- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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I know creating a sentient holodeck duplicate of Adolf Hitler was against regulations but how was I supposed to know he'd trick ensign Rudiger into providing him with a portable emiter and escape in a shuttlecraft?
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Jan 8, 2021 13:12
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 27, 2024 04:40
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- google THIS
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It's not so much that I got kicked out, it's that Wesley Crusher is still in
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Jan 8, 2021 16:06
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- titties
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They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra
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Yep, saved the whole ship a bunch of times and can't even get promoted past lieutenant, but roll a tribble in ketracel white and stuff it up your butt ONE TIME ...
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Jan 9, 2021 08:22
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- Drink-Mix Man
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You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.
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I went where no one had gone before, but very timidly.
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Jan 9, 2021 08:31
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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We take a tollerant approach to shapeshifters but transforming into the captain's chair and spinning around really fast when he sits down is conduct unbecoming of an officer.
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Jan 9, 2021 11:53
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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I have the opposite problem OP. Realized soon after my commission that Star Fleet is super boring and tried to get kicked out. But every time I do I'm told "That's the out of the box thinking we need in Star Fleet" and promote me.
So anyways I'm the Grand Admiral of the whole fleet now and don't know what else to do. I don't even like space.
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Jan 9, 2021 12:34
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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I sent that race who speak in allusions and references a bunch of memes and now they're annoying the captain something fierce.
Tyson, with his hands up
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Jan 9, 2021 15:40
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- mailorder bees
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FLUFFERNUTTER
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We take a tollerant approach to shapeshifters but transforming into the captain's chair and spinning around really fast when he sits down is conduct unbecoming of an officer.
thanks Manifisto!
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Jan 9, 2021 18:21
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- hey mom its 420
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THERE ... ARE ... 420 LIGHTS!!!!
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Jan 9, 2021 18:51
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Captain, we're getting a transmission. Visual and audio, sir. Source is unverified.
"Put it up on screen, Ensign."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=du-TY1GUFGk
"..."
Sir?
(to Riker) "What do you make of this, Number One?"
"...I have no idea."
(hold on Riker and Picard's faces as musical cue swells. Cut to intro)
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Jan 10, 2021 15:30
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- Stoner Sloth
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for playing jeff wayne's 'war of the worlds' every time those fuckers tried to lecture me about the prime directive
   
       
  
 
   
sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut, Heather Papps,Prof Crocodile, knuthgrush, Ohtori Akio, Teapot, Saosyhant, Dumb Sex Parrot, w4ddl3d33, and nesamdoom!! - ty friends!
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Jan 10, 2021 15:48
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- Filthy Hans
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by Fluffdaddy(and can't post for 10 years!)
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I was fired for retweeting a TRUE PATRIOT
https://twitter.com/realGulDukat/status/1347689701591949313
abolish Section 230 of the Starfleet Code!
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Jan 10, 2021 16:25
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- mailorder bees
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FLUFFERNUTTER
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thanks Manifisto!
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Jan 10, 2021 17:21
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Could not stop talking about jow "Star Citizen will do it better" during engineering team meetings.
Because it will you jerks!
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Jan 10, 2021 17:31
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Not kicked out, per se. But asked to resign after being told that my belonging to the Zero Nebula Death Cult and stated ambition to wipe sentient life from the universe makes me a "poor fit" for Star Fleet.
I am exploring all legal options.
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Jan 10, 2021 17:33
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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sold Starfleet a "supercomputer" that is really just a plexiglass box with some blinking lights and scraps of tubing
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Jan 10, 2021 18:55
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- mailorder bees
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FLUFFERNUTTER
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they caught me making GBS threads in the jeffries tubes
thanks Manifisto!
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Jan 10, 2021 19:10
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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Made friendship bracelets with the Captain and told her she's my bff but she found out I had a sleepover with Ensign Clara without telling her.
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Jan 10, 2021 19:27
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Look captain it was just an offhand comment. It's not my fault Data diverted half the ship's research complement to testing the structural integrity of his backside against 20th century currency
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Jan 11, 2021 08:34
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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sold Starfleet a "supercomputer" that is really just a plexiglass box with some blinking lights and scraps of tubing
That's my father! What have you done with him?
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Jan 11, 2021 14:28
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- Horrible Butts
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Q is real! Do your own research!
https://giant.gfycat.com/sillyremorsefuldipper.webm
Thank you Prof. Crocodile for the fun festive winter sig!
Arcane gob born of Khanstant's goblin gumball machine!
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Jan 13, 2021 17:48
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- Yinlock
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Performed the procedure to separate DickButt back into Lt. Dick and Mr. Butt, despite his right to continue living as an individual.
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Jan 14, 2021 10:56
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- Yinlock
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during a tense moment facing off against a deadly invisible alien predator, wondered aloud if the science officer's beeping tricorder was a "small penis detector"
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Jan 14, 2021 10:59
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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you rigged the domjot table... to let the nausicans WIN!?
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Jan 14, 2021 12:08
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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All I said was that the "bloody cardies can't be trusted" and now i have to take "sensitivity training". #RememberSetlikIII
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Jan 14, 2021 13:02
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Stuck my dick in the replicator. If materializing a mound of warm mashed potatoes around my business is wrong, I don't want to be right
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Jan 14, 2021 14:15
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Helping Comander Data update the firmware on his emotions chip to enable THC functionality while he smokes a fat doobie. So this is the thanks i get for helping a guy out?
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Jan 14, 2021 15:59
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- google THIS
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Refusing to wear my regulation red shirt during an away team mission for what are ultimately deemed "superstitious reasons"
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Jan 14, 2021 16:05
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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Great prank guys! Creating an elaborate Holodeck simulation of me getting discharged from service on "mental health grounds" for "advanced delusional paranoia". I'll give you a whupping as soon as I can figure out how to turn off the program... "computer, END PROGRAM NOW!!!!"
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Jan 14, 2021 17:50
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Refusing to wear my regulation red shirt during an away team mission for what are ultimately deemed "superstitious reasons"
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Jan 14, 2021 18:11
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 27, 2024 04:40
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- Yinlock
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oh sure the klingons get to bring fuckin swords onto the ship but I try to share my love of beekeeping ONE TIME
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Jan 14, 2021 18:25
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Jan 8, 2021 13:12
culturally insensitive 
