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Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

Must be fuckin' nice!







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The single most important link you can have: The Official Goonscape Discord, Where everybody knows your shitposts
***NOTE: New discord members must be manually approved by a discord admin, which generally happens rather quickly, but will happen even more quickly if you drop a post in this thread, letting us know that you are a goon and not a bot.***

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What is Runescape?

Runescape is one of the longest-running MMORPGs in existence. Originally released in 2001, it has been recognized by the Guinness Book of World Records as the world's largest and most-updated free MMORPG with over 200 million accounts created.

Set in the land of Gielinor, you are the lowly shitfarmer protagonist set out to right wrongs and wrong rights on your way to fame, fortune, and a good time.

Originally a browser-based Java behemoth, Runescape is now a client-based game with Windows, macOS, Linux, iOS, and Android versions, in addition to being available through Steam. You can now mine rocks for fish from the comfort of your own phone or tablet while ignoring your real-world responsibilities 24/7.

Here, have a video to increase your foundational interaction with the game like a good zoomer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb19KRIlfLQ


Why should I play some 20-year-old game with 30-year-old graphics?

Runescape's largest claim-to-fame is, and has always been, its Pavlovian exploitation of your dopamine reactions to get you to grind xp to fill up your nerd bars for its now impressive array of 27 individual skills over up to 120 levels each (and beyond). To do so, you'll need to repetitively click, click, click your way through and endless series of tasks to generate that sweet, sweet XP that your body will be trained to crave.

Wait, so this is like Cookie Clicker?

In a way, yes. This game fulfills a lot of the same psychological functions as an incremental clicker game, so much so that there is a literal incremental clicker game based off of the skills and items present in-game. However, it's not as direct an analogue, as the game breaks down into a series of sequential tasks to perform for each skill that are often intermingled with other skills.

For instance, you could click a rock to mine some ore, and you'll have the option of (a) clicking once and waiting for your inventory to slowly fill, (b) clicking a new rock about every 30-40 seconds to fill your inventory much faster, or (c) clicking rocks every 2.5 seconds to get a small increase in mining rate over Option B.
Once you've filled up your bag with ore, you need to run them back to your ore storage in town (either a bank or a furnace), and once you've collected a satisfactory number of ore, you can swap over to crafting the ore into bars at a furnace, and then the bars into items at an anvil, each step having its own variable trade-off of speed vs. interactivity.

It's all about personal pacing, and what you want out of the game. The only thing that is critical to min-max in the game is your shitposting skills, as that is the only way to command the respect and admiration of your fellow goons, who after 2 decades of clicking rocks, have nothing else left to live for.

Also, cosmetic microtransactions out the loving wazoo:
https://i.imgur.com/OTW4BUg.gifv



So, what sort of content does it offer beyond repetitive clicking?

Well, with 20 years of development, Runescape also offers all of the following delightful, and enjoyable activities to distract you from the hollow ennui that threatens to overwhelm your life:

  • A robust combat system in 3 levels of interactivity (similar to how the skilling offers AFK, semi-AFK, and highly intensive versions).
  • Group dungeons and Raids.
  • 227 quests that range from a from a few minutes to several hours in duration. In addition, many of the later quests are fully-voice acted. For bitter MMO vets, very few of these amount to the "fetch 12 goblin asses" variety, and often involve puzzles, combat, and problem-solving.
  • Solo and group-based minigames. Some are PvE, while others are PvP.
  • A fully fleshed-out achievement system full of interesting tasks with significant rewards.
  • Fully-customizable luxury player-owned housing.
  • Infinite pubbies to torment and/or assist, as you will.
  • 3 alternate game modes: Hardcore (perma-death), Ironman (you cannot interact with other players or the economy, save to chat), and the dreaded Combination Hardcore Ironman.

Additionally, and this cannot be stressed enough, this game has been under active development for TWENTY GODDAMN YEARS. New skills get released, new quests, new dungeons, new raids, and they even make an effort to go back and polish and/or completely overhaul old content to free the game of the cruft of a lifetime of tacking new poo poo on.

Uh huh. So what does membership get me?

