Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



who here was fathered?


my dad was an under cover cop in the 70s. many of his contemporaries ended up addicted to heroin but thankfully for you guys, my dad ended up busting dudes for lsd and weed and lived to penetrate my mother. originally she didnt know he was an undercover cop and he didnt seem to be bothered putting her in the danger he did.

his best story regarding that is busting a dude for lsd at a led zepplin concert. wow way to gently caress up a dudes night dad

growing up my dad was into motorcycles. he loved hondas. he also used to point at any other japanese motorcycle and call it jap crap. why werent hondas jap crap? they just arent ok. he also used to call harley davidsons tractors and go on and on about how lovely they were

hes 72 now or something and the other day went for a ride on the back of one and said "actually it was pretty good" thanks dad ive been telling everyone my whole life how harleys suck and now I have to call everyone and tell them I was wrong?

he used to have a pen that he would write around the edge of his cds with green opaque ink. god who got rich from that scam

my dad has an all in one pc which really was never very good. when it was new it could handle youtube fine but windows keeps undating itself under him and now hes on windows 10 and its soooo sloooow but he keeps saying to me "why is this so slow? its a good computer!" and I dont have the heart to tell him it never was

he's always buying socks he doesnt need and then giving them to me

other day my mum cooked steak when I was over and after ward he complained about the fat in the steak that it didnt taste good. wonder if anyone ever told him to cut off the fat if you dont like it. wonder if he complains that the drumsticks he had for dinner hurt his neck when he swallowed the bones

he keeps saying he has loads of cool cop stories to tell me. im sure he has a lot of intense stories he was a detective with the indecency squard, which was rapes and murders and etc. he keeps saying he'll tell me when im older. im 40 next year


when we were growing up my mum used to hide cigarettes under my brothers pillow so he could smoke them befure he was old enough to buy them. idk why she did this because honestly thats terrible parenting, but he always used to say to my brother "ill give you a smack around the ear if I catch you smoking" which of course he never did, teaching my brother that actions dont have consequences. and as soon as my brother turned 16 and was old enough to buy ciagreetes well then he just did anyway

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



please share some anecdotes. no one can stop you posting depressing as hell stories but Im sure most people dont want their day ruined so keep that in mind before you release

polyester concept
Mar 29, 2017



my dad is almost 80 and has terminal fox news brain
he bought a $1400 VCR in 1989, i remember it always ate tapes
i don't recall any instances of him playing with me as a kid, or giving me any physical affection, which explains why i post here

rotor
Jun 11, 2001

Official Carrier
of the Neil Bush Torch

 
 
 
 
teh butts


echinopsis posted:

he also used to call harley davidsons tractors and go on and on about how lovely they were

well they were

rotor
Jun 11, 2001

Official Carrier
of the Neil Bush Torch

 
 
 
 
teh butts


my dad built nuclear warheads so if it wasn't for him you'd all be speaking russian by now (except for those of you who speak russian of course, nothing would appreciably change for you)

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



rotor posted:

well they were

this may be true, but im not sure why its an opinion a child and or young adult that shows no interest in any motorcycle needs to hear

rotor
Jun 11, 2001

Official Carrier
of the Neil Bush Torch

 
 
 
 
teh butts


how else will they know that harleys suck? its just basic knowledge that kids need to know. I didn't show any interest in european history but they taught me anyway.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



polyester concept posted:

my dad is almost 80 and has terminal fox news brain
he bought a $1400 VCR in 1989, i remember it always ate tapes
i don't recall any instances of him playing with me as a kid, or giving me any physical affection, which explains why i post here

yeah I dont rememver my dad showing affection. he must have done some stuff with me as a kid but i dont remember much. he used to go out fishing lots.


recently lol on a facetime i had had a couple and i said "love ya" to both my parents, neither used to say it to us but my mum has embraced my kids saying it and says it back to them, kinda opened the door to it happening between me and her, but when I said it to my dad he was like "uhhh you know how I feel" or something



whenever I get a haircut my dad always calls it gay. i tell him my GIRLfriend really likes it. he also wears sometimes a shirt that has more than 1 colour and is like "check out this GAY shirt im wearing" in a stereotypical camp voice

thankfully for him im a pathetic slab of a human being that is unable to say anything back to him like "that hurst the feelings of people on the internet" so hell probably keep calling my haircut gay until dies



the worst day tho will be the day he cant drive anymore. gently caress he will be miserable to be around

