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Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

jesus WEP posted:

the person who wrote that tweet 100% wakes up every morning and crosses off a new day on the calendar until resident evil village is released
Hey that's my thing :mad:

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Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus


https://twitter.com/FatimaCrabcakes/status/1384673862491598850?s=19

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

My next wedding is gonna be larger than my first but I'm not gonna go apeshit on anything other than my dress



Which I can prolly get for under a hundo

Unless we swap out the booze bar for molly and poppers 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Beepies: the Breakfast of Badpost Champions

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

I scored another block :j:

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Jonny 290 posted:

thats even better than me eating block from the senior editor of the atlantic, nice
The one I'm most proud of is



Next on the list was Neil DeGrasse Tyson but I just caught a probe for poo poo-talking Caitlyn fuckin Jenner

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

mediaphage posted:

that's basically a moral imperative though
Yeah and it wasn't even very spicy

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

duz posted:

im sure its an automated system seeing the word whore
Nah, I just got report-bombed and I've got strikes

Facebook, however, did jail me for jokingly calling someone a pig. AI is super cool

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

I'm suing :mad:

https://twitter.com/obviousplant_/status/1386739683841875968?s=19

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

https://twitter.com/80snewsscreens/status/1387909460094488579?s=19

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Cat Face Joe posted:

please please please stop calling everything sus
totes

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Sagebrush posted:

totes is fetch
:hai:

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus


https://twitter.com/FatimaCrabcakes/status/1397988100610027521?s=19

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

https://twitter.com/RobertPalacios2/status/1404978011926151173?s=19

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus


Clawkkake!

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

yeah that's how you do it

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

That's March of the Pigs, Nimens :colbert:

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Jim Silly-Balls posted:

why didn’t (rapper) drake eat more poo poo for skeeving on the girl from stranger things? she’s like 20 years younger than him
This is a good question

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Sagebrush posted:

until i was probably 25 i thought a pony was just a not-fully-grown horse. didn't realize they were a separate breed of horse that stays that size. my 10 year old cousin explained it to me like i was a dumbass (which i guess i was)
Was?

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

oh wait poo poo


hang on no I knew this, a small horse is a foal? Or a colt?
A foal is a babby horse. A colt is a young male horse, counterpart to the filly.

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

PokeJoe posted:

now a gelding? well you're gonna want to sit down for this one
Not too soon after it's happened, tho, and very gently

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus


Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Ur Getting Fatter posted:

i used cock because it sounded more like code please don’t put wangs in my mouth
more for me 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

no

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

mediaphage posted:

i would probably watch an olympic motor sports event
Same but watersports.

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Oh god, I just hope for all our sakes the Arby's waifu and the wendyboo never meet

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

How else are you supposed to know how long to leave the bleach on?

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

i keep it as a badge of an honorable, spotless anus
I salute you and your sparklingly clean anus o7

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

PokeJoe posted:

i sleep in a big toilet with steve jobs
:j:

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

President Beep posted:

i am. they’re literally illegal.

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

President Beep posted:

ted cruz, escaping the texas lab that hatched him
How dare you say such a thing about Daddy Halford :mad:

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

took me a sec but drat
Okay shed a little light

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Sagebrush posted:

there is a nursery rhyme called "the grand old duke of york" with that format. prince andrew is the duke of york, and it was just announced that he is being sued for heinous sex crimes, the sort of thing that might be redacted in a court document made public.

i also think it's a neat coincidence that another andrew of new york is also on the outs today because of heinous sex crimes. it's like poetry, it rhymes
aaah, molto grazie

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

rotor posted:

i'm like 102% sure that things like Area 51 aren't alien storage or supersecret jets or whatever, it's just where the air force dumps its toxic waste without having to tell anyone.
It's where they breed military-grade supertwinks

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

rotor posted:

dudes indeed rock
nah you guys mostly suck

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Sagebrush posted:

pretty sure it's not a girl
No way to be absolutely sure 😏

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Sagebrush posted:

That is indeed a neat story but I hate Twitter threads and I especially hate the specific way this guy wrote it so I will summarize
what else do you hate, gampy? Are you still mad we abandoned the gold standard?

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

rotor posted:

im gonna retire from software and become a cop and thats all I'll do until they fire me
I'm sure they'd look the other way on that if you just brutalize a minority every now and again

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Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Never got a robot handjob, eh? What are you, mormon?

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