco or anyone just shot Harry dead? Dead Harry can't disintegrate anyone and "blood of the enemy" can be from Flitwick or whoever
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May 9, 2021 22:11
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Voldemort needed Harry's blood to make himself immune to Lily's mom magic. He didn't want to disintegrate like Quirrel. It's a propaganda thing. If Voldemort is to prove to himself and the world that he was never truly beaten, he can't just have one of his goons off Harry. Like, people say Voldemort was dumb, and he was, but it was in a very believable psychological way. A lot of tyrants and serial killers have these kind of...compulsions.
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May 9, 2021 22:18
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Sydin posted:My personal reading which I'm sure was in no way intentional is that Crouch Jr. is just so taken aback by how gullible Harry and the entire Hogwarts staff are, and just how easy it would be to bump off or whisk away his prize, that he figures it's got to be some kind of trick by Dumbledore to make him lower his guard and so he sticks to the longterm plan. Getting increasingly more sarcastic only to have it taken as sincere "Sure lets have the kids fistfight a group of trolls for the next trial." "Great idea Moody, we will write that down next to the stealing eggs from dragons thing"
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May 9, 2021 22:20
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Junkozeyne posted:Getting increasingly more sarcastic only to have it taken as sincere Dumbledore: "Alright, we need to think of some creatures to spice up the hedge maze of death for the third challenge. Any idea?" Crouch Jr: "How about the blast end skrewet things Hagrid made? Their armor reflects all magic and they can take off like a jet engine and smear you into paste. Would be almost impossible to deal with in a confined area like a maze corridor." Dumbledore: "Moody..." Crouch Jr: "Haha, I'm just kidding, of course that'd be too-" Drumbledore: "That's a brilliant idea! Quick Minerva, fetch Hagrid for us!" Mcgonagall: "Right away sir!" Crouch Jr: 
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May 9, 2021 22:32
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Voldemort needed Harry's blood to make himself immune to Lily's mom magic. He didn't want to disintegrate like Quirrel. Tommy was obsessed with defeating Harry and in a way he had to so that he could keep his image as a dictator etc. Harry being alive meant a lot even to the resistance in the 7th book. So it makes sense that he would want Harry's blood so that there's one less barrier between him and killing Harry. It also gives him a way to psychologically intimidate Harry and Dumbledore. Tommy's obsession with self image and having to project power is a common thread between school yard bullies and Dark Lords.
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May 9, 2021 22:37
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Yeah, Voldemort wanting Harry's blood specifically instead of just any random wizard who opposed him during his regime stems from a combination of him trying to game the system and get around Lily's sacrifice, and also to flex on everyone, both his enemies and his followers to prove that he's the biggest, baddest Dark Lord ever. He even straight up admits to the first part when he's addressing the Death Eaters in the graveyard following his resurrection.
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May 9, 2021 23:06
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Voldemort needed Harry's blood to make himself immune to Lily's mom magic. He didn't want to disintegrate like Quirrel. Didn't Harry's mom's magic make him immune to getting shot dead by Voldemort or his cronies? It never got explained much, but that sure seemed like the implication. Voldemort's first killing spell rebounded, and then Quirrel got burned to death for just aggressively grabbing Harry. I guess non-malicious imperio is fine. Kinda weird how the spell that begun the series gets to be vague and mysterious, but the series ends on magic following strict complicated rules. Crouch Jr. could've maybe sabotaged the dragon fight to kill Harry, but I think for the most part they made clear that there were going to be measures and protections to keep any of the kids from dying.
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May 9, 2021 23:43
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reignofevil posted:I've gotten the go ahead from Roth to open up the contest, I'll have the thread up by this evening eastern standard time. Nice. Is there a link to the thread anywhere?
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May 10, 2021 01:01
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Ccs posted:Nice. Is there a link to the thread anywhere? https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3967207
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May 10, 2021 01:36
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Have we considered the possibility that Voldemort came back wrong? That the tactical, manipulative genius who wreaked havoc on the wizard world fifteen years earlier actually lost a whole lot of lateral thinking power when he got turned into a shrimp man, and the idiot king who can't murder a child, of books five, six and seven, is coasting entirely on rep?
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May 10, 2021 01:37
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josh04 posted:Have we considered the possibility that Voldemort came back wrong? That the tactical, manipulative genius who wreaked havoc on the wizard world fifteen years earlier actually lost a whole lot of lateral thinking power when he got turned into a shrimp man, and the idiot king who can't murder a child, of books five, six and seven, is coasting entirely on rep? it turns out that splitting your soul up is kind of a bad idea. makes you smell bad and think like a moron.
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May 10, 2021 01:39
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Jazerus posted:it turns out that splitting your soul up is kind of a bad idea. makes you smell bad and think like a moron. “Even I, Lord Voldemort, who has gone future on the path to immortality than any person...” *pauses suddenly with a vacant look, let’s a giant stream of drool out of the side of his mouth*
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May 10, 2021 01:43
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josh04 posted:Have we considered the possibility that Voldemort came back wrong? That the tactical, manipulative genius who wreaked havoc on the wizard world fifteen years earlier actually lost a whole lot of lateral thinking power when he got turned into a shrimp man, and the idiot king who can't murder a child, of books five, six and seven, is coasting entirely on rep? He also split his soul more times than anyone else in recorded history, and part of him got all tangled up in Harry’s soul, too, so it would be believable that he became a lot more unstable than he was back in his prime. He’s obviously still got the smarts to be a fierce wizard, but he’s also probably much more vicious, impulsive, etc. than he was back then, and he starts trying to brute force anything that poses an obstacle to him.