Displeased Moo Cow
Jun 15, 2009

The Journey BeginsTM


my dad plays a mean guitar.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



rotor posted:

how else will they know that harleys suck? its just basic knowledge that kids need to know. I didn't show any interest in european history but they taught me anyway.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



Displeased Moo Cow posted:

my dad plays a mean guitar.

when my dad would drive me and my friends around he'd always listen to his fuckin rodney crowel and other country bullshit real loud and drum along on the dash. not necessarily to the song, in time but just a generic rythm

anyway my friends always gave me poo poo that my dad should have a dashboard drum set

Displeased Moo Cow
Jun 15, 2009

The Journey BeginsTM


my dad still insists on using his MacBook Pro 2006/7 to lay down his tracks because “it’s fine” even though logic 7 is no longer supported and that MacBook is no longer supported. the 54000 HDd is a bit tired now. he puts the laptop on bits of 4x2 and has a USB fan pointed towards the laptop to “keep it cool”.

for about 2 years he refused to use logic X. he gave reasons but they were all boomer reasons (ain’t broke, I already paid etc..)

two years ago my sister and I bought him an iMac with logic x on it and he basically uses that as a photo montage screen saver thing, and to play tumblebugs.

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



sounds like your dad owns

psiox
Oct 15, 2001

Babylon 5 Street Team

biological parents are by definition monsters who have no problem creating more fodder for capitalism. though it's not like they put a ton of thought into it most cases. but my obligatory adultlike milestones!

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



what

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?


my dad loves me and can fix most things that aren’t electrical. he’ll fix a car and build a shed and install a sewer line. he spends most of his time in the garage

he has been driving around with the same bob Marley cd in his car for the last 15 years

polyester concept
Mar 29, 2017



wanna meet that dad

FMguru
Sep 10, 2003

peed on;
sexually

my dad died way too young (dont smoke, kids). he was a good dad. i miss him every day

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

looking forward to taco tuesday!


Slippery Tilde

my dad was brain poisoned by limbaugh too and it ended up making my mom divorce him

he was a completely absentee parent but he got into computers in the 80s because he did production work for tv, like video editing and graphics and stuff, so when he got rid of the home office he wanted a computer in the house so we ended up being one of the first houses in the neighborhood to get a pc and internet

i don't really talk to him much anymore but the last time i saw his home setup he had three monitors plugged into his laptop that he was using to day trade

rotor
Jun 11, 2001

Official Carrier
of the Neil Bush Torch

 
 
 
 
teh butts


either congratulations on or RIP to your inheritance

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

looking forward to taco tuesday!


Slippery Tilde

lol yeah, almost certainly the latter

fingats crossed tho, also it's basically impossible to disinherit your family in louisiana

FMguru
Sep 10, 2003

peed on;
sexually

im lucky, my dad got leftier as he aged

the running joke at his memorial service was my brother and i arguing about who would tell the fbi that they could close his file

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

looking forward to taco tuesday!


Slippery Tilde

hahaha

my stepdad grew up in a commune, for awhile there he refused to set foot in a whole foods because they were union busters. i think he's mellowed on that though

i haven't asked but i'm sure he's annoying my lib mom about how he's not gonna vote biden

cheque_some
Dec 6, 2006
The Wizard of Menlo Park

my dad had one of those cordless phone/answering machine combos and i guess he decided the speaker on the answering machine wasn't loud enough because he had alligator clips coming out of it going to a 6" car speaker on the counter

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



my dad is a good dad that has been brain poisoned by facebook and is now in a medically induced coma because he was "living without fear" and his poker buddy that "tested negative on a rapid test" gave him the rona 4 weeks ago. over three weeks with straight fever and 11 days in the icu at max oxygen and 24/7 breathing assistance and he finally had to be put on a ventilator yesterday.

Displeased Moo Cow
Jun 15, 2009

The Journey BeginsTM


oh poo poo dude

polyester concept
Mar 29, 2017



yeah gently caress

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



DADCHAT


our last conversation was me suggesting that his fat gut was actually him unwittingly preparing for a period of time induced. it's like a camel's hump. he laughed. i told him he was gonna look like a basset hound when we get him home.

