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g me how to shitpost |
# ? Oct 28, 2020 20:47 |
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# ? Mar 28, 2024 22:33 |
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"approach the keyboard" *I step closer to the keyboard and he shakes his head* "do it again"
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 20:47 |
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Mark Rippetoe, creator of the Starting Strength fitness program, taught me that 2 gallons of milk is the perfect daily provider of fats, proteins and sugars necessary for optimal shitposting
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 20:49 |
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i come out of the dressing room and pose for mark but he shakes his head, I try several more outfits and get similar responses from mark, his anger grows and he presses stop on the tape player just as right said fred were getting to the chorus of i'm too sexy. he exits the room and slams the door behind him.
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 20:53 |
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some posting circles are adamant in using a ironic-unironic or "supine" style. I (Mark Rippetoe) emphasize a more foundational, genuine sincereposting style as this mitigates the risk of secondary or tertiary cringe
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 20:58 |
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I bought that book many years ago because a bunch of goons told me to. The first sentence in that book is, no joke, "Physical strength is the most important thing in life." Rippetoe then goes on to explain how some people consider intellectual or spiritual pursuits to be more important, but those people are incorrect, and they'd change their mind if they could squat more. What follows is like 400 pages of the most dense, unreadable anatomy textbook you can imagine, with occasional bits of instruction on how to exercise. I read that whole book and it was the worst experience of my life. 10/10, would recommend.
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:01 |
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blaise rascal posted:I bought that book many years ago because a bunch of goons told me to. The first sentence in that book is, no joke, "Physical strength is the most important thing in life." Rippetoe then goes on to explain how some people consider intellectual or spiritual pursuits to be more important, but those people are incorrect, and they'd change their mind if they could squat more. What follows is like 400 pages of the most dense, unreadable anatomy textbook you can imagine, with occasional bits of instruction on how to exercise. I read that whole book and it was the worst experience of my life. 10/10, would recommend. You cannot perform optimal lifts (or shitposts) without a thorough understanding of the underlying mechanisms that power your movements (or posts)! To think otherwise is a hollow existence!
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:04 |
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my keyboard is covered in blood, but mark won't let me stop
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:08 |
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fitness. posting etiquette. culture. this man is a sage.
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:08 |
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I wonder what Mark would say if I asked him why he was so red
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:11 |
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also, what the gently caress does "Bellmawr is Everybody" mean
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:16 |
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blaise rascal posted:also, what the gently caress does "Bellmawr is Everybody" mean
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:18 |
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how about this mark my pants when i rippeass
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:23 |
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ah, yes. explains everything. i regret doubting you, mark
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:35 |
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i found mark sleeping in a broken down ford fiesta parked in front of my house have not enough people been supporting him? |
# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:43 |
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Luvcow posted:i found mark sleeping in a broken down ford fiesta parked in front of my house Mark Rippetoe knows better than anyone that the only thing you can rely on for support is a strong lower back, built up by a linear progression of compound lifts
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 21:50 |
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hey mark thanks for making my body look like what you think a teenage mutant ninja turtle (live action i'm talking secret of the ooze era) would look like without its shell also operating under the assumption that their body occupies every single bit of space inside the shell you can't see
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 22:04 |
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All I want to know is how Mark got his namesake toes so ripped |
# ? Oct 28, 2020 22:19 |
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(shot of a set of soft flabby toes and a post with no empty quotes) "Is this you?" |
# ? Oct 28, 2020 22:22 |
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google THIS posted:All I want to know is how Mark got his namesake toes so ripped the name is pronounced "Rip-a-toe", so I think it's from absorbing the toes of those too weak to defy him
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 22:26 |
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If he's so strong how come his toes ripped.
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# ? Oct 28, 2020 23:06 |
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More interested in Minnie Ripperton tbh. |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 00:32 |
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the core of building shitposting strength is reps. "knife to meet you" "again" "knife to meet you" "again" "knife to meet you" "again" "knife to meeet you" "no, no, no! your form is getting sloppy!"
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 01:00 |
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on your next workout, add 2.5 knife to your knife load |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 01:13 |
Physical fitness is cool for other people.
