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"well, my uncles letter says my inheritance is in this garage... what could it be?" *flips light switch, revealing a jetpack* "hunh. okay, i guess?" |
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Oct 16, 2020 22:47
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"so what are you gonna do with it?! this is amazing man, a loving JETPACK" "well, hmmm. i have been meaning to wash my windows on the second floor."
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Oct 16, 2020 22:49
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hundreds of feet above LAX "oh boy, those pilots will be so startled... sure hope i don't get in trouble" ONE MONTH LATER "i'm getting the urge to slightly bewilder pilots again...."
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Oct 16, 2020 22:50
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I'm up at dawn, spending hours a day practicing my jetpack precision flying so that I'll be ready for the annual Regional Jetpack Aerobatic Display Competition in 3 months time. Really excited to be a part of it!! This is my first competition as a participant! Everyone loves the freestyle aerobatic events, but personally I can't describe the thrill of traversing a grid with millimeter accuracy. Speed is overrated tbh. |
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Oct 16, 2020 22:58
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boring man with a jetpack using it to shave a couple of minutes off his commute by flying to the next train station instead of the one closest to his house
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Oct 16, 2020 23:00
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boring man with a jetpack getting more excited about how efficiently his pressure washer cleans his driveway
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Oct 16, 2020 23:03
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Yeah in the end I decided to go with the Volvo jetpack. A little pricey, but you can't put a price on safety, right? |
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Oct 16, 2020 23:14
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"costume? oh, you mean my personal protective outfit. well, yeah it's shiny and reflective but only to avoid in air collisions"
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Oct 16, 2020 23:18
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hovering to the grocery store, three inches off the ground, at a sedate walking pace
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Oct 16, 2020 23:29
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biosterous posted:hovering to the grocery store, three inches off the ground, at a sedate walking pace an elderly woman asks for help reaching a box of tea from the top shelf. the boring man dutifully turns off his jetpack, retrieves a step ladder and carefully pulls down the box. nods, re-engages the twin-microfusion reactors and hovers on his way, satisfied by his good deed.
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Oct 16, 2020 23:34
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glossing over the cool poo poo you can do with a jet pack in order to overexplain proper care and maintenance |
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Oct 17, 2020 01:07
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whining to the bartender "...i even had to quit stopping at red lights, a crowd starts forming everytime. Folks jumping out their cars gawking, kids shouting poo poo like "do a backflip!" and i'm like... folks, you wouldn't believe how much of a gas guzzler this thing is when you try to get fancy with it."
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Oct 17, 2020 01:31
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Just lies his jetpack out on the driveway on sunny summer Sundays and washes it, spends hours polishing it, then puts it back in the garage. |
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Oct 17, 2020 01:37
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"ROBERT! dr. mcfreeze is threatening the mayor! HELP!" "i'll take care of it!" *robert carefully does a circle check of his jetpack, makes sure all the gyrowings are level, and finally carefully slips into the marvel of technology" "i'm off, to let the sheriff know!"
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Oct 17, 2020 01:39
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boring jetpack man straps on his jetpack and uses it to go up to 6kmph faster on his morning e-scooter commute.
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Oct 17, 2020 02:40
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bored jetpack man sits on his couch eyeballing his jetpack when the thought suddenly pops in his head... "what if I could switch this thing from blow to suck..." |
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Oct 17, 2020 03:02
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Heather Papps posted:"ROBERT! dr. mcfreeze is threatening the mayor! HELP!"
