- Escape From Noise
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We've all been there. You're making your toast, it pops out hot, fresh, and ready to eat. Almost. All you need is some butter. You reach for it but...IT'S NOT THERE! You search around frantically for a few seconds but to no avail! You have to think fast or your toast will become cold and inedible! Don't Panic! Here are some quick alternatives to butter:
-Olive oil. Dump a little on your toast and enjoy! Mamma mia! Just like in the old country! I'm pretty sure this is how Mario eats!
-The Power Of Imagination!TM The butter is there! I can taste it! Insist that this is true, out loud, between every bite. Ignore the haters! You got this!
-Butt, it's most of the word already! Just place some but on top of that toasted bread and bite down on that juicy thing!
Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 19:14 on Sep 22, 2020
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Sep 17, 2020 06:19
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 25, 2024 10:40
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- City of Glompton
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smoothing a little primer on my toast, scrape some liquid highlight across it, tilting it in the light. its perfect
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Sep 17, 2020 07:31
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- nut
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smoothing a little primer on my toast, scrape some liquid highlight across it, tilting it in the light. its perfect
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Sep 17, 2020 08:50
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- Escape From Noise
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smoothing a little primer on my toast, scrape some liquid highlight across it, tilting it in the light. its perfect
#toastofinstagram
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Sep 17, 2020 08:57
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- Lil Swamp Booger Baby
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If you have a particularly greasy complexion, the sebum from your nose can often be gotten in large quantities. it's gross but, dry toast no thank
Would someone believe it was butter??
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Sep 17, 2020 09:02
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- Lock
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hardcore sound gets you hypah
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did you finish your bottle of jack last night? no? there’s your butter son
https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm
so much love to vanisher for the winter '21 sig!
huge love to Tiny Myers for the fall '21 sig!
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Sep 17, 2020 15:07
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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WD-40 ON TOAST LIKE A MAN
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Sep 17, 2020 15:15
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- Macnult
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smoothing a little primer on my toast, scrape some liquid highlight across it, tilting it in the light. its perfect
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Sep 17, 2020 16:07
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- Zurtilik
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The Biggest Brain in Guardia
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I Can't Believe It's nut Butter.
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Sep 17, 2020 17:58
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- Evil Bob
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've lived a thousand times. I found out what it means to be GBS.
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No, I absolutely refuse. I will not believe it. Be gone charlatan! I will hear no more of your Lies!!!
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Sep 17, 2020 18:22
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- nut
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filling my waterpik reservoir with melted margarine so it gets into all the cracks between the corn kernels
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Sep 17, 2020 18:23
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- Deep Glove Bruno
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yung swamp thang
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huff butter flavored essential oil vaporizer, take one bite of toast, repeat
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Sep 17, 2020 19:02
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- Lock
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hardcore sound gets you hypah
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butter? butter what? ur better off without 'er.
https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm
so much love to vanisher for the winter '21 sig!
huge love to Tiny Myers for the fall '21 sig!
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Sep 17, 2020 19:35
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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Carefully inspecting a painting of butter
Not butter?
No, I don't belive it
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Sep 17, 2020 21:35
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- Lil Swamp Booger Baby
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I can honestly believe it's not butter; let's stop fooling ourselves.
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Sep 18, 2020 00:54
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- Evil Bob
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've lived a thousand times. I found out what it means to be GBS.
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my whole life has been based on believing it’s butter. I just cannot believe it’s not butter. if it’s not butter I don’t even know who I am anymore. please, just tell me it’s butter and let’s leave it at that
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Sep 18, 2020 01:08
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- Prof. Crocodile
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wait stop. hold on. are you telling me it wasn't butter this whole time?
i've been living a lie... 
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Sep 18, 2020 02:34
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- Escape From Noise
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The world lies, but butter will never deceive you
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Sep 18, 2020 03:09
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- Prof. Crocodile
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The world lies, but butter will never deceive you
the grocer will never help you
only trust your churns
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Sep 18, 2020 03:30
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- Evil Bob
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've lived a thousand times. I found out what it means to be GBS.
