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Michael Corleone
Mar 30, 2011



Well, I ain't rich, but I get by, used to get $16 a month in FS's but with COVID they bumped it WAY up and I just found out. Obviously this is a blessing and I will use it right. What are some comedy answers or actual good advice though? I could buy a side of beef with that!

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ELI PORTER
Sep 16, 2007

I posted on Something Awful and all I got was this lousy t-shirt


1000 dollar hot dogs from your local major league baseball park

Good Sphere
Jun 16, 2018

Can't stop the Buddhabrot
But which way is it turning?
zn+1=zn2+c


Buy enough peanut butter to last the rest of your life. That stuff has a 2 year shelf life, but Iím sure it would last decades just fine.

Edit: also dried beans and honey has an indefinite shelf life.

LloydDobler
Oct 15, 2005

You shared it with a dick.



Buy a whole bunch of lobster and then take photos and troll the poo poo out of all the right wing sites and facebook groups you can find.

Halloween Liker
Oct 31, 2020



Michael Corleone posted:

Well, I ain't rich, but I get by, used to get $16 a month in FS's but with COVID they bumped it WAY up and I just found out. Obviously this is a blessing and I will use it right. What are some comedy answers or actual good advice though? I could buy a side of beef with that!

LOL

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.





Buy some food op

SPACE HOMOS
Jan 12, 2005



Go to a high end grocery and buy wagu beef, as much of it as you can.

When you're at the register, pull out your EBT card and wink at the cashier.

HAmbONE
May 11, 2004

I know where the XBox is!!

Smellrose

Vegetables, crisco, and cling wrap

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.


zaepg
Dec 25, 2008



Good Sphere posted:

Buy enough peanut butter to last the rest of your life. That stuff has a 2 year shelf life, but Iím sure it would last decades just fine.

Edit: also dried beans and honey has an indefinite shelf life.

Rice as well has a pretty much indefinite shelf life if stored properly. I'd image vinegar and soy sauce would last a really long time seeing theyre used to preserve foods.

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.





You donít have to use them all at once, just enjoy free groceries for a few months.

Wall Balls
Jun 3, 2007

Spanish Castle Magic



William Henry Hairytaint
Oct 29, 2011




This is always a good answer to food buying questions.

Halloween Liker
Oct 31, 2020



Some on rent and some on food

Michael Corleone
Mar 30, 2011



You don't have to spend it all at once and I guess it is close to $200 a month now, they give everyone the max amount for their household size now (1 ) Will use the 'free' food to help pay off my credit card before it goes into interest bearing days, then get a new one, all the free signup money and my credit score is over 800 now 'kiting' credit cards. Lets make this a poverty min/max thread or should/could the mods rename it?

Rad-daddio
Apr 25, 2017


Kick some my way. Grocery man got me by the short ones.

its all nice on rice
Nov 12, 2006

Sweet, Salty Goodness.



Buglord

Tuna steaks

Methanar
Sep 26, 2013
ASK ME ABOUT NOT TIPPING DELIVERY DRIVERS, OR ABOUT MY DIET OF CANNED BABY CORN AND CHICKEN NUGGETS

Launder it to cash and buy scratch lotto tickets to double your money

Saalkin
Jun 29, 2008

GREAT RACK



Surf and turf.

Be the welfare king of myth!

mallratcal
Sep 10, 2003




Can you buy gum with it? Buy gum.

Halloween Liker
Oct 31, 2020



Some guns and the change for some rock

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008


They gave us a $350 EBT to cover my sonís lunches over the summer which was ridiculous, but since every kid in our county gets free school lunch, every kid got the EBT without question. I should have bought 350 bucks worth of Elioís and cha cha chicken.

WILDTURKEY101
Mar 7, 2005

Look to your left. Look to your right. Only one of you is going to pass this course.

ShopRite has bags of 120 fish sticks for $9. I'll let you take care of the math but it's a lot of fish sticks

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

~*Suck My Balls*~

Fun Shoe

Take half and spend it on food to donate to a local food bank OP.

People are hungry right now OP.

WILDTURKEY101
Mar 7, 2005

Look to your left. Look to your right. Only one of you is going to pass this course.

Chinatown posted:

Take half and spend it on food to donate to a local food bank OP.

People are hungry right now OP.

it's not fun or funny but this is the right answer

Do it ironically
Jul 13, 2010


Sell it to others for $0.70 on the dollar and then buy some drugs

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004

Every idiot can count to one.


Meredith Baxter-Burnout
Jul 4, 2003

It's okay to watch child porn if you don't touch your dick, just raises awareness man.



Find your local discount grocery stores (Grocery Outlet and so forth) and feast like a king.

Also, donate some if you can.

nishi koichi
Feb 16, 2007

everyone feels that way and gives up.
that's how they get away with it.


half to the food bank, a quarter to stock up on non-perishables for covid, the rest, use as normal

Halloween Liker
Oct 31, 2020



Beans

Dont forget to bury some

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


Stock up on shrimp rings. Have company? Break out a shrimp ring. Dining alone? Whole shrimp ring to the face.

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




Ten of those costco jamons

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.





ClamdestineBoyster posted:

Stock up on shrimp rings. Have company? Break out a shrimp ring. Dining alone? Whole shrimp ring to the face.

They donít let you use it on shoes I donít think?

Halloween Liker
Oct 31, 2020



* some dude in nowhere USA*

Oh yeah this is real jamon

rotinaj
Sep 4, 2008






Fun Shoe

Be the guy from a math problem and buy a storeís entire inventory of oranges

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019


Trade it for crack and get loaded in a motel room with yr bestie

Hairy Right Hook
Sep 9, 2001

Hee to the ho


Hey man I'm a weeb but like you don't have to be one yourself to appreciate the fact that ramen noodles are like 50c a pack and have a pretty much unlimited shelf life, taste pretty good too!! I guarantee it!!


edit: Don't hesitate to DM me for dope rear end ramen packet recipes

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002




a vacuum sealer and a bunch of pork shoulder is the cheapest way to be well fed for a long while imo

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

pro hobo

Silent Majority
THE DON







take it to the life bank and get a loan motherbitch



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ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015


DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

They donít let you use it on shoes I donít think?

The shrimp rings are already cooked, you just pop the plastic lid off and eat them. I actually talked to a guy that works at the fake sushi grass factory and he says they have a way to cook the shrimp without shoes. Iím looking into it, sous vide is cool but very expensive.

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