The Orb Shoppe

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Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Hello Yobbers, it's time for you guys to collect orb. Our friend Orbicular Oswald here is "selling" orbs. He's not asking for money though.

Ask Oswald for an orb and you'll get one. Each orb is potentially unique. YOU CAN TRADE ORBS WITH OTHER POSTERS. YES YOU CAN LEGALLY DO THIS. YOU MAY HAVE MORE THAN ONE ORB SO FEEL FREE TO KEEP GETTING ORBS

# ? Aug 30, 2020 21:10

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# ? Apr 16, 2024 17:32

nut

Hi Oswald sorry about what my mom said about you, can i have an orb please?

# ? Aug 30, 2020 21:11

redm

hello yes one orb please

_{sig by Manifisto}

# ? Aug 30, 2020 21:18

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

nut posted:

Hi Oswald sorry about what my mom said about you, can i have an orb please?

Nut received The Orb of Fluting Music

This orb can generate an all-flute cover of any song of your choice and gives you the lungs of a flautist.

# ? Aug 30, 2020 21:33

nut

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Nut received The Orb of Fluting Music

This orb can generate an all-flute cover of any song of your choice and gives you the lungs of a flautist.

I love my orb thank u pm and Oswald :sun:

# ? Aug 30, 2020 21:52

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Dear Oswald,

If it's not too much trouble, may I please have a ~~bong~~ orb so I can show all my friends and be the talk of the town?

Sincerely,

the guy you chase out of your store with curses and thrown shoes every now and then

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? Aug 30, 2020 22:02

Prof. Crocodile

may i have an orb please, oswald?

i feel like i've always had an orb, spiritually, and i would like to see what physical orb i get and if it corresponds to what i imagine my spiritual orb to be.

# ? Aug 30, 2020 22:06

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

redm posted:

hello yes one orb please

redm received the mighty Orb of the Heat-Seeking Fist

This orb grants the owner the ability to locate the nearest heat source when their hands are balled into a fist. Owner can also launch fists like heat-seeking missiles. Hands take 3 months to regenerate completely, yes you will have baby hands that grow into adult hands, yes it'll be weird, no you may not have a sip of my diet root beer.

# ? Aug 30, 2020 22:11

more falafel please: forums poster

hmm

ill have uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

orb

thanks Saoshyant and nesamdoom for the sigs!

# ? Aug 30, 2020 22:22

Chewbecca: Just chillin' : )

Oswald, may I trouble you for 1 (one) orb, please :shobon:

_{Thanks to Heather Papps for sweet sig, click for more hot lady action}

_{sigs by luvcow and Khanstant.

Click on Spoonville for a neat surprise}

_{(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ #YesNutNovember - add this to your sig if you love and support BYOB's own nut}

# ? Aug 30, 2020 22:32

Macnult

hey oswald, i heard you�re the go-to orb guy. may i please have an orb?

# ? Aug 30, 2020 22:54

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

Dear Oswald,

If it's not too much trouble, may I please have a ~~bong~~ orb so I can show all my friends and be the talk of the town?

Sincerely,

the guy you chase out of your store with curses and thrown shoes every now and then

Pot Smoke Phoenix received the Orb of the Ambitious Splinter!

This orb allows its owner to bless a splinter that once lodged in a victim will cause them to attempt various DIY projects despite their level of skill.

# ? Aug 30, 2020 23:04

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

My quest for a Round Tuit is over!

Thank you!

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? Aug 30, 2020 23:31

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Prof. Crocodile posted:

may i have an orb please, oswald?

i feel like i've always had an orb, spiritually, and i would like to see what physical orb i get and if it corresponds to what i imagine my spiritual orb to be.

i think i'm going to switch to pencil drawings because im lazy

Prof. Crocodile receives The Orb of Comical Beans

Causes the users flatus to always induce riotous laughter in others if the user has eaten leguminous fruit within 6 hours prior to beefing. Unfortunately no one will ever laugh at anything the owner of the orb says or does; only at their farts.

# ? Aug 31, 2020 00:00

Prof. Crocodile

Plant MONSTER. posted:

i think i'm going to switch to pencil drawings because im lazy

Prof. Crocodile receives The Orb of Comical Beans

Causes the users flatus to always induce riotous laughter in others if the user has eaten leguminous fruit within 6 hours prior to beefing. Unfortunately no one will ever laugh at anything the owner of the orb says or does; only at their farts.

i mean yeah, this is pretty much the orb for me. thanks!

