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projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


Sorry for the slightly late and slightly short update tonight, but it's Day 5! It's gonna get experimental.


The CW sends Veronica Mars a water tank. How nice of them. It also contains all sorts of surveillance equipment and dossiers on all the entrants. How actually useful of them. Tito runs from the poison grenade, but cannot run from the darkness that poisons his heart. There's no antidote for that poison. Elsewhere, the Inflatable One has recruited almost everyone left into his own glorious army. Against him, who can stand? Without him, who could survive? Not Davey rear end in a top hat, who suffers an ice fishing accident.


Veronica Mars is beginning to lose it. She's been out here for days, she hasn't really slept, nobody has made a pithy quip in almost a week, and she's beginning to think there's no mystery to solve. That she's been simply brought here by incomprehensible forces, just to die. Speaking of die, Tito finally pulls it off! He feels his sins slip away as he plummets. He lands, and is at peace. So, it turns out, Sami Zayn is a smart, perceptive, and nerdily handsome guy. He wasn't just drawing maps, he was drawing circles. He wasn't just skanking about, he was skanking about to stamp symbols into the earth. This comes to fruition now, as Mecha Mummy empowers his magical ward with a Mecha Beam. It lights up, and Inflatable Punk feels something other than hunger for the first time. Fear. All the spirits of all the warriors buried in this arena are brought back by Sami and Mecha Mummy, and they prepare for the final confrontation. Inflatable Punk tries to run away, but the spectral weights of Big Show, Big Daddies I and V, and the other massive souls hold him in place. Roll tosses Mega Man a special Ghost Buster as he, Robocop, and others fire blast after blast into the puppet's will. Champion Pig is back, and still has a sword! Great job, Champion Pig. The three rear end in a top hat Brothers attempt to sell Ghost Merch. Finally, Jeanne d'Arc's holy blade severs the being from the balloon. The latex crumples to the ground as the malevolence inside leaves this plane. The spirits of the fallen return to their rest, their duty completed. SamI Zayn and Mecha Mummy high five. Meanwhile, the Wu-Tangs and Old Man Jenkins were reminiscing about their New York childhoods and missed the whole thing.


I hope the remaining entrants constitute your Fave Five like Booker T's has his boy D Bry on it.

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Seth Rollins
Oct 24, 2001

i'll always take care of you


Muldoon

my heart is broken

KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008



old man gonna win with out doing a high spot (killing some one)

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008



massive boring chants

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

Excuse me, I'd like to
speak to the moderator




Let's go Mars I guess

JOHN CENA
Oct 20, 2006


projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


I'm sorry everyone.

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008



j/k on all of my hatred. loving the write-ups on everything, especially the ones you mentioned liking to do previously

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008



wrong thread. it's very late at night.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

Excuse me, I'd like to
speak to the moderator




projecthalaxy posted:

I'm sorry everyone.

It's not your fault the RNG broke bad. Sorry for being a dick about it This update was very good!

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


This is the equivalent of wiping out the big bad built up all season 3 episodes before the end of the season, it's the kind of thing you see on late 90s early 2000s CW shows, not unlike.... Veronica Mars....

JOHN CENA
Oct 20, 2006


the cw didn't exist until the late 00s i feel like im in a portal here

projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


JOHN CENA posted:

the cw didn't exist until the late 00s i feel like im in a portal here

It was formed in September 2006 by the merger of the WB Network and UPN (which delivered it both Veronica Mars and SmackDown, relevant to our discussion).

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


JOHN CENA posted:

the cw didn't exist until the late 00s i feel like im in a portal here

CW was UPN's successor and Veronica Mars ended its run on there.

Pinche Rudo
Feb 8, 2005



Mecha mummy popped inflatable CM punk


https://thumbs.gfycat.com/Prestigio...keet-mobile.mp4

CHaKKaWaKka
Aug 6, 2001

I've chosen my next victim. Cry tears of joy it's not you!

At this point I think only the Wu-Tang Clan can save us from the Mecha Mummy.

Golden Bee
Dec 24, 2009

I came here to chew bubblegum and quote 'They Live', and I'm... at an impasse.


Could be a very good week for Johnny blood.

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

Cabana's legal advice?
I'm bourgeoisie.
I... hit the shitty
firemans carry knee.






CHaKKaWaKka posted:

At this point I think only the Wu-Tang Clan can save us from the Mecha Mummy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpQmFfdYFzY

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

still a threat



Davey rear end in a top hat has fallen

yea ok
Jul 27, 2006



rigged

jesus WEP
Oct 17, 2004

OM NOM NOM NOM NOM



Fun Shoe

Seth Rollins posted:

my heart is broken

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012

this glorious monument



You know I've been wondering; did Mecha Mummy exist only to feud with Suzuki?

forkboy84
Jun 13, 2012

I thought the redtext someone dumped on you was in bad taste and a bit much so here's a corgi instead.

ChrisBTY posted:

You know I've been wondering; did Mecha Mummy exist only to feud with Suzuki?

Mecha Mummy exists because DDT. It was a 7 times DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Championship. Even turned up for a match in All Japan against Robo Hayashi & Robo Michinoku.

Mecha Mummy & Kikutaro even tagged on a Minoru Suzuki Produce show against a team featuring Jushin Thunder Liger!

frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

Almanya ÷nde!
Bir başka hedef!
Sonsuz şef L÷w išin zafer!




Getting Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny vibes from the demise of Inflatable Punk.

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projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


Bit of a production note. I'm switching to a new site for Season 3, which should probably start this weekend as we only have a few updates left on season 2. The new site only allows for 12 teams, but we can make those teams either 2, 3, or 4 players, allowing for up to 48 entrants.

Also, and this is important, it allows me to view and edit the database of events. No more falling out of trees! We can add our own events to it as well. I have a few ideas, but I figure maybe you also want to contribute.

If you'd like to submit a custom event you think would be cool or funny or something, the format is

(Player1) works (Player2) into a shoot.
This can involve up to 4 players.
Then I'll need to know if your event happens in the day, night, or both. There's a separate list of events for the Bloodbath at the beginning if youd like to submit for that.
If you want your event to result in a kill, tell me it's a lethal event, and the last player listed will be the one that dies in the event.
You can either post them here, PM me, or just tell me to go to he*k and stop outsourcing my job.

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