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Dr Pepper
Feb 4, 2012

Don't like it? well...

OK so you see this one lady in the background with 5 seconds of screen time?

She's going to be the FIRST OPENLY GAY Star Wars character.


Feb 4, 2013

Something looks fishy.

Dr Pepper posted:

OK so you see this one lady in the background with 5 seconds of screen time?

She's going to be the FIRST OPENLY GAY Star Wars character.

Ah, taking a page from the Finding Dory playbook.

Or was that the Beauty and the Beast playbook?


Combat Theory
Jul 16, 2017

Bespin High

All your loved and hated characters in their late puberty played by the cheapest group of actors money can buy.

Feb 13, 2012

Have you heard the good news?

Look deeply into my eyes.


It's time to bring Star Wars: Droids back for new audiences.

I envision it being reborn as a prestige hourly TV drama with a darker athmosphere. There'll be an ensemble cast of new droids (all voiced by popular movie actors). We can figure out the plot later, what's important is that it'll have robots - they're popular right now, have you guys seen that Westworld show? We gotta get on this.

Sep 30, 2002


SlothfulCobra posted:

Could we introduce a "bad" type of rebel to demonstrate what people should definitely not do so we don't get people challenging monopolies or trying to redistribute wealth?
I'm thinking a large-scale challenge to the Rebels by the Third Whills. Get a nice Sand Person to advocate nonviolent resistance, get some fringe worlds to sign up for the idea that imperial blockades are a sign of a healthy space democracy and that you won't worry about getting boarded if you don't have anything to hide. Cap it off with Vote Naboo No Matter Who and we've got a start!!

Nov 22, 2010


Grimey Drawer

God spoke to me last night. We need to make a Star Wars about abstaining from sex before marriage and life starting at conception.

Filthy Hans
Jun 27, 2008

Alright, I'm thinking pre-prequel

we're going to go right to the start - when the Midichlorians show up

it'll be like that 28 Days Later movie, y'know, ripped from the headlines pandemic poo poo that should really resonate with those self-quarantining losers

here's the deal: people are going about their dreary, pointless lives and then suddenly Sith show up, shooting lightning and light sabering and getting weird facial tattoos and stuff

and the people who get lightninged or sabered, some of them become Sith too

so they bring in some Fauchi nerd, maybe we can get Brad Pitt? Whatever... this nerd figures out its midichlorians that are causing the ruckus

maybe he invents a serum or something that creates Jedi, I haven't thought about it that far ahead

now I've done a ton of research on zombie poo poo, and the trick of this - the crucible of zombie success - is that your heroes are morons who never get anything done

all you gotta do is have some gore and some maudlin whining every episode, and kick the can down the road to the season finale - no need for writers, so we save on the front end

now, you're asking about monetizing this crap, so here it is - we make those big bobblehead dolls the losers snap up by the dozen

"but everyone else already does that?" gently caress YOU Ernie, you're fired

the genius of it is, we get them to buy those stupid loving bighead dolls and then we kill the characters off, and introduce new ones halfway through the season

we just churn that poo poo for 10 seasons or so, and then we have a second TV show after called Talking Midichlorians which is basically just 30 minutes shilling the new dolls

ring a ding ding, baby!

Filthy Hans fucked around with this message at 21:51 on May 26, 2020


Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

"When I started here all there was was lampshade warehouses and leather bars, the serious leather bars where you wouldn't get in unless you had a rubber ball stuffed in your mouth, the wine list was tattooed on the bartender's face. That kind of place."

-Bogus Adventure

The Real Housewives of Coruscant---Now hear me out!

We tell the stories of a bunch of women married to the movers and shakers in the center of the Galaxy! Think of it! Four powerful women, four big personalities, four side stories each week! A beautiful, vapid Twi'lek who has botox'd the crap out of her face. A big, fat, sassy Gungan who takes no poo poo! A mischievous Rodian who is having affair after affair behind her Senator husband's back, and always has a different wig! A Human who married a Trade Federation big wig solely for the credits! We hint that the Neimoidian is gay, but never confirm it so that we don't lose the morality police money! The Gungan and the Rodian are always feuding. The Twi'lek is working on her techno jizz wailing career! The Human is always starting new business ventures and pimping them out to her social media stans on Holo-Net Twitter, we'll call it Star Wars Holo-Net Twitter---Swhitter for short because there's NO WAY anyone could make fun of it!

*does another huge line of coke*

Hell, even if the show fails, we start up Swhitter and charge these loving chuckleheads to join and post under their Star Wars persona---a Swersona!

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