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Every year we wait to see what people have been sticking in themselves because we are awful humans and humanity is a vile disease. The list is American holes, as you can see there is a lack of non US regional items such as Hockey sticks or Bowler hats. This list is cautionary and not a challenge. Anyway without further delay here is the list in order of descending orifice: Ear
Rubber Bands Several Hair Bands “Patient’s Siblings Put A Piece Of Paper In Patient’s Right Ear Trying To Show Him A Magic Trick” Lollipop Toy Sword “Takes Shower With Earplugs In Ears In Attempt To Prevent Water From Going In & Now Earplug Is Stuck In Left Ear” Bobby Pin Hairpin Hair Trimmer Attachment “Found A Bead And Placed It In His Ear So He Wouldn’t Lose It” Toy Dinosaur Tweezers Fiberglass “Car Was Rear-ended And He Hit His Head On The Back Of The Front Seat, C/O Headaches Since, Also Put A Piece Of Paper In His Right Ear 1 Month Ago” Tooth Comb Tooth Dog Tooth “Was Sleeping When Her 4 Yo Child Broke Wooden Tip Of A Paint Brush And Put It In Her Ear” Pen Cap Marker Tip Nail “Was Experiencing Pain In Ear So Rolled Up Pieces Of Paper To Put Inside It. Changed Them Out A Few Times When The Last One Became Stuck In Ear” Pearl Piece Of Wicker Clothes Hamper “Put A Crayon In Each Ear In School. Crayon Removed From Right Ear But Not From Left” Necklace Bracelet Receipt Clay “Had Earbuds In His Ears Under His Snowmobile Helmet Hit A Water Bar And His Helmet Pushed His Ear Buds Deep Into His Ear” Plastic Magic Wand Candle Wax Blue Slime “Placed Bbs In Ear Buds And Forgot There Were In There. Stuck The Ear Buds On And Now Has 2 Bbs Lodged In Ear” Soda Can Tab Plastic Spoon “Felt Like Something There. Burning Sensation, Flushed The Ear And A Worm Flushed Out” Airsoft Pellet, Piece Of Purple Crayon, Small Rock (All Same Patient Nose
Confetti Balloon Candy Wrapper Fake Diamond Flower Sunflower Seed Toy Car Tire Toy Lizard Tail Steel Nut Quite A Bit Of Tissue Paper Mini Flashlight Mini Bowling Pin Sponge Toy Carrot Bread Pom Pom Googly Eye Sister’s Hair 2 Batteries Peanut Throat
Metal Straw Plastic Fork Plastic Cup Plastic Jail Wristband Cat Toy Bib Piece Of Sock “A Bee Or A Wasp” Small Pool Ball Honey Tip Of Knife Metal Pipe Sewing Needle Electrical Tape Thermometer Glow Stick Small American Flag Penis
Tongue Ring Balloon String Of Magnetic Beads “Playing With Phone And Fell Asleep When He Woke Up His Stylus Was In His Uretha. Injury Occurred 4 Days Ago And Didn’t Seek Treatment” Pen Pencil Paintbrush “Metal Screw In His Urethra To Cause An Erection” Wire Hanger Lanyard “Has Had A Marble In His Penis For The Past 4 Years And Decided He Needs It Removed” Glue Vagina
Battery Pill Bottle Small Vibrator Large Vibrator Paper Clips “Patient Was Intoxicated 4 Months Ago Placed A Crumble Of Tin Foil Inside Vagina” Film Canister Part Of Slinky Eyebrow Pencil Screw Pen 3 Bags Of Meth Bullet Rock Bath Bomb Baby Shoe Rectum
Multiple Marbles Toothbrush Holder Crayon “Put A Pencil Up Rectum And Now Not Able To Sit” Nail Polish Bottle Shaving Gel Bottle Aerosol Container “Patient Reports Inserting A Deodorant Spray Can Inside His Rectum Last Night As He Was Constipated” “Shampoo Bottle In His Rectum That He Placed There Because He Thought He Was Constipated” Small Foam Football Stick Screwdriver In Anus, Handle Fell Off “Was Intoxicated & Is Uncertain If She Used Her Anal Beads Or Not, Cant Find Them @ Home […] None Found In Er Exam” Pipe Vibrator Ring “Vibrator Struck In Rectum. Vibrator Is Still On.” 5 Inch Dildo 6 Inch Dildo 7 Inch Dildo 10 Inch Dildo Apple Toy Shark Plastic Turtle Cat Toy Bell Baseball Newspaper Cologne Bottle Baby Oil Bottle Hand Lotion Bottle “Was Squatting In The Shower When He Got A Small Bottle Stuck In His Rectum” Remote Control Fork Water Bottle “3 Weeks Ago He Was Drunk And Put A Light Bulb Up His Rectum.” Pooparoos Toy Weeble Wobble Toy Writing Pen And Bottle Cap Foam Dart 6 Magic Markers Christmas Lights “Put Dildo Into Rectum 2 Days Ago & Was Performing Daily Activities With It In Place. When Riding Lawn Mower The Dildo Slid Inside Rectum Completely”
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Dec 28, 2020 09:32
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 02:29 |
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That's pretty impressive op! I'm proud of you.
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Dec 28, 2020 12:43
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For sale: baby shoe, stuck in vagina
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Dec 28, 2020 13:06
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Les Os posted:For sale: baby shoe, stuck in vagina You're supposed to wait until the baby comes out to put the shoes on.
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Dec 28, 2020 13:13
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I'm real constipated, I wonder if inserting a giant cork in my butt will do the trick 
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Dec 28, 2020 14:51
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super sweet best pal posted:You're supposed to wait until the baby comes out to put the shoes on. 
