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Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Six pages in and no goatse, krusty, or fiesta cat? You might just make this happen, op.

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Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

Should have made this the reverse thread. Weíd be done already.

Hindsight is 20/20.

Or foresight I guess?

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Sometimes i get like a really focused, really intense headache in the side of my head, just for a couple of seconds. By the time I'm aware that it's happening, it's already over.

It only happens maybe once a year, tops, and it always freaks me out a little bit.

What I'm saying is that I'm worried I may be dead before this thread reaches 1,000 pages.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Chomp8645 posted:

I created a 3D donut today folks. This is my donut. I hope you like it.





It's part of the (apparently) infamous "donut" Blender tutorial. So I did it under instruction, but it was from scratch, no downloaded material. I'm not sure if I want to go straight on the next part which adds sprinkles and texture definition to the bread part (it looks like unbaked dough right now), or make something simple of my own first.

If you want to get all up in blender there is a thread about in BYOB where a few excellent/professional artists mess around--and some interested amateurs as well: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3888016&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=14

Normally I would PM this sort of thing, but we're trying to get to 1,000 pages here so every post counts I guess.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

StrixNebulosa posted:

Due to super stress from my online college being the worst, I have gone mad and am looking for lots of murder

It was all there in the av the whole time. Shoulda seen it coming.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



This thread has really lost steam. I don't even think it will make it to page 11, let along page 1,000.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

Nice!

I just got a brand new 3d printer and it came in dozens of pieces with worse than Ikea instructions. I spent 2 hours assembling the thing, and then a few hours trying to print something.

Behold what I have accomplished:




Donít despair friend. I think itís a lovely donut.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Chomp8645 posted:

Update: the spoon is now sufficiently shiny and spoon-like. The spoon was not part of the tutorial outside the generic instruction "your homework is to make a utensil for the scene". This spoon represents a great victory on my path to artistic discovery.



This is really good Chomp. Especially the droplets and reflection on the cup.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Doc Fission posted:

I will be back for page 69.

A quick calculation says that this should happen in late February 2021.

We are on pace to reach our 1,000 page goal in early 2024.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Jakabite posted:

Hey now if it was me Iíd own up to it - Iíll happily tell you about my wiping techniques if you like.

More poo poo stories. I was once on holiday with a few friends and we were staying in a youth hostel. Luckily the dorms were 4 bed and there were 4 of us so it was like we had a cheap decent hotel room. Anyway one of my friends, weíll call him Mike, gets up from bed in just his white underwear one morning. As heís walking to the bathroom we all notice a huge brown stain on his rear end. Well maybe not huge but like, noticeable and obviously not just general nastiness from not changing or something gross.

Mike: oh yeah well you know how it is when you go for a poo poo in the middle of the night.

What?

Mike: you know when youíre tired and just canít really be bothered to wipe properly so you just leave it after youíve got the worst.

No, Mike soon found out, none of us did Ďknowí, and he was roundly ridiculed for the rest of the trip for having a dirty arse. Seriously if I donít get every last bit my hole itches like a motherfucker, I canít imagine deliberately just leaving poo poo on my rear end.

Only 15 pages in and this thread has gone to poo poo.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

All my muscles are going to be jello tomorrow.

Wow that must have been some poo poo.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



When the historians look back on this thread after 1,000 pages, what will they think about this string of poop-related posts from pages 15-18? Will it be a high point, a low point, or just a phase?

Time will tell, I guess.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



DeadFatDuckFat posted:

Lol omg



"The show's opening montage also shows him using his genitals to keep a lion away from a group of children."


Sure it's easy for us to look back now and say that it was a bad decision to spend several months and many thousands of dollars making a children's television show about a giant claymation penis. But hindsight is always 20/20.

Let's try to be sympathetic to the dozen or so Danish TV executives and producers who greenlit, made, and aired this show. Can any of us really, honestly, say that we would have done things differently in their place?

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



fat bossy gerbil posted:

I just played a video game for the first time in ages and I just have to say I loving hate video games. Iíve poured thousands and thousands of hours into them over the years and now I just feel bad that I ever wasted my time on this trash at all.

If you talk to serious car people, they will tell you that all cars are pieces of poo poo. I think this is because our expectations of cars have gotten consistently higher over the years, while at the same time the economics of making cars has driven quality down.

The same thing happened with video games--they peaked with Def Jam Vendetta and it's been all downhill from there.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



I am the 1% 2%.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Hey everybody at times like this, I think it's important to remember the Pope's Lamborghini, which he donated to charity because he lives in downtown Rome and it's hard enough to get a Vespa through those streets, let alone a Huracan.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



I went up into the mountains in Costa Rica a couple of years ago and it was magnificent. Colors of green that we don't have in the US, and more beautiful birds than you can imagine. I didn't see many monkeys, but I did drink ayahuasca, so I guess it balances out.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Hey I'm not a fan of the Catholic Church either, but you can't argue with a sick-rear end Lambo.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



You can tell that I am a serious automotive enthusiast and a chick magnet because I referred to a Lamborghini as a 'Lambo.'

This is an advanced move, and it's not something I would recommend to just anyone.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

Ok boomer, cool kids call it a 'ghini now.

