- ulvir
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The Matrix world set in pre-industrial times.
“where we’re going you don’t need ploughs”
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May 27, 2020 20:44
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- Adbot
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Apr 19, 2024 01:59
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- google THIS
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The Architect's office has floor to ceiling puppet theaters on every wall. Hundreds of creepy Neo puppets yelling "Bullshit!" in comical squeaky voices.
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May 27, 2020 20:45
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- ulvir
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Tell me, Mr. Anderson, what good is a loom if you are unable to weave?
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May 27, 2020 20:49
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- nut
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the oracle: in the distant future there will a hedgehog, he will roll around.... at the speed of sound
neo: b-but why
the oracle: he's... he's got places to go. He has to follow his rainbow.
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May 27, 2020 21:23
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Neo falls afoul of an Irishman.
e: we need Guiness. Lots of Guiness.
Prurient Squid fucked around with this message at 22:03 on May 27, 2020
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May 27, 2020 21:58
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- ulvir
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instead of the 90s goth hacker music aesthetic like nine inch nails and the like, the soundtrack is all tinny piano silent film type music, but otherwise the movie is the same
i extremely want a matrix movie where neo is played by Chaplin or Buster Keaton now
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May 27, 2020 22:41
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- Christoph
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Genius!
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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May 27, 2020 23:44
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- google THIS
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Instead of having cool sounding allegorical names they all have actual hacker names. xXBigBonerBob69Xx presents the two pills to the One, the prophecy, the only hope for humanity, ButtTheShitmanFart.
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May 28, 2020 03:14
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- magic cactus
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We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.
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neo speedrunning the matrix by jumping rapidly into the corner
speedrun goes great until neo hits the softlock in the architect's conversation cutscene.
Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!
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May 28, 2020 03:15
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- idiotsavant
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neo speedrunning the matrix by jumping rapidly into the corner
lol
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May 28, 2020 08:28
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- idiotsavant
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neo: we need savescummers... lots of savescummers
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May 28, 2020 08:34
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- Escape From Noise
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Morpheus is freeing people and turning them into Bitcoin mining rigs so he can spread the truth about crypto currencies that they don't want you to know about!
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May 28, 2020 08:46
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- google THIS
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Neo is now played by Adam Sandler. Agent Smith is also Adam Sandler. Morpheus is Kevin James. Trinity, obviously Adam Sandler again.
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May 28, 2020 13:10
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- alnilam
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Neo is now played by Adam Sandler. Agent Smith is also Adam Sandler. Morpheus is Kevin James. Trinity, obviously Adam Sandler again.
The Matrix as one of those movies where Eddie Murphy plays everyone
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May 28, 2020 13:35
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- alnilam
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When they jump across buildings and poo poo there is flubber involved
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May 28, 2020 13:36
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- magic cactus
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We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.
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Morpheus: The Matrix is a computer-generated dream world built to keep us under control in order to change a human being into THIS **holds up a Flesh light**
Neo: ...
Morpheus: poo poo.
Neo: Jesus Christ, man...
Morpheus: I... I don't even know how that got there, honestly
Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!
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May 29, 2020 01:04
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- The_Rob
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Blah blah blah blah!!
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I’m the matrix but part of being neo is that your donger is bigger than everyone and you’re cool and everyone wants to be my friend. also nothing bad happens and it’s only good. that’s the matrix
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May 29, 2020 01:14
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- kuskus
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Neo sits in a chair next to a cracked mirror. The cracked mirror seals together and reflection of Neo augmented with a HUD element pinned to his forehead that reads, "what's your ancestry?  " The card flashes options 10 times a second: African, Egyptian, Nordic... It lands on "Snickers". Neo's body turns into a liquid metal turd-like bar as he screams in modem sounds. Once it solidifies into chocolate and nougat, Cypher takes a bite– it really satisfies– he says, "Ignorance is bliss. That's brisk, baby!!!"
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May 29, 2020 03:55
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- Escape From Noise
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Matrix follows the Apritrix, and will by the Juntrix
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May 29, 2020 05:09
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- ulvir
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Neo, but played by the Home Improvement guy, doing the wuuugghh-thing instead of saying “whoa”
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May 30, 2020 14:31
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- Escape From Noise
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Neo, but played by the Home Improvement guy, doing the wuuugghh-thing instead of saying “whoa”
Morpheus as Wilson
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May 30, 2020 14:34
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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What if the "die in the Matrix = die in reality" rule was rescinded so that you could have people in the Matrix whose bodies are dead who can't leave and people who are dead in the Matrix but are alive in the real world. That would make for a new twist on the old theme.
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May 30, 2020 16:29
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- alnilam
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What if the "die in the Matrix = die in reality" rule was rescinded so that you could have people in the Matrix whose bodies are dead who can't leave and people who are dead in the Matrix but are alive in the real world. That would make for a new twist on the old theme.
Waiting to respawn
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May 30, 2020 16:38
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- Khanstant
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imo Matrix should've been set in the same timeframe as Little House on the Prairie. Laura Ingalls is way more precious protagonist than Thomas A Anderson. She also has the heart of a true hero and martyr. One time her baby brother died and the night before she refused to pray for him in her nightly prayer, because she was anxious about this new baby replacing her in her father's eyes. She feels so bad she goes to the preacher and asks what to do and how to make god listen to her now that she's praying for forgiveness and to bring the baby back to life. The preacher tells her that god cant hear sometimes so she needs to get closer to God. She takes it literally and runs away from home, leaving a note, to go up the mountains. She gets to a peak to pray to god and tries to bargain with God to take her as his new daughter, since God already had a son and might want a daughter, and give her baby brother back to Ma an Pa. God, of course, didn't listen, but it really shows she is willing to make the sacrifices not everyone would be willing to make.
Neo only barely broke the Matrix cycle because of his lust for Trinity, which means we would all be better off if Laura Ingalls was Neo instead. She would've broke the cycle the first time around!!
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May 30, 2020 18:32
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- Khanstant
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obviously all the prairie dresses and bonnets should be remade with black leather and stuff too
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May 30, 2020 18:33
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Instead of 1990s hacker aesthetic it's 2010s mumbelcore aesthetic and the rave is now a folk-jazz jam session. The Agent Smith fights are all now Greta Gerwig spilling wine and laying woke bombs on the misguided frat boy protagonist.
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May 30, 2020 23:07
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- Adbot
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Apr 19, 2024 01:59
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May 27, 2020 20:44
