The BSS Movie Thread: Rob liefelf

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > The BSS Movie Thread: Rob liefelf

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

howe_sam posted:

This is basically Warner having zero confidence in the US movie market rebounding next year and relying on foreign markets/HBO Max subs to keep them afloat?

It's that but it's also way worse, it's WB not only having zero confidence in domestic theaters, it's having zero fear of them -- because the threat was always "you go day-and-date on home release and we won't show your loving movies at all, ever again". This is WB saying "we truly, honestly, don't care if you show our movies or not any more, because we're not making any money from you guys anyway right now and movie theaters aren't how we plan to make money in the future".

It's an absolute bombshell move and it no-hyperbole may kill off movie theaters.

# ¿ Dec 3, 2020 19:51

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 17:59

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

howe_sam posted:

See, I tend to doubt that, because i just don't see how you replicate the box office gross of a Wonder Woman with HBOMax subs.

I mean, you don't, but it's important to remember that for every Avengers: Endgame, there's five John Carters. The blockbusters have to subsidize every movie that flops, underperforms, or was just never going to pull in more than $50-$60 million even in the best case scenario. The studios are okay with trading that sort of boom-or-bust jagged revenue for the Netflix model of guaranteed income and using releases just to draw new subscribers and keep the ones you've got from unsubscribing.

Every studio's got access to the same data on viewer trends, and they've each made projections, and they've all been looking ahead to an all-streaming future for a while now -- that's why they all launched streaming services, that's why Fox put itself up for sale and was the subject of such an intense bidding war (Fox couldn't make the math work on a streaming service of their own but knew their IP and back catalog would be a huge boost to someone else). They just thought they had 5-10 years to make the transition.

# ¿ Dec 3, 2020 20:11

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

site posted:

Idg why choosing to hedge getting some money through streaming vs no one seeing it in theaters is a surprising move.

Because literally every studio's wanted to do this for years now but held off because they feared movie theater reprisal -- do you remember the shitfit that the chains threw when Universal put the new Trolls up day-and-date on PPV and how they had to eventually make nice? -- and now a studio's gone ahead and ripped the bandaid off and dared the theaters to do something about it, because they know and we know that nobody's going right now and the theaters have zero leverage. And not just any studio, but one of the biggest. And this might open the floodgates to everyone else pulling it too (Disney's got an investor call literally next week and they're certainly feeling the dual pressures of no theater revenue and also being in a uniquely bad position with the MCU because it's linear storytelling and delaying any one of them moves the entire slate back). And it also guarantees that the theaters will have a 2021 that, even if it's not as bad as 2020 was, will still be really loving bad and they're already in dire financial straits right now and were begging for bailout money even before this news hit.

# ¿ Dec 3, 2020 20:23

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Happy Noodle Boy posted:

https://twitter.com/getfandom/status/1336382080305881088?s=21

FOLKS

I saw a purported "Home Worlds" leaked poster that I assumed was clickbait bullshit, but it's starting to look a lot more plausible.

# ¿ Dec 8, 2020 21:36

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Disney and Sony solving the Spider-Man rights fuckery by going "you know what, gently caress it, full canonical multiverse, everyone do whatever" is... just the best possible outcome.

# ¿ Dec 8, 2020 22:36

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

site posted:

Okay if that's true guess I was wrong but lol anyways

Who's gonna play Miles

If we're very, very lucky, the voice of Shameik Moore?

# ¿ Dec 8, 2020 23:32

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Blockhouse posted:

is that Loki as DB Cooper??

Incredible.

That is indeed Loki as DB Motherfucking Cooper, yes.

# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 03:48

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

JordanKai posted:

It's also a lot easier to explain why there haven't been F4 characters until now than it is to explain where the X-Men have been. They might need to brainstorm on that for a little bit.

I saw some rando on quora point out today that the Infinity Stones canonically release a great deal of gamma radiation, and there were just three Gauntlet snaps set off on Earth in short succession of each other. I'd be satisfied with that for an explanation.

# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 03:59

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

It took a second viewing of the Loki trailer to notice that the TVA lady meets Loki at a desk with three giant masks behind it, and there are three statues on the outside of the building.

We have officially lived long enough to see a cinematic Living Tribunal, who says 2020 is all bad

# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 04:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

SlimGoodbody posted:

Lmao if Disney owns the rights to the xenomorphs from the Alien franchise (at this point I can't keep track of what they've gobbled up) they can even tie the Brood in with them somehow.

They do. And the Predators!

Also I love that America Chavez being confirmed is, like, the twenty-seventh most important thing they announced today. They're 100% doing Young Avengers next.

twistedmentat posted:

My pitch for F4 is Reed is just super smart scientist that has no interest in the super hero world, he'll let Stark and Pym and the rest do that kind of stuff.

