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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
Just a choice of three preset dick sizes.

So glad I didn't pre-order. Enjoy your game where you don't get to run around cyber city with an anaconda swinging between your knees, suckers.

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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
I shall not be purchasing this game.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Is there a tuna can option in char creation or is it something you have to approach one of the games talented cybersurgeons about?

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Colonel Cancer posted:

Is there a tuna can option in char creation or is it something you have to approach one of the games talented cybersurgeons about?

According to my sources, you get a choice of "medium, large, or slightly larger." With no options for girth adjustment.

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

No but the game does arbitrarily gender you when you pick boy or girl voice.

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

i have to say from what i noticed it was two dick types (cut/uncut) and a size slider

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
So no chrome tuna can, twice as thick as it is long, with built in pneumatic flechette launcher? I shall be boycotting this awful game.

damn horror queefs
Oct 14, 2005

say hello
say hello to the man in the elevator

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

or no penis or a vagina but i def saw a dick size slider i felt threatened by

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013


yeah this

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

MOOBS! posted:

i have to say from what i noticed it was two dick types (cut/uncut) and a size slider

How far to the right does the slider go?

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007
since the functionality is in there at all there will obviously be dick slider mods within a week. pc gaming supremacy!

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
No dick slider but two foreskin sliders ;)

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

gimme the GOD drat candy posted:

since the functionality is in there at all there will obviously be dick slider mods within a week. pc gaming supremacy!

But what about the physics engine to make it swing realistically? If my character doesn't have a dong to at least mid thigh my immersion will be ruined.

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

meanwhile my LIFE PARTNER only has one choice of vulva but many many pubic hairstyles. as much as i feel disrespected by the penis slider that is NOT enough vulval representation

hemale in pain
Jun 5, 2010




Applewhite posted:

According to my sources, you get a choice of "medium, large, or slightly larger." With no options for girth adjustment.

No micro penis option? it's 2020!!

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

Applewhite posted:

How far to the right does the slider go?

big->huge->poland video game

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

MOOBS! posted:

big->huge->poland video game

I need screenshots

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

i will say i was super stoked about the fact that i could have small->default->big breasts w/my choice of nipple (also 3 sizes ending in pepperoni)

Extra Large Marge
Jan 21, 2004

Fun Shoe

MOOBS! posted:

i will say i was super stoked about the fact that i could have small->default->big breasts w/my choice of nipple (also 3 sizes ending in pepperoni)

No mortadella option? This game sounds stupid.

Prism Mirror Lens
Oct 9, 2012

~*"The most intelligent and meaning-rich film he could think of was Shaun of the Dead, I don't think either brain is going to absorb anything you post."*~




:chord:
why do they never put labia or ball size options in games

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

Applewhite posted:

I need screenshots

spoiler because i cant afford loving bans after buying this video game

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

wow i hosed that all up with the penis size

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth

Colonel Cancer posted:

No dick slider but two foreskin sliders ;)

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019




I'm still halfway through downloading the loving game. A bit baffled to learn there actually is dick and boob customization implemented, surely that time couldn't have been spent fixing the gazillion bugs instead?

Just kidding, I can't wait to be a rogue small-dick big-balled corpo underground comic book seller and max all my cholesterol stats.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

That owns :hai:

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

It's meaningless anyway because you can't see your reflection in anything but the mirror in your house lol. Put ray tracing on Psycho setting and still nope.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
*Marvels at he own cyberdick in own cybermirror in dirty cyberbathroom in an affordable cyberbasement apartment*

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth
Surely they're are ball sliders, though. There must be.

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

okay here is a proper big dick on the slider also with big boobs w/o nipples


may i just point out my personal problems with the fact you have to pick a "female" in order to alter breast (but not nipple) size?

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
In advanced age of 2077 you can just reroute your piss glands from your balls into you mouth

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

MOOBS! posted:

okay here is a proper big dick on the slider also with big boobs w/o nipples


may i just point out my personal problems with the fact you have to pick a "female" in order to alter breast (but not nipple) size?



Wtf that’s “big“????

Extra Large Marge
Jan 21, 2004

Fun Shoe
If you pick the largest size you can spin it around like a windmill and use it to deflect bullets.

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth

Applewhite posted:

Wtf that’s “big“????

They're a grower, not a shower

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth
You can't actually get erect in game tho so it's left to you're imagination

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

Applewhite posted:

Wtf that’s “big“????

so far i have found no augments for my penis or for the forskin which i left behind by sliding to penis # 2

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Wow talk about dystopian future... I have a huge dick and can't get erect

MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

Who What Now posted:

You can't actually get erect in game tho so it's left to you're imagination

listen you dont know how me or my character solve problems

hemale in pain
Jun 5, 2010




i cant wait to have big titties and a moderately sized penis in cyberpunk 2077

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MOOBS!
Dec 10, 2013

"no i swear you can get hard in my video game!" i scream after paying $60ea for two floppy dick simulation cd keys

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