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GlyphGryph
Jun 23, 2013


People keep trying to tell me about them, and my ability to comprehend what they are saying is basically nil. It feels like I'm listening to a crazy person talk, except then you get a couple of them together and then it feels like I am the crazy person, because it is obvious they have an understanding of reality that is consistent between them but is in no way representative of reality as I understand it.

Someone please explain this to me in a way I can understand, because my current understanding of the technology is "... so it's like beanie babies except instead of stuffed animals its collectible URLs?" and that can't be right because nothing they say makes any sense that I can figure if that's the case.

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TengenNewsEditor
Apr 2, 2004
H.I.M. Emperor Lyndon B. Johnson I

GlyphGryph posted:

People keep trying to tell me about them, and my ability to comprehend what they are saying is basically nil. It feels like I'm listening to a crazy person talk, except then you get a couple of them together and then it feels like I am the crazy person, because it is obvious they have an understanding of reality that is consistent between them but is in no way representative of reality as I understand it.

"... so it's like beanie babies except instead of stuffed animals its collectible URLs?"

that's right

GlyphGryph posted:

and that can't be right because nothing they say makes any sense that I can figure if that's the case.

right again, it's all bullshit

PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan




It's a digital sticky note. Inside is some JSON that describes the thing you bought and a URL to where you can look at it.



If the image or video or whatever at the included link ever goes away, your NFT points to nothing at all. I guess you could replace it with something else at that URL and goatse a guy who bought grumpy cat.

NFTs can not be traded between different "exchanges"

They're as dumb as you think so they're definitely worth tens f thousands of dollars. Personally if I was an artist I would make a shitload of them to re-sell garbage I made 20 years ago to people who don't understand what they're buying.

https://mashable.com/article/what-is-an-nft-non-fungible-token/

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003
WANTING A VACCINE DOES NOT MAKE SOMEONE AN ANTIVAXXER, DUMBASS

Cybernetic Crumb

"I must be misunderstanding it because it cannot possibly be that dumb" is a normal reaction to understanding it correctly.

PT6A
Jan 5, 2006

ASK ME WHY THE HYUNDAI KONA IS THE GREATEST CAR ON GOD'S EARTH, I HAVE STRONG OPINIONS ON THIS SUBJECT


Yeah, exactly. Everyone's like "I can't possibly be understanding this right, because it sounds like completely nonsensical bullshit." No, that's exactly what it is, you understand it perfectly, and it's every bit as stupid as it sounds.

Thuryl
Mar 14, 2007

My postillion has been struck by lightning.


It's virtual baseball cards, except instead of having a picture of the baseball player on the cards, it has directions to a billboard that may or may not still be standing and may or may not still have a picture of that baseball player on it.

CoolCab
Apr 17, 2005

OH WOW! Have I shoehorned my INCREDIBLY BORING story about how I met James Corden at the Greggs at Chievely services on the M4 into this thread yet? Of course I have because that's LITERALLY the most interesting thing about me.

PLEASE TELL ME (and James Corden) TO EAT SHIT


while crypto is often dumb in a bunch of simultaneous ways nfts in particular seem closer to a fad than a bubble. like, imagine if you could issue certificates of authenticity for anything digital and would you like to buy this certificate for a comical amount of money?

GlyphGryph
Jun 23, 2013


PokeJoe posted:

It's a digital sticky note.

Hmm. This makes it sound like it's not so much a beanie baby, it's the certificate of authenticity that comes with the beanie baby, and people are just trading/selling the certificates themselves instead of the thing they're attached to?

PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan




Yeah that's pretty much correct. You don't get any real ownership of the work. You cant start selling prints of art you bought the NFT for since the creative work still belongs to the artist. You can just sell the NFT itself.

Foxfire_
Nov 8, 2010



GlyphGryph posted:

Hmm. This makes it sound like it's not so much a beanie baby, it's the certificate of authenticity that comes with the beanie baby, and people are just trading/selling the certificates themselves instead of the thing they're attached to?

It's not even a certificate of authenticity, it's not inherently associated with the manufacturer or anything

- You have a beanie baby on a shelf in your house
- I write "GlyphGryph has a beanie baby in his house. It's a green rabbit and pretty cool." on a sticky note. Only one person can be physically holding that particular sticky note at a time. Nothing stops me or anyone else from making another one, it'll just be a different piece of paper
- I sell the sticky note to an idiot and write "'Foxfire sold this to X' on the bottom" when I give it to them.

It's that, but the sticky note is digital instead of physical. I don't need to have any relationship with you and you don't have any obligation to keep the beanie baby on that shelf.


e: also, we light a few barrels of oil on fire to celebrate each transaction
e2: the beanie baby also doesn't ever need to actually exist, I can just write a lie on the sticky note

Foxfire_ fucked around with this message at 18:55 on Apr 2, 2021

Tiggum
Oct 23, 2007


You know that scam where they sell land on the moon? So you send them some money and they send you a certificate that says you own a piece of the moon? So you can put that certificate up in your house and tell people you own a piece of the moon, but really all you own is a certificate?

Now imagine that, instead of the moon, it's a picture of the moon. And instead of a certificate, it's a digital certificate that you can't even show people. But because it sounds extremely technical and complicated, when you say "I own an NFT of the moon" people tend to just assume that means something because it couldn't possibly be as stupid as it sounds and these things seem to be worth a lot of money so there must be something to them and maybe I'm the dumb one for not getting it? No. You're not the dumb one. There's nothing to get. It's a worthless digital certificate of pretend ownership for a picture on someone else's computer that they still have complete control over and responsibility for.

Liquid Communism
Mar 9, 2004


Out here, everything hurts.




This is evergreen:




https://www.vice.com/en/article/pkdj79/peoples-expensive-nfts-keep-vanishing-this-is-why

quote:

When you buy an NFT for potentially as much as an actual house, in most cases you're not purchasing an artwork or even an image file. Instead, you are buying a little bit of code that references a piece of media located somewhere else on the internet. This is where the problems begin.

Ed Clements is a community manager for OpenSea who fields these kinds of problems daily. In an interview, he explained that digital artworks themselves are not immutably registered “on the blockchain” when a purchase is made. When you buy an artwork, rather, you’re “minting” a new cryptographic signature that, when decoded, points to an image hosted elsewhere. This could be a regular website, or it might be the InterPlanetary File System, a large peer-to-peer file storage system.

Clements distinguished between the NFT artwork (the image) and the NFT, which is the little cryptographic signature that actually gets logged.

"I use the analogy of OpenSea and similar platforms acting like windows into a gallery where your NFT is hanging,” he said. “The platform can close the window whenever they want, but the NFT still exists and it is up to each platform to decide whether or not they want to close their window.”

An nft is basically a TinyURL referrer to an image hosted somewhere. If the host takes the image down, you're SOL.

Liquid Communism fucked around with this message at 06:18 on Apr 3, 2021

bigperm
Jul 10, 2001
some obscure reference

https://twitter.com/ChuckTingle/status/1375839284700217344

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External Organs
Mar 3, 2006

A cheerful person, he is known as the king of vulgarities (cursing?)


Pounded In The Butt By The Idea of Digital "Ownership" But Actually Not Even Owning Anything

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