Honestly, everything. The game's almost unplayable without some sort of subscription (membership). You can grab a free account, log in, do all the tutorial stuff, but 99% of the interesting bits of the game are locked behind a subscription. Now, you might be scrunching up your nose at dropping a month to play an MMO in TYOOL 2020, and if so, that's cool too, because you rapidly get to the point where you can purchase play-time with in-game money on the regular, to at least keep yourself active, although it requires a bit of daily play to do so.

This poo poo is way too fancy. Where is the Runescape of my youth?

So, many years ago, Runescape followed the path of asexual reproduction, and split itself into 2 versions of itself, the current Runescape (also known as Runescape 3), and the 2007-era version of Runescape, currently marketed as Old-School Runescape. Both versions are entirely separate from each other, save that a single membership entitles you to all of the membership benefits in both versions. Goons have solid representation in both games, and they both appeal to different types of players, so feel free to give both a try. Notably, both are under active development with their own independent dev teams and receive entirely different (although sometimes similar) content.

Ok, suppose I'm the sort of sucker that wants to waste the remains of my miserable life in pursuit of this game, ignoring my pending worldly responsibilities, what do I need to know?

The single most important link you can have: The Official Goonscape Discord, Where everybody knows your shitposts
***NOTE: New discord members must be manually approved by a discord admin, which generally happens rather quickly, but will happen even more quickly if you drop a post in this thread, letting us know that you are a goon and not a bot.***

Additionally, to join the clan in-game (for RS3), do the following:
  • Click this button to open the "Community" window:
  • With this window open, make sure you have the middle green icon highlighted in the bottom righ t
  • Click this button in the lower right and type in GoonScape :
  • This will get you into clan guest chat. Ask there for a proper clan invite. If nobody's around, try asking again later or in Discord.

First and foremost, you'll want to get the client:
RS3

OSRS

The official wikis (do not use, link to, or otherwise access the Fandom-based wikis, they are ad-encrusted pieces of poo poo):

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If you've read this far, and surely nobody of good character or upbringing would, here's some other info about the game that may appeal to you:

Skills:
Skills are the meat of this game. Almost everything revolves around training them to their maximum level of 99 (or 120 for new/updated skills) and beyond, and below are quick and brief descriptions about each of them below (Members-only skills, that are capped at level 5 for non-members are designated with Ⓜ):
  • Attack - Determines melee combat accuracy and ability to equip (most) melee weapons. Melee combat is strong against ranged, but weak against magic.
  • Strength - Determines how hard you hit with melee combat, and whether or not you can lift boulders above your head.
  • Defence - Your chance of avoiding taking damage, as well as what armors you’re capable of equipping.
  • Ranged - Your skill with ranged weapons, from bows to crossbows, and even chakrams for the Xenas at heart. Ranged is weak to melee, but strong against magic.
  • Magic - A skill that works in both combat and skilling. You can cast spells using runes to hurt monsters, enchant jewelry, teleport and more. Magic is strong against melee but weak against ranged.
  • Constitution – Your health. If it hits 0, you die. Raise it to improve your HP and healing from various foods.
  • Prayer - How much the gods of Gielinor will grant benefits to you. Burying, offering and scattering bits of dead monsters and players will get this stat up.
  • Runecrafting - Craft runes used to power Magic spells. Since the introduction of the Runespan mini-game and its rewards, this has significantly improved.
  • Dungeoneering – A rogue-like mini-game for solo or group play. Unlocks additional combat and skilling areas in the overworld.
  • Crafting – The root skill for making leather, pottery, cloth, wood, and other non-smithable products.
  • Mining - Harvest ore used in Smithing and Crafting.
  • Smithing - Use your ore to craft weapons and armor, including some of the strongest obtainable melee armor in the game.
  • Fishing - The primary diet in Gielinor appears to be seafood, based on the sheer volume of fish consumed by players.
  • Cooking – Creates food used as the primary healing method in combat.
  • Firemaking – Originally a test skill, somehow they left it in to become benchmark for the least interesting skill possible.
  • Woodcutting – Harvest lumber for use in the Fletching and Firemaking skills.
  • Farming Ⓜ – Combination Monster Rancher and Animal Crossing, you can both create your own personal farm to breed animals, and plant and grow fruits, vegetables, herbs, flowers, bushes and trees throughout the world.
  • Fletching Ⓜ – Allows for the creation of ranged weapons and ammunition.
  • Slayer Ⓜ - Targeted monster bounty system that doubles as a skill gate for the most lucrative high-end monsters.
  • Hunter Ⓜ - Poach and trap wildlife for their hides and bones, or capture various implings in jars like Pokemon.
  • Divination Ⓜ - Drain power from wisp colonies drawn to places of power throughout the land. Divine energy can be crafted into specialized items or used to power devices made from other skills.
  • Construction Ⓜ - Build your own house in a magic portal, where you can show off your wealth, store items, and house pets.
  • Agility Ⓜ – Trained in obstacle courses, this improves your stamina to allow for more time spent running, as well as unlocking shortcuts on the map.
  • Herblore Ⓜ – One of the most powerful skills in the game, allows for the creation of potions that give significant skill boosts and other effects.
  • Thieving Ⓜ – Allows you to steal from NPCs and pilfer certain treasure hoards.
  • Summoning Ⓜ – Create limited-time combat and skilling pets in order to assist you throughout the game.
  • Invention Ⓜ – The first Elite skill, used to disassemble items into scrap for the purpose of augmenting your weapons, armor and tools, and to create new technology to aid in combat and skilling.
  • Archaeology(non-members cap at level 20) – Unearth artifacts from various digsites around the world to unlock lore mysteries and gain mysterious powers.

