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double negative
Jul 7, 2003




longing for the days of condom depot and dynamic fastener

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CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man




Claude Patrick was a good fighter who got tased and disappeared

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013




if i were a dentist, i would definitely advertise in a sport where people's teeth get knocked out. genius work.

Brut
Aug 21, 2007

Герой Советского Союза



I like the Venum ones a bit better than the Reebok stuff, but we'll see how it looks in an actual event. I think what I mostly care about is fit, I hate seeing fighters constantly tug at their shorts or whatever because the clothes suck.

Also yeah, kinda wild seeing the 135 champ, 145 title contender about to do TUF, and then Kay Hansen, 1-1 UFC fighter with no fight lined up due to injury, heh.

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"


venum could be forgiven for finding any active fighter to model the clothes due to a pandemic, but its not like they just rolled up to ATT and grabbed the first 3 people they found

aljo is strong island, ortega is cali, and kay hansen's training location is unknowable by all

Brut
Aug 21, 2007

Герой Советского Союза



That's an LA roof top and Hansen trains in California.

Ringo Roadagain
Mar 27, 2010



Iím sorry khabib but he needs to fight someone first

The Automator
Jan 16, 2009


double negative posted:

longing for the days of condom depot and dynamic fastener

I think I said as much in this thread, but my last time in Vegas I actually saw a dynamic fastener store and I was so loving excited about it

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007



RIP the random cumsplatter designs of reebok

Brut
Aug 21, 2007

Герой Советского Союза



Hahahahahaha wait a minute does Bryce Mitchell get forced to wear non-camo shorts again?

edit:

lmfao he's already on it

https://twitter.com/ThugnastyMMA/status/1378064664995708933

Nis
Feb 21, 2011



https://twitter.com/ParadigmSports/status/1379539409679175680?s=20

glad wonderboy finally has a fight

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
ASK ME ABOUT MY SELF-PUBLISHED WARHAMMER FANFICTION AND MY KNIFE COLLECTION



hopefully zabit has just been on a treadmill for the last year to fix his lovely cardio.

Brut
Aug 21, 2007

Герой Советского Союза



Snowman_McK posted:

hopefully zabit has just been on a treadmill for the last year to fix his lovely cardio.

He's been literally running from fights!

Actually Yair pulled out of their fight last year

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
ASK ME ABOUT MY SELF-PUBLISHED WARHAMMER FANFICTION AND MY KNIFE COLLECTION


Brut posted:

He's been literally running from fights!

Actually Yair pulled out of their fight last year

The joke still works and I'm proud of you.

When Zabit's good, he's so loving cool to watch. Then he gets tired and needs to take a nap. Featherweight seems like a very bad division to have this trait.

Southpaugh
May 26, 2007

Smokey Bacon




He just needs to spend more points in cardio. He's already loaded with Dagestani Zen points.

punk rebel ecks
Dec 11, 2010

We dance for socialism!


Ngannou's story is amazing!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86HuzpiU2tY

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

There are no men like me. There's only me.






Godamn. Burns just going up against a killer after a loss.

Pingiivi
Mar 26, 2010

Straight into the iris!


GSP was on GQ:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cW0WwNZioCo

Nis
Feb 21, 2011




his hair is vaguely disturbing to me

Ad by Khad
Jul 25, 2007

SomethingAwful's Official Karen





Boco_T posted:

Claude Patrick, Dr. Marty Frankel Downtown Dental


its not like the ufc itself is any better

gotnoxplode dot com

Cyber Dog
Feb 22, 2008




huge facial hair mistake

TheTofuShop
Aug 28, 2009



They booked maycee barber vs miranda maverick, thats a pretty solid matchup with upside for both of em

Southpaugh
May 26, 2007

Smokey Bacon




Cyber Dog posted:

huge facial hair mistake

I think GSPs complete lack of style makes him the dynamic force we all know and love.

FishBowlRobot
Mar 21, 2006





My dadís had a mustache pretty much my entire life (35 years). The one or two times he shaved it, it was just too weird. But at least he didnít go from bald and clean shaven, to sprouting weird baby hair and a Jersey guido beard.

beep by grandpa
May 5, 2004



I enjoy mid-life crisis GSP

Brut
Aug 21, 2007

Герой Советского Союза



beep by grandpa posted:

I enjoy mid-life crisis GSP

iirc it's for a role or like his manager told him to change his hair to better audition for roles, something like that, it's somewhere in this interview:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=791L1eGpMpU

edit: skimmed through the transcript, it's right after 35 minutes.

Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013




It's an unusual look on him after having seen him clean shaven for his entire career, but it does suit him removed from that context, honestly.

Macksy
Oct 20, 2008


"GSP we need you to grow your hair out for a role where a morbidly obese Steven Segal kicks your rear end while sitting down."

artism
Nov 22, 2011



GSP looks like an uncool mark gonzales.

Looking forward to watching Holland embarrass himself this weekend

CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man




Disclaimer for gamblers Ė I am not a gambler. I talk about odds, but I use them as a talking point. When I highlight an underdog Iím not endorsing any kind of bet. Rather, Iím asserting that a fight looks more competitive to me than the betting line suggests. Youíre responsible for your own decisions.

BREAKDOWN for UFC on ABC: Vettori vs Holland


Digital Jedi posted:

Should be noted that since the card is on ABC it is an early start time

Early Prelims 11:00 CST/12:00 EST
Prelims: 11:30 CST/12:30 EST
Main Card: 2:00 CST/3:00 EST



Hey hereís the card



Hey and weíre back with a fight card after an Easter break. Lots of fights on this one!

Main Card (ABC/ESPN+)
Main Event
Middleweight Marvin Vettori (-285) vs Kevin Holland (+294)
Holland fought Derek Brunson three weeks ago (in fact he ties the record for shortest amount of time between UFC main events) so Iím going to just quote my last one: Holland was one of 2020ís fighters of the year, going a record-tying 5-0 from May-December. The low point of that run was a split decision win over Darren Stewart (razor thin), but the high point was a crazy KO of Jacare that saw Holland scoring while on his back (ďI had a dream about thisĒ). His other wins were against mediocre competition not worth mentioning.

Brunson totally outclassed Holland, who was spending more time in the cage clowning around than actually fighting and scoring points. But heís cleared to fight and jumping in as a late replacement for injured Darren Till, willing to face another top contender.

Marvin Vettori definitely made his way to the top tier of the Middleweight division by fighting through the B-side of the bracket. Heís an Italian kickboxer with some good skills. We last saw him in December scoring a one-sided UD against the uber-tough grappler Jack Hermansson. Noteworthy is that Vettori took current champion Israel Adesanya to a split decision a few fights back, and both* of them have been perfect since then (*at middleweight.) He has a four-fight streak going.

Iíd say that on paper Vettori is the better fighter, but if he lets Holland get the mind games going, this fight might become closer than it ought to be.

Featherweight Arnold Allen (+128) vs Sodiq Yussuf (-137)
Now this is the real main event. Allen is probably the best active fighter out of Britain right now. Heís a skinny skillful English kickboxer who has some grappling chops too, 7-0 in the UFC with wins over Nik Lentz, Giblert, and Amirkhani. Heís not active as he could be because nobody wants to loving fight him. If you check out his social media, heís always begging for fights but canít get them. So why is he the underdog? Well his opponent is good too. Sodiq Yussuf is a Contender Series product who is 4-0 in the UFC. Last time out Yussuf took a UD from Andre Fili, with a KO of hard-headed Gabe Benitez before that. He has looked explosive and accurate in his fights so far.

Middleweight Sam Alvey (+169) vs Julian Marquez (-186)
Iím just going to do a copy-and-paste job for Alvey I still remember a little bit when Alvey was worth tuning in for. At one point he was an absolute finishing machine, including a 3 fight streak of first-round KOs. Anyway now heís on a 4 fight skid with lots of lovely awful to watch fights and split decisions. He seems to have power late in his career, but he doesnít pull the trigger anymore on his offense That fight was a fuckign draw against Da Un Jung, though to his credit Alvey showed his power a few times in that fight and pulled the trigger. But that means he hasnít won since a split decision over Gian Villante in 2018. Oh poo poo this is middleweight, which is where Alvey has scored most of his KOs! Thatís a data point. In February, Julian ďThe Cuban Missile CrisisĒ Marquez took a really sweet anaconda choke win over Maki Pitolo. His other UFC fights are a split decision loss to Di Chirico and a guillotine of Darren Stewart, plus a DWCS KO of surging Phil Hawes. Heís a big lunking dumb caveman who wings haymakers and cranks at peopleís necks. Might be a good opponent to draw a good fight out of Alvey.

Strawweight Nina Ansaroff (-130) vs Mackenzie Dern (+133)
Mom fight! Mom fight! Mom fight! Nina Ansaroff returns from pregnancy to face BJJ ace Mackenzie Dern. Dern is a jiu jitsu specialist who has developed a bit of a competent striking game. The last time out she had a really competitive decision win against the underrated Virna Jandiroba, bringing her streak to 3 on a 5-1 UFC record. Ansaroff is basically a well-rounded journeywoman. Sheís 4-3 in the UFC, with only one finish, but she has wins over Angela Hill and Claudia Gadelha, and her last loss was to Tatiana Suarez. This fight has a gigantic skill gap in jiu jitsu, but also a pretty big striking skill gap in the other direction.

Welterweight Mike Perry (+140) vs Daniel Rodriguez (-152)
How does Perry still have a job? Oh right heís a big lunk who gets in stupid brawls when heís not shouting racial slurs and beating up randos in bars. Thereís not too much to know about him. His last fight was a decision loss to Tim Means (where he missed weight) and a decision win over Mickey Gall before that. Rodriguez is a Contender Series product who is 13-1 overall. In his UFC debut he submitted Tim Means and then in August he KOed Dwight Grant. In his last fight he lost a decision to Nicolas Dalby. Heís a hard puncher, and Platinum is there to be hit.


Prelims (ESPN+)
Tons of prelims so Iíll be brief on these
Lightweight Jim Miller (+210) vs Joe Solecki (-277)
If you donít know Jim Miller loving look him up yourself, and introduce yourself to the thread as a new person. We actually like new people. He lost a competitive decision to Vinc Pichel in August. Joe Soleki is a DWCS alum who has a decision over Matt Wiman and a submission of Austin Hubbard.

Lightweight Scott Holtzman (+206) vs Mateus Gamrot (-215)
Holtzman is an action fighter who is tougher than his reputation. His last time out he was finished for the first time in his career when Beneil Dariush caught him with a backfist. Gamrut is a KSW product from Poland who lost his debut by split decision to Guram Kutateladze. His record suggests heís a grappler, and he has some b-league wins over named opponents.

Bantamweight Erin Blanchfield (+221) vs Norma Dumont Viana (-249)
Blanchfield is an Invicta product making her debut in the UFC, bringing a 5-1 record. She has a win over Kay Hansen, who is now 1-1 in the UFC. Iíve definitely seen her fight but I canít remember any details, but she has some stoppages. Dumont made her UFC debut as a 4-0 fighter getting thrown to Megan Anderson and getting KOed. She took a decision from veteran Ashlee Evans-Smith after that.

Lightweight John Makdessi (+170) vs Ignacio Bahamondes (-186)
Makdessi is a goofy looking Canadian veteran with a karate base and some KOs via spinniní poo poo. He lost a decision to Trinaldo in March 2020, snapping a 3-fight winning streak. Bahamondes is a Chilean young prospect with a 10-3 record. He won by front kick on DWCS in November.

Heavyweight Yorgan de Castro (-275) vs Jaris Danho (+263)
De Castro is a loving trashweight as gently caress. He lost to Greg Hardy and then had a really embarrassing loss to someone else. His last two fights loving sucked. Danho 5-1-1 fighting under the Assyrian flag. Interestingly he has fought twice in the UFC, in 2016: a majority draw and an extremely rare technical majority decision (3rd round groin strike). He was booked to fight Greg Hardy once, so this fight is probably going to be poo poo, but perhaps something weird will happen.

Bantamweight Hunter Azure (+150) vs Jack Shore (-150)
Hunter Azure is a northern plains fighter from Montana. Heís a wrestler with a win over Brad Katona, but a big KO loss to Brian Kelleher. Last time out he won a decision over Cole Smith. Shore is an undefeated Welsh fighter and former Cage Warriors champion. Heís 2-0 in the UFC and I remember him looking impressive. He has 3 consecutive wins by RNC.