2 in 3 chance at best we get that, but so far things are positive.

FMguru
Sep 10, 2003

peed on;
sexually

fingers crossed for you and your dad, mr. nice

gently caress this loving coronavirus, and triple gently caress the current administration for its completely and utterly botched handling of it

The Management
Jan 2, 2010

sup, bitch?


don’t let your dads go out. dads want to go out, they’re like dogs, but you have to keep them inside for their own safety.

I had a talk with my dad about taking this corona virus thing seriously and he’s been pretty good since then

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



The Management posted:

don’t let your dads go out. dads want to go out, they’re like dogs, but you have to keep them inside for their own safety.

I had a talk with my dad about taking this corona virus thing seriously and he’s been pretty good since then

i got mine to wear masks to home depot and stores but that’s as far as any of us kids could get.

keep your dads on a leash, people! they cannot be trusted with their own well being.

Perplx
Jun 26, 2004


Best viewed on Orgasma Plasma

Lipstick Apathy

my dad was a lefty, he was head of the local farmers union, but late in life he became a long haul trucker
he started listening to Alex Jones and now he's thoroughly brain poisoned

rotor
Jun 11, 2001

Official Carrier
of the Neil Bush Torch

 
 
 
 
teh butts


Propaganda works on everyone. It'll even work on you.

Perplx
Jun 26, 2004


Best viewed on Orgasma Plasma

Lipstick Apathy

I don't know, my dad was never knowledgable about computers, so he doesn't know how to vet a source, he thinks facebook posts are real because he first logged on in his 70s. I like to think my internet savviness will always be relevant, but who knows.

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

looking forward to taco tuesday!


Slippery Tilde

actually i'm immune to propaganda and marketing

you see, i lack the delta brainwave

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

I MEAN, TURN OFF YOURE MONITOR, MIGTH EXPLAIN YOUR BAD POSTS, HOPE THIS HELPS?!



BVMF was a lawyer who went from center-right to screaming Marxist after he retired and started volunteering more and taking a Marx course at his alma mater (they let olds take a class in the hopes they'll contribute or some poo poo).

E: He used to bring home Computers Shopper (back when it was the size of a goddamn Yellow Pages (back when there were such things as Yellow Pages, I mean?)) and we'd design systems we'd never be able to afford.

Best Bi Geek Squid
Mar 25, 2016


my dad is probably on the autism spectrum and is very much in his own world about everything. He's generally very sweet but he used to get frustrated a lot and just generally acts like a huge dummy when it comes to any sort of social interaction. this sort of worked when my mom was around, but when she split he was responsible for raising three kids which he was just completely unequipped for.

my sisters have a lot of anger towards him, mostly because of what he failed to do. Personally I've made my peace. we get breakfast every week and he likes that. He'll tell me all about whatever physics or philosophy problem he's obsessed with and we'll talk about politics or other subjects he likes, like military history and his football team.

when we were little he used to make up all sorts of silly songs about our pets. All of us kids continue that tradition with our own

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



Mr. Nice! posted:

my dad is a good dad that has been brain poisoned by facebook and is now in a medically induced coma because he was "living without fear" and his poker buddy that "tested negative on a rapid test" gave him the rona 4 weeks ago. over three weeks with straight fever and 11 days in the icu at max oxygen and 24/7 breathing assistance and he finally had to be put on a ventilator yesterday.

mate :/

echinopsis
Apr 13, 2004



Best Bi Geek Squid posted:


when we were little he used to make up all sorts of silly songs about our pets. All of us kids continue that tradition with our own

i like this

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Poopernickel
Oct 28, 2005

electricity bad

Fun Shoe

My dad is/was a pretty middle-of-the road dad, quality-wise.

Now that I'm an adult with a kid of my own, I appreciate that I could have done much worse! I'll be content if my kid describes me the same way.

He's been working on his guitar skills for 30 years, and he's still not very good. But even if he has no pitch or rhythm, he's at least got grit

Poopernickel fucked around with this message at 00:03 on Oct 22, 2020

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply