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Lil Devil
Feb 21, 2008


I'll start: Coroporations using the term "contactless." Everything is "contactless." "Contactless" this and "contactless" that. SHUT THE gently caress UP!

What u got?

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The Human Crouton
Sep 20, 2002



I like the Dominos commercial where they advertise that they never touch your pizza once it's out of the oven, and it makes me wonder what their old procedure was that required touching the pizza once it was outside of the oven.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


The loving commercials with the Brady bunch boxes where they suck each otherís dicks on the internet. People saying amazing about everything. The sonic commercials with the stale bread sandwiches. People who canít get their eyebrows right.

Jeffrey Dahmer
May 21, 2017


Muldoon

I like High-C orange juice its not 100% but it has a nice taste and is refreshing. Comes in those small cartons.

Alucard
Mar 11, 2002


Pillbug

I hope this post finds you well

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

I thought it was time you had a new av so typed in random picture and this is what came up


In these difficult uncertain times, Soulless Corp LTD cares about you!

Lil Devil
Feb 21, 2008


Alucard posted:

I hope this post finds you well

No, I'm PO'd.

Flavahbeast
Jul 21, 2001

awoo

you can drink it without a lime wedge

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019



Not wearing a mask.

Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007

We're gonna have so much fun, we'll forget about how miserable we are, and how much life sucks, and how we're all gonna grow old and die someday.


고추장 DIVISION


Hulu/Youtube/something keeps giving me ads for Hinge which... not the fuckin' time my dudes!

WILDTURKEY101
Mar 7, 2005

Incredible

anything where anyone is smiling and happy and refuses to acknowledge that this is the living nightmare

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

I thought it was time you had a new av so typed in random picture and this is what came up


Nah man it's not that bad yet

stump collector
May 28, 2007

g4ndh1's edpi was 69, requiring an incredible 420cm to turn the other cheek

I wanna rock! I want to rock!!!

BIG TIT LIL NIP
Oct 5, 2005




ClamdestineBoyster posted:

The loving commercials with the Brady bunch boxes where they suck each other’s dicks on the internet. People saying amazing about everything. The sonic commercials with the stale bread sandwiches. People who can’t get their eyebrows right.

if this is real I take back everything bad I ever said about commercials

935
Jul 28, 2006

abcdefghijk
ELLAMENNO-P


"we're all in this together." Thanks cheez-itz, I guess?

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


I saw a Jeep commercial where they were offering 0%apr for 6 YEARS $0 due at signing then they changed it to 6 months 0% apr. What kind of deflation would allow them to do that?

Lil Devil
Feb 21, 2008


Thought of another one: Giant "Heroes Work Here" signs. People seem to be playing fast-and-loose with what it means to be a hero lately.

CJacobs
Apr 17, 2011

Keep on keeping on.


"In these troubled times" or similar has become the equivalent of when commercials say "the big game" to avoid having to pay to say "super bowl"

treasure bear
Dec 10, 2012



unprecedented, uncertain, new normal

The Human Crouton
Sep 20, 2002



I think it's suspicious that new commercials featuring social distancing themes are being produced at all. I don't believe that all of the people involved in the creation of the commercial are social distancing while making it.

Paranoid Peanut
Nov 13, 2009


'x' has become the new epicenter

Slippery
May 16, 2004



Muscles Boxcar

Fuckin hate 'new normal' and 'social distancing'

Big Mac
Jan 3, 2007

SOAP!

police brutality against peaceful protestors

EDIT oh yeah probably a funny one too, uhhhh, having to cross the street when i see someone walking down the sidewalk

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019



Yeah, it's physical loving distancing, social distancing is a terrible term

MrMidnight
Aug 2, 2006



The whole getting sick part sucks

Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007

We're gonna have so much fun, we'll forget about how miserable we are, and how much life sucks, and how we're all gonna grow old and die someday.


고추장 DIVISION


The Human Crouton posted:

I think it's suspicious that new commercials featuring social distancing themes are being produced at all. I don't believe that all of the people involved in the creation of the commercial are social distancing while making it.

I'm seein' a lot ones that are obviously quickly animated so... there's those at least?

BIG TIT LIL NIP
Oct 5, 2005




all this 'please go back to work' poo poo has got to stop.

Lil Devil
Feb 21, 2008


BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:

all this 'please go back to work' poo poo has got to stop.

Um, yeah, about that....

The VAST majority of Americans never stopped working. They worked through the entire pandemic. And no one gave a poo poo about them. But Susie Hairdresser or Barry Bartender gets asked nicely to go back to work and do their part, and "wokies" go nuts, talking about oppression and murdering Americans and all this bullshit. What about the millions upon millions who never stopped working and never complained about it?