I have a pitch for F4 that is a post-credits scene in an unrelated movie to tease it and a three movie synopsis, don't tempt me

# ¿ Dec 11, 2020 07:52

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Escobarbarian posted:

https://twitter.com/bertieglbrt/status/1363872778500341760?s=21

Zach Snyder is the most tiresome motherfucker alive and I dearly wish the most tiresome nerds alive hadn't gotten angry about too many genre movies being good and made him a cause celebre.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2021 20:40

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Davros1 posted:

Is the DLC stuff canon? Where does Jason, Freddy, Rambo, and Robocop fit into the overall narrative?

Only the story is canon, if versus matches were canon it'd be awfully hard to explain how come everyone comes back after being gruesomely murdered a million times.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2021 20:44

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Roth posted:

I don't think people were angry because Josstice League was good.

No, they were angry that Star Wars and Marvel movies were good and decided to back Snyder's bullshit out of pure contrarianism because the normies~~~~~~~, is what I was saying.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2021 20:47

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I really liked MK10's new generation characters, they were fun and had good chemistry and the new status quo was cool. So it was a bit of a bummer for MK11 to go "wait no, focus back on all the old dudes and also timeline reset".

They could've had Scorpion and Sub-Zero pass the mantles down to their most promising students, y'know? "Scorpion and Sub-Zero, but this time they're ninja buddies and government operatives who fight crime" writes itself!

# ¿ Feb 23, 2021 18:33

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

OnimaruXLR posted:

This is just an inherent problem with fighting games as they've evolved. You can staple new stuff on and tweak the old stuff but god forbid you change or remove too much. Or at least, that's the impression the internet mob gives you--it's hard to tell how it would actually translate to sales because mouthy fanboys are euphemistically holding dev studios hostage

Yeah, I understand that, but Mortal Kombat handles it better than most already by siloing off Story so utterly from everything else. Like, not only were there Alive Version skins of all the dead dudes in MK10, they were the default. It'd be no problem to just move on with the story and introduce new characters that way, but not actually cut the character roster because all the old guys are still there, and gently caress it, they can even have young version skins and cheeky before-match dialogue about it. You could even go another generation forward and still let people play as Liu Kang, because what, that's somehow sillier than the Joker showing up?

# ¿ Feb 23, 2021 19:49

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

MacheteZombie posted:

Starting to feel like no live action MK is gunna live up to the wild nature of these games

I've always felt that the first two, at least, should be layups. Movie 1 is the first game, movie 2 is the second and third, using the fact that MK2's plot is a lazy retread of MK1 to its advantage.

MK1 is a basic tournament movie, and as Bob Chipman loves to point out, "a bunch of martial artists all come to a tournament for differing personal goals" has been made approximately ten billion times and there's no excuse to get it wrong. You have Raiden explain the stakes, which are really basic (tournament every 100 years vs. bad dimension, 10 losses in a row means winning side gets to destroy the losing side, Earthrealm has lost the previous 9 so oh poo poo), Liu Kang wins, easy peasy.

MK2 should open a year later with the next tournament getting called, which breaks the rules as presented in the first movie in a way that makes it natural for the characters to demand an explanation from Raiden, who can then deliver the slightly more complicated exposition for this one: technically tournaments get called at the discretion of the losing realm at any time up to 100 years after the previous, and Earthrealm's been stalling so they waited the maximum amount of time for each one, plus nobody's ever called one this quickly because it makes no goddamn sense: all your best guys are loving dead and the dude who won is still in his prime, it's a guranteed loss. Oh and by the way, losing side hosts, so it's off to Outworld this time. Except halfway through the movie when the good guys breeze through the tournament for a much too easy win, they learn they got played: Shao Kahn didn't give a poo poo about taking a loss, he just wanted all of Earthrealm's defenders distracted while Shang Tsung did the rituals to resurrect Sindel on Earth, and now he can invade under the pretext of getting back his bride, so ha ha, gently caress you. Big Act Three invasion fight and the good guys win, except Earth's been somewhat devastated and now the way is permanently open between the two realms, so now you can do the really crazy poo poo with future movies.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2021 20:42

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

John Wick of Dogs posted:

I DEMAND THEY RELEASE THE STRYKER CUT

Aaaaaand scene.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2021 23:25

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

McCloud posted:

https://twitter.com/ray8fisher/status/1364643265421664263?s=20

Why were Cyborg�s genitals a topic of discussion at all though

# ¿ Feb 24, 2021 19:45

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

OnimaruXLR posted:

https://twitter.com/ComicBook/status/1364662662727098369

But now how will we know who's trying to ice-skate uphill

# ¿ Feb 24, 2021 23:57

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

site posted:

i mean, i guess if i was cage and read the script and saw i got killed in the first 10 minutes i would dip out too that was stupid as hell. who in their right mind sees him being charismatic as gently caress and decides, hey let's kill that guy off

I think there was a rights issue with Johnny Cage at the time, something about the original mocap guy suing them or something? I know the games killed him off too around then and it wasn't a coincidence.

