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Dobby is just c3-p0 with extra steps
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Apr 7, 2020 06:27
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weren't the werewolf cubs just one of the many stupid rumours used to justify expelling hagrid?
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Apr 15, 2020 11:48
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FunkyAl posted:I love this, they're all so functional methods of rationality is extremely cool and funny until you realise that harry isn't actually a child who thinks he's way smarter than anyone else, but rather meant to actually be way smarter than anyone else and also a very obvious vessel for the author's opinions on everything also the racism
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Apr 15, 2020 22:58
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prisoner of azkaban is directed so much better than the other films that it doesn't even feel like it's part of the series
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Apr 22, 2020 06:03
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Also regular invisibility cloaks wear out after a while because they're made of hair from an invisible animal instead of Death Gift Energy
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Apr 23, 2020 01:10
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i don't remember if this is text, subtext, or just part of the endless fan canon, but i always thought it was pretty obvious that slytherin was in a vicious cycle because perfectly good candidates for their positive aspects weren't enormous racists and therefore asked to go literally anywhere else. if you tilt your head and squint 'ambition' and 'bravery' are basically the same thing this provides a nice watsonian reason for the hat to try and put harry in slytherin, to try and salvage its reputation by having him be a hero, along with the doylian 'it creates tension and drama for the protagonist'. also the bad guy's most loyal servant is a gryffindor despite being the least courageous character in the entire series, so it's all sort of arbitrary anyway. maybe school houses shouldn't actually be defining character traits
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Apr 24, 2020 05:37
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basically all the attempts to make Slytherins not evil remind me of mark rosewater saying 'black isn't the color of evil in magic the gathering; capitalism is a black ideology!' 
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Apr 25, 2020 09:11
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it's insane because there's this huge, detailed paragraph in the order of the pheonix where the ministry of magic has this big dumb statue in the middle of their foyer depicting how wizards think of their relationship with other magical creatures and harry outright thinks 'that's bullshit' and then the rest of the books just completely drops this pretty important idea and it's never addressed again. it might be the third-most written about thing in fanfiction, after harry having gay sex and being a member of the nobility
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May 14, 2020 00:16
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as extremely not funny as 'harry potter, cop who kills minorities' is, it also doesn't make sense, because the setting has multiple infallible lie detectors and the burden of proof is on the accused party to drink the truth potion and say they didn't do it rather than on the accuser to provide evidence
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May 17, 2020 05:17
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the wizards could definitely win, and possibly without a shot being fired, but the risk of a whole bunch of people dying even to non-nuclear firepower is pretty unpalatable when there are approx. ten thousand wizards in the entire UK (or some similarly comically low number)
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May 22, 2020 01:17
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Feldegast42 posted:Did anyone ever read that fanfic that imagined Harry as a radical athiest incel that reddit loved boy did i i think my favourite part in hindsight is the last five or so chapters desperately scrambling to point out what an idiot and terrible person the story's version of harry is, culminating in their version of voldemort going to great lengths to prevent him from destroying the entire world, and then harry just pulls increasingly stupid tricks out of his rear end to kill all the death eaters and keep voldemort's barely-alive body in his backpack (because one of his horcruxes is the Voyager plate) there's a few really good ideas mixed in with a lot of absolute garbage, probably the worst of which is the extremely tiresome and overdrawn ender's game sequences that just kept going. and going. and going.
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May 23, 2020 05:38
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Zore posted:Yeah, that was five. eh, this feels uncharitable. he was also an emotional wreck after, you know, having the person in question die in front of him, because of his own stupid sense of 'fair play', so he probably didn't want to date someone who was going to spend a lot of time reopening both of their emotional wounds over it. it's one of the better cases of stupid teenagers not knowing what the hell they're doing in the series. it's nobody's fault.
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Jun 4, 2020 03:36
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well, everyone is angry and petty. you can definitely tell it's written by a middle aged woman from how unhorny it is
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Jun 4, 2020 06:10
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I mean, that's every scene where Snape is 'teaching'
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Jun 5, 2020 09:51
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[shrieking shack voice] please read another book
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Jun 28, 2020 05:11
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harry potter: did writing the books all the time also make Rowling DUMB AS poo poo
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Aug 27, 2020 03:04
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on the other hand, book 3 is the only actual good literature in the entire series. and in an odd coincidence, the only movie directed by an actual human person instead of some congealed glob of british upper classness
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Aug 28, 2020 03:42
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my sister opened a writer's festival last year and one of the 'acts' was a woman with an unfortunate stutter reading her fanfics from when she was a teenager. most of it was 'wow teenage me was weirdly into sexy gay men haha' but the last one was this weirdly poignant story about dudley and his fiancee discovering their child is magic and it was a very heavy-handed lgbt metaphor that kinda totally ruined the 'teenage me was stupid' mood
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Sep 7, 2020 08:11
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"dudley fatted obesily down the stairs"
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Sep 10, 2020 10:40
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DECEPTION (deception) DISGRACE (for shame)
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Sep 12, 2020 05:17
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RWBY did not pull that off well Because it is bad
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Oct 19, 2020 22:13
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also rita skeeter in book 4 specifically is an incredibly uncomfortable transphobic stereotype which gets completely dropped in the movie and the rest of the books never mention it again so???
