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A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



Let's all be honest with ourselves, Ready Player One was the greatest book ever written AND the greatest film ever filmed. Ernest Cline (and to a much lesser extent, Steven Spielberg) created the most vibrant and original world ever made, one filled with deep characters. The book was overflowing with heart, humor, and a whole lot of amazing writing. So it's not shock that a sequel was going to come out. Is it as good as the original? Well, I'll let you be the judge. Please use this thread to share your thoughts on Ready Player Two and to share your favorite passages. Here's mine:


Wade pulled up in his custom Batmobile. It looked like the Batmobile from the 1989 film, but with a few extras. Wade had outfitted it with a flux capacitor for time travel, for starters. The steering wheel glistened with buttons, like the car from Speed Racer, the Mach 1.

"Wow, Wade, that's a really great car! How'd you get it?" Michael J Fox stood in front of the car, eyeing it up.

"Well, Mr. Fox, it's easy when you're the new CEO of whatever company created this virtual world. You get some perks." With that, Wade honked the horn. It made the noise of the siren from Ecto-1, the car in Ghostbusters, Ghostbusters 2, and The Real Ghostbusters cartoon.

"Cool!" said Michael J Fox. "I love that franchise!"

Suddenly, there was a huge explosion from the top of a building. Not just any building, it was Nakatomi Plaza. Not the real one, the digital copy. But Wade used his extensive knowledge of pop culture to recognize it. This was from the movie Die Hard, which meant only one thing - terrorists.

"Time to make the call. Mr. Fox, I'm sorry but I have to assemble my elite anti-terrorism squad."

Michael J Fox shook Wade's hand and logged out. Within moments, Wade's squad arrived. The first to arrive was, of course, Buzz Lightyear. Close by was Bishop from the movie Aliens. And then, perhaps the most powerful member of all, David the Gnome. David had a solemn look on his face. He was a haunted gnome, tired of all the killing but fully aware that he was saving countless lives by doing it. The final member showed up, fashionably late as always. Wade yelled at her.

"Hey, Strawberry Shortcake, this is an anti-terrorism mission! Not a picnic!"

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GATOS Y VATOS
Aug 22, 2002



Movie makes 15 billion dollars

GolfHole
Feb 26, 2004



i called the cops on this book, i dont care

Chrs
Sep 21, 2015



This time everyone is a pop vinyl

I said come in!
Jun 22, 2004



I unironically liked the movie. It removed a lot of the dumb writing of the book and trimmed it down into something that made a lot more sense. The only people that didn't like it, were nerds trying too hard.

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is


I read the first one on audiobook when I had an audible subscription because I was in the mood for something light and fun and it apparently got decent reviews (at least according to the quotes on the cover!). It was the worst book I've ever made it through, and I only did because I was out of credits and hate-listened to see how bad it would get.

My favorite part is when he takes great pains to explain that you're sort of not really a virgin if you use hyper-realistic sex dolls because of how accurate they are. Did that scene make it into the movie?

I said come in!
Jun 22, 2004



Doctor J Off posted:

I read the first one on audiobook when I had an audible subscription because I was in the mood for something light and fun and it apparently got decent reviews (at least according to the quotes on the cover!). It was the worst book I've ever made it through, and I only did because I was out of credits and hate-listened to see how bad it would get.

My favorite part is when he takes great pains to explain that you're sort of not really a virgin if you use hyper-realistic sex dolls because of how accurate they are. Did that scene make it into the movie?

No, thank god. The character is a total nice guy loser and gets called out on it in the film.

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



Chrs posted:

This time everyone is a pop vinyl

My favorite "meta moment" is when Wade picks up a pop vinyl version of himself! Hey Funko, if you're listening - gimme a pop of Wade holding a tiny pop version of himself! Popception!

DemoneeHo
Nov 8, 2017

Come on hee-ho, just give us 300 more macca




Does this one also involve the reenactment of Monty Python and the Holy Grail as its climax?

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



DemoneeHo posted:

Does this one also involve the reenactment of Monty Python and the Holy Grail as its climax?

No, in this one (SPOILER ALERT!)

