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biosterous






i'm not a computer toucher by trade but i'm the most tech-literate person who works there so it's me who ends up fixing things

today's play: microsoft access suddenly forgets how to do something

bios: hello access, please import this file and add it to the database

access: i don't see a file

bios: it's in the \imports\incoming\ folder, just like it always is

access: i don't see anything. i don't think that's a real folder

bios: you imported stuff from there last week

access: i know lol

bios: can you see \imports\archive\?

access: yup

bios: and everything else in the database is still there?

access: of course

bios: so how about importing the file?

access: there is no file and the folder doesn't exist lol

bios opens the vba and changes $dbpath & "\imports\incoming\" to [the entire filepath]

bios: can you see the file now

access: oh yes, there it is i see it!

bios: please import the file

access: the file doesn't exist and that path doesn't exist though

bios: you are a gently caress

access: yup lol


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

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biosterous






a previous adventure: express digital is a complete mystery

bios: hello express, it is time to do Annoying Tasks With Photos!

express: this is my purpose

bios: okay we have done the prep, please output them for Task 1

express: yeah okay done

bios: great! also where are the original pictures and data, where have you put them?

express: they're here in \filepath\that\doesn't\loving\exist

bios: ...

bios: that's not possible

express: that's where i put them

bios: that's not a filepath, i've looked and there's nothing like that

express: i'm looking at them right now, the pics and data!

bios: ... okay whatever, please do Task 2 with the pictures and data

express: the pictures and data don't exist so i'm outputting nothing

bios: the gently caress

express: i looked in the filepath and it doesn't exist, so i outputted nothing. i am a Good Program

bios: no


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

biosterous






express 2: digital worse

bios: i'm giving you administrator privileges, okay?

express: yeah rad

bios: okay please do task 1, please save the files somewhere that is real, please

express: okay, they're in \actual\real\filepath\

bios: oh excellent! great! task 2 please now?

express: okay, done, here are your things

bios: wow, i'm glad that worked. okay now let's grab something off the network

express: the network doesn't exist though

bios: ... even though you could access it fine before you had elevated permissions

express: yep!

bios: okay how about a mapped network drive, let's do things that way instead

express: no such drive lol

bios: the mapped network drive you were working with before

express: yeah! i know the one, it is not real

bios: you are very inconsiderate


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

biosterous






boss: hi bios please come in and fix things everything is broken

bios: can you be more specific maybe

boss: things aren't working and they should be

bios: ... ok


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

biosterous






printer: no

bios: please

printer: don't wanna

bios: what if i restart the print spooler

printer: gently caress yes i love printing yessss

boss: please teach me how to do this so i can promptly forget


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

biosterous






boss: hi bios we can't connect to the database all of a sudden

bios: did you install $program, despite me saying you shouldn't

boss: yup

bios: oh


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

biosterous






bios: hi express, it is time for task three

express: i'm good at that

bios: please do the Thing, and then output all the images as 4x6 jpgs

express: i can't

bios: why

express: i'm waiting for the raster printer to be on

bios: the 4x6 raster printer is on

express: i want the 5x7 raster printer. i can't print a 4x6 with the 4x6 printer. give me the 5x7 printer please

bios: ... ok


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

biosterous






boss: hi bios, i used the find & replace function on one of the spreadsheets but i don't actually know what i'm doing and now it's all wrong

bios: yup

boss: please fix it

bios: yup

boss: also i will keep doing this

bios: yup


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

nut


my dad: jesus gently caress christ rear end fuckin piece of poo poo apple locked me out of email i can't get loving email

me: you didn't click it

my dad: oh

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/BowedParallelAcouchi-mobile.mp4
god bles manifisto for the springtime signature

biosterous






express: hi, templates 2 and 3 no longer list things correctly

bios: why

express: haha

bios: is there any substantial difference between template 1 and templates 2 and 3

express: not really, just some cosmetic changes. the backend stuff is identical

bios: can i change templates 2 and 3 to work, please

express: nah


https://giant.gfycat.com/PaltryAcclaimedElectriceel.webm
thank you manifisto for this sig!!!

vaporslug by deep dish peat moss

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Slumpy




me colon i am using speech to text to post and i find it very thirfty backspace find word thrifty replace with nifty end end. end. post. submit reply. submit reply.


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