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vanisher

Offers shall be presented on the belly of a large catfish, face down. The recipient shall wrestle the fish to retrieve the offer. If accepted, the recipient shall throw their hat in the air and strum their jaw harp.

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Luvcow

One day nearer spring
before we can authorize this marriage license we'll need you to find a closer connection on your family trees

vanisher

In accordance with Missouri law, all notarization shall only occur upon riverboat while intoxicated.



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
In Missouri it shall be permitted to dig your neighbor's Greebmas Hole, but only if they agree.

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
real post i live 90 minutes from Lee's Summit MO. let me know if u have legal questions about missourah



tyvm Justa Dandelion and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

In Missouri it shall be permitted to dig your neighbor's Greebmas Hole, but only if they agree.

greebmas laws here tend to be severe. NEVER covet ur neighbor's hole for example. country justice can be cruel



tyvm Justa Dandelion and Ravenous Scoot

Manifisto


a contract is invalidated if either party says it "mi-zur-EE" instead of "mi-zur-AH." the mispronouncing party must spend the night in a barrel of eels.


ty nesamdoom!

vanisher

Legal documents shall be certified by dipping a large snake in ink and pressing the snake firmly on the bottom left corner of each document. The snakeprint shall not overlap the text (documents shall be prepared with a blank box marked "STAMP")



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext

Manifisto


marriage certificates must be in the form of one party passing a note that says "Will you marry me? Y / N" and the other party circling the appropriate answer.


ty nesamdoom!

vanisher

If outlined in the contract, all Escrow services for the transfer of real property or assets shall be handled by trained Alligator. The buying party (Aligatee) shall deposit one (1) large bird for consumption as a show of good faith for a contract to be valid.



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext

very nice i like
In the state of Missouri all legal counsel must be provided within an enclosed swamp bubble

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
Rules agreed upon during drinking games shall be legally binding for 24 hours after the actual drinking game has concluded. These drinking game rules shall be enforceable in a court of law **takes two drinks for saying the word "drink" and has to do two more for saying the word again, twice**

Joey McChrist

before gaining insurance for your vehicle in Lee's Summit you are required to win a Mongolian-style oil wrestling match on top of a hill with a man named Lee

vanisher

Missouri contract law requires written terms to be in traditional Foghorn Leghorn



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext

Brute Squad

Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human race

privateering on the lake of the ozarks may only be done under letters of mark. Mark's that one old guy at the end of the bar that knows all the best fishing spots.

vanisher

Brute Squad posted:

privateering on the lake of the ozarks may only be done under letters of mark. Mark's that one old guy at the end of the bar that knows all the best fishing spots.

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

vanisher posted:

Missouri contract law requires written terms to be in traditional Foghorn Leghorn



tyvm Justa Dandelion and Ravenous Scoot

Manifisto


vanisher posted:

Missouri contract law requires written terms to be in traditional Foghorn Leghorn

Brute Squad posted:

privateering on the lake of the ozarks may only be done under letters of mark. Mark's that one old guy at the end of the bar that knows all the best fishing spots.


ty nesamdoom!

Thunder Moose

S.J.C.

Brute Squad posted:

privateering on the lake of the ozarks may only be done under letters of mark. Mark's that one old guy at the end of the bar that knows all the best fishing spots.

lol

Twenty Four


Manifisto posted:

spend the night in a barrel of eels.

lol


Manifisto posted:

marriage certificates must be in the form of one party passing a note that says "Will you marry me? Y / N" and the other party circling the appropriate answer.

double lol

Twenty Four


lmao just googled and found out that despite having the St. Louis Cardinals, aka Redbirds, the official state bird of Missouri is the Bluebird. What a land of conflicts!

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Twenty Four posted:

lmao just googled and found out that despite having the St. Louis Cardinals, aka Redbirds, the official state bird of Missouri is the Bluebird. What a land of conflicts!

it's illegal to drive barefoot here. women can drive a motor vehicle, but only if her husband walks in front of the vehicle waving special flags so motorists will give a wide berth. he is allowed to do so while barefoot thank god



tyvm Justa Dandelion and Ravenous Scoot

Luvcow

One day nearer spring
raccoons are accepted as legal tender

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Luvcow posted:

raccoons are accepted as legal tender

extra tender if u use a crock pot



tyvm Justa Dandelion and Ravenous Scoot

Manifisto


Luvcow posted:

raccoons are accepted as legal tender

prepuce repurposed posted:

extra tender if u use a crock pot


ty nesamdoom!

Joey McChrist

Luvcow posted:

raccoons are accepted as legal tender


prepuce repurposed posted:

extra tender if u use a crock pot

Twenty Four


Luvcow posted:

raccoons are accepted as legal tender


prepuce repurposed posted:

extra tender if u use a crock pot

lol

vanisher

Luvcow posted:

raccoons are accepted as legal tender


prepuce repurposed posted:

extra tender if u use a crock pot



Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext

nut

Luvcow posted:

raccoons are accepted as legal tender


Jaguars!


You are under arrest for desecratin' of corpses

You have the right for people to remain silent during your storehs

Any jokes you tell may be used as evidence in court or at parties

You got the right to call yuh dog before we ask you any questions.

Y' have the right to have a goat farmer with you during questioning, 'cause they're the smartest kinda farmer. If you can't afford a goat farmer, one may be appointed for you

If y'all decide to answer questions now without a goat farmer present, you have the right to choose the radio station (They all country & western).

Joey McChrist

when you're found guilty you achieve penance by dueling the warden in the river, wielding a sturgeon like a meaty club

szkud

you can only either dual-wield or dual-class. the fantasy worlds maintain a strict balance and equality to counter the state's realities

~(‾▿‾)~

feedback loop
dual wielders and welders alike must defend themselves in the court of law

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
Missouri is the "Show Me" State. This means it shall be legal to utter the phrase "Whip it out", "Oh yeah? Well whip it out, then" and "I don't believe you, let me see that thing!" Even if it IS in a public area such as a restaurant (State of Missouri vs Chuck E. Cheese).

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

very nice i like

prepuce repurposed posted:

extra tender if u use a crock pot

lol

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

Prof. Crocodile

  1. A party may legally discharge firearms at (or in the direction of) a second party, if'n they had it comin'.
    1. This law shall not be construed to encompass second parties who:
      • Were only funnin'
      • Didn't mean nobody no harm no how

Joey McChrist

Jeffrey, drenched in sweat, face frozen in a strained rictus as he performs the 12 Labors of Missouri

Manifisto


Joey McChrist posted:

Jeffrey, drenched in sweat, face frozen in a strained rictus as he performs the 12 Labors of Missouri


ty nesamdoom!

Barking Gecko

Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."
In civil lawsuits, the parties may elect to have the case decided by trial by combat.
Each party must be represented by an attorney. The attorneys are only allowed to use yellow legal pads, ledger books, and volumes of the Southwestern Reporter (1st series) as weapons.

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nut

judge: defendant? plaintiff? sorry we don’t use big city words our cases are fought between finders and keepers

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