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Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 19 hours!


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R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007


he was also my dad so you beyter watch your mouth..

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.


Bread Liar


Wouldn't Jesus be Christian after the desert? He truly believed in himself, no?

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 19 hours!


DeadFatDuckFat posted:

Wouldn't Jesus be Christian after the desert? He truly believed in himself, no?

How can you follow yourself? Jesus didn't believe in himself, he believed in his father

20 Blunts
Jan 21, 2017



"nail proof" is grey area

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 19 hours!


20 Blunts posted:

"nail proof" is grey area

please explain what you mean

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

In a world gone mad,
we will not spank the monkey,
but the monkey will spank us.


Nice, Alan 00X. IMO your best post ever.

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 19 hours!


BigBadSteve posted:

Nice, Alan 00X. IMO your best post ever.

thanks

R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007


Spinz
Jan 7, 2020

Party Time! Be excellent to each other.



Christ, what an rear end in a top hat

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 19 hours!


I was actually raised as a Seventh Day Adventist. The religion is has a huge disaster relief department and is starting to own Hospitals.

Pinche Rudo
Feb 8, 2005



Did Jesus eat rear end?

Cowman
Feb 14, 2006

Beware the cow



hung well

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

Yams Fan

why do people think jesus was brown-skinned? just because he lived in the middle-east?
in the earliest depiction of jesus, he actually had a donkey for a head

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006



Mrs. Sexual
Feb 3, 2020


Allan, Jesus was fictional.

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 19 hours!


Mrs. Sexual posted:

Allan, Jesus was fictional.

literally wrong. Jesus is a historical figure even if you don't believe in his Divinity

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat


Cubone posted:

why do people think jesus was brown-skinned? just because he lived in the middle-east?
in the earliest depiction of jesus, he actually had a donkey for a head

Jesus was into stuff like crap and fart. There's a book written by Robert Heinlein where Jesus comes out of an egg and Mary laid the egg and it was made out of crap and when she laid the egg it made a fart and the experience imprinted onto Jesus.

I remember studying Irish literature and there was a lot of stuff about how protestants loved eggs. Easter egg hunts are about finding the crap eggs Jesus was born in that's why the eggs are chocolate.

In my dreams I see Jesus Christ and he floats towards me on top of a yellow cloud, his features are Asian and he always says something about Bohemia and nude guys who are wearing sneakers. Sometimes he looks at his feet and his toes are all bent up from playing soccer.

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.


Bread Liar

Alan 00X posted:

I was actually raised as a Seventh Day Adventist. The religion is has a huge disaster relief department and is starting to own Hospitals.

Are you vegetarian? Also, sorry about all your wasted Saturdays

Blitter
Mar 16, 2011


Alan 00X posted:

literally wrong. Jesus is a historical figure even if you don't believe in his Divinity

Thanks for your profoundly stupid opinion (s).

Pennywise the Frown
May 10, 2010



Upset Trowel

Spinz posted:

Christ, what an rear end in a top hat

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat


Blitter posted:

Thanks for your profoundly stupid opinion (s).

I think you may be stupid about this subject. There are texts going back two thousand years that prove that someone around that time was setting up gay book clubs in Rome centered around Marxism.

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

by Lowtax


Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat



That's not accurate, you should be reported and probated for posting something like this that is wrong. I will report you now

Zeniel
Oct 18, 2013



But either way, his hair was long and luxurious. Although both use different leading shampoo brands obviously.

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

by Lowtax


Blitter posted:

Thanks for your profoundly stupid opinion (s).

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

Yams Fan

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

Jesus was into stuff like crap and fart. There's a book written by Robert Heinlein where Jesus comes out of an egg and Mary laid the egg and it was made out of crap and when she laid the egg it made a fart and the experience imprinted onto Jesus.

I remember studying Irish literature and there was a lot of stuff about how protestants loved eggs. Easter egg hunts are about finding the crap eggs Jesus was born in that's why the eggs are chocolate.

In my dreams I see Jesus Christ and he floats towards me on top of a yellow cloud, his features are Asian and he always says something about Bohemia and nude guys who are wearing sneakers. Sometimes he looks at his feet and his toes are all bent up from playing soccer.

what?

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat



I think you may be stupid about this subject.

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

by Lowtax


Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

Jesus was into stuff like crap and fart. There's a book written by Robert Heinlein where Jesus comes out of an egg and Mary laid the egg and it was made out of crap and when she laid the egg it made a fart and the experience imprinted onto Jesus.

I remember studying Irish literature and there was a lot of stuff about how protestants loved eggs. Easter egg hunts are about finding the crap eggs Jesus was born in that's why the eggs are chocolate.

In my dreams I see Jesus Christ and he floats towards me on top of a yellow cloud, his features are Asian and he always says something about Bohemia and nude guys who are wearing sneakers. Sometimes he looks at his feet and his toes are all bent up from playing soccer.

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

Yams Fan

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

I think you may be stupid about this subject.

disagree

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat


Cubone posted:

disagree

I dont know what to say about that. Maybe you have a point but I don't think most people will agree

nut
Jul 30, 2019



if both of the jesuses (jesi?) in the op did it they would give birth to Yanni i dunno which one would get preggers tho

Pennywise the Frown
May 10, 2010



Upset Trowel

nut posted:

if both of the jesuses (jesi?) in the op did it they would give birth to Yanni i dunno which one would get preggers tho

You still have the best av on the forums.

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat


nut posted:

if both of the jesuses (jesi?) in the op did it they would give birth to Yanni i dunno which one would get preggers tho

I don't know about that. Some people in New York believe Jesus was fried up on a griddle lengthwise. The whole crucifixion thing was just made up because people didn't want to think Jesus died laying down on a griddle instead of standing up. It would have been undignified. They removed the book of Enoch from the Bible for similar reasons because Enoch was wearing blue jeans in heaven and using cellphones.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

Don't get my name wrong,
If you want to touch me there.

Jesus was not a Test Cricketer. As Nazareth did not have Test status at that time.

Which is a pity, as I have heard he was a very elegant Left Handed batsmen, and could bowl handy off-spin.

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat


BrigadierSensible posted:

Jesus was not a Test Cricketer. As Nazareth did not have Test status at that time.

Which is a pity, as I have heard he was a very elegant Left Handed batsmen, and could bowl handy off-spin.

Some people would agree but you'll find little support on here. A lot of people stupid about the subject. I heard his fingers were bent from the sport like a basketball player's.

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

Yams Fan

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

I dont know what to say about that. Maybe you have a point but I don't think most people will agree
disagree

R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007


the FBI has a 2,500 page dossier on Jesus, but you didn't hear it from me

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Feb 17, 2011

meat


R.L. Stine posted:

the FBI has a 2,500 page dossier on Jesus, but you didn't hear it from me

There's no support for that. The only US agency with comprehensive information on Jesus is the private company called the NFL, they've got foot pictures of Jesus dating back two thousand years. Some of the pictures there are oil on his feet, some are just water and other times his heels are really cracked. One picture has someone using a ped egg on his feet and eating the dried skin that looks like flour and had the texture of the inside of a Cadbury Creme Egg. When Jesus died an impression of his feet was left on a shroud. Some people argue his feet were more important than his words and it's hard to argue with that.

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R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007


no one can deny it, jesus stepped on a lot of things in his day and you have to wonder what else he might have stepped on before getting owned

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