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TheGreatEvilKing
Mar 28, 2016





What the hell is this?

Stygian, Reign of the Old Ones is a computer RPG set in the works of HP Lovecraft. You play as a survivor of Arkham Massachusetts, where, after an event called the Black Day where Arkham got sucked into some kind of messed up dimensional rift ruled by the Old Ones, you are trying to find a way to escape and get back to Earth. You must contend with the deadly 1920s Chicago Mafia, horrible flesh-eating ghouls, dark sorcery, the cult of Cthulhu, and more! See the video trailer below! Can you survive the physical and mental terrors of Arkham?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SgAEAbBpbVM

That looks cool! How does it play?

This is your standard vaguely infinity engine isometric RPG. You get a party of Lovecraft characters/Lovecraft's real-life wife, you roam around doing quests and whatnot, and because this is Lovecraft you have a sanity bar that doubles as your MP. Combat is turn-based on a hex map rather than real-time with pause. Where this game differs from most of the rest is in its sanity mechanics. As you go more and more insane from looking at Cthulhu and witnessing various horrors, you pick up terrible mental afflictions that overwrite your standard dialog tree with "The Voice of Madness". I will be showing this - as well as the other unique sanity mechanics - off in this LP!

Are you going to include more pretentious literary bullshit? No one liked that!

Shut up. Yes, I am - I've read most of Lovecraft's works, and a few of his inspirations such as Edgar Allen Poe and Robert Chambers. We're going to be taking what Lovecraft actually wrote and comparing it to what the developers are giving us here. Don't look at me like that! It's relevant for once!

Hey Lovecraft was a big racist, he named his ca-
The game is going to address this. Hold off on that right now. We will get to it.

Oh man, Great Evil King, are you going to be playing an actually good game for once?

No. Did you watch the trailer and think "this looks like a cool game with great atmosphere?" The game is Lovecraft as filtered through two fifteen-year-old kids trying to tackle adult themes. One of the character classes is "sex wizard", and they recover sanity by reading porn magazines while resting. Really. The sexless town of Arkham is full of prostitutes and other weirdos, and the sanity mechanics include an "angst meter" that, as you get into fights, forces you to select mental illnesses to screw over your character. That "voice of madness" mechanic I referenced earlier?



Yea. The gameplay is a miserable mess of survival horror and losing control of your character because a trained soldier who fought in World War I saw a dude get killed by ghouls. Combat is slow, tedious, and RNG prone, and the developers sudden whiplash between horror and juvenile comedy makes it impossible for the game to maintain a consistent tone. I am playing this so you don't have to!

Audience participation? Audience participation? Au-

Yes! You, heroic goons of Something Awful, get to inflict whatever character you want on me, and I will be stuck with him or her. I'll be going through the character creation process below, and I need you all to vote on which unfortunate person is going to wander the land of Cthulhu and prostitutes.



We can be male or female.



We need to choose an age. Young characters get an attribute boost but lower skill points, Middle Aged characters are the balanced option, and Old characters eat a stat penalty but have higher skill points. You get more skill points as you level up, but not attributes.

We need to choose an archetype.



Each of the archetypes has 4 sub-archetypes - one that has no boosts nor penalties, and three that have a tradeoff.

Scientist: Generic Academic, no penalties.
Researcher: Faster Scientific and Medical Research, -1 Physical Defense
Psychiatrist: +1 Psychology (used to determine motives), -1 Supernatural Defense
Physician: +1 Medicine, -1 Melee Attack, -1 Ranged Attack


Patrician: Generic Aristocrat.
Prodigal: Start the game with more money, but lower sex appeal.
Cursed Bloodline: +1 Occult (magic), +5% critical failure chance (misfiring guns to hit our allies, etc)
Bankrupt Royalty: +1 Survival, less money.

Note that Aristocrats come with a butler companion who is pretty handy in combat.


Gangster: Generic criminal.
Thief: +1 Stealth, -1 Melee Attack. Note that ammo is fairly scarce in this game.
Hitman: +1 Firearms, +50 ANGST (the not XP for mental illness not-levels)
Con Artist: +1 Speechcraft, -1 Physical Defense


Adventurer: Generic Explorer
Pathfinder: Lower chance of random encounters, but smaller inventory size. I've never had inventory be an issue in this game.
Mountaineer: +1 Athletics, -2% Critical Success Chance
Big Game Hunter: "Higher damage to beastly enemies", -1 melee attack.

Note that explorers come with a friendly dog companion!


Detective: Generic investigator
Occult Detective: +1 Occult, +50 Angst.
Ex-cop: +1 Firearms, -5 total Sanity
Bounty Hunter: +1 Stealth, but you have to be Materialist philosophy.