# ? Aug 31, 2020 00:03

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

orb

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Aug 31, 2020 05:35

Stoner Sloth

dear oswald,

please help cure me of my accursed state of orblessness

regards,

sloth

sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut, Heather Papps,Prof Crocodile, knuthgrush, Ohtori Akio, Teapot, Saosyhant, Dumb Sex Parrot, w4ddl3d33, and nesamdoom!! - ty friends!

# ? Aug 31, 2020 05:46

alnilam

desire of ORB thank

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Aug 31, 2020 05:47

redm

Plant MONSTER. posted:

redm received the mighty Orb of the Heat-Seeking Fist

This orb grants the owner the ability to locate the nearest heat source when their hands are balled into a fist. Owner can also launch fists like heat-seeking missiles. Hands take 3 months to regenerate completely, yes you will have baby hands that grow into adult hands, yes it'll be weird, no you may not have a sip of my diet root beer.

Thank you, I shall cherish it forever.

_{sig by Manifisto}

# ? Aug 31, 2020 05:54

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Chewbecca posted:

Oswald, may I trouble you for 1 (one) orb, please

Chewbecca gets the Orb of Bees! A Hallowed orb!

Allows the owner of the orb to communicate with bees and allow for peaceful trade negotiations between the human and the apis species. The owner of the orb can now only subsist off honey, however.
to those wondering, I generated a loooooot of zany orbs using AI and I saved them to a list, I sort of pick one at random but if one catches my eye that fits, I pick it lol

# ? Aug 31, 2020 17:57

Chewbecca: Just chillin' : )

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Chewbecca gets the Orb of Bees! A Hallowed orb!

Allows the owner of the orb to communicate with bees and allow for peaceful trade negotiations between the human and the apis species. The owner of the orb can now only subsist off honey, however.

This orb is precious to me, and I'll treasure it always :nice:

# ? Aug 31, 2020 23:01

define_byte

dear oswald first time buyer long time lurker, may i have an orb pls

# ? Aug 31, 2020 23:19

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Macnult posted:

hey oswald, i heard you�re the go-to orb guy. may i please have an orb?

Macnult receives the Orb of the Three Evil Cathedrals

You are now the demon pope in charge of three wicked satanic denominations. You can summon demon papal regalia after uttering an evil incantation. There are no downsides to this orb.

owlhawk911 posted:

orb

Owlhawk911 receives the Orb of Mystical Repose

If the owner of this orb embarks and completes a magical journey, he or she will be rewarded with the power to fall asleep whenever they want and will always wake up super refreshed. What encompasses a magical journey is up for debate and until the journey is complete, your sleep will be kind of lovely.

# ? Sep 1, 2020 00:08

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Owlhawk911 receives the Orb of Mystical Repose

If the owner of this orb embarks and completes a magical journey, he or she will be rewarded with the power to fall asleep whenever they want and will always wake up super refreshed. What encompasses a magical journey is up for debate and until the journey is complete, your sleep will be kind of lovely.

ty i love it

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Sep 1, 2020 01:04

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

Oswald!

me buddy!

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Sep 1, 2020 02:59

Macnult

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Macnult receives the Orb of the Three Evil Cathedrals

You are now the demon pope in charge of three wicked satanic denominations. You can summon demon papal regalia after uttering an evil incantation. There are no downsides to this orb.

siiick

thanks oswald

# ? Sep 1, 2020 23:51

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

what I should've done was just made some example orbs in the OP and only draw SOME of the orbs oh well. ORBS ARE NOW TEXT ONLY AND FANS CAN DRAW THE ORBS OR ILL DRAW SOME SOMETIMES.

but also like ask for more orbs now because i can just like poo poo this stuff out basically

oops i broke character i mean Oswald: "Oh children of the orbs I bequeath unto thee"

Stoner Sloth posted:

dear oswald,

please help cure me of my accursed state of orblessness

regards,

sloth

Stoner Sloth, with open heart and palms, receives the Orb of the Dried-up Herring. This curious orb allows its owner to dessicate any member of the genus Clupea, allowing for safe and indefinite storage of a valuable food source. The owner can also reanimate any dessicated herring and command it if in possession of the Herringbone Staff of the Occult.

alnilam posted:

desire of ORB thank

Oswald has a special orb for ye, the Orb of the Enlightening Virtue of the Drunken Pirate. This orb causes one to develop a penchant for sailing the seas and a lust for rum. Being drunk on rum while at seas causes the owner of the orb to speak life changing truths that allow all those who hear to finally break free the cycle of reincarnation. A hallowed orb.

