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Stoner Sloth



"Help I am being held prisoner in a fortune cookie factory... sorry I made that up for attention... just work is so boring. Sigh."

"youre born surrounded by strangers and strange fluid and you die from strangers drowning you with strange fluid" (thanks Khanstant for inspiring this thread)

please post weird cookie fortunes thanks!

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Sid Vicious



Khanstant





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biosterous








blank with transparent bg



thank you heather papps for this sig!!!

biosterous








thank you heather papps for this sig!!!

Khanstant



Prof. Crocodile




thank you khanstant for the sigoblin! thanks to Sid Vicious for my early yobmas present! thank you khanstant for the sigoblin!

Horrible Butts


Horrible Butts fucked around with this message at 23:29 on Nov 28, 2020

https://giant.gfycat.com/sillyremorsefuldipper.webm
Thank you Prof. Crocodile for the fun festive winter sig!
Arcane gob born of Khanstant's goblin gumball machine!

Sid Vicious



Horrible Butts


https://giant.gfycat.com/sillyremorsefuldipper.webm
Thank you Prof. Crocodile for the fun festive winter sig!
Arcane gob born of Khanstant's goblin gumball machine!

Stoner Sloth



'Goons Are Great will drink the whiteclaw (equivalent)'

'ButtTheShitmanFart WILL post in BYOB'

e: if someone with talent wants to make these they are most welcome!



sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut and Heather Papps!!- ty friends!

SweetWillyRollbar

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


So like...you free later on? I need help moving a couch.

biosterous








thank you heather papps for this sig!!!

Sid Vicious




lmao

Khanstant



Slush Garbo

Corbin Bernsen eat your heart out


plant this seed in the light of a full moon before the first freeze

Slush Garbo

Corbin Bernsen eat your heart out


the waiters phone number

Slush Garbo

Corbin Bernsen eat your heart out


rolling paper and some ground up nug

Slush Garbo

Corbin Bernsen eat your heart out


no1 cURR YOLO lolololol

Stoner Sloth





sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut and Heather Papps!!- ty friends!

Entropic

patriarchy sucks


SweetWillyRollbar

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


Look to your left and then to your right, and three years from now, only one of you will still be here.

DOPE FIEND KILLA G



opening the fortune cookie and i pull out a really long piece of paper with the lyrics to limp bizkits break stuff


<--sid made this one!

aldantefax

ALWAYS BE MECHFISHIN'

"Your lucky numbers were here, but a time traveler has taken them and won the lottery and promptly have themselves amnesia in their ecstasy of doing so."

Twenty Four





read the thread title and came in to post this, lol.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m22L1XllRg#t=63s

"everyone is better then you... in bed"

"you are often asked if it is in yet... in bed"

"it's just a picture of a hand giving thumbs down" "oh turn it upside down and it's a thumbs up!" "no..." (picture has "this side down" printed on it)

lol that show was sooooo good, probably my favorite sketch comedy series ever.

Prof. Crocodile



Twenty Four posted:

read the thread title and came in to post this, lol.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m22L1XllRg#t=63s

"everyone is better then you... in bed"

"you are often asked if it is in yet... in bed"

"it's just a picture of a hand giving thumbs down" "oh turn it upside down and it's a thumbs up!" "no..." (picture has "this side down" printed on it)

lol that show was sooooo good, probably my favorite sketch comedy series ever.


thank you khanstant for the sigoblin! thanks to Sid Vicious for my early yobmas present! thank you khanstant for the sigoblin!

pecan



Pot Smoke Phoenix

Smoke 'em if you got 'em!





Sig elements by Khanstant & CoG

Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

Khanstant



Slush Garbo

Corbin Bernsen eat your heart out


excellent. the lucky number printed on the back of this fortune cookie does not fit the normal lotto sequence. "i'll have to buy smoobles a mojito next time we're in peru" i think to myself, appreciating their deft work in infiltrating the restaurant to place this cookie. pulling the paper taut, i see the expected launch code pattern. 5 digits, repeated 4 times: 69420 69420 42069 69420. as I tuck the fortune into my jacket, i whisper "lol, nice."

Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.


Welcome to your math final exam. The next two cookies you eat will contain vectors. Find their dot product.

Robot Made of Meat



Fortunes that ruin the game.

You are good at having sex . . . in bed.
Your partner likes sharing time with you . . . in bed.
You will get a good, satisfying night's sleep . . . in bed.


Thanks to Manifisto for the sig!

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Khanstant



youre born surrounded by strangers and strange fluid in bed and you die from strangers drowning you with strange fluid... in bed

hmm maybe the bed was always implied in this one

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