Distractions and Diversions:

Personalized content:

All of the following are your personal player-owned locations that you can customize and upgrade as you see fit:

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Historical:

Thread 7 can be found here.
Thread 6 can be found here.
Thread 5 can be found here.
Thread 4 can be found here.
Thread 3 can be found here.
Thread 2 can be found here.
Thread 1 can be found here.

I credit and/or thank absolutely no-one for their words that I have shamelessly stolen. I didn't even want to have to write this OP.

Toshimo fucked around with this message at 03:08 on Dec 16, 2020

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Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

Must be fuckin' nice!


🔜
This space reserved for: One of the OSRS nerds to give me a bunch of OSRS content

Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

Must be fuckin' nice!


🔜

A cool and good piece of advice for returning goons about which quests to prioritize for ~gameplay~ purposes:

quote:

I'd say the most important milestones to hit, for every player are to (a) get access to Menaphos via Jack of Spades, which I think is really a goal for people with level ~20-30 in most skills, and (b) get access Prifidinas via Plague's End which has a ton of level ~75 requirements. The other Big drat Deal thing, to a certain extent, is to complete the megaquest Recipe for Disaster, which ahas a poo poo ton of rewards.

Beyond that, the important quest series to complete to really progress the story (and get a ton of xp, unlocks, and items) are:
- Elf: https://runescape.wiki/w/Elf_quest_series
- Myreque: https://runescape.wiki/w/Myreque_quest_series

Quests that are pretty mandatory for specific skills:

Agility - Monkey Madness
Construction - Love Story
Cooking - Family Crest
Divination - Children of Mah
Dungeoneering - Salt in the Wound
Invention - Back to the Freezer, Death to the Dorgeshuun
Magic - Desert Treasure, Light Within, Lunar Diplomacy
Prayer - Light Within, Ghosts Ahoy, Temple at Senntisten
Ranged - Animal Magnetism
Runecrafting - Hero's Welcome, Lunar Diplomacy, Mourning's End Part II, 'Phite Club
Slayer - Smoking Kills
Smithing - Family Crest
Thieving - Buyers and Cellars

Other quests that unlock important stuff:

Daily $$$ - As a First Resort

Additional Teleports/Transportation - Branches of Darkmeyer, Eadgar's Ruse, Eagle's Peak, Enlightened Journey, Evil Dave's Big Day Out, Eyes of Glouphrie, A Fairy Tale II - Cure a Queen, Ghosts Ahoy, Giant Dwarf, Grand Tree, Jack of Spades, Love Story, Mighty Fall, Missing, Presumed Death, Path of Glouphrie, Plague City, Plague's End, Prisoner of Glouphrie, Shilo Village, Tree Gnome Village, Troll Stronghold, Watchtower, The World Wakes

QoL Improvements - Deadliest Catch, Dealing with Scabaras, Desperate Times, A Fairy Tale III - Battle at Ork's Rift, Fate of the Gods, Garden of Tranquility, Legends' Quest, Nomad's Elegy, One Small Favour, Sliske's Endgame, The World Wakes

