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Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


WWE Champions - Click for pictures/details etc.

Raw: WWE Champion Drew McIntyre | Raw Women's Champion Sasha Banks | United States Champion Apollo Crews | Tag Champions The Street Profits | Womenís Tag Champions Bayley & Sasha Banks | 24/7 Champion Shelton Benjamin
Smackdown: Universal Champion Braun Strowman | Womenís Champion Bayley | Intercontinental Champion AJ Styles | Tag Champions Shinsuke Nakamura & Cesaro | Womenís Tag Champions Bayley & Sasha Banks
NXT: NXT Champion Keith Lee | Womenís Champion Io Shirai | NXT North American Champion Vacant | Cruiserweight Champion Jordan Devlin | Tag Champions Imperium
NXT UK: UK Champion WALTER | Womenís Champion Kay Lee Ray | Tag Team Champions Gallus
____________________________

Prior Discussion Threads for 2020:
January | February | March | April | May | June | July |

My Favorite WWE Related Posts for 2020:
January | February | March | April | May | June | July | August |

____________________________

Raw Results 8/3:
  • Detailed Results here.
  • Apollo Crews retains the US title over MVP after MVP gets distracted by off-and-on technical difficulties from the light setup; post-match MVP demands a rematch for Summerslam
  • Asuka interrupts a Bayley+Sasha Banks video package, Shayna Bazsler interrupts a Bayley+Sasha promo and punches out Sasha
  • Kevin Owens invites Ruby Riott on his show, then surprises her with Liv Morgan. Ruby asks for forgiveness, the Iiconics interrupt
  • Liv and Ruby defeat the Iiconics; post-match Ruby saves Liv from a beatdown
  • Charley Caruso points out a production box that got tipped over and destroyed; MVP is pissed
  • Drew McIntyre shittalks Randy Orton while Orton and Ric Flair look on from the ramp
  • Flair goads Owens into a match with Orton next week
  • Nia Jax refuses to apologize for assaulting producer Pat Buck last week during a brawl with Shayna; Buck suspends Nia indefinitely without pay, Nia kicks his rear end some more
  • Akira Tozawa wins the 24/7 title in a triple threat against R-Truth and Shelton Benjamin (this was with 24/7 rules suspended so they could have a normal match); post-match Tozawa runs away because 24/7 rules are officially unsuspended after the conclusion of a 24/7 title match
  • Shane McMahon is in a warehouse with a ring with no ropes and a black apron cover; at 10PM Eastern is Raw Underground
  • Dominick challenges Seth Rollins to a match at Summerslam
  • Sasha defeats Shayna by DQ in under 3 minutes because Asuka (a person not involved in the match) attacks Bayley (also a person not involved in the match)
  • Asuka wants a rematch with Sasha at Summerslam; Shayna wants Asuka to win so she can beat her for the belt; Sasha gives Asuka the rematch if Asuka beats Bayley next week
  • Shane promotes Raw Underground again, this time with strippers dancing in the background
  • Shane shows this Lucha Underground/Fight Club knockoff with strippers in the background where PC geeks were squashed by a Samoan in worked MMA with WWE-match camera cuts throughout; Samoa Joe likes the concept, the thread was utterly befuddled https://streamable.com/hnuguj
  • Angel Garza defeats Angelo Dawkins after Dawkins gets distracted by Montez Ford collapsing at ringside after drinking from a red solo cup
  • Andrade defeats Montez after Montez collapses again
  • Shane goes back to Raw Underground, with Erik from the Viking Raiders who dominates multiple scrubs https://streamable.com/g1gygb
  • Bianca Belair attacks Zelina Vega backstage after Dawkins is informed Montez's drink may have been drugged
  • Security cam footage from earlier of 5 people dressed like antifa protesters throwing molotovs at production generators outside the Performance Center
  • MVP is pissed hearing about the continuous glitches, doesn't think it's a coincidence it all happens the same day as Raw Underground's debut
  • Seth berates commentator Tom Phillips and sends Murphy after him, Samoa Joe prevents them. When Seth and Murphy try to attack Joe, Dominick blindsides them with a kendo stick and chases them off. Seth accepts the Summerslam challenge
  • Shane goes back to Raw Underground one last time, with Dolph Ziggler dominating a scrub. MVP, Shelton Benjamin and Lashley show up and take over
  • That's it, that's the show
  • Who were the antifa people
  • GDT Discussion here.
____________________________