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May 10, 2021 01:45
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Speaking of Voldemort, the movie version is not at all how I pictured him, but holy poo poo he rules in his own way. Naked cackling blue guy. Loves killing kids and being evil. He's amazing.
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May 10, 2021 01:52
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUBFN8KUrOc Harry Potter is dead! Huehuehue!
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May 10, 2021 01:56
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rAzjEDIyEI
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May 10, 2021 02:21
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Sydin posted:Dumbledore: "Alright, we need to think of some creatures to spice up the hedge maze of death for the third challenge. Any idea?" To be fair Dumbledore probably asked Hagrid to breed him some hosed up monsters specially for the maze.
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May 10, 2021 02:45
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  kissing cousins with photoshopping my little ponies into the holocaust. continuing to beg people to read another book unless they want these brainworms.
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May 10, 2021 03:06
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May 10, 2021 03:09
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Sydin posted:Dumbledore: "Alright, we need to think of some creatures to spice up the hedge maze of death for the third challenge. Any idea?" You are Carl Kinsella AICMFP.
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May 10, 2021 03:18
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Ror posted:
Uh, this is the exact opposite of the My Little Pony thing though? The My Little Pony picture is insane and hosed up because someone has to photoshop a cartoon pony into a picture before they really understood the Halocaust. This is someone using real life experience to say, 'woah this thing in Harry Potter is hosed up' which is like the absolute blandest and most normal thing to do with media that's doing any sort of allegory. If instead the conversation had gone; "Guys, I just figured it out. Being called the n-word is like being called a Mudblood, holy poo poo!!! Now I actually understand why people get so worked up about it." then it would be uh some real HP brainworms (and I have 0 doubt someone has said or written that exact sentence) Zore fucked around with this message at 05:57 on May 10, 2021 |
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May 10, 2021 05:55
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josh04 posted:Have we considered the possibility that Voldemort came back wrong? That the tactical, manipulative genius who wreaked havoc on the wizard world fifteen years earlier actually lost a whole lot of lateral thinking power when he got turned into a shrimp man, and the idiot king who can't murder a child, of books five, six and seven, is coasting entirely on rep? Voldemort seemed perfectly fine with conquering Wizarding Britain that I like to imagine him accidentally putting a shard of his soul into Harry is what caused the deterioration. Like Harry is such an idiot that it dragged Voldemort down to his level.
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May 10, 2021 06:01
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Voldemort is definitely a lot crazier than the Death Eaters expect in later books, but hard to tell how much of that is typical fascist going mad with power. Then again, it's also literally just Britain where having total blithering idiots be in charge of everything is completely normal.
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May 10, 2021 06:46
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It's never really talked much about but I imagine the agony of having your soul ripped from your body and then living that warped "not really alive or dead" existence for over a decade does a number on a person's mind. Also the unicorn blood is supposed to "curse" you, forcing you to live a "part life, a cursed life." Maybe that did something to his mind, too.
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May 10, 2021 07:03
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It is shown that Voldemort almost literally has one foot in the grave by the last book because he's used pretty much every immoral, illegal and unholy method of immortality he could manage. And suddenly remembered the first book's whole thing is he's trying to get his hands on the only known reliable, no-downsides method of immortality.
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May 10, 2021 08:16
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the unicorn curse affects his host, it's never said if it affects Voldemort. If it does, he is likely to not notice it due to how much evil he has already done. He wants the philosopher's stone because he is desperate, not because he wants to depend on it permanently. He thinks he could use it to build a new body and stay alive temporarily (plus sidle his way into Gringotts with all the monies because apparently goblins won't understand uncontrolled inflation out of nowhere). Its also never stated if a Horcrux provides immortality. Maybe your body dies but your soul remains, forcing you to make a new one each time, maybe eventually the personality part of the soul evaporates and the Horcruxs are left trying to possess someone. Also he does other things that are not mentioned to make himself more long-lived and potentially immortal.
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May 10, 2021 08:28
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Even the Stone had the one big drawback of needing to always be available to him on-demand (if not always on his person), though. I forget, was it mentioned that Flamel was literally the only person who knew how to make it? Because otherwise, it is kind of weird that Voldemort apparently just completely gave up on the venture after the first try and never bothered again, considering how obsessed with immortality he was.
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May 10, 2021 08:31
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I wish there was more about alchemy. That's a fun kind of magic. e: HP but it's also FMA and Ron is stuck in a robot body
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May 10, 2021 12:11
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Ror posted:
Chamber of Secrets also had Malfoy just straight up saying he wished whoever was turning purple into stone had just killed Hermione instead so he was definitely a hosed up kid.
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May 10, 2021 14:44
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Cross-posting from the cined superhero threadjosh04 posted:
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May 10, 2021 15:49
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Just realized this thread turned 1 year old last month. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xy-4ykwGFDk Cranappleberry posted:the unicorn curse affects his host, it's never said if it affects Voldemort. If it does, he is likely to not notice it due to how much evil he has already done. The whole point of slurpin' that blood was so that it would help Voldemort, so I don't see why the curse wouldn't affect Voldemort just like the magic nutrients.
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May 10, 2021 16:31
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