Recurring XP - Back to my Roots, Fur 'n Seek, Hunt for Red Raktuber, In Pyre Need, Mighty Fall, Shadow over Ashdale, Tears of Guthix, What Lies Below

Endgame Gear - Broken Home, The Dig Site, Merlin's Crystal, One Piercing Note, Shadow of the Storm, The World Wakes


IT HAS BEEN BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THAT YOU SHOULD ALL BE LISTENING TO THIS SICK BEAT: https://soundcloud.com/runescapesou...for-nourishment




This space reserved for: GOON SHITPOST CONTENT - Send me your best chat logs, gifs, and other assorted Runescape Media.

Toshimo fucked around with this message at 03:06 on Dec 16, 2020

Swicky
Dec 29, 2013

DAY MAN
AHH AHH AHHHHHHH
FIGHTER OF THE NIGHT MAN
AHH AHH AHHHHHHH
He's a master of karate and friendship, for everyone


No weebs allowed

Simsmagic
Aug 3, 2011

im beautiful





I like to click things and watch numbers go up and I hope you will too

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012



posting itt for an invite for Ya0ifangurl tia in advance

Revolucion
Nov 2, 2004


.

Revolucion fucked around with this message at 10:36 on Nov 29, 2020

TheJanitor
Apr 17, 2007
Ask me about being the strongest janitor since Roger Wilco

Already in the clan however i promise thejanitor#3614 is not a discord bot

Roar
Jul 7, 2007

I got 30 points!

I GOT 30 POINTS!


I, a nerd, joined the nerd discord as roarr.

Sab Sabbington
Sep 18, 2016

In my restless dreams I see that town...

Flagstaff, Arizona


Toshimo I haven't played in a while but this is a good OP and your favorite vegan bird roleplayer sends love.

If you haven't played RS3 it is a legit good MMO with a legit great story and yes, I'm just as mad about that as you are.

edit:

Simsmagic posted:

I like to click things and watch numbers go up and I hope you will too

I'm glad we can't escape more Zanik being thrust unwillingly into our lives even when we don't play atm

Sab Sabbington fucked around with this message at 21:35 on Nov 30, 2020

The Shortest Path
Jun 21, 2012

Peace was never an option.




I am not currently playing this game because I'm neck deep in other timesinks, but RS is fun and cool and good.

Sab Sabbington
Sep 18, 2016

In my restless dreams I see that town...

Flagstaff, Arizona


Sab Sabbington posted:

If you haven't played RS3 it is a legit good MMO with a legit great story and yes, I'm just as mad about that as you are.

oh also the bird god is a legit radical antifascist who's here to gently caress poo poo UP in the name of JUSTICE and if you don't think that's the raddest poo poo you can get out of my face

RS3 also got rid of a bunch of the racism if that matters to you (it should)

Malpais Legate
Oct 1, 2014



Sab Sabbington posted:

oh also the bird god is a legit radical antifascist who's here to gently caress poo poo UP in the name of JUSTICE and if you don't think that's the raddest poo poo you can get out of my face

RS3 also got rid of a bunch of the racism if that matters to you (it should)

He's a radical antifascist and gay af

We stan one (1) sick rear end bird god.

Themata
Dec 10, 2011

If you want a pizza this pie
You can crust that
I won't cheese on you
Dance on the groove flour
And I'll give you a disco-unt


Sab Sabbington posted:

oh also the bird god is a legit radical antifascist who's here to gently caress poo poo UP in the name of JUSTICE and if you don't think that's the raddest poo poo you can get out of my face

RS3 also got rid of a bunch of the racism if that matters to you (it should)

They finally got rid of Xuan and his horrible 'Asian' voice acting?

Sab Sabbington
Sep 18, 2016

In my restless dreams I see that town...

Flagstaff, Arizona


Themata posted:

They finally got rid of Xuan and his horrible 'Asian' voice acting?

Oh, nah, just the Al-Kharid and gross jungle-related stuff.

Holyshoot
May 5, 2010


Simsmagic posted:

I like to click things and watch numbers go up and I hope you will too

Soup du Jour
Sep 8, 2011

I always knew I'd die with a headache.