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Dec 28, 2020 15:09
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there was a penis in your mom's vagina last year (mine) op
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Dec 28, 2020 15:24
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drat near killed 'em
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Dec 28, 2020 16:49
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SoylentCola posted:Rectum
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Dec 28, 2020 17:22
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quote:“Has Had A Marble In His Penis For The Past 4 Years And Decided He Needs It Removed” I'm glad this guy is finally taking steps to improve his life 
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Dec 28, 2020 20:34
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SoylentCola posted:Rectum every year there are fewer and fewer people who feel compelled to hide their anal play with some kind of nonsensical story about how they accidentally sat down on something. which is good for societal hangups and all but also bad because those are the funniest
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Dec 28, 2020 20:40
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Best Bi Geek Squid posted:I'm glad this guy is finally taking steps to improve his life Who said he felt it was an improvement? could have been for professional reasons and he hated the whole idea of it but has to kowtow to "the man" and the whole "Stop keeping a marble in your penis for safe keeping" trope 
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Dec 28, 2020 20:45
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quote:5 Inch Dildo Whereabouts of the 8 and 9 inch dildos is unknown.
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Dec 28, 2020 21:39
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SoylentCola posted:Whereabouts of the 8 and 9 inch dildos is unknown. Ohh I bet I know where those two dildos are. (Up the butt)
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Dec 28, 2020 21:42
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Maybe it was a 28 inch dildo and they had to cut it to get it out 
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Dec 28, 2020 21:44
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Why do men like to put things into their rectum?
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Dec 28, 2020 21:50
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Nirvikalpa posted:Why do men like to put things into their rectum? Por que no los dos?
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Dec 28, 2020 21:53
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Into The Mild posted:Por que no los dos? I mean most women who put things up their butt like dick but a lot of guys who do that don't.
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Dec 28, 2020 21:58
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Aren’t there lesbians who like to have stuff up their butt? People enjoy butt stuff
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Dec 28, 2020 22:00
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Nirvikalpa posted:I mean most women who put things up their butt like dick but a lot of guys who do that don't. One of the differences is that if you're a guy you've got a prostate, so even if the general idea of gay penetration doesn't turn you on, penetration still has a bonus. For gay men and women who simply enjoy the act of penetration "I like dick in general" would seem, relatively, statistically consistent, yes?
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Dec 28, 2020 22:06
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Nirvikalpa posted:I mean most women who put things up their butt like dick but a lot of guys who do that don't. because it is an erogenous zone on many humans regardless of their gender identity or sexual orientation Earwicker fucked around with this message at 22:22 on Dec 28, 2020 |
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Dec 28, 2020 22:19
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SoylentCola posted:Vagina I really want to know where the rest of the slinky is. Like, irrationally so.
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Dec 28, 2020 22:20
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https://forums.somethingawful.com/newreply.php?action=newreply&postid=511087470quote:The motivation of foreign rectal body insertion is mostly sexual stimulation. Patients are typically young and predominantly male, with a male to female ratio of 6:1.
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Dec 28, 2020 22:42
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SoylentCola posted:Whereabouts of the 8 and 9 inch dildos is unknown. A great prank is to put 5-, 6-, 7-, and 10-inch dildos in your rectum and then go to the hospital. The staff will spend ages looking for the 8- and 9-inch dildos!
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Dec 29, 2020 01:31
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Rascar Capac posted:A great prank is to put 5-, 6-, 7-, and 10-inch dildos in your rectum and then go to the hospital. The staff will spend ages looking for the 8- and 9-inch dildos! Number them 1 2 4 5 and 7
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Dec 29, 2020 02:42
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The us constitution has been up someone’s rear end surely
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Dec 29, 2020 02:43
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I think any president should have the constitution carried around in their rear end as a constant reminder of their duty
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Dec 29, 2020 02:45
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Sometimes I just wish I could roll GBS into a ball and stick it up my butt.
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Dec 29, 2020 03:09
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Call Your Grandma posted:Sometimes I just wish I could roll GBS into a ball and stick it up my butt. So do we. ...so. do. We.
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Dec 29, 2020 03:12
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What about that guy who stuck magnets up his nose for science? I don't think this list is completely accurate, what other things were stuck up people's holes that we aren't being told about?
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Dec 29, 2020 03:16
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SoylentCola posted:Whereabouts of the 8 and 9 inch dildos is unknown. Because seven ate nine 
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Dec 29, 2020 04:28
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SoylentCola posted:Rectum  Also I'm very curious how someone got honey stuck in their throat.
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Dec 29, 2020 05:30
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Knormal posted:
"Honey" is what they call their partner.
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Dec 29, 2020 06:51
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I got a guys cock caught in my rear end. Happened many times actually
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Dec 29, 2020 08:19
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:Because seven ate nine 
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Dec 29, 2020 08:55
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SoylentCola posted:“Was Intoxicated & Is Uncertain If She Used Her Anal Beads Or Not, Cant Find Them @ Home […] None Found In Er Exam” Turns out it's not always in the assed place you look.
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Dec 29, 2020 15:26
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im the tiny American flag stuck at the back of your throat.
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Dec 29, 2020 15:33
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 02:29 |
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Rascar Capac posted:A great prank is to put 5-, 6-, 7-, and 10-inch dildos in your rectum and then go to the hospital. The staff will spend ages looking for the 8- and 9-inch dildos! I can just imagine the kind of person who sticks 4 big dildos up his rear end, going to the hospital, and saying to the doctor “Yeah that’s it just a little deeper, maybe to the left..”
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Dec 29, 2020 16:11
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