Lurdiak posted:

It's not the swearing I'm worried about, it's the blood.

I'm honestly not. We're conditioned to expect vampires to explode bloodlessly into dust and disappear; hell, that was what happened in the original Blade movies too. So long there aren't any terribly gory kills -- and this is a Marvel superhero movie, why would there be -- it'll be fine.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2021 17:16

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Neither Coates nor Abrams are names I'd have expected to see attached to Superman and I can't imagine what that combined angle on him is gonna look like. It'll be neat to find out.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2021 18:24

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

site posted:

After the sequel trilogy I can't imagine letting jj near anything but as long as he's only producing and not actually directing it might have a shot of not being garbage. TNC tho, I like his cap so hopefully the script will be good

I have a hard time blaming anyone for Rise of Skywalker. Trevorrow showing his whole rear end on Fallen Kingdom and Book of Henry screwed up the timetable and Leia was supposed to have a much bigger story focus except Carrie Fisher loving died. Of course the whole thing was a mess, I feel like you've got to grade it on a curve. Apart from actually sitting down before they began the trilogy and plotting out the broad strokes rather than Exquisite Corpsing it up and playing a giant billion dollar game of "here's some clues lol idk you figure it out" -- which they absolutely should have done, don't get me wrong -- I don't know what else they could've done to salvage it.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2021 22:29

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

site posted:

well not throwing out everything from tlj and bringing in clone palpatine and making rey his granddaughter probably would've been a good start

I feel like the latter half of that is a symptom, not the disease, though. "Hey JJ y'know that Star Wars movie you weren't going to make?" "Yeah what about it" "You're making it now and you have no prep time, start shooting." "Wait gently caress what, what's even the plot?" "We dunno, the other guy was gonna make it up but he has dumb ideas, figure it out as you shoot, clock's ticking go go go" "Oh poo poo okay um gently caress Palpatine, let's go with Palpatine aaaaaaaaaaaah"

But yes they should have told the angry internet Nazis to get hosed, I'd forgotten they did that but it's definitely a bad thing they did that could've also been prevented.

CapnAndy fucked around with this message at 23:38 on Feb 26, 2021

# ¿ Feb 26, 2021 23:36

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

WW84 was such a complete, incomprehensible mess that I imagine the story of its production is probably very interesting.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2021 18:03

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

John Wick of Dogs posted:

WW84 had some story problems and definitely some political problems but I thought it was easy to follow and usually pretty entertaining so I was surprised people hate it so much or thought it was convoluted or incomprehensible. It had some sketchy stuff in it but was mostly a by the book "be careful what you wish for" story.

Oh, no, I didn't mean the movie itself. I meant that pretty much every decision they made, starting right from "let's make 'magic wishing rock with no rules' the plot" on down, was incomprehensible.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2021 18:22

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I'll actually stick up for Iron Man 2, apart from the atrocious sound design where two combat mechs laying into each other sounds like some pots and pans rattling around, I think it holds up and a lot of the stick it got at the time was from an audience that wasn't used to characters crossing over into other franchises. Like, yeah, IM2 spends a lot of time with Nick Fury and setting up Black Widow so it's not wholly an Iron Man movie, sure. But these days, people complain when characters from other movies don't show up.

Dark World, on the other hand, is such a pile of nothing. I only know that the baddie was Malekith because Malekith is cool and worth remembering in the comics. I remember the Convergence because it was visually striking, but do I remember what the Dark Elves' evil plot was without looking it up? No. (They wanted to use the Reality Stone at the point of the Convergence to be able to affect all Nine Realms at once, but even after looking it up, I still couldn't tell you if they wanted to rewrite reality or destroy everything or what the gently caress their ultimate aim was.)

# ¿ Mar 2, 2021 21:58

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Big Mean Jerk posted:

Iron Man 2 isn�t great, but it�s still entertaining as hell for the entire runtime because of that cast. It�s all flash and no substance but the flash is really cool and pretty.

See, I disagree with that. "Tony is staring death in the face and not dealing with it well" and "Tony has real issues with everything his father left him" are both themes that start up in IM2 and are going to get developed further in all his appearances until they both reach their final resolutions in Endgame.

Also, the retcon that the kid at the Stark Expo was Peter Parker is cool.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2021 22:19

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

theironjef posted:

Cool, watch Jack and Jill, the movie containing multiple full length Dunkin Donuts commercials, and enjoy knowing that it has a soul in a way that Dark World does not.