Evil Bob posted:

Oswald, will you please provide me with an Orb? My only request is that it must contain both untold horrors and unlimited beauty. So whichever one you got please. thanks

You'll be happy to hear that there is indeed an orb that fills your requirements. The Orb of The Unicorn Horrors is the orb for thee. The owner of the orb will be accompanied by an eldritch unicorn that reeks of tar and bile and shits more than a normal horse does. The owner's commands to the beast are absolute and the two share a telepathic bond. Note that everyone else will perceive the unicorn as a fake horse head on a stick with a party hat on.

define_byte posted:

dear oswald first time buyer long time lurker, may i have an orb pls

The Orb of Wasabi Mouth has been chosen for ye. You will forever give spicy kisses that clear the sinuses of the kissee. Everything eaten will have a distinct horseradish flavor to it. Experienced wielders of this orb can eventually summon globs of wasabi in their mouths which can be used for various purposes (condiment mostly but also spit in peoples eyes)

# ? Sep 2, 2020 18:38

Khanstant

*browsing the shop but dont decide to get nothing but leave a penny in the leave-a-penny dish*

# ? Sep 2, 2020 18:45

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Orders
Regarding
Bodyguard

Operation
Rusty's
Blanket

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Sep 2, 2020 18:47

alnilam

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Oswald has a special orb for ye, the Orb of the Enlightening Virtue of the Drunken Pirate. This orb causes one to develop a penchant for sailing the seas and a lust for rum. Being drunk on rum while at seas causes the owner of the orb to speak life changing truths that allow all those who hear to finally break free the cycle of reincarnation. A hallowed orb.

Arr, thank ye Oswald, thank ye

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Sep 2, 2020 19:11

Evil Bob: 've lived a thousand times. I found out what it means to be GBS.

Plant MONSTER. posted:

You'll be happy to hear that there is indeed an orb that fills your requirements. The Orb of The Unicorn Horrors is the orb for thee. The owner of the orb will be accompanied by an eldritch unicorn that reeks of tar and bile and shits more than a normal horse does. The owner's commands to the beast are absolute and the two share a telepathic bond. Note that everyone else will perceive the unicorn as a fake horse head on a stick with a party hat on.

The feeble people's perception of my unicorn is very on brand. This is the perfect orb for my needs. Thank you Oswald.

Attn: Everyone - This orb is NOT for trade!

# ? Sep 2, 2020 19:24

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Please, sir, may I have an orb?

# ? Sep 2, 2020 23:25

Manifisto

these are amazing and as my first official act as IK I have stickied the thread!

also may I have an orb please?

e: maybe I will blender up whatever you suggest, since you're done drawing them

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Sep 2, 2020 23:58

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

Please orb me.

# ? Sep 3, 2020 00:00

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Khanstant posted:

*browsing the shop but dont decide to get nothing but leave a penny in the leave-a-penny dish*

Oswald halts Khanstant before he can leave. "It's on the house. I insist." Oswald says. Khanstant now owns the Orb of the Abyss of the of the Goddess. This relic opens up a secret chasm in marianas trench where the Goddess lives. She will only speak to the wielder of the orb. She knows very juicy gossip about all the creatures of the deep and will gladly share it with those who visit her. Owner does not feel the crushing pressure of the abyssal sea and can breathe freely underwater. You are now gelatinous.

# ? Sep 3, 2020 01:14

Slumpy

i want the complex orb

slumpy

# ? Sep 3, 2020 15:50

DOPE FIEND KILLA G

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsTFkdpeXGY
this scene but orbs not candy

# ? Sep 3, 2020 19:18

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# ? Apr 16, 2024 17:32

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

pixaal posted:

Orders
Regarding
Bodyguard

Operation
Rusty's
Blanket

I'm... that's... Orb doesn't stand for that. Orb doesn't stand for anything. Orbs just are and because they are, things can be.

Oh look! Speaking of orbs, here's the Orb of Somnolence and Euphoria. With this orb you have direct control over your internal cannabinoid systems! You can now spend your days in a blissful stupor with your eyes half-lidded.

# ? Sep 3, 2020 19:53

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