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officer she told me it was butter!
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Sep 18, 2020 05:37
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- Escape From Noise
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officer she told me it was butter!
Are you butter? If you are, you have to tell me!
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Sep 18, 2020 05:43
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- Escape From Noise
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Never been butter!
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Sep 18, 2020 05:47
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- Escape From Noise
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Trapped in the uncanny butter valley. I try to climb out but the walls are too slippery.
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Sep 18, 2020 07:49
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- google THIS
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Clapping my hands furiously trying to save Peter Pan's partially hydrogenated vegetable oil blend with artificial flavor and color added
google THIS fucked around with this message at 19:45 on Sep 18, 2020
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Sep 18, 2020 19:43
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- Khanstant
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everyday i put toothpaste on my toothbrush and i just cannot believe it's not butter!
Khanstant fucked around with this message at 21:09 on Sep 18, 2020
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Sep 18, 2020 21:07
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- Khanstant
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in fact i loving dare you. come at me with anything. i can't never not believe it ain't butter-- just try me, punk
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Sep 18, 2020 21:09
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- google THIS
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Skeptic Spread
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Sep 19, 2020 01:11
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- Robot Made of Meat
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I try. Really I do.
All day, every day I try to believe it's not butter. It's gotten to a point where it doesn't even matter what "it" is. My inability to fathom that "it" is anything other than butter grows.
Oh, it started small. Margarine, Oleo, sandwich spread, axle grease. But the disability grew, increasingly, perniciously, inevitably. Soon I had no difficulty believing that any spreadable semisolid was butter. Nothing that could be slathered on with a broad, flat implement was beyond my simple faith in butteriness.
Eventually it spread (pardon my attempt at making my affliction humorous). Soon, I was unable not to believe that solids were not butter. Liquids soon followed. By the time I was utterly convinced that a plasma in a novelty ball from Spencer's Gifts could not possibly be anything other than butter, I knew I was lost. There was no turning back. No cure. No saving me from this hell I'd slipped so innocently into.
But I'm at peace now. I know the madness cannot be reversed, but that doesn't seem to matter. As I go forth inexorably into the bleak future I can perceive endlessly before me, I can at least take solace in the fact that my ability to discern mayonnaise from other salad dressing products is safely intact.
Thanks to Manifisto for the sig!
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Sep 19, 2020 03:22
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- Finger Prince
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I Can't Believe It's nut Butter.
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Sep 19, 2020 03:40
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- GODSPEED JOHN GLENN
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I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.
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I try. Really I do.
All day, every day I try to believe it's not butter. It's gotten to a point where it doesn't even matter what "it" is. My inability to fathom that "it" is anything other than butter grows.
Oh, it started small. Margarine, Oleo, sandwich spread, axle grease. But the disability grew, increasingly, perniciously, inevitably. Soon I had no difficulty believing that any spreadable semisolid was butter. Nothing that could be slathered on with a broad, flat implement was beyond my simple faith in butteriness.
Eventually it spread (pardon my attempt at making my affliction humorous). Soon, I was unable not to believe that solids were not butter. Liquids soon followed. By the time I was utterly convinced that a plasma in a novelty ball from Spencer's Gifts could not possibly be anything other than butter, I knew I was lost. There was no turning back. No cure. No saving me from this hell I'd slipped so innocently into.
But I'm at peace now. I know the madness cannot be reversed, but that doesn't seem to matter. As I go forth inexorably into the bleak future I can perceive endlessly before me, I can at least take solace in the fact that my ability to discern mayonnaise from other salad dressing products is safely intact.
Mayonnaise is egg butter
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Sep 19, 2020 03:59
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 25, 2024 10:40
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Clapping my hands furiously trying to save Peter Pan's partially hydrogenated vegetable oil blend with artificial flavor and color added
Upsettingly similar to butter.
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Sep 19, 2020 05:17
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Sep 17, 2020 06:19
Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!
