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Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Big milestones in the first 500 with 69 and 420 but after that youíre struggling and the goons will need to have an iron will to succeed

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Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



No posts for 2 hours? This is like going for a walk but just sitting down for hours at a time.

Weird.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Stoatbringer posted:

I'm here for the first ever 1000 page thread!



You couldnít have put all of these gifs in different posts?????

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



MakaVillian posted:

And also this



Mm yeah thatís the way I like my gifs baby. A three course meal

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Sitting Here posted:

why the gently caress do fingernails grow so fast, like I i swear to god I just cut you you little shits don't be giving me attitude when i go to scratch my rear end

Just lol if you arenít anxiously biting them to stumps every day

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Iím having some doubts about this thread

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Brutal. Merry slumpmas goons

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



14 - a cursed number best known for being the bomber of words in that Nazi slogan. Let us post hard, gentlegoons, so that we may leave this forsaken page.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Jakabite posted:

14 - a cursed number best known for being the number of words in that Nazi slogan. Let us post hard, gentlegoons, so that we may leave this forsaken page.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Post isnít edit but in this case, Iím glad.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



DeadFatDuckFat posted:

The "main" character Holden is definitely like that. I think he stands out as the most egregious because his character just isn't that interesting or even fun to watch like his crewmates are. Just straight laced serious goody two shoes captain guy

To be fair he becomes quite fun for how much of a doe eyed, affable dumb dumb he is.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Yeah itís kind of the point of him. Heís an idiotic idealist whoís terrible at politics and genuinely does just stumble out of the right end of things on sheer dumb luck, the fact heís got amazing people around him, and a few other factors that would be spoilers. Heís also the only character whoís uncompromisingly trying to do Ďthe right thingí though - heís the moral core of the crew with all the issues thatís obviously going to bring up (dragging people into suicide missions because he just has to be a good person, etc.)

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Tip posted:

I got 2 sets of sheets, one from my sister and one from my mother.

My mom was poo poo talking the sheets my sister gave me, she was like, "Only 600 threads? I got you 1800 thread count."

Now I'm laughing because I googled about thread counts and anything above 1000 is just a total fabrication.

FABRICation haha

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



gary oldmans diary posted:

thats not how i remember it

Leto editing his own page

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



I know a guy who takes off all of his clothes every time he shits and wipes towards his balls through his legs. Like even in a nightclub, everything off. Festival portaloo? All off. At dinner with a friends parents at their house? Naked as the day he was born, dropping the kids off at the pool. What are goonsí opinions on this

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



DeadFatDuckFat posted:

So he hangs up his clothes somewhere? What if theres no hook, does he just put his clothes on the gross public restroom floor?

If thereís a hook they go on the hook. Otherwise theyíre going on the floor or another surface.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Hey now if it was me Iíd own up to it - Iíll happily tell you about my wiping techniques if you like.

More poo poo stories. I was once on holiday with a few friends and we were staying in a youth hostel. Luckily the dorms were 4 bed and there were 4 of us so it was like we had a cheap decent hotel room. Anyway one of my friends, weíll call him Mike, gets up from bed in just his white underwear one morning. As heís walking to the bathroom we all notice a huge brown stain on his rear end. Well maybe not huge but like, noticeable and obviously not just general nastiness from not changing or something gross.

Mike: oh yeah well you know how it is when you go for a poo poo in the middle of the night.

What?

Mike: you know when youíre tired and just canít really be bothered to wipe properly so you just leave it after youíve got the worst.

No, Mike soon found out, none of us did Ďknowí, and he was roundly ridiculed for the rest of the trip for having a dirty arse. Seriously if I donít get every last bit my hole itches like a motherfucker, I canít imagine deliberately just leaving poo poo on my rear end.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Prof. Crocodile posted:

Only 15 pages in and this thread has gone to poo poo.

Going to poo poo is actually the opposite of going to poo poo. Makes you think

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



POSTIN POSTIN POSTIN POSTIN WHAAAAT

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



I SAID OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IM BLINDED BY THE POOOOSTS

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Floodixor posted:

Hey I've always wrestled with the phrase "truth to power" like grammatically, the function of the words always bugs me, the overall proper word usage. Like... I can't even explain why it causes me confusion. Am I alone here?

Maybe you feel it should be Ďthe truth to powerí?

Also since the announcement about page 47 we should probably start preparing. Iím going to go and buy a vat of plastic cheese

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Letís all predict when the thread will be finished. Iím going to say May 2023.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



fat bossy gerbil posted:

At the rate weíre going this thread wonít be done for about five years. Hurry up and post you fuckers!

I support this sentiment strongly

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Tip posted:

It could be done tomorrow if people would

We just need goons to actually care. I feel like so few of us care about the success of the thread and that really upsets me tbh

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Into The Mild posted:

Are we there yet??

No. This journey has barely begun. What lies before us is a bumpy road, I admit, but if you come on this journey with us and post like you've never posted before, post with vigour and zeal, post like the great posters of yore, we will get there and we will feast in the halls of Valhalla, our names etched into the runestones of posting history.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



cnut posted:

Pooping is my destiny


Finishing this thread is your destiny. Pooping is a means to this end.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Wait until I tell you guys about a site called pornhub.com

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Tip posted:

Poophub.com

Pooptub.girl

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Stoatbringer posted:

Play Poop Bingo and try to get them all in one day.

Are you allowed multiple types in the same poopsesh?

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



The rate of posting is accelerating, I can feel the energy building like a mountain of poo poo in my lower bowel, ready to burst forth in a wave posts at any moment, propelling this thread to the stars.

Anyway I just had to use 4 squares of paper to wipe. Wasted the first on a 2x fold and used the rest at 2x fold then 3x fold til the last one which is also used at 4x and 5x. Then I took a gamble and put some water on my hand and wiped with that. Clean as a god drat whistle. drat Iím good.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Brownie looks good. No to bidet as I do not like my anus being wet!!

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Tip posted:

I hope this isn't a firm rule, gotta wash that rear end.

If my whole body is wet Iím fine with it of course. My rear end gets washed at least once per day and I am a very thorough wiper generally.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Tip posted:

A message to any television or film directors reading this thread: I don't need to see close-ups of surgeries or even needles going into people's skin. I totally get what's happening without it.

A contradictory message: without these scenes I find it IMPOSSIBLE to masturbate.

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



30 new posts since I last checked upon you all. You call that posting?

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



This

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Is

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



POSTINF

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Line those babies up

Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Mmm one more page. I can feel it. That sweet sweet page 20

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Jakabite
Jul 31, 2010

How shall we fuck off, O Lord?



Itís a brutal indictment of the world that and the people who live in it that The Expanse will never reach the popularity of Game of Thrones

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