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Rockman Reserve
Oct 2, 2007

"Carbons? Purge? What are you talking about?!"

yeah the news is reporting "compound fractures", like, more than one. he's out.

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AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993

https://www.cnn.com/us/live-news/tiger-woods-car-crash-california/index.html posted:

The airbags in the vehicle deployed, and Woods was wearing a seat belt. The sheriff said this likely saved his life. It appears that Woods' vehicle was "going at a relatively greater speed than normal," Villanueva said, adding that there were "no skid marks, no braking." The sheriff said there were no signs of impairment, but tests are being conducted.

:thunk:

Fallows
Jan 20, 2005

If he waits long enough he can use his accrued interest from his savings to bring his negative checking balance back into the black.

Rockman Reserve posted:

yeah the news is reporting "compound fractures", like, more than one. he's out.

thats when the bones are all in different directions

Lolie
Jun 4, 2010

AUSGBS Thread Mum

Fallows posted:

thats when the bones are all in different directions

It's also any fracture where the bone pierces the skin.

Propaganda Machine
Jan 2, 2005

Truthiness!
Just you wait, his bones will fuse into an even better golfing position than before!

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

Speeding, no skid marks, hit a curb and a sign, car rolled over multiple times shattering his ankle and breaking both his legs, and he was like "no big deal, yeah just help me out bro" when the sheriff found him. Yeah he was 100% loaded and fell asleep/passed out.

spaceblancmange
Apr 19, 2018

#essereFerrari


lol

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

Too bad. I guess his days of making millions of dollars and DPing beautiful women are over.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

Chief McHeath posted:

Speeding, no skid marks, hit a curb and a sign, car rolled over multiple times shattering his ankle and breaking both his legs, and he was like "no big deal, yeah just help me out bro" when the sheriff found him. Yeah he was 100% loaded and fell asleep/passed out.

Wonder what the par for that road was

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

Wonder what the par for that road was

+/- 0.5

John_A_Tallon
Nov 22, 2000

Oh my! Check out that mitre!

Propaganda Machine posted:

Yeah, going through this with a friend. He gets annoyed at drunk people but he himself drinks constantly because he thinks he's different and special and functional (no job, plays ff14 all day).

MMORPGs are the new opiate of the masses. Besides actual opioids.

Bape Culture
Sep 13, 2006

Can’t believe tiger woods is worth nearly a billion dollars and drives himself around in a dogshit piece of crap genesis suv thjng lol. I would be in the back of a phantom out of my mind on them xanniez

Do it ironically
Jul 13, 2010

by Pragmatica
It’s almost like it wasn’t his car

Hope he got the insurance

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here
Nap Ghost
Someone on another forum said 'it wasnt his car he was probably not used to the steering'

Yeah that's how it works with a normal driver and any rental or new car ever, uh oh not used to the steering, better floor it into the nearest wooded grove

rideANDxORdie
Jun 11, 2010

Supreme Allah posted:

Someone on another forum said 'it wasnt his car he was probably not used to the steering'

Yeah that's how it works with a normal driver and any rental or new car ever, uh oh not used to the steering, better floor it into the nearest tiger wooded grove

Fify

Klyith
Aug 3, 2007

GBS Pledge Week

Seeing the OP picture: "oh poo poo he went off an embankment cliff and nose-dived 50 feet or something..."



hmmmmmmm



Bape Culture posted:

Can’t believe tiger woods is worth nearly a billion dollars and drives himself around in a dogshit piece of crap genesis suv thjng lol.

"I will only play tournaments sponsored by cars with a 5-star crash safety rating!"