Much as this hurts, it's a good opportunity to use one of my favorite new smilies

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Jakabite posted:

I thought anime was pronounced aneem til I was about 14

Heh heh. How ridiculous. We all know how itís really pronounced though. *tugs collar*

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

Back to poop talk: I'm buying a bidet

You can get a well reviewed bidet for like $15 on Amazon but I'm gonna go all out and buy one for $19.

I've never even used a bidet before, I feel kinda weird about it.

Friend I would advise you to go all in and buy a Tushy brand bidet. Itís worth the extra costóif only for the aggressively on brand spam they send you.

These people care more about poop than Iíve ever cared about anything.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

I looked at the Tushy but it doesn't seem to really offer anything over this $19 bidet:
https://www.amazon.com/Attachment-U...11&s=hi&sr=1-16

Moen is a reputable brand. I would let them clean my b-hole.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

Well I trust my b-hole to UFFU.

Aw thank you. I trust my b-hole to UFFU, too.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Also, here are some the aggressively on-brand emails that Tushy sends its customers. Their commitment to discussing fecal matters is staggering, even the context of this thread.



Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



yikes! posted:

howdy yíall

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



DeadFatDuckFat posted:

Huh. Never knew there was a emote

This was part of the ongoing BYOB smilie charity drive.

I think my favorite so far is

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

With this post I am 51 posts away from my 10,000th post

If you time this out juuuuuuuust right you can snype page 1,000.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Jakabite posted:

I basically never vote on threads. am i weird

I use the standard "customer service survey" approach, and only vote '5' on threads I absolutely ove or '1' on threads I absolutely hate.

Actually I don't think I've ever voted '1' on any thread. Maybe that one Daikloktos thread. You know the one...

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Beffica posted:

In the dump. I made this gang tag as a goof and that derailed the thread and the mods want to start off fresh with clear posting rules


That sounds like a wise move. That thread was great when it was about WTF and NMS art, but then it just became a dump for unironic furry porn.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020




Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Beffica posted:

Somebody suggested an Ask/Tell thread for artist talk, if we really need to segregate "weird art" posts from "starving artists talking about doing porn to survive" posts. The thread was fine with the two mixing IMO, especially when it lead to situations like when I posted something really weird with a million kinks for a forums upgrade certificate contest and somebody was like "oh, I actually know that guy, I didn't know he was into all that". I have full faith the mods will figure everything out.

I think itís all about a clear purpose for a thread. A ďbad deviant art threadĒ is the right home for excessively daring kink art, especially if itís poorly done or existentially disturbing. Horny comments about said artóbe they ironic or sincereóare good because they enrich the dialogue.

But then people started overwhelming the thread with professional quality spank material for vanilla kink (furry, leather, cosplay, etc.). And that gives the larger audience nothing to learn about or talk about or laugh about. So the thread just became a porn dump.

Chomp got a lot of heat in that thread, but his centipede waifu posts are a great example of the sort of kink that results in active discussion amongst the many, as opposed to active tugging amongst the few.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Internetjack posted:

Pretty sure he checked his receipt and confirmed he was charged full price. I think it was a post early in the corona thread, and people kept posting requests for updates on the ducks. Did you return them, call the store, eat them? I don't think there was ever a followup post.

All that delicious greasy duck fat probably made his fingers to slippy to post.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



gary oldmans diary posted:

they really are. all the videos are pretty much about the results of people making very obviously bad choices but theyre still such easy things to do
if i recall one of them is about the guy who boiled his brains in his bitcoin mining bedroom

Wait until you get to the episode about the guy who eats a huge gross burrito as part of some online stunt. OMG what a debacle.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



I prefer Radiator Charlieís Mortgage Lifter tomatoes. Theyíre not super easy to grow but man oh man are they tasty. Also, canít beat that name.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



I have heard from a VERY reputable source that pouring bleach directly into your lungs makes you pretty much immortal.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Meme Poker Party posted:

Me right now:








I will let you know how it goes, friends.

In all seriousness, I have friends and family in various roles in health care, and they all say that doctors have gotten a whole lot better at diagnosing and treating COVID over the past year or so.

I know a few people that caught it recently, and although they all said it sucked, they also all said that it wasnít nearly as scary as it seemed in March 2020. One dude I know didnít even miss a day of work, although he looked like rear end in Zoom for a week. YMMV.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



Tip posted:

Most cases are mild but you never know if that's gonna be you.

I'm young(ish) and had no preexisting conditions and really thought I'd be done with it in a couple weeks. I ended up missing 3 months of work and now I have asthma and ongoing exhaustion. The damage to my lungs might be permanent.

It's loving horrible, do whatever you can to avoid it.

Good luck Meme Poker Party.

Dang, that is rough. I wish you all the best, and I certainly wasn't intending to minimize COVID--just maybe toss a silver lining to Chomp. I mean, if nothing else he has a lamia doctor waifu in his corner.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



deep dish peat moss did this earlier today and it is awesome and I think it deserves a larger audience so I am xposting it here.

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Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020



DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

Yeah well Iím GLAD your chicken was overdone!

Whoa whoa whoa. Let's not say things we can't take back.

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