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Oct 17, 2020 03:09
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*jetpacks onto the roof to clean the gutters* honey I just saved us a hundred bucks with this thing
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Oct 17, 2020 03:10
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just using a couple quick boosts from the jetpack to heat his Marie Callender's meal
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Oct 17, 2020 03:13
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"check THIS out neighborhood kids" (kinda revs the rocket boosters on the jetpack, kids are amazed) "gotta wear a helmet though"
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Oct 17, 2020 03:15
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oh no my wife is giving birth! *uses jetpack to carry her to passenger seat, straps her in gently, softly kisses her forehead* *gets into drivers seat, readjusts for comfort, checks rear view mirror and side mirrors, asks wife if she thinks the temperature is okay and what her favorite station is* |
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Oct 17, 2020 03:16
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*rips bodice open* "honey, i want to you fly up in the jetpack naked and rain jizz down on me. hose me down with your rocket seed" "haha, you're such a kidder sweetheart. you know that the force of even a mild ejaculation could disrupt the pack's stabilizers and send me off-course" "yeah... i'm a real yukster *sigh*"
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Oct 17, 2020 03:31
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Jets gather oxygen from the environment while rockets carry their own oxidizers. I prefer fuel that includes ammonium dinitramide which means that I am, technically, a boring man with a rocket pack. |
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Oct 17, 2020 03:34
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The extremely boring man uses the battery from his jetpack to jumpstart his sensible honda accord
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Oct 17, 2020 03:45
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Landing at every stop sign so he can come to a full and complete stop before proceeding |
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Oct 17, 2020 06:17
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only using the jet pack to roam beyond his tinder match radius |
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Oct 17, 2020 06:50
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Just brings jetpack to the bar to use as a prop while singing "Rocket Man" at karaoke, but gets embarassed easily and takes it off halfway through. |
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Oct 17, 2020 08:44
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hangs my jetpack on the wall between my neon martini sign and framed poster of the rules of the man cave
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Oct 17, 2020 12:35
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ehh it’s cool I guess but the jets make my rear end uncomfortably warm when I use it so now I just use it to prop my bedroom door open so the cat can get in and out |
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Oct 17, 2020 16:08
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Sure, getting to skip the elevator is nice. But when I realized this puppy could put out 800,000 btu's I knew what it's real purpose in life was: a wok range. |
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Oct 17, 2020 17:26
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FutonForensic posted:*rips bodice open* "honey, i want to you fly up in the jetpack naked and rain jizz down on me. hose me down with your rocket seed" |
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Oct 17, 2020 20:27
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Tomfoolery posted:Jets gather oxygen from the environment while rockets carry their own oxidizers. I prefer fuel that includes ammonium dinitramide which means that I am, technically, a boring man with a rocket pack. If you're going to be boring you should at least be informative. A friend asks about the jetpack in the corner of the garage. "Oh yeah, it was kind of fun, but the wind really stung my eyes and goggles are right out of the question. I didn't switch to contact lenses just to cover up my beautiful blue eyes." |
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Oct 17, 2020 21:00
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rear end-penny posted:If you're going to be boring you should at least be informative. Nearly there, but he can't wear goggles over his prescription glasses. |
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Oct 17, 2020 21:08
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Boring man using his jetpack to blow snow off his driveway all winter and when you ask him how he's doing he shuts it off and says "livin the dream, livin the dream." before turning it back on and continuing to clear his driveway. |
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Oct 17, 2020 21:10
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Using a jetpack to heat your garage while you work on the car. The car?Chewbecca posted:his sensible honda accord
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Oct 17, 2020 21:19
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"So, what crazy poo poo are you going to do with it?" "Do with it? You mean use it? Do you have the slightest idea how much gas this thing eats? Nah man, I paid for my year long subscription of a 10% price reduction for bus tickets and I'm going to use that."
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Oct 17, 2020 21:30
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an extremely boring man with a jetpack, and his best friend, a very timid man with a freeze ray, at the baseball game: this is fun. y....yes.
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Oct 17, 2020 22:35
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Extremely boring man flying his jetpack to local concerts (everything except rap and country) |
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Oct 17, 2020 23:26
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FutonForensic posted:*rips bodice open* "honey, i want to you fly up in the jetpack naked and rain jizz down on me. hose me down with your rocket seed" lol |
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Oct 17, 2020 23:38
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| # ? Apr 18, 2024 07:48 |
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Boring jet pack man has to have the jet pack maker's logo on his keyring, jacket, mousepad, baseball caps, etc. etc. All anyone gets him for Christmas is just tacky jet pack brand merch because nobody knows what he likes. |
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Oct 18, 2020 01:00
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