Hulk Hogan shows up to wrestle the main villain (who is basically Skeletor and Mumm-Ra in one) and Wade gets to do a super powered diving elbow off the top of the steel cage. Then Link from the Legend of Zelda tosses Wade the Master Sword to finish the job, and Wade says "Looks like you're about to get a little head!" Which doesn't make a ton of sense but I was shaking with excitement at this point anyway.

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is


DemoneeHo posted:

Does this one also involve the reenactment of Monty Python and the Holy Grail as its climax?

Oh my god I forgot about this. It's all coming back.

Glad to hear about the commentary on the book in the movie though. Shades of Dr. Strangelove

gleebster
Dec 16, 2006

Only a howler

Pillbug

I neither read Ready Player One nor saw the movie. And it was because of commentary like that in this thread. You're doing God's work, OP.

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER
Nov 11, 2020


Doctor J Off posted:

I read the first one on audiobook when I had an audible subscription because I was in the mood for something light and fun and it apparently got decent reviews (at least according to the quotes on the cover!). It was the worst book I've ever made it through, and I only did because I was out of credits and hate-listened to see how bad it would get.

did the person reading it have a high pitched nerd voice like the "i am a gamer" guy because that would be perfect

Horrible Butts
May 7, 2012


Only on chapter 3 of Ready Player Two but had to share this epic bit of prose before someone else did:

"In the film, a band of kids who live in the "Goon Docks" neighborhood of Astoria, Oregon, attempt to save their homes from foreclosure and, in doing so, they discover an old treasure map that takes them on an adventure to unearth the long-lost fortune of One-Eyed Willy, a legendary 17th-century pirate. During the adventure, they are chased by a family of criminals who want the treasure for themselves."

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



I just can't put this thing down. A really great part here:

Johnny 5 had been reprogrammed by the Shredder into a literal killing machine. The Foot Clan had grown in power over the past three months, adding deadly new members such as Gary Busey and The Chatterer from Hellraiser.

"Johnny 5 alive... but you will be.... dead!" beeped and booped the once-lovable robot, who now craved only death.

The Ninja Turtles, fearing the power of the Foot Clan, had recruited some help of their own. Wade, who had become a master of all martial arts between the events of the first book and this one, was made honorary leader. And joining them were the deadliest martial artists of all time - Gizmo from Gremlins, Mr. Miyagi, Snake Plissken, and Monster in my Pocket. A battle was brewing, one that would change the digital world forever.

Suddenly, a shuriken flew through the air and hit Johnny 5. It was embossed with a familiar logo - the Rebel Alliance logo!

"Hey, Johnny 5! Looks like you're about to be 5 feet under!" screamed Luke Skywalker. He brought his blade down. It was no longer a lightsaber, as he had lost that in a duel with the Kurrgan from Highlander. No, this time he brought down the Sword of Omens. Somewhere, Lion-O smiled.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


That’s my script you son of a BITCH, you stole it from the coffee shop hrrrrnnnnnggggvg!

Lt. Cock
May 28, 2005

INCOMING!

I don’t know what’s real anymore.

Horrible Butts
May 7, 2012


Katamari Democracy
Jan 18, 2010

Oh, We understand.
A trip to collect a million votes, yes.
Oh, we know why.
We get the point of rolling up a million


Wedge Regret

A Fancy Hat posted:

Let's all be honest with ourselves, Ready Player One was the greatest book ever written

Uhh. No. You are wrong.

Fagmaster
Aug 21, 2004



more like ready player poo

Katamari Democracy
Jan 18, 2010

Oh, We understand.
A trip to collect a million votes, yes.
Oh, we know why.
We get the point of rolling up a million


Wedge Regret

Ready player voted 1

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



Katamari Democracy posted:

Uhh. No. You are wrong.

I haven't finished Ready Player Two yet, hold on. At that point I'd be willing to call it the greatest book of all time, but I need to finish it first!

Katamari Democracy
Jan 18, 2010

Oh, We understand.
A trip to collect a million votes, yes.
Oh, we know why.
We get the point of rolling up a million


Wedge Regret

A Fancy Hat posted:

I haven't finished Ready Player Two yet, hold on. At that point I'd be willing to call it the greatest book of all time, but I need to finish it first!