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 01:21 |
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I keep starting to gain strength but I never seem to get to the end
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 02:19 |
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MR: Are you a shitposter? Me: Yes. MR: I can't hear you, I said ARE YOU A SHITPOSTER? Me: YES! MR: (hopefully) And are you into fitness? Me: Fitness whole burriot in my mouth. MR: I've taught you all I can. |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 02:21 |
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google THIS posted:MR: Are you a shitposter? |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 02:32 |
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Manifisto posted:the core of building shitposting strength is reps. google THIS posted:MR: Are you a shitposter?
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 02:49 |
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mark rippetoe: proper shitpost form. activate your core, like you’re gonna poop me: i can clench my core already though mark rippetoe: DO YOU WANT STRENGTH OR NOT DO A POOPY CLENCH |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 03:52 |
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Macnult posted:mark rippetoe: proper shitpost form. activate your core, like you’re gonna poop mark rippetoe: squeeze your glutes, hard enough that you go crosseyed me *squeezing my butt real hard*: hnngh mark rippetoe: heh heh. mark you old scamp. made a fool out of them again with the old squeezy butt trick me *still crosseyed*: what was that?? what was that mark?? mark rippetoe: heh heh. nothing at all. nothing at all
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 05:31 |
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FutonForensic posted:mark rippetoe: squeeze your glutes, hard enough that you go crosseyed
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 05:37 |
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FutonForensic posted:mark rippetoe: squeeze your glutes, hard enough that you go crosseyed hahaha |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 06:37 |
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Minnie Riperton said "Lovin' you is easy 'cause you're beautiful," and "makin' love with you is all I want to do." Sounds like a five star work out to me. |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 07:54 |
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stop do it again. this time, very carefully
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 12:45 |
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In case you thought i was joking
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 16:30 |
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Shitposting is the most important thing in life. This is true whether we want it to be or not. As humanity has developed throughout history, shitposting has become less critical to our daily existence, but no less important to our lives. Our posts, more than any other thing we possess, still determines the quality and the quantity of our time here in these forums. Whereas previously our posting strength determined how many emptyquotes we got and whether we got banned, it now merely determines how chill we stay in these trying surroundings we have found ourselves in as world crises have accumulated. But we are still orbs -- our chill existence is, in the final analysis, the only one that actually matters. A cynical misanthrope is not as happy as that same man would be if he were chill. This reality is offensive to some people who would like the GBS or Coupons and Deals to take precedence. It is instructive to see what happens to these very people as they smoke more weed. |
# ? Oct 30, 2020 20:05 |
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lmao
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 21:24 |
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google THIS posted:Shitposting is the most important thing in life. This is true whether we want it to be or not. As humanity has developed throughout history, shitposting has become less critical to our daily existence, but no less important to our lives. Our posts, more than any other thing we possess, still determines the quality and the quantity of our time here in these forums. Whereas previously our posting strength determined how many emptyquotes we got and whether we got banned, it now merely determines how chill we stay in these trying surroundings we have found ourselves in as world crises have accumulated. But we are still orbs -- our chill existence is, in the final analysis, the only one that actually matters. A cynical misanthrope is not as happy as that same man would be if he were chill. This reality is offensive to some people who would like the GBS or Coupons and Deals to take precedence. It is instructive to see what happens to these very people as they smoke more weed. powerful hovertext contender
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# ? Oct 30, 2020 22:16 |
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# ? Mar 28, 2024 22:33 |
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google THIS posted:Shitposting is the most important thing in life. This is true whether we want it to be or not. As humanity has developed throughout history, shitposting has become less critical to our daily existence, but no less important to our lives. Our posts, more than any other thing we possess, still determines the quality and the quantity of our time here in these forums. Whereas previously our posting strength determined how many emptyquotes we got and whether we got banned, it now merely determines how chill we stay in these trying surroundings we have found ourselves in as world crises have accumulated. But we are still orbs -- our chill existence is, in the final analysis, the only one that actually matters. A cynical misanthrope is not as happy as that same man would be if he were chill. This reality is offensive to some people who would like the GBS or Coupons and Deals to take precedence. It is instructive to see what happens to these very people as they smoke more weed. |
# ? Oct 31, 2020 01:34 |