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Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

CynCyanide posted:

I have a coworker who will not eat any kind of fruit and will tell you about it at length. "It's a texture issue," he claims. Other times he claims it's because he got so excited to meet Goofy at Disney World that he barfed up the pineapple chunks he'd had with breakfast and hasn't been able to eat fruit since. There was a bowl of oranges at an office party once and he cringed away from it like a vampire from the sun. Obviously he's also a big attention whore.
You keep writing "he" when talking about my wife.

Even though there are several different textures to raw fruit, mine won't even consider cooked fruit. Like ok, if you're not a fan of raw apples, but apple pie or applesauce?

Having heard this for so many years, my best theory is that "watery wet + sweet" is the offending texture. It's not "dry/milk fatty + sweet" like all of the pastries, candy bars, and ice cream she eats.

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Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

EorayMel posted:

People do that?
I was like this for a long time.

Growing up, my parents owned a small grocery store and our house was attached to it. Among the biggest problems of being a teenager with unfettered access to junk food was from the age of 9-18, I'd only drink Mt. Dew, Verifine fruit punch, and the occasional milk. I'd drink water on infrequent camping trips once or twice a year but that was it. If the liquid wasn't sweet, I wouldn't drink it. Only after college did I start to voluntarily ween myself from the poo poo but it was a long process in my 20s and 30s going from sugared, artificial sweetener, seltzer to get to water.

Even once I was able to get a "taste" for water, it took a few years to "drink" enough. It's only been in the past year that I've actually been drinking an ounce or two from the bathroom faucet when I wake up in the middle of the night to pee.

How I managed to get to 47 without diabetes or major kidney damage, I don't know.

I'm not terribly emotional about a lot in this lovely world, but seeing parents who transition their kids off breast milk/formula to soda is heartbreaking to me.

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

EorayMel posted:

I'm now suddenly much more thankful that my overall soda consumption was at best a fraction of what yours was and that I almost exclusive drink water nowadays unless I'm having a specific meal or its a holiday or something.
Yeah, I've gone from "it's not sweet, I'm not going to drink" to drinking water, black coffee, and beer on the weekends (I only got into beer in the past 7 years).

What sucks is that the cravings for junk still pop up. Every few months, I'll go on a "I'm going to have a Coke Zero, bag of chips, and a candy bar" lunch and within an hour I regret it. The combo gives me a wicked headache that lasts for hours. On one hand, you'd think I'd change that rare habit up. On the other, I come out of thinking, "Yeah, i need it like this that to remind me..."

To keep on topic, I'm pretty much ok with any food these days (I eat mostly plant-based), but the one hump I've not been able to get over are cold pasta salads. If there really is nothing else, I can choke it down, but it's near the bottom of my preference list along with egg-salad.

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

naem posted:

All four of the sons have weird food issues, one eats entire sheet cakes regularly
Your brother-in-law is Tom Cotton?

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

Last year I started making vegan muffins using ripe bananas instead of eggs. I thought they tasted good and so did my wife. Until about a month later of making them on the weekends, I noted the substitution.

She felt betrayed: "I don't like bananas!"

Nothing I could say, including the most damnimg evidence that she had eaten and enjoyed them for a month would convince her otherwise.

To this day she won't eat muffins I bake, even when I make them with eggs.

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

fauna posted:

same, and the worst thing is, i can't quit them i'm like that one lactose intolerant goon who was also a cheese addict and slowly poisoning all his coworkers with fart fumes
You're in a safe space, here.

Never apologize for farting, no matter what the circumstance.

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

big dyke energy posted:

that said my brother eats only chicken nuggets and broccoli, what the gently caress
I'll actually give him credit for the broccoli.

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

Son of Rodney posted:

creamed corn has always sounded fake to me as a non US person. Like something from the simpsons like creamed eels
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NaTMYbE1HGs

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

gizmojumpjet posted:

Yeah I'm out of line, cruciferous vegetables really are best when they're boiled for two hours and then forced down the gullet of a literal child on pain of thrashing with a leather strap.
It's a fine excuse for not eating that food prepared in that way.

What's your excuse for not eating it prepared in alternative, non awful ways now?

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Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.

Yam Slacker

Woden posted:

An old room mate of mine drank so much water he couldn't go on a road trip longer than an hour without needing a piss break. I get that a lot of people aren't hydrating enough, but some people take it to the extreme.
Same. I've had some people tell me they don't think I'm drinking enough but a common scenario to this day is making myself a 16oz fruit and veggie smoothie (just fruit, vegetables, water, no extra sugar) and quaff it down in 5-10 minutes.

An hour later I'll drink a 20oz coffee about as quickly and for the next couple of hours, I'm "omg, gotta go!" pissing every 20 minutes.

If I space out the delay time from an hour to even 90 minutes, its not a problem

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