Secret Society: Generic occultist.
Mesmerist: +1 Psychology, -5 total Sanity.
Alchemist: Considerably higher Medical Research rating, Lower Trading Value
Depraved Occultist: This one deserves its own screenshot.



Actor: Generic Performer
Movie Actor: Higher Sex Appeal, more likely to get addicted to drugs
Juggler: +2 Throwing, +5% Critical Failure Chance
Busker: +1 Subterfuge, less starting money.


Captain: Generic soldier
Military Intelligence: +1 Subterfuge, -1 Physical Defense
Marine: Starts the game with "Aimed Shot" ability, -5 max Sanity.
Bouncer: +1 Melee, -1 Reaction (Initiative, basically. Who goes first).

Next, we need a belief system for our character.



Our options are:
Humanistic: Regain sanity by performing altruistic actions.
Materialistic: Hedonism. Get high, get laid, whatever.
Nihilistic: Cannot regain sanity through actions, but has a higher mental resistance. You still get sanity through rest and whatnot, you just don't get any dialog options letting you ramble about Jesus or porn or whatever to get sanity back.
Divine: Gets sanity by praying and whatnot.
Rational: Get back sanity by doing science or medicine stuff. The game recommends we take the science or medicine skills.
Esoteric: Get back sanity by ranting about magic and reading Aleister Crowley books (really).

Lastly, we need a portrait and a name for this wonderful individual.

Men:



Women:



Alright! Give me a character, and we can get this show on the road.

List of updates
Sex Wizardry: Cuck Rising
Reign of the Bad Coding
Random Men On Street Break Game
Let's Not Talk About Race
Attack of the KKKultists
It's not Unoriginality, it's CANON!
Random Child Abuse
Ambush of Sheer loving Incompetence
PEE-PEE INTO FOO-FOO
Stop! Put those brains down!
Let's Not Talk About Manifest Destiny
It's Not Nativism! We Swear!
The Amount of Sheer loving Incompetence On Display Is Amazing
Clap Your Hands, Seals!
Sweet Jesus Make The Hurting Stop
The Care and Feeding of Dickmutants
Duel of the Cornutos
Absolute Garbage
Postmortem: Dunning-Kruger

TheGreatEvilKing fucked around with this message at 23:57 on Aug 21, 2020

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ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It is time for your viscera to see the light of day!

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

drkeiscool
Aug 1, 2014


Soiled Meat

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

Hahaha hell yes

TheGreatEvilKing
Mar 28, 2016



ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

Unfortunately you have to be either prodigal or a depraved occultist, those are subclasses of aristocrat or occultist respectively.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

We'll make diamonds from their ashes. Take them into battle with us.

Craft a Diamond Dog diamond?
Nah.   Let's do it!




College Slice

Ooh this looks interesting, don't think I've heard of this one.

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

Haha I was trying to come up with some sort of adventurous old man/butler team but I don't think I can top this.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It is time for your viscera to see the light of day!

TheGreatEvilKing posted:

Unfortunately you have to be either prodigal or a depraved occultist, those are subclasses of aristocrat or occultist respectively.

Ah, I misread. It's a pretty clear choice for depraved occultist then.

drkeiscool
Aug 1, 2014


Soiled Meat

https://imgur.com/gallery/0vuXnUO

here's bertha

Mathwyn
Oct 31, 2012

Ante up.




There is a real weird lack of hair colour variety on those portraits, especially the female ones. Not a single lady with blond hair for some reason?

Weird observation aside, this looks super interesting, I'm looking forward to it!

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009

I GAIN POWER FROM EATING PEOPLE, JUST ASSUME I'M ALWAYS VOTING TO EAT PEOPLE



Nap Ghost

Captain Hygiene posted:

Haha I was trying to come up with some sort of adventurous old man/butler team but I don't think I can top this.

Literally batman

Arcanuse
Mar 14, 2019



Remember playing this one a while back. Tried a minimum sanity character to start, ended up switching out for a (relative) beacon of mental fortitude.

So more than a bit curious how the sanity effects work out other than "inconvenient at best".

Which is to say,

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

Best of luck with this one.

Sindai
Jan 24, 2007
i want to achieve immortality through not dying

Nap Ghost

Reading the archetypes I thought pet dog had a fair chance of beating sex wizard, but I should have known better.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

We'll make diamonds from their ashes. Take them into battle with us.

Craft a Diamond Dog diamond?
Nah.   Let's do it!




College Slice

Sindai posted:

Reading the archetypes I thought pet dog had a fair chance of beating sex wizard, but I should have known better.

