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Its Sunday so it's time for GOON CHURCH! Y'all come on in my goon brothers and sisters Don't forget your commandments as was given to us by our lord and savior Lowtax Thou shall shitpost at least once per day Thou shall take thy communion through a Costco Hot Dog Thou shall share your weed Thou shall NOT grind and snort the host Thou shall not be a dick Thou shall not have any other forums but SA Thou shall NEVER post in DnD, and if thou does, thou is branded a leper and shall stay there Thou shall Live Mas Thou shall have thine fries PILED high Thou shall remember always MODS KNEW Thou shall turn thy monitor on Thou shall say im gay once a day Come on in to the grovertabernacle! Praise Lowtax and pass the communion wine!
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Apr 5, 2020 16:50
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if weed and alcoholism are sacraments, sign me up
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Apr 5, 2020 16:51
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gimme that old time religion (hands u a snake when you walk in the door)
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Apr 5, 2020 16:52
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Praise be unto Costco
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Apr 5, 2020 16:52
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I'm eating any and all asses in the rightmost confession booth for the next hour and a half, no talking or eye contact please
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Apr 5, 2020 16:53
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im gay
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Apr 5, 2020 16:56
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Dixville posted:im gay bless you my son/daughter/identity of your choice
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Apr 5, 2020 16:57
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Does the collection plate take bitcoins?
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Apr 5, 2020 16:58
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And Lo, the blessed son carried the printer on his back while the redditors spit and hissed at him. But he did not give in to their hate.
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Apr 5, 2020 17:00
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If Mod is real let Him strike me down.  (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Apr 5, 2020 17:08
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poopnanners posted:If Mod is real let Him strike me down.
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Apr 5, 2020 17:10
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A tired goon comes in from the cold. Long have they traveled, longer still since they've been to a service or even seen a chapel like this. "How long has it been? Still vBulletin?" A smile passes over fatly chapped lips. "...and they say you can never log in again." A dim glow greets them, familiar. Unforgotten instinct washes through the body. Hand reaches for the bowl. The goon whispers as they annoint themselves on entry "Holy. poo poo. Piiissss" Small voices reach up from the sub-forums, posters unseen. "Hey there Lowtax. Who's on YouTube. LMAO at thy name. Thy post be made in Gibbis As it was in FYAD.." They wander on. Confession must be made. Penance must be paid to change this custom title. They make their way to the small booth and PM the mod. "Bless me mod for I have trolled. It's been 272.38 days since my last post and I claim to be a porpoise." For a while there is no response. The goon presumes that the forums software has eaten the PM. Fuckin Radium. After a moment however, the screen creaks and slowly slides open. Behind the grating there is an unseen figure. It is a man, but his features are vague. The goon leans nearer to make out whatever penance this being can offer. "Hi. I'm Rick. From Nudeweb."
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Apr 5, 2020 17:12
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Thou shall be permabanned from the kingdom if thou doest not learn to 
My Shoes fucked around with this message at 17:17 on Apr 5, 2020 |
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Apr 5, 2020 17:13
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Big Beef City posted:A tired goon comes in from the cold. 
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Apr 5, 2020 17:15
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poopnanners posted:If Mod is real let Him strike me down. 
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Apr 5, 2020 17:27
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poopnanners posted:If Mod is real let Him strike me down. He got smote. My Shoes fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Apr 5, 2020 |
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Apr 5, 2020 17:32
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poopnanners posted:If Mod is real let Him strike me down. But the hand of the MOD was heavy upon them of Ashdod, and he probated them, and smote them with hemorrhoids
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Apr 5, 2020 17:36
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My Shoes posted:Come on in to the grovertabernacle! Praise Lowtax and pass the communion wine!
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Apr 5, 2020 17:42
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For Lowtax so loved the forums that he gave his one and only Spine, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal probation.
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Apr 5, 2020 17:48
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All together now! Blessed be St.Richard, our patron of loving up in new and exciting ways! AAAAHHHHHIIIIIAAAAAMMMGAAAAYYY!
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Apr 5, 2020 17:53
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In the name of the Father, the Daughter, and the Other Daughter
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Apr 5, 2020 17:57
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Who What Now posted:In the name of the Father, the Daughter, and the Other Daughter  I like where this is going.
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Apr 5, 2020 17:58
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choose a thread tag for your threads
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Apr 5, 2020 18:24
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*lets off a dank fart during the sermon*
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Apr 5, 2020 18:25
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*emerges from the confession booth with a brand new thousand yard stare* I...I need to brush my teeth...
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Apr 5, 2020 18:27
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We're all out of communion Doritos. And please don't get cool ranch, I'd prefer a more Xtreme flavor blasted communion this week.
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Apr 5, 2020 18:29
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Cat Army
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:choose a thread tag for your threads That would gently caress w my brand friendo Peace be with you!
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Apr 5, 2020 18:30
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William Henry Hairytaint posted:*emerges from the confession booth with a brand new thousand yard stare* Your breathe smells like rear end 
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Apr 5, 2020 18:38
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well then it's a poo poo brand
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Apr 5, 2020 18:54
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:well then it's a poo poo brand Be careful. I am the demiurge and i can smite you. :P
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Apr 5, 2020 18:55
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demiurge DESTROYED with FACTS and LOGIC
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Apr 5, 2020 18:55
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:demiurge DESTROYED with FACTS and LOGIC That's it. You are now banned from the orgy after wednesday night supper at the goon church. No butt stuff for you.
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Apr 5, 2020 18:57
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I for one am proud to lead the ketchup on hot dog sect of the Costcites.
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Apr 5, 2020 18:59
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I come to every session covered in the blood of the innocents
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Apr 5, 2020 19:01
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My Shoes posted:That's it. You are now banned from the orgy after wednesday night supper at the goon church. 
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Apr 5, 2020 19:14
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Please do not forget our most sacred of numbers.... 69
MakaVillian fucked around with this message at 20:26 on Apr 5, 2020 |
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Apr 5, 2020 19:16
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MakaVillian posted:Please do not forget our most sacred of numbers number.... 4206980085
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Apr 5, 2020 20:07
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thats his actual phone number guys hello this is the internet calling!
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Apr 5, 2020 20:25
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Ive been seriously considering going to a no-poo poo Christian church recently, just for my own psychological health, not because I really expect any kind of tangible benefit. I felt like a hypocrite and and a phony just being there in the parking lot. Don’t really know where this is going, guess its one of those non-stories that just ends.
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Apr 5, 2020 20:26
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Nigmaetcetera posted:Ive been seriously considering going to a no-poo poo Christian church recently, just for my own psychological health, not because I really expect any kind of tangible benefit. I felt like a hypocrite and and a phony just being there in the parking lot. Don’t really know where this is going, guess its one of those non-stories that just ends. Going to anything but goon church is a sure way to get the virus and descend into hell.
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Apr 5, 2020 20:27
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