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Nov 12, 2020 01:15
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Sydin posted:Harry is that kid you knew in HS that never studied, kept forgetting there was homework due, and drew doodles instead of taking notes but still somehow got solid B's because they had just enough natural intelligence to skate by as long as the subject matter was low level. The kind of person who - if they go on to university - either washes out or recognizes that once you get beyond basic 101 poo poo that's not enough unless you're a mega genius and actual effort needs to be put in. i'm in this post and i don't like it 
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Nov 21, 2020 01:23
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hermione is also a good character in the two books in the series which have any remotely good character writing (1 and 3)
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Nov 30, 2020 00:02
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the problem is that ron becomes a teenager after being a Dahl-esque sociopath in the first half and a Small Noble Adult Man in the second half of book 1 and most of 2 speaking from experience, nice and pleasant pre-teens can and will turn into loving moronic jerks during puberty, but the pleasantness of those pre-teens is not anything like how the characters act in the early books either
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Nov 30, 2020 21:56
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in the age of the internet, the times and the products thereof are constantly shifting jenny nicholson, a very funny youtuber, was a brony who straight up wrote a song which used the common slur for the Romani in its title and chorus, and the discourse is continuing on tiktok to this day
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Dec 4, 2020 03:55
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Sydin posted:IIRC there are some throwaway lines in the first book after Harry gets locked in the cupboard that he's annoyed because normally when the Dursley's go out he gets some brief respite and can watch TV/play video games in Dudley's room until they get back. the really funny part is that it's trying to be contemporary but fucks the timeline up and so dudley has a playstation in 1991
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Dec 9, 2020 22:59
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apparently you need to get married first because seamus (or another similar minor character) has a semi-joke where he talks about what a shock finding out his mom was a wizard for his dad on their wedding night. it's very weird, especially coming from an author who has spent most of her life in de facto relationships to the best of my knowledge
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Jan 17, 2021 04:16
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the part where wizards...sometimes are beholden to muggle laws and expectations is by far the most confusing bullshit part of the 'worldbuilding'. like in philosopher's stone it doesn't matter because wizards are still part of normal society, they're just 'others', but as the books advance and it becomes clear that there's a full-on masquerade it breaks down completely
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Jan 21, 2021 22:39
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Voldemort walking into a dozen rakes labelled 'obvious downfalls of villain in a prophecy' and he just keeps going
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Feb 2, 2021 18:53
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please read, another book (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Feb 5, 2021 08:27
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thinking about mcgonagall just BLASTING one of the carrows with the torture spell for no reason
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Feb 10, 2021 00:24
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it's very funny how the first...three, maybe four? books have the killing curse just be this presence where there's a ghastly sound, a huge flash of green light, and somebody is dead. it's exactly the right kind of alien, esoteric, powerful magic that would be forbidden even though you can kill somebody with a million other spells. it's a concept. then in book 5 onwards it's the gun spell
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Feb 10, 2021 02:19
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the idea that dumbledore specifically has mastered magic so well that he can counteract the killing curse is almost interesting, but it's very dumb that the solution is 'just animate a statue to jump in front of you, dipshit' one of the...kind of fanfic-esque? ideas i had which could be an interesting opening scene / flashback would be for voldemort to very slowly walk right up to an auror (maybe james potter) while they frantically cast every single spell they can think of at him, all of them splashing off him like they're nothing, and for him to very casually raise his wand, whisper the killing curse, and the fight is just...over. and then contrast this with every other bad guy in the series fighting 'normally' and nobody using the killing curse because of a combination of a) it's too esoteric/difficult to cast b) they're not powerful enough c) if they try to, it backfires and is just as likely to kill them and/or their allies. i think that would do a good job of establishing how and why voldermort is different and dangerous, rather than him just being a serial killer with a gun who has a bunch of other serial killers with guns under his command
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Feb 10, 2021 04:55
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they replaced the racism statue with a bigger, more racism statue
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Feb 15, 2021 18:57
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rollick posted:I remember being convinced that Hagrid would sacrifice himself to kill Voldemort in the seventh book, for alchemical reasons (Sirius BLACK, ALBUS Dumbledore and RUBEUS Hagrid). you know, this is a better explanation for why hagrid is there when harry dies than anything else i can think of.
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Feb 16, 2021 07:49
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i do like the (cute?) theory that Nitwit, Oddment, Blubber and Tweak are the four house elves in charge of food in the great hall, so dumbledore only looks like a madman to the sort of people who ignore/don't care/don't know about house elves (which is most of the wizarding population)
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Feb 17, 2021 10:05
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 fan fiction recommendationshttps://archiveofourown.org/works/21500365
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Feb 20, 2021 01:39
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listening to the shrieking shack while reading the fanfic(s) that actually address some of the enormous thematic holes in the books is very funny the shrieking shack: how the gently caress does nobody know tom riddle is voldemort??? the work "the prince of slytherin": he put a fidelius charm on his own name
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Mar 5, 2021 00:59
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| # ¿ Apr 24, 2024 16:43 |
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Guy A. Person posted:The 6th movie does recast Lavender as a white girl as soon as she has to make out with one of the leads which is pretty hosed. No telling if Jo had any part of either the original or recasting tho. by all accounts this is just a very big 'oops' where they didn't give a poo poo about the casting of background characters and they didn't get an actual actor until lavender mattered at all to the story.
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Mar 10, 2021 09:15
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