*Honestly I agree that Dark World ain't great, I just can't follow you to Adam Sandler output. It's not like there's a lot of speculation to make. He realized he can get funding for his movies, cut every possible corner, and also fill them so full of product placement that they're profitable regardless of box office, thus ensuring a big empty payoff every time.

Like 90% of the time, the answer is that he wants to go on vacation with his friends and has figured out a way to get studios to pay him to do it. There's a reason why the laziest of his movies take place in the nicest settings.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2021 23:13

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Lurdiak posted:

I respectfully disagree that anyone in modern Street Fighter rules.

How are you besmirch the master of Saikyo-ryu fighting style :mad:

# ¿ Mar 3, 2021 23:22

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

A talking coyote posted:

How DO you put the soul stone back? Just drop it off that cliff? Punt it into the sky?

He's supposed to return them as soon as possible, so presumably you just hand it back to the Red Skull the second Hawkeye disappears.

# ¿ Mar 4, 2021 21:06

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I liked the "Welcome, Steven, son of... a bitch, how are you still alive" meme personally.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2021 00:28

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Jane Thor in the comics was unbelievably jacked and I really did not expect it from the movies because, y'know, Natalie Portman is loving tiny. But here we are.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2021 03:44

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Old Kentucky Shark posted:

Now all we need is Cat-Thor, the Odinson who is a cat, and his tiny hammer Mewnir, and this will literally be the best movie ever made.

Loki shows up, refuses to explain why he's alive because "spoilers" even if the show has aired, spends the entire movie shapeshifted as Cat-Thor, and refuses to explain that too.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2021 04:19

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

X-O posted:

It's not terrible but it makes the same fatal mistake every cartoon/live action mash up does. Assuming we give a poo poo about the live action characters.

loving Godzilla Disease, it's why I'm still only mildly hyped for Godzilla vs. Kong. King of the Monsters was awesome when it was about Godzilla and Ghidorah having giant loving monster fights, but every five minutes of that they felt the need to cut away to some dumbshit humans doing stupid human poo poo for twenty minutes.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2021 19:41

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Arist posted:

What

I mean, the second part of that is dumb poo poo Snyder actually wanted to do? I understood that bit.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2021 00:04

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Vince MechMahon posted:

You're the right winger here, supporting Biden.

Folks, what a sentence we have here, and a rare treat too to see C-SPAM outside of its natural habitat.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2021 08:00

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

TwoPair posted:

If I had to bet I'd say there's two reasons. One is sheerly for the optics of having people come out in droves to theaters because it looks good in commercials and probably investor meetings. The other reason is that they've probably got some kind of merchandising deal with the theater chains that they've got to honor so they can sell their commemorative Black Widow cups or whatever.

But on the other hand, and at this point it's bizarre they don't see it, they're running the risk of becoming Tenet 2: Underwhelming Opening Weekend Boogaloo. May 7th is too early to do pre-pandemic numbers and if they hype themselves up as being the big EVERYTHING'S NORMAL COME OUT TO THE MOVIES EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE DEATHTRAPS thing and then don't do a $100 million opening weekend, what then?

Desperado Bones posted:

I would gladly pay for premium access if it was cheaper. The loving prices D+ has in my country are nuts.

Is your country America, because $30 per movie is goddamn absurd.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2021 16:08

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I saw Tenet and Freaky mid-pandemic but both times I found completely empty showings where I was the only person in there, so that was okay.

I'm glad I saw Tenet that way because it's a giant mess of a movie but it sure is a loving spectacle about it. It's like Avatar, anything short of 20 foot tall Dolby screens robs it of its one redeeming value.

# ¿ Mar 13, 2021 01:02

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

SlimGoodbody posted:

We were sober as popes by the time we left, but still did not fully understand the movie.

Hey I was sober for the whole thing, let me clear some poo poo up for you:

the movie doesn't goddamn make sense.

I'm sure there's a flowchart somewhere on Nolan's computer in both chronological and percieved order, it's too swaggeringly smug about how "well actually upon four viewings and a youtube tutorial there are no plot holes" for it not to be worked out, but then he decided to just leave out a bunch of really crucial poo poo (Neil has multiple loops still to do when the movie ends, even though we've seen him doing that poo poo from the perspective of the other characters, meaning there's multiple Neils in any given scene appearing and disappearing for no apparent reason), and also leave the main villains completely off-screen and with incomprehensible motives (they want to make a time paradox even though paradoxes are impossible and doing so would destroy them too, because they're in the future of the timeline they're trying to wreck, because ________?????).

# ¿ Mar 13, 2021 05:59

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 17:59

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

AV Club review is up and they panned the poo poo out of it, but my favorite detail is that all the scenes with Superman smiling have been cut out of the movie, which is just so perfectly :discourse:

# ¿ Mar 15, 2021 17:40

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > The BSS Movie Thread: Rob liefelf

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