Featherweight Luis Saldana (-128) vs Jordan Griffin (+124)
Griffin is a DWCS product who has lost his sparkle, now at 18-8 and uh, 1-3 in the UFC. Heís a big long rangy guy with long arm chokes. Saldana is a DWCS product making his debut. Heís 14-6 overall.

Light Heavyweight Da Un Jung (-137) vs William Knight (+123)
Jung is a Korean who went to a draw with Sam Alvey, bringing him to 2-0-1 UFC. He didnít look like a terrible fighter in that fight, but he still drew with Sam Alvey. He likes to throw big punches. William Knight for UFC 260 I wrote In September I wrote Knight is an 8-1 contender series prospect making his big show debut, and all of his fights have ended in stoppage. He won that fight by UD and I donít remember it. Thinking about it, Knightís last fight might have been one where he looked really good and terrifying for a round then stopped attacking.

Welterweight Ima Kasanganay (-274) vs Sasha Palatnikov (+246)
Kasaganay is the guy who got highlight kicked but Joaquin Buckley. He was undefeated til then, coming from DWCS. Palatnikov is the at guy who fights under the Hong Kong flag who was brought in as a last-minute uber underdog replacement to fight a major DWCS product and then survived an early rush to beat the guy and take his 0 in a killer-rear end FOTN performance. Heís a good striker and extremely durable. This is a good curtain jerker, if just for Palatnikov, who Iím interested in seeing fight again. Iím surprised by the odds: the guy Palatnikov beat last time out struck me as a better fighter than Kasanganay.

There it is. The snack rating is a McDouble Ė itís whatís available and the price is right.

CommonShore fucked around with this message at 03:33 on Apr 8, 2021

Digital Jedi
May 28, 2007

Wow....that feels good






Fallen Rib

Should be noted that since the card is on ABC it is an early start time

Early Prelims 12:00PM EST/11:00AM CST/9:00AM PST
Prelims: 12:30PM EST/11:30AM CST/9:30AM PST
Main Card: 3:00PM EST/2:00PM CST/12:00PM PST

Digital Jedi fucked around with this message at 03:37 on Apr 8, 2021

CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man




Digital Jedi posted:

Should be noted that since the card is on ABC it is an early start time

Early Prelims 11:00 CST/12:00 EST
Prelims: 11:30 CST/12:30 EST
Main Card: 2:00 CST/3:00 EST

thanks! I missed that.

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"


Jimothy Miller's bonus resume

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alLcL1Evsy0

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

He is I, and I am him



Lol re Warrior:
"I love Tom Hardy and uh uh uh ... yeah, it's a great movie!"

Collapsing Farts
Jun 29, 2018

√į¬ü¬í¬Ä

double negative posted:

honestly not very surprising, especially now. i am however surprised that steve-o is still alive

Not only is Steve-O alive, he's basically more successful than ever with a youtube channel with 5 million subs and his own podcast

double negative
Jul 7, 2003




on the topic of late career renaissance podcasts, i went to watch mike tyson's podcast with post-championship ngannou, only to sadly learn it was co-hosted by brendan schaub

Mekchu
Apr 10, 2012



double negative posted:

on the topic of late career renaissance podcasts, i went to watch mike tyson's podcast with post-championship ngannou, only to sadly learn it was co-hosted by brendan schaub


That's a horrifying thought.

Brut
Aug 21, 2007

Герой Советского Союза



https://www.bjpenn.com/mma-news/ufc...y-human-beings/

lmao check out this weird article about this dude, he's probably never getting a UFC belt but he seems alright.

punk rebel ecks
Dec 11, 2010

We dance for socialism!


Collapsing Farts posted:

Not only is Steve-O alive, he's basically more successful than ever with a youtube channel with 5 million subs and his own podcast

His channel is pretty good, complete with some Jackass quality antics.

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The Automator
Jan 16, 2009


Brut posted:

https://www.bjpenn.com/mma-news/ufc...y-human-beings/

lmao check out this weird article about this dude, he's probably never getting a UFC belt but he seems alright.

Oh man, I forgot all about Elias theodorou

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