I love my idiot incel god Zaros and you will too

Hooplah
Jul 15, 2006


fuck money
smoke bitches
get trees


where the gently caress is the slayer tag for the thread

Psychedelicatessen
Feb 17, 2012


I currently don't have access to my large pile of old RS trash for the shitposting part of the OP, but here's some of the stuff I could find:

Look up your username on this youtube channel.

Ex-Jmod on the development of Desert Treasure




LiberalExtinction
Aug 4, 2009



I'm here for the jorts.

Comrade Marx#0914 / HajjPodge ingame

space jerk
Oct 15, 2010

Ignore this terrible drug.


Edit: Thanks

Eox
Jun 20, 2010

sometimes the gap i want to close is my entire hp bar




It's really important to me that everybody reads this one.

The Shortest Path
Jun 21, 2012

Peace was never an option.




Run, Escape!

Soup du Jour
Sep 8, 2011

I always knew I'd die with a headache.



Eox posted:

It's really important to me that everybody reads this one.

allah allah ackbar zamorak

Samuel L. Hacksaw
Mar 25, 2007

Never Stop Posting.



Lmao that a runescape intern went to Frontier. Makes sense.

Hooplah
Jul 15, 2006


fuck money
smoke bitches
get trees


That mod saying miscellania was overbalanced into uselessness is ironman erasure

Goast
Jul 23, 2011


no ones cares about ironman except the nerds that do it why would the devs be different

PriNGLeS
Feb 17, 2004
ONCE YOU POP THE FUN DONT STOP

I downloaded RS3 on steam and played for about 15 minutes, then went afk for probably 20 came back with an image burnt into my monitor from the login screen.

It went away after several hours, but it's very cool that a videogame can potentially cause permanent damage to hardware.

Internet Kraken
Apr 24, 2010

slightly amused


For some reason I decided to play OSRS again and now I'm hopelessly sucked down the rabbit hole of this stupid game.

Numbers go up.

Hooplah posted:

That mod saying miscellania was overbalanced into uselessness is ironman erasure

Playing ironman will lead you to appreciate many aspects of the game that could be ignored if you just spent a handful of gold at the GE

I spent like 3 hours temple trekking just to get watermelon seeds

Internet Kraken fucked around with this message at 05:47 on Dec 2, 2020

Hyedum
Jun 12, 2010


I, for one, appreciate our new zanik overlords

Stephen9001
Oct 28, 2013


Huh, new thread. May as well bookmark it.

Game is... sometimes good. They need to go back to doing more quests.

I can have moments of... eccentricity and sometimes be quite curious about things. Please forgive me if I do something foolish or rude.

Holyshoot
May 5, 2010


PriNGLeS posted:

I downloaded RS3 on steam and played for about 15 minutes, then went afk for probably 20 came back with an image burnt into my monitor from the login screen.

It went away after several hours, but it's very cool that a videogame can potentially cause permanent damage to hardware.

You should probably upgrade from an early 2000s plasma tv as your computer monitor. Lmao.

Goast
Jul 23, 2011


how the gently caress do you get screen burn after 20 minutes

Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

Must be fuckin' nice!


Goast posted:

how the gently caress do you get screen burn after 20 minutes

Basically this, but with your plasma TV:

Eox
Jun 20, 2010

sometimes the gap i want to close is my entire hp bar



thank god runescape itself doesn't involve looking at the same thing for upwards of 20 minutes

Samuel L. Hacksaw
Mar 25, 2007

Never Stop Posting.



Fashionscape is alive and well.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Sab Sabbington
Sep 18, 2016

In my restless dreams I see that town...

Flagstaff, Arizona


Eox posted:

thank god runescape itself doesn't involve looking at the same thing for upwards of 20 minutes

just run the Anachronia agility route until you hit 200m exp then quit the game. No screen burn AND you get to feel empty when everyone reflexively congratulates you on your achievement.

Frekkie Melody
Feb 8, 2020



These screenshots are confusing me. Wasn't Runescape the Richard Garriot RPG that looked like Dink Smallwood?

The Shortest Path
Jun 21, 2012

Peace was never an option.




That's a heck of a good banner ad. So many of them on SA nowadays, it's really nice.

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a sawing motion
May 15, 2009


Carly Rae Jetson (ZordonRamsay) reporting for Discord duty

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