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Starks
Sep 24, 2006

Willfrey posted:

All of my problems are usually not my fault

same lol

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Firstborn
Oct 14, 2012

i'm the heckin best
yeah
yeah
yeah
frig all the rest

gimme the GOD drat candy posted:

i joined the military

Flutieflakes017
Feb 16, 2012

only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain

Willfrey posted:

Hmmm...

In ascending order

Street raced a volvo S80 wagon (fast car that looks like grocery getter) in my clapped out 67' mercury cougar. Cop was 2 cars back, pulls me over right in front of the Boise courthouse and I get a wreckless driving

Worked at a jiffy lube. My manager was in front of a car, I quickly hop in to fire it up and get oil pressure, with both my feet hanging out the door. Car is a manual, in gear with no neutral start switch. Car lurches forward, hits boss, hits garage door busting out all the windows. Amazingly I was not fired

Sold my perfectly working pickup to get an 83' toyota landcruiser just as they were appreciating in value. Own it for 2 whole days before leaving it out of gear in front of my house. I walk out my front door to see it rolling away from me. Rolls across the street and hits a tree in the front yard of a house kitty-cornee to me, loving up the whole rear end a caving in the roof. Actually super thankful for the tree otherwise it would have hit their house.

Last one, getting a great career job, climb the ranks earn great money. Eat a bad meal, get real sick Friday and I call in. Smoke some weed for the nausea. Drug test monday! Fml got fired.


Pretty bad luck with vehicles really

These are amazing. Vehicles are not your friend.

It's not the worst decision I've ever made (that would be law school and not dropping out of law school) but your Boise story reminded me of a pretty hilarious ski accident I had at Bogus Basin. Basically, I got about 2/3 of the way down "Wildcat" decided to just bail and straight-line down . I ended up catching alot of air coming off 2-3 bumps I hadn't been able to see before I ended up on my back and slid off the side into a ravine. I remember sliding toward the edge and thinking "this is it.. this is how you get really injured skiing.. good job Flutie" closing my eyes and going through a net, a 'slow down' sign, over the side and into a bunch of tree limbs. I was about 10' below the trail tangled in a tree and missing a ski but aside from some tender ribs pretty much unharmed.

Never bail out on a black diamond when you don't know conditions below.

SneezeOfTheDecade
Feb 6, 2011

gettin' covid all
over your posts
It's pretty pedestrian in comparison, but I decided to get into a relationship with someone who systematically stripped me of almost all of my friends and turned out to be a serial cheater (and if I'd listened to my friends I'd have known that :doh:), got married to her, and spent three years in wedded poverty because she'd grown up with wealth and would just spend all our money as soon as it came in, and I was too spineless to do anything about it. When she didn't come back from one of her "friendly visits" to her male friends, I wasn't exactly heartbroken. (I found out later that apparently she didn't bother to wait until we were divorced in order to get married again, and that's why one day she was suddenly a lot more interested in the process getting done right now.) It's only after a couple years of therapy that I'm getting to the point that I don't have anxiety when I spend money (because she'd get upset if I spent "non-essential" money on something that wasn't for her) or look for work (we worked in the same field, and she hated it when I got work and she didn't). It's a cliche, but I'm pretty sure the last 14 years of my life would have been measurably better if I hadn't gotten involved with her.

Worf
Sep 12, 2017

If only Seth would love me like I love him!

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

It's pretty pedestrian in comparison, but I decided to get into a relationship with someone who systematically stripped me of almost all of my friends and turned out to be a serial cheater (and if I'd listened to my friends I'd have known that :doh:), got married to her, and spent three years in wedded poverty because she'd grown up with wealth and would just spend all our money as soon as it came in, and I was too spineless to do anything about it. When she didn't come back from one of her "friendly visits" to her male friends, I wasn't exactly heartbroken. (I found out later that apparently she didn't bother to wait until we were divorced in order to get married again, and that's why one day she was suddenly a lot more interested in the process getting done right now.) It's only after a couple years of therapy that I'm getting to the point that I don't have anxiety when I spend money (because she'd get upset if I spent "non-essential" money on something that wasn't for her) or look for work (we worked in the same field, and she hated it when I got work and she didn't). It's a cliche, but I'm pretty sure the last 14 years of my life would have been measurably better if I hadn't gotten involved with her.

