low-energy olympic sports

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PHIZ KALIFA: #mood

judges strip me of my Couch Biathelon medal after it's discovered that i hid additional ammo in betwixt the cushions

wearing my finest leopard print for the 50 meter strut

this year's triathelon is going to involve water wings for the swimming portion, and the cycle has an electric assist motor. sparkling water used in the Bong Waystations

# ? Dec 6, 2020 20:54

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# ? Apr 20, 2024 09:54

Twenty Four

sign me up for the nap-athon

# ? Dec 6, 2020 20:56

PHIZ KALIFA: #mood

Twenty Four posted:

sign me up for the nap-athon

i would but the sheet is at the far end of the table and there's a cat in my lap

crimes

# ? Dec 6, 2020 21:06

Prof. Crocodile

Hello yes. Here is my idea. Basically it is the luge except other people put you into it and push you and take you out of it. Also the luge itself doesn't go anywhere.

# ? Dec 6, 2020 21:38

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Looking forward to completely dominating in this year's Toyotathon category.

# ? Dec 6, 2020 22:18

FutonForensic

scandal and mayhem in the Side Sleeper category as crowd favorite Ferdinand Yurlitovich was outed for sleeping on his back with his hips twisted a lil bit

# ? Dec 7, 2020 00:23

Horrible Butts

Hiring a drifter to grind adderall into my rival's turkey sandwich.

https://giant.gfycat.com/sillyremorsefuldipper.webm
_{Thank you Prof. Crocodile for the fun festive winter sig!

Arcane gob born of Khanstant's goblin gumball machine!}

# ? Dec 7, 2020 01:49

Heather Papps: hello friend

archery was too hard: has been replaced with crosbowry

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 7, 2020 01:59

google THIS

Firing up the iRobot app for the curling competition

# ? Dec 7, 2020 02:14

Christoph

I'm going for the gold in the Making Toast Instead of Dinner event

Kief Richards posted:

Looking forward to completely dominating in this year's Toyotathon category.

Hahaha

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Dec 7, 2020 02:17

PHIZ KALIFA: #mood

in an ironic twist, curling remains totally unchanged.

crimes

# ? Dec 7, 2020 04:49

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

in an ironic twist, curling remains totally unchanged.

i went curling last year and it's brutal. we should add little chairs to slide on

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Dec 7, 2020 05:07

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

In 1998 I changed the entire face of competitive writhing with the invention of the "rat flat flop," and in 2022 I hope to change the game again by introducing slight pained groans and loud joint-cracking noises.

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Dec 7, 2020 05:55

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

meat-sweating

# ? Dec 7, 2020 06:07

Moo Cowabunga: [Office Worker.

bubble bathing

Platinum User Pot Smoke Phoenix!

VANISHER

HEATHER PAPPS

https://giant.gfycat.com/WellgroomedImperfectHaddock.webm the vanisher

# ? Dec 7, 2020 06:13

Twenty Four

Kief Richards posted:

Looking forward to completely dominating in this year's Toyotathon category.

lol

# ? Dec 7, 2020 06:49

Drink-Mix Man: You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Action figure skating

# ? Dec 7, 2020 08:09

more falafel please: forums poster

I've been sitting on chairs incorrectly and having sex with people of different genders my whole life so I feel like I've got a good shot at the bi-athlon

thanks Saoshyant and nesamdoom for the sigs!

# ? Dec 7, 2020 08:39

Escape From Noise

Speed napping. Is it real? Or just people blinking a lot?

# ? Dec 7, 2020 11:30

titties: They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra

men's freestyle figure 'bating

# ? Dec 7, 2020 13:46

titties: They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Action figure skating

# ? Dec 7, 2020 13:47

pecan

all the lugers at the bottom of the hill looking back up to the top after their warm up run: ykow what, I�m good

# ? Dec 7, 2020 13:48

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Planning on a sweep of the hill rolling category. My twin sister (who is a wheel of cheddar) and I have been training for this our whole lives.

# ? Dec 7, 2020 15:16

Escape From Noise

Getting ready to dominate in the competitive picnicing event. The judges think the ant poison is nothing but sugar packets...

# ? Dec 7, 2020 17:03

Jaguars!

Jaguars! steps up to receive the bronze medal for his floor routine. His forward flop with sprawling arms received a 1.3 for difficulty and a 9.7 for execution.

# ? Dec 7, 2020 20:24

snergle: A kind little mouse!

i prefer the low-energy X games for my lovely gen X attitude and edgy humor. Tony 2thumbs is the best finger skateboarder ever.

# ? Dec 7, 2020 20:53

Pissed Ape Sexist

Men's synchronized lumber gazing
Packing tape end-finding (gloved)
Chug NyQuil with five other dudes and you all lay down with a puppy and see who falls asleep last

# ? Dec 7, 2020 21:34

google THIS

Practicing doing absolutely nothing to prepare for the athlon

# ? Dec 7, 2020 22:22

Prof. Crocodile

google THIS posted:

Practicing doing absolutely nothing to prepare for the athlon

# ? Dec 8, 2020 00:40

Finger Prince

Hot tub endurance

# ? Dec 8, 2020 00:57

Pissed Ape Sexist

Freestyle cringe cummies emoji story duel

# ? Dec 8, 2020 01:27

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Testing positive for performance enhancing drugs in the Weed Smokeathon, I tap out in shame.

# ? Dec 8, 2020 01:31

Heather Papps: hello friend

i've been waiting for planking to come back into style!

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 8, 2020 01:39

Pigsfeet on Rye: I'm meat on the hoof

I'm going to compete in competitive cat-snuggling. My chief opponent is clearly a master of the sport.
https://i.imgur.com/5d5YAmo.mp4

# ? Dec 8, 2020 01:51

biosterous

google THIS posted:

Practicing doing absolutely nothing to prepare for the athlon

^{^{thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!}}
^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? Dec 8, 2020 01:54

Escape From Noise

Finger Prince posted:

Hot tub endurance

This only ends in tragedy.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Sauna_Championships

# ? Dec 8, 2020 04:36

google THIS

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

This only ends in tragedy.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Sauna_Championships

quote:

After the death of one finalist and near-death of another during the 2010 championship, the organizers announced that they would not hold another event.[2] This followed an announcement by prosecutors in March that the organizing committee would not be charged for negligence, as their investigation revealed that the contestant who died may have used painkillers and ointments that were forbidden by the organizers.[3]

Not only was there an international sauna competition but it was ruined by doping

# ? Dec 8, 2020 06:18

Pissed Ape Sexist

I'm the FORBIDDEN OINTMENTS

E: Jesus christ the sauna was 110C, after 6 minutes one guy convulsed and died while the other spent 6 weeks in a medically induced coma because of the burns and a "scorched respiratory system". Wtf Finland, don't ruin saunas for the rest of us, dial it back

# ? Dec 8, 2020 06:51

FutonForensic

high-casualty olympic soaks

# ? Dec 8, 2020 22:43

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# ? Apr 20, 2024 09:54

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Trying not to roll over on my titty and wake myself up during the finals for the 800 hour nap.

# ? Dec 8, 2020 22:45

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