I thought about voting for one, but decided I could not in good conscience force a doggo to deal with sanity-destroying eldritch abominations. People though? Eh who cares, send em in

BisbyWorl
Jan 12, 2019

GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS



ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

Bogart
Apr 12, 2010

Time to button mash!


loving hate when head go whoop

Black Robe
Sep 12, 2017

Generic Magic User



What the eldritch gently caress is this game

Okay then.

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.



Grimey Drawer

Well, it seems nihilist granny sex wizard has already won. Looking forward to seeing her adventures!

Still, I'll toss out the Materialistic Female Middle-Aged Adventurer called Amelia, because a)dog, b)the pilot goggles portrait.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves


I came here to vote for old lady sex wizard but clearly the thread didn't need my help for this idea.

Crane Fist
Jun 5, 2012

Money and power through homicide, my lads.


This game is absolute dogshit and I am here for it

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

inscrutable horse
May 19, 2010

Parsing sage, rotating time

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female prodigal depraved occultist named Bertha.

If we can't handle this game at its worst, we don't deserve it at its best!

fluffyDeathbringer
Nov 1, 2017

Fluffy and Furious!


you already knew wtf was gonna go on here

ultrafilter posted:

Let's be a nihilistic elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.

fluffyDeathbringer fucked around with this message at 13:29 on May 31, 2020

Crazy Achmed
Mar 13, 2001



Slippery Tilde

You full well knew what was going to happen when you mentioned that sex wizards were a thing, didn't you

Only registered members can see post attachments!

drkeiscool
Aug 1, 2014


Soiled Meat

Crazy Achmed posted:

You full well knew what was going to happen when you mentioned that sex wizards were a thing, didn't you

I can personally confirm that evil king absolutely knew what was going to happen when he mentioned sex wizards

Ratoslov
Feb 15, 2012

Now prepare yourselves! You're the guests of honor at the Greatest Kung Fu Cannibal BBQ Ever!



I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.

jimmydalad
Sep 26, 2013

My face when others are unable to appreciate the

AGDQ 2018 Awful Block Survivor



Ratoslov posted:

I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.

Pretty much this. As fun as Nihilism is, a crazy old woman babbling about sexual occult things sounds too good to pass up.

MagusofStars
Mar 31, 2012




Ratoslov posted:

I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.
This..

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.


Doctor Rope

Ratoslov posted:

I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.

This.

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009

I GAIN POWER FROM EATING PEOPLE, JUST ASSUME I'M ALWAYS VOTING TO EAT PEOPLE



Nap Ghost

Ratoslov posted:

I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.

pumpinglemma
Apr 28, 2009

DD: Fondly regard abomination.



Ratoslov posted:

I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.
Agreed.

Jayme
Jul 16, 2008


Fun Shoe

Ratoslov posted:

I'm gonna dissent and say that Nihilistic seems like the no-fun-dialogue-options choice, so I suggest instead an esoteric elderly female depraved occultist named Bertha.

Yes.

TheGreatEvilKing
Mar 28, 2016



FYI:

Materiaiism is sex stuff
Esoterism is babbling about planar alignments and whatnot.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It is time for your viscera to see the light of day!

Changing my vote to materialism. The important part is to play a crazy old lady sex wizard, and I'm voting for whatever gets us there.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves


TheGreatEvilKing posted:

FYI:

Materiaiism is sex stuff
Esoterism is babbling about planar alignments and whatnot.

Just make the old lady sex wizard happen!

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

We'll make diamonds from their ashes. Take them into battle with us.

Craft a Diamond Dog diamond?
Nah.   Let's do it!




College Slice

Gridlocked posted:

Just make the old lady sex wizard happen!

Sindai
Jan 24, 2007
i want to achieve immortality through not dying

Nap Ghost

Gridlocked posted:

Just make the old lady sex wizard happen!

placid saviour
Apr 6, 2009


Gridlocked posted:

Just make the old lady sex wizard happen!

VolticSurge
Jul 23, 2013

Just your friendly neighborhood photobomb raptor.





Gridlocked posted:

Just make the old lady sex wizard happen!

Gort
Aug 18, 2003


Crazy Achmed posted:

You full well knew what was going to happen when you mentioned that sex wizards were a thing, didn't you



That's just gender-swapped George RR Martin

and therefore perfect for our purposes

Adjunct Professor Metis
Aug 1, 2014




I'm so glad everyone was already on board with old lady sex wizard.

Can I throw in a vote for the Phryne Fisher portrait?

EggsAisle
Dec 17, 2013

I get it! You're, uh...

I'm down for the adventures of magical demented Dr. Ruth. Look out for trolleys.

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FalloutFan56
Jan 3, 2020


Go for the old lady sex wizard.

FalloutFan56 fucked around with this message at 16:18 on Jun 2, 2020

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