1redflag
Feb 15, 2012
Probation
Can't post for 9 hours!


Lil Devil posted:

What about the millions upon millions who never stopped working and never complained about it?

Thank you for your service?

E. Also:

Colonel Cancer posted:

In these difficult uncertain times, Soulless Corp LTD cares about you!

Flunky
Jan 1, 2014



gently caress social distancing

BIG TIT LIL NIP
Oct 5, 2005




Lil Devil posted:

Um, yeah, about that....

The VAST majority of Americans never stopped working. They worked through the entire pandemic. And no one gave a poo poo about them. But Susie Hairdresser or Barry Bartender gets asked nicely to go back to work and do their part, and "wokies" go nuts, talking about oppression and murdering Americans and all this bullshit. What about the millions upon millions who never stopped working and never complained about it?

yes queen!!!!!!!!!!!

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019



BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:

all this 'please go back to work' poo poo has got to stop.

No poo poo.
Started a waiter job juuuuust before the lockdown hit, 2 weeks later the place is closed. Got on the CERB. (that's the canadian rona $ relief)
The owner made the news recently where they were showcasing their approach to reopening and the chef was quoted saying "I'm surprised, I thought people were eager to go back to work." and this gem "I promise I will get you all off the CERB".

Why of course, we cannot wait to go back to making your business function for minimum wage* while you literally yell at all your staff constantly for no reason, all the time.

Eat a bankrupcy you awful c**t.

Thanks for listening.



*: this is a place where a table for 2 will leave with at least a 500$ bill.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?


The Human Crouton posted:

I like the Dominos commercial where they advertise that they never touch your pizza once it's out of the oven, and it makes me wonder what their old procedure was that required touching the pizza once it was outside of the oven.

The driver steals a slice and tries to push it back together

SilvergunSuperman
Aug 6, 2010



Lil Devil posted:

Um, yeah, about that....

The VAST majority of Americans never stopped working. They worked through the entire pandemic. And no one gave a poo poo about them. But Susie Hairdresser or Barry Bartender gets asked nicely to go back to work and do their part, and "wokies" go nuts, talking about oppression and murdering Americans and all this bullshit. What about the millions upon millions who never stopped working and never complained about it?

Lmao

5er
Jun 1, 2000




Also tired of hearing 'uncertain'.

Also tired of hearing 'unprecedented', and then in the next breath they discuss the budget cuts that are all running along the same lines as the 2009 economy crash. uNpReCeDenTeD indeed.

BIG TIT LIL NIP
Oct 5, 2005




Bronze Fonz posted:

No poo poo.
Started a waiter job juuuuust before the lockdown hit, 2 weeks later the place is closed. Got on the CERB. (that's the canadian rona $ relief)
The owner made the news recently where they were showcasing their approach to reopening and the chef was quoted saying "I'm surprised, I thought people were eager to go back to work." and this gem "I promise I will get you all off the CERB".

Why of course, we cannot wait to go back to making your business function for minimum wage* while you literally yell at all your staff constantly for no reason, all the time.

Eat a bankrupcy you awful c**t.

Thanks for listening.



*: this is a place where a table for 2 will leave with at least a 500$ bill.

my girlfriends boss has her on the phone telling her how everythings cool now, they went out to eat at a local restaurant and everyone has masks on so it's all good. I had to beg her not to go back. she didnt and were not dead yet hell yeah. same boss tricked her into not refilling for unemployment. hell yeah bosses own, thank you job creators

Lil Devil
Feb 21, 2008


BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:

my girlfriends boss has her on the phone telling her how everythings cool now, they went out to eat at a local restaurant and everyone has masks on so it's all good. I had to beg her not to go back. she didnt and were not dead yet hell yeah. same boss tricked her into not refilling for unemployment. hell yeah bosses own, thank you job creators

TBH, your GF doesn't sound too smart if she got tricked by a some retarded restaurant boss twice in as many conversations.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Slippery
May 16, 2004



Muscles Boxcar

Lil Devil posted:

TBH, your GF doesn't sound too smart if she got tricked by a some retarded restaurant boss twice in as many conversations.

If you wanna waste ten bucks just send it to me dude

Ez8
Aug 5, 2004


Stay safe out there.

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Julias
Jun 24, 2012




The Human Crouton posted:

I like the Dominos commercial where they advertise that they never touch your pizza once it's out of the oven, and it makes me wonder what their old procedure was that required touching the pizza once it was outside of the oven.

They licked all the flavor off of the pizza

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