CJ2 here to say I'm a constant fuckup who might have accidentally edited out a whole last month's recap, so uh give me a minute here...Last month's recap:
  • NXT's Great American Bash ended with Keith Lee defeating Adam Cole to become double champ (NXT champ and North American champ). Two weeks later he announced vacating the North American title because he didn't want to actually be double champ I guess?
  • The next North American champ will be decided via a ladder match at the Takeover later this month, participants decided via various triple threats. Qualified thus far for the match: Bronson Reed and Dexter Lumis
  • Io Shirai will next defend her women's title at that Takeover against either Dakota Kai or Rhea Ripley
  • Karrion Kross has his sights set on Keith Lee and his world title. Maybe that's a Takeover match too?
  • Extreme Rules was a show that occurred. Cesaro and Nakamura became SD tag champs! Aside from that...
  • "Seth Rollins defeated Rey Mysterio in an Eye for an Eye match. The match came to an abrupt end with Rey shielding a cartoonishly cheap eyeball prop (a sharpied ping-pong ball?) against his eye socket, and Seth vomiting. You think I'm lying, but I'm not.
    Asuka (C) vs. Sasha Banks for the Raw Women's Title....ended? Bayley stole the ref's shirt after he was misted by Asuka, hit her with a belt and counted the pinfall for Sasha, then grabbed the belts, forced the timekeeper to ring the bell and declared Sasha the winner. No idea what the official ruling was.
    An update on Rey Mysterio was given that maybe he'll still be able to see okay after all.
    The non-title Swamp Match between Braun Strowman and Bray Wyatt was a godawful mess and ended with The Fiend emerging from the swamp after a lame non-finish ending where both Bray and Braun disappeared into the water. Words can't express how awful this match was."
  • Summerslam will be taking place this month! At the Performance Center, not in Boston as originally planned because coronavirus is still a thing, regardless of if they acknowledge it
  • Randy Orton punted Big Show and is now challenging Drew McIntyre for the WWE title at Summerslam. The Drew/Dolph feud might finally be over? Maybe?
  • The Fiend Bray Wyatt attacked Alexa on the most recent SD, and was extremely creepy while doing it. The Bray/Braun feud is not finally over, unfortunately
  • Seth Rollins, in the aftermath of maybe temporarily maybe permanently blinding Rey Mysterio, is now in a feud with Rey's son Dominick who has never had a match before
  • Apollo Crews is United States champ! He mysteriously disappeared for a few weeks due to a reason that was definitely not coronavirus, and was unable to defend at Extreme Rules against MVP, so MVP is also maybe United States champ? They both have belts. I don't loving know
  • Street Profits finally moved on from a feud with the Viking Raiders, and will now defend the Raw tag titles at Summerslam against Andrade and Angel Garza
  • Kairi Sane fulfilled her last contractual obligations with the company and is on her way back to Japan to retire. With a clean pin over Bayley it had looked like she managed to pull off the unthinkable and have a great exit from the company
  • Sasha Banks became the new Raw women's champ the following week after Asuka got counted out trying to save Kairi from...a normal backstage beatdown, which was how they actually decided to depict her exit from the company. Easy come, easy go
  • Big E is going to try to be a singles champion. He has the full support of his friends in the New Day. It's good to see friends being actual friends to each other
  • Naomi deserves better
  • Matt Riddle, an accused literal rapist, does not
  • Raw ratings continued to hit rock bottom
  • The company continued to make all the money despite it
  • Seth Rollins thinks you should stop complaining https://talksport.com/sport/wrestli...-vince-mcmahon/
  • Nobody knew tested positive for corona! That we know of, because talent have previously been yelled at for making their diagnosis voluntarily public!
  • NXT UK might still be a thing! Maybe?
____________________________

Somebody fucked around with this message at 14:40 on Aug 4, 2020

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Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


Reserved for my favorite WWE-related posts for THIS month.




FullMetalJackoff posted:

I hit my tolerance limit for Kevin Dunn camera work a decade ago. Now I add it to ruin the classics.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZXMiAJspuI

quote:

Lid posted:

oh god its the loving undisputed era isnt it

Eat My Fuc posted:

finally someone to stand up for the little guys

quote:

Davros1 posted:

Ratings are down ... what can they do to boast them?

https://twitter.com/WWE/status/1290341665862033408?s=20

Gumball Gumption posted:

This just means they're going to lose a person from the 50 plus demo.

Jerusalem fucked around with this message at 11:18 on Aug 4, 2020

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008



wwe posters of the month? Sounds good

Maigius
Jun 29, 2013

THUNDERDOME LOSER


Stupid thought, but if Punk rear end Vid was taken down for some reason, what would it mean? Punk's returning to being an active wrestler? The apocalypse is happening?

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"


Maigius posted:

Stupid thought, but if Punk rear end Vid was taken down for some reason, what would it mean? Punk's returning to being an active wrestler? The apocalypse is happening?

Seth Rollins
Oct 24, 2001

i'll always take care of you


Muldoon

the wwe stinks. thread closed. Chris James 2, please close this thread. it's been closed.

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008






Gravy Boat 2k

Please give a 6er to the WWE

ARMBAR A COP
Nov 24, 2007

HURRAH! ANOTHER YEAR, SURELY THIS ONE WILL BE BETTER THAN THE LAST; THE INEXORABLE MARCH OF PROGRESS WILL LEAD US ALL TO HAPPINESS


Y'all ever think that you can kick Undertaker in the knees and actually beat him up by doing that?

Intruder
Mar 5, 2003

Another skit?!



Has Braun even given any kind of recent indication he gives a poo poo about Alexa?

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

Excuse me, I'd like to
speak to the moderator




J-Ru, it is very disrespectful of you to not refer to my friend by his chosen name. From now on please only call him Shorty G as he prefers

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


Rarity posted:

J-Ru, it is very disrespectful of you to not refer to my friend by his chosen name. From now on please only call him Shorty G as he prefers

Superface Baron Corbin called him Chad on Smackdown so that's his name again

Gonzo McFee
Jun 19, 2010


Intruder posted:

Has Braun even given any kind of recent indication he gives a poo poo about Alexa?

He got tricked by a ghost

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


Intruder posted:

Has Braun even given any kind of recent indication he gives a poo poo about Alexa?

Yes, in the Swamp Fight she appeared as a hallucination to try and tempt Braun into giving up the fight.

Taintrunner
Apr 10, 2017

Sorry to undo the effort of paying a domestic abuser $10 to own this poster, but I am going to lose my dang mind if I keep seeing multiple posters who appear to be Baloogan.

With love,
a mod



Kane is on track to have killed more children than Chris Benoit before the yearís end, fast-tracking him for the WWE Hall of Fame.

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010



Taintrunner posted:

Kane is on track to have killed more children than Chris Benoit before the yearís end, fast-tracking him for the WWE Hall of Fame.

Gross post

Cerebral Bore
Apr 21, 2010



Fun Shoe

More like gross reality.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

#RXT REVOLUTION~!
2000



future scoopin'...





Grimey Drawer

The Fiend attacking Alexa was on my Youtube feed and I was actually kind of intrigued despite the uncomfortable imagery of the actual attack. Was this going to be a Nikki Cross vs Fiend feud? What an interesting notion given Nikki's instability gimmick and the concept of the Funhouse match. They could invent an entire backstory for Nikki and how she fell in with a weird anarchist cult like Sanity, give Killian Dain some screentime. Setting it up around the moment when Nikki is overwhelmed by doubt after losing a title shot gives Bray a perfect point of mental attack, and it'd be easy to reflect on the weird-rear end storyline that was her friendship with Alexa and how for so long Alexa just seemed to be using her but in the end it turned out she was a true friend and Nikki's faith was rewarded. You could go with the "that friendship you endured so much abuse to prove was real only made you weak," angle, or a "the friendship was a lie all along, she was just playing an even deeper game to use you than you knew," angle. There's a lot of potential there, and the whole nature of a Funhouse Match being cinematic/a supernatural mental battle means there's no reason why you COULDN'T do it intergender.

Then I remembered that the Fiend is feuding with Braun and that means that this is all just to make Alexa into a prop because they referenced that she was Braun's friend in that tag tournament.

I really like the Fiend. I honestly, truly do, despite everything. I like Bray as a wrestler in general. But they make it really loving hard.

The Croc
Dec 19, 2004

A-well-a everybody's heard about the bird!

OH YEAH!



Jerusalem posted:

Yes, in the Swamp Fight she appeared as a hallucination to try and tempt Braun into giving up the fight.

However there never was any fight so braun was unable to give up.

blunt
Jul 7, 2005





Maigius posted:

Stupid thought, but if Punk rear end Vid was taken down for some reason, what would it mean? Punk's returning to being an active wrestler? The apocalypse is happening?

Yeah, the rear end vid is now effectively a contract canary.

cunny mcalister
Mar 21, 2004
Somehow less than meets the eye.

ARMBAR A COP posted:

Y'all ever think that you can kick Undertaker in the knees and actually beat him up by doing that?

For about 20 years now.

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

Cabana's legal advice?
I'm bourgeoisie.
I... hit the shitty
firemans carry knee.






One thing wrong in the op

This week nxt and aew combined DID beat the third hour of raw. There are now more people watching wrestling wednesdays than on monday for an hour at least.

JUNGLE BOY
Sep 22, 2019





I stayed up late last night thinking about how The Fiend using the ďhurtĒ glove on Alexa Bliss was one of the most symbolic and chilling scenes since The Joker blew up the hospitals in Dark Knight.

RealFoxy
May 11, 2011

King of the Pirates?




I fell asleep watching old WWE shows and had a dream where the APA were gambling at a table with Authors of Pain & Paul Ellering who were cleaning the floor with them in a game of poker. The APA had run out of money but were drunk and wanted to keep going so they both looked at the door and bet the entire APA business and then ended up losing that too so the AoP started doing APA bits with the APA occasionally showing up backstage to try and win their money back

Why can't WWE actually be that entertaining, they've got so much backstage poo poo they could be doing.

