- SweetWillyRollbar
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Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass? 
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It seems there is a special stormtrooper unit for every possible terrain, job, etc. in Star Wars. Mudtroopers, shoretroopers, sandtroopes, snowtroopers, executioner trooper, the list goes on! But what if this is just scratching the surface? Clearly there are other jobs that need to be done in the empire that haven't been made into some kind of unit to be shown on screen and be made into action figures (not dolls!) to sell to the kids! Help Disney out here!
Accountanttrooper: Works within the empire's massive accounting department to help finances in the empire run smoothly. Their armor is either tan, beige, dark brown, or black, depending on rank (unless it is business casual Friday, in which case there is an Hawaiian shirt variant). They wear an open-faced helmet with an optional glasses attachment. Their armor includes a front pocket with a plastic lining where these troopers hold their vibro-pens. They have a com device attached to their wrists that is linked to a microphone and speakers built into their helmet.
SweetWillyRollbar fucked around with this message at 13:59 on Nov 29, 2020
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Nov 26, 2020 09:32
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jan 18, 2021 15:08
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped.
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Daycare Trooper: Being on the front lines of the Empire's defence can really conflict with the responsibilities of parenthood. For this reason every battalion has a dedicated team taking care of and entertaining the little ones. Recruitment is based on top score at the firing range, on the perplexing presumption that the best marksmen will also keep an eagle-eyed watch over their charges. This process has been blamed for the poor performance remaining combat troops have exhibited in the past.
Meme Trooper: For various reasons these conscripts passed neither the physical requirements of combat roles nor the security clearance requirements of the higher level cybersecurity teams. Instead they are tasked with posting on message boards under pseudonyms, talking endlessly about how sweet the emperor is and how everyone should support him. Originally without uniform, Grand Moff Blaskin ordered that they wear full armour at work in an attempt to improve morale.
D.A.R.E. Trooper: Charged with infiltrating combat units and routing out fellow troopers who partake in illicit recreation, many serve as punishment for themselves being caught with contraband. As they are both snitches and seemingly hypocrites, they are considered the lowest of all troopers. Even penal unit sewage tank janitor troopers will not knowingly associate with a D.A.R.E. trooper.
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Nov 26, 2020 23:21
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- Heather Papps
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this one loving trooper trooper won't stop playing iron maiden over the death star pa and i am going to blow this battle station up if he doesn't stop
 https://giant.gfycat.com/GloomyThre...canwilddog.webm
a 2020 vanisher original, paired with my khanstant lord - a byob classic!
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Nov 26, 2020 23:26
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- take the moon
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by Fluffdaddy
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the jetpack guys from dark forces
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 27, 2020 01:06
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- take the moon
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by Fluffdaddy
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pizza delivery trooper: who placed an order to the exact other side of the death star already its not funny
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 27, 2020 01:08
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- take the moon
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by Fluffdaddy
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matrix troopers: used as batteries for the empires advanced industrial machine. believe theyre rebels fighting an evil space empire with their jedi friends
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 27, 2020 01:10
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped.
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Meal Troopers: Fattened and enclosed in cages aboard flagships; kept on the off chance there will be a diplomatic meeting or cultural event with a race that appreciates the taste of humanoid flesh.
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Nov 27, 2020 01:40
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- FutonForensic
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Midwife Trooper: Helps in the delivery of Baby Stormtroopers birthed prematurely by Pregnant Stormtroopers under the stress of combat
by Khanstant
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Nov 27, 2020 02:09
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- Khanstant
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The Goof Troopers: the force you send when you need gags and giggles
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Nov 27, 2020 04:42
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- Halloween Liker
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Simon Trooper from electronics department at local college
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Nov 27, 2020 08:41
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- Nosfereefer
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at the stormtrooper academy, certain go-getting individuals with a real "can do" attitude get separated from the chaff and moved to a special class for an elite unit. they're commonly known as real troopers
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Nov 27, 2020 17:24
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- Nosfereefer
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storm troopers are rarely seen in storms which is bullshit
thats just because they're so efficient
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Nov 27, 2020 22:27
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- Nosfereefer
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"oh no there isn't garbage everywhere! the bin men are useless!"
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Nov 27, 2020 22:28
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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Nostalgia Trooper keeps insisting that music and holovids were better in the decade BBY. He's not wrong, but everyone still wishes he would shut up about it.
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Nov 27, 2020 22:31
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jan 18, 2021 15:08
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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There's a K9 unit that all have dogs but they aren't for combat or anything they're just for being chill dog pals.
Also dogs aren't called canines in star wars so they don't get the pun on the name.
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Nov 28, 2020 21:44
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Nov 26, 2020 09:32