Please do not.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Horrible Butts
May 7, 2012


Do you think the third book will be called “Ready Player Three” or will he spice it up?
I think it should be “Ready Player Trilogy,” trilogies are a thing classic nerds can’t get enough of.

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



Horrible Butts posted:

Do you think the third book will be called “Ready Player Three” or will he spice it up?
I think it should be “Ready Player Trilogy,” trilogies are a thing classic nerds can’t get enough of.

If you're on the RPO (ready player one) subreddit, you'll find that a lot of us "Cline-heads" think he's going to call it Ready Player Three: Revenge of the Player. That's a bit of a clever insider reference itself, which seems right up Mr. Cline's alley.

I've also heard rumors of "Ready Player Trois", where you'd get to explore a digital version of France, and all the famous french pop culture characters. Can you say "spin-off"?

dads friend steve
Dec 24, 2004





drat this looks good as hell. All my fave brands together at last

Apathetic Artist
Dec 23, 2010


The first book has a queer black women who's totally down with her best friend using homophobic slurs. Wonder what other great well rounded character Cline will include in the sequel?

dads friend steve
Dec 24, 2004





Gamemaster Anthony at least seemed like an alright guy

Horrible Butts
May 7, 2012


I heard the plan is to make five books in all but to humorously call it a “trilogy” as an homage to the feeling of backflipping on to a knife dick first.

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the President is dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin



Irsh posted:

The first book has a queer black women who's totally down with her best friend using homophobic slurs. Wonder what other great well rounded character Cline will include in the sequel?

Sounds like you might be interested in "Stacy VonStacked". She's Wade's new best friend, and a girl, and she reveals that actually most women want to be with a nice gamer guy. There's a really sweet scene where Wade carries a hyper-printer across the cyber desert for her, and she rewards him with sex.

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is


HORSE-SLAUGHTERER posted:

did the person reading it have a high pitched nerd voice like the "i am a gamer" guy because that would be perfect

It was Will Wheaton, so yeah basically

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is


Irsh posted:

The first book has a queer black women who's totally down with her best friend using homophobic slurs. Wonder what other great well rounded character Cline will include in the sequel?

Remember her avatar is a white dude though, so we get treated as a throwaway line at the end of the book "also I'm gay and black"

Blurry Gray Thing
Jun 3, 2009



That's just like in that movie I liked.

Progject
Apr 23, 2006



I pull up in my pop culture reference-fuelled vehicle that I won in a loot crate and start strutting down the digital street just getting so many chicks.

Diorama
Apr 17, 2006

i remember when all this was fields

Horrible Butts posted:

Only on chapter 3 of Ready Player Two but had to share this epic bit of prose before someone else did:

"In the film, a band of kids who live in the "Goon Docks" neighborhood of Astoria, Oregon, attempt to save their homes from foreclosure and, in doing so, they discover an old treasure map that takes them on an adventure to unearth the long-lost fortune of One-Eyed Willy, a legendary 17th-century pirate. During the adventure, they are chased by a family of criminals who want the treasure for themselves."

that reads like a TV-Guide summary

crazy eyes mustafa
Nov 29, 2014


Doctor J Off posted:

Remember her avatar is a white dude though, so we get treated as a throwaway line at the end of the book "also I'm gay and black"

“I suppose you were wondering why I had an ‘n pass’ this entire time”

crazy eyes mustafa
Nov 29, 2014


Lmao at creating characters whose sole purpose is to enable the protagonist to use gamer words. Well played

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013



I'm so horned up from reading this thread and remembering things I've seen before that I don't even care what's real!
Wow!

Son of Rodney
Feb 22, 2006

ohmygodohmygodohmygod



idgaf about goon consensus, the movie was entertaining and the idea of a super anti social nerd creating a game on the only thing important to him, his nerd hobbies, and an entire cult of people learning all about it to get his wealth is pretty funny and plausible

Too bad the author actually was the super nerd. Not going to read the second one though.

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Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013



Can you tell me at what point Somic the Hammed Hog joins battle and brings it in with all his friends to make it the best birthday ever?
I can't wait.

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