im glad u got rid of her i like you

1st_Panzer_Div.
May 11, 2005
Grimey Drawer
In early college before I was info hiking and stuff, was hiking at Mt. Rainer with my family, brother and I go on our own. Come up to a sweet valley at the bottom of a cliff. We test the cliff by rolling a rock down. Rock shatters, I say hey were more agile than a rock and down we go.

Not satisfied, we wander the valley, no map, no supplies, and a white out warning on the day. See a bear at a river, and white out starts. Can't see anything, follow the river back to a trail, decide a direction and by some miracle make it back to the parking lot guessing every trail fork correctly.

Rangers had been alerted and had already started some search parties and were absolutely shocked when we walked into the parking lot.

It took a long time and a number of hikes before I realized just how stupid we had been.

Willfrey
Jul 20, 2007

Why don't the poors simply buy more money?
Fun Shoe

Flutieflakes017 posted:

These are amazing. Vehicles are not your friend.

It's not the worst decision I've ever made (that would be law school and not dropping out of law school) but your Boise story reminded me of a pretty hilarious ski accident I had at Bogus Basin. Basically, I got about 2/3 of the way down "Wildcat" decided to just bail and straight-line down . I ended up catching alot of air coming off 2-3 bumps I hadn't been able to see before I ended up on my back and slid off the side into a ravine. I remember sliding toward the edge and thinking "this is it.. this is how you get really injured skiing.. good job Flutie" closing my eyes and going through a net, a 'slow down' sign, over the side and into a bunch of tree limbs. I was about 10' below the trail tangled in a tree and missing a ski but aside from some tender ribs pretty much unharmed.

Never bail out on a black diamond when you don't know conditions below.

OMG lol, bogus basin black diamonds are sun baked bobsled runs I can only imagine how fast you were going

I first learned to snowboard there and being a clueless former hick I wore blue jeans and cotton long underwear that were soaked after 2 runs of nothing but falling on my rear end. I was on a tiny snowboard I found in a dumpster and decided boarding was my new hobby. I had no knowledge or at the least did not pay attention to ski run difficulty so I think I started on a black diamond and moved to blue? I was a hazard to myself and everyone around me.

I remember young kids going up a ski lift laughing and making fun of me as I lay cold, exhausted, defeated. LOL lookin back

Smiling Mandrill
Jan 19, 2015

1st_Panzer_Div. posted:

In early college before I was info hiking and stuff, was hiking at Mt. Rainer with my family, brother and I go on our own. Come up to a sweet valley at the bottom of a cliff. We test the cliff by rolling a rock down. Rock shatters, I say hey were more agile than a rock and down we go.

Not satisfied, we wander the valley, no map, no supplies, and a white out warning on the day. See a bear at a river, and white out starts. Can't see anything, follow the river back to a trail, decide a direction and by some miracle make it back to the parking lot guessing every trail fork correctly.

Rangers had been alerted and had already started some search parties and were absolutely shocked when we walked into the parking lot.

It took a long time and a number of hikes before I realized just how stupid we had been.

This is my life hiking minus the white out. One time me and a buddy were hiking in Oregon on an old logging road and a ranger pulled up and asked if we knew where we were. We told him no, and he said I have no idea where the gently caress we are either. So turn around, and go back the way you came otherwise you will get in too deep and nobody will ever find you. We laughed being experienced outdoors men. However after checking a map it was obvious that we had no appreciation for how expansive the Oregon wilderness is. You can go for hundreds of miles in any direction without ever seeing civilization and that is bad rear end as well as terrifying.

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

Smiling Mandrill posted:

However after checking a map it was obvious that we had no appreciation for how expansive the Oregon wilderness is. You can go for hundreds of miles in any direction without ever seeing civilization and that is bad rear end as well as terrifying.

And you just explained why it's fun to live here. The city people just don't understand what they're missing.

:clint:

Willfrey
Jul 20, 2007

Why don't the poors simply buy more money?
Fun Shoe

Literally A Person posted:

And you just explained why it's fun to live here. The city people just don't understand what they're missing.

:clint:

QFT

Buy a walking GPS, google map your parking lot and ultimate destination and program in those coordinates, that's my MO if I am hiking unfamiliar territory

Tetramin
Apr 1, 2006

I'ma buck you up.

Theophany posted:

I mean, I'm not proud of it. It's like the most tragic wannabe Wolf of Wall Street poo poo that every movie producer would turn down for being too middle class, I guess.


He ended up a year or so later getting stung for loving his girlfriend, who happened to be a receptionist for the company, in the kitchen where they were serving up food for clients. There was also another guy who managed to rack up something like $200k in a year because he kept claiming for the same $600 first class train ticket over and over to cover for the insane cash withdrawals he was making at ATMs because hookers don't take cards and don't give tax invoices. His wife would've otherwise questioned these ATM withdrawals at like 2am. In fact it was him getting investigated and summarily fired that put our entire team's spending habits under the microscope lol.

e: I swear I could write an entire thread of what a loving moron I was at that company whilst simulatenously thinking I was all of Ocean's 11 wrapped up in a single brain.

You greedy pigs probably got a bunch of people innocently skimming small amounts of money at a time busted

Theophany
Jul 22, 2014

SUCCHIAMI IL MIO CAZZO DA DIETRO, RANA RAGAZZO



2022 FIA Formula 1 WDC

Tetramin posted:

You greedy pigs probably got a bunch of people innocently skimming small amounts of money at a time busted

A friend from a different department told me that after the shitstorm had subsided, it all got brushed under the rug pretty quickly. The company was very publicly up for sale for a second time in quick succession and the total lack of managerial oversight was endemic. Not only that, but the guy that headed up the finance and audit departments was a board member and very good buddies with the CEO, so it looked really bad that his team had not been auditing expense claims at all.

Torquemada
Oct 21, 2010

Drei Gläser
Probably a toss up between huffing aerosol until I passed out or tipping the cab of a truck forward while I was in it. Honourable mention to jumping into the Gulf of Cagliari on my honeymoon when I have a mortal fear of open water.

Aginor
Aug 1, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
Think the question should be when have I not done something stupid.

Jeza
Feb 13, 2011

The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.
Did a few dumb things as a kid, but I think you get more of a pass. The dumbest thing I did with a fully developed (??) brain was when I was renting a cottage with some friends in the Lake District in the UK. I was on a walk with one friend, basically showing the some of the cool things in the vicinity. A couple of miles away there's an abandoned mine, and there is a cool bridge made of a single massive rock across a fairly deep ravine. I wanted to show him, but I could only remember half the way there, and I got to a point way below it but couldn't find the way up.

I knew it was straight ahead, but couldn't figure out the way around, so I figured we'd just scramble up directly. The hillside was covered in ferns, so you couldn't really see the surface too well. And everything was loving sopping wet, because this is the UK. So we got about halfway up and it was getting steeper and steeper, and in fact it is now almost a vertical climb. Getting soaked through, not wearing anything appropriate save walking boots, only holding onto wet mossy rocks. I looked down at my out of shape friend below me, who is believing I'm knowing what I'm doing, and I realise that if one of us slips and falls, probably dead for sure. And no phone signal or people for a long way in any direction. And there's no way we can maneuver back down. So I make out like everything is totally fine and just press on.

Story ends in total anti-climax, make it to the top alive and get where we're going - including finding the gentle winding path that is the actual way up, hiding just out of sight. I guess the moral of the story is don't just arbitrarily decide to climb a rain slick cliff face.

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Worf
Sep 12, 2017

If only Seth would love me like I love him!

Loyal friend

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