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here
Nap Ghost

Klyith posted:

Seeing the OP picture: "oh poo poo he went off an embankment cliff and nose-dived 50 feet or something..."



hmmmmmmm



When you consider the damage to the car and that they used the jaws of life to get him out, this wasn't just some random little skid, that vehicle went through some poo poo

I don't know this twitter but this is what's floating around atm

https://twitter.com/zachleft/status/1364315972857856004

Fallows
Jan 20, 2005

If he waits long enough he can use his accrued interest from his savings to bring his negative checking balance back into the black.
See from that picture its clearly the travel authorities fault for not installing rumble strips in all lanes to keep drivers awake during the hazardous hoursof 7am

Empty Sandwich
Apr 22, 2008

goatse mugs

slight hook on that drive

WILDTURKEY101
Mar 7, 2005

Look to your left. Look to your right. Only one of you is going to pass this course.
imagine being all hosed up, and then you unfuck yourself enough to win the loving Masters like 10 years past your prime

and then you gently caress yourself again

addiction is a bitch

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
dont do opiates kids

ninjoatse.cx
Apr 9, 2005

Fun Shoe
rear end in a top hat went into oncoming traffic. Hope it hurts like all get out. :mad:

Fame Douglas
Nov 20, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

Bape Culture posted:

Can’t believe tiger woods is worth nearly a billion dollars and drives himself around in a dogshit piece of crap genesis suv thjng lol. I would be in the back of a phantom out of my mind on them xanniez

Probably some sponsorship deal with Hyundai, I'd assume.

Klyith
Aug 3, 2007

GBS Pledge Week

lol in what world does that stretch of road have a "high frequency of accidents"?


oh right, LA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yoU39Rpp4FI

Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

Just lop them off and replace with spring steel so he can keep golfing

It’s natural to progress in golf from tiger woods to Jeremy irons

spaceblancmange
Apr 19, 2018

#essereFerrari

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJNfMqEK7VI

Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

Working on his handicap

AHH F/UGH
May 25, 2002

Honestly if I was a world class athlete with unlimited money and resources I wouldn't ever get married and have kids so all I can say is that he must have known he hosed up real bad

Wilt Chamberlain had the right idea

Yvershek
Nov 15, 2000

and there are no
diamonds in the
mine
Chance to show how the future of the human race involves tank treads.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

“Now watch this drive.”

~ Tigger Woots

Sjs00
Jun 29, 2013

Yeah Baby Yeah !
his dumbass should be only allowed to drive golf carts now

Dr Kool-AIDS
Mar 26, 2004

AHH F/UGH posted:

Honestly if I was a world class athlete with unlimited money and resources I wouldn't ever get married and have kids so all I can say is that he must have known he hosed up real bad

Wilt Chamberlain had the right idea

Yeah I've never understood it. Or I guess I get why people might want the companionship of a stable partner and to have kids, but at least find a spouse who knows what the deal is when you travel going in. If you're worth 100 million, I'm sure you can find someone who's pretty understanding about things!

Derpies
Mar 11, 2014

by sebmojo

Yeah that's a minimum "whoops nodded off*

Call Your Grandma
Jan 17, 2010

Sinteres posted:

Yeah I've never understood it. Or I guess I get why people might want the companionship of a stable partner and to have kids, but at least find a spouse who knows what the deal is when you travel going in. If you're worth 100 million, I'm sure you can find someone who's pretty understanding about things!

I would find a sorcerer to make a sexy golem out of $100 bills

Last Chance
Dec 31, 2004

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac9Z6CN14Gs&t=36s

Last Chance fucked around with this message at 05:50 on Feb 24, 2021

Tim Whatley
Mar 28, 2010

Turns out the best iron to get out of the rough is the jaws of life

John_A_Tallon
Nov 22, 2000

Oh my! Check out that mitre!

Tim Whatley posted:

Turns out the best iron to get out of the rough is the jaws of life

Oh snap!

Nightmare Cinema
Apr 4, 2020

no.
Wonder what his handicap is

Ultimate Mango
Jan 18, 2005

That’s some Thelma and Louise poo poo right there


Is there an ADA/wheelchair version of the Masters?

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Propaganda Machine
Jan 2, 2005

Truthiness!

Ultimate Mango posted:

Is there an ADA/wheelchair version of the Masters?

Maybe if the Special Olympics had Special K he'd show up.



but I think this is more a paralympic games sort of thing?

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