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010



RealFoxy posted:

Why can't WWE actually be that entertaining

Vince

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

Excuse me, I'd like to
speak to the moderator




RealFoxy posted:

I fell asleep watching old WWE shows and had a dream where the APA were gambling at a table with Authors of Pain & Paul Ellering who were cleaning the floor with them in a game of poker. The APA had run out of money but were drunk and wanted to keep going so they both looked at the door and bet the entire APA business and then ended up losing that too so the AoP started doing APA bits with the APA occasionally showing up backstage to try and win their money back

Why can't WWE actually be that entertaining, they've got so much backstage poo poo they could be doing.

This would be a real good use of AoP ffs

Julio Cruz
May 19, 2006



the Authors Protection Agency would be loving sweet

give them the same theme music as well

Pope Corky the IX
Dec 18, 2006

What are you looking at?

Can anyone explain why the gently caress they called up AoP and immediately got rid of Paul Ellering? Almost the entire gimmick was listening to him solemnly read from the Book of Pain for a while before sending out these two beasts that would beat the poo poo out of anyone and everyone while screaming at them in French.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

Excuse me, I'd like to
speak to the moderator




Pope Corky the IX posted:

Can anyone explain why the gently caress they called up AoP and immediately got rid of Paul Ellering? Almost the entire gimmick was listening to him solemnly read from the Book of Pain for a while before sending out these two beasts that would beat the poo poo out of anyone and everyone while screaming at them in French.

Managers are bad (unless they pee their pants, then they're good)

Pope Corky the IX
Dec 18, 2006

What are you looking at?

Or blondes Vince thinks will eventually let him gently caress them.

EDIT: I mean, I'm not wrong on thinking this was a big part of the whole Rusev/Lana thing? Vince originally got pissed at the social media announcement that they were engaged, and then spent years making Rusev look loving pathetic on television, then released him, believing that Lana would eventually see the error of her ways and spend a night or two with the genetic jackhammer.

Pope Corky the IX fucked around with this message at 12:52 on Aug 1, 2020

RealFoxy
May 11, 2011

King of the Pirates?




Rarity posted:

Managers are bad (unless they pee their pants, then they're good)
Vince also thought he was too old, while he continues to roll out the shambling corpse of Ric Flair

Golden Bee
Dec 24, 2009

I came here to chew bubblegum and quote 'They Live', and I'm... at an impasse.


Pope Corky the IX posted:

Can anyone explain why the gently caress they called up AoP and immediately got rid of Paul Ellering? Almost the entire gimmick was listening to him solemnly read from the Book of Pain for a while before sending out these two beasts that would beat the poo poo out of anyone and everyone while screaming at them in French.

Allegedly he didnít want to travel, but a few years later he joined AEW and traveled every week with Shawn spears, so who knows.

The Senator Giroux
Jul 9, 2006
Dead Ringer



Golden Bee posted:

Allegedly he didnít want to travel, but a few years later he joined AEW and traveled every week with Shawn spears, so who knows.

Thatís Blanchard not Ellering.

And Ellering said like the week the whole ďdoesnít want to travelĒ stuff came out that it wasnít true.

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.




I like the idea that Paul Ellering was also travelling with Shawn Spears just to hang out.

Blaise330
Aug 13, 2007

I don't know what I just saw.

Shorty G joined Corbin

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPknZ3Lk4xU


Like 60% of the roster has been a Corbin henchman. There's been twice as many Corbin henchmen as members of DX

Dacap
Jul 8, 2008

ME BOSS
YOU NOT




Golden Bee posted:

Allegedly he didnít want to travel, but a few years later he joined AEW and traveled every week with Shawn spears, so who knows.

Ellering has disputed that I think so I think Vince just didnít want to use him and they immediately realized AOP couldnít promo well so they course corrected with Maverick

Blaise330
Aug 13, 2007

I don't know what I just saw.

Dacap posted:

Ellering has disputed that I think so I think Vince just didnít want to use him and they immediately realized AOP couldnít promo well so they course corrected with Maverick

Their backstage promos where they spoke their native language were great. You know I didn't realize it but in more "WWE foes become friends" its ironic AoP won the titles from Seth a year before they joined him.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012

plz remember that it was ~ME~ who told you that everything you like is actually really not good, because I knew all along.





SD 1.892mil, lowest audience in a month

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.


https://twitter.com/WrestlingNewsCo...1959567360?s=20

what

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into trouble.


This is the man who made Trish Stratus bark like a dog

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The Senator Giroux
Jul 9, 2006
Dead Ringer




Im all for a Dallas Raines gimmick

FLATHAND
POINT
FIST

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