bradzilla posted:

The human brain actually kinda sucks rear end. It's programmed to be as lazy as loving possible and needs a minute of sleep for every 2 minutes awake lmao. Not to mention insanely easy addiction and rampant mental problems.

EorayMel posted:

There was a post in GBS long long ago, like years ago, talking about how horses are nature's groverhaus including how they can't support more than one baby per pregnancy and how their hooves sometimes fall completely through their legs like the penis of an old statue exposed to years of acid rain and it was pretty hosed up

The Management posted:

Armpits. They smell worse than the rest of you for some reason and sweat a lot.

YeahTubaMike posted:

Was that the "poor Freckles, thought of ants and died" post? That was a good post.

Nefarious 2.0 posted:

I'd like to learn more about elizabeth shue's body. what a fox!

Sucrose posted:

to be fair I think that's our fault. Wild horses are hardy little beasts. Horses now only routinely gently caress up their legs just running because we've hosed with them so much to make them faster and big enough to ride.

DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

I dunno titties are pretty great

EorayMel posted:

There was a post in GBS long long ago, like years ago, talking about how horses are nature's groverhaus including how they can't support more than one baby per pregnancy and how their hooves sometimes fall completely through their legs like the penis of an old statue exposed to years of acid rain and it was pretty hosed up

The Management posted:

Need to go for a run? Maybe escape a lion or just an evening jog? I hope you’ve got those tits or floppy dong wrapped up so they don’t shear off from the bouncing.

Xenocides posted:

Sugar glider. You can jump, glide, perch on virtually everything and your back feet have combs for grooming unlike filthy humans.

IronClaymore posted:

So yeah, it's like, super easy to be almost immune to cancer. But somehow that's bad for fertility, so overall it's bad. Whales have it, that's why they have so many more cells than us but never get cancer. It's also why they have trouble getting pregnant and need to have massive ejaculations.

Maybe super good DNA repair is bad for us in some hypothetical ancestral environment the keto guys are always going on about, actually pretty good now when we have far too many people, and lots of people with cancer, and my thirsty throat just can't get enough cum.

Ventral EggSac posted:

I would definitely take the no cancer + huge ejaculate bargain, hot drat

IronClaymore posted:

Apparently, it takes some 100k ATP molecules to fix a double-strand-break in DNA. Big whoop. That's nothing. You even get a crumb of proper fried food and that's your day's worth of DNA calories done and sorted.

Stupid human bodies have not caught up at all with modern lifestyles.

Play posted:

Humans have essentially stopped evolving in the traditional sense. So little actual pressure on survival, and whether or not you pass on your genetics is more about personal choice and social situation than having successful genes. There are still changes happening but they aren't really "evolution" as the world's animals and plants have it

Ventral EggSac posted:

My toenails help me grip the floor

Play posted:

Our skin is weak as gently caress. Can't take cold, can't take heat. Can't take sustained direct sunlight (for some, anyways). Constantly dying and shedding its gross dead parts all over everything. Completely permeable, substances can literally just phase through it right into your bloodstream. Really soft and easily torn. I could go on.

Can't a guy get a motherfucking exoskeleton around here instead of this weak rear end tissue paper bullshit? Come the gently caress on

Genesplicer posted:

We might be loaded with all kinds of problems, but I like the idea that we are amazingly tough compared to some aliens, and they don't know how to deal with us.

https://humans-are-space-orcs.tumblr.com/

https://space-australians.tumblr.com/

Telsa Cola posted:

Theres a book series explicitly about this and also that our screaming murder monkey brains cause the evil psionic squid aliens to go catatonic if they try to gently caress with us.

IronClaymore posted:

Apparently, it takes some 100k ATP molecules to fix a double-strand-break in DNA. Big whoop. That's nothing. You even get a crumb of proper fried food and that's your day's worth of DNA calories done and sorted.

Stupid human bodies have not caught up at all with modern lifestyles.

zedprime posted:

Don't tempt the body, pooping out your mouth is real and happens.

Pennywise the Frown posted:

I was an EMT and once I was in a hospital and a guy was dying/dead and we all smelled something just horrible and he had feces coming out of his mouth by some sort of GI leak. It took me like 3 days to stop smelling that with every breath.

Telsa Cola posted:

One of the OG human hunting methods was literally jogging after antelope for so long that they keeled over and died or collapsed from exhaustion and over heating.

Humans have scary endurance and heat exchange abilities.

This still gets done by some groups in Africa.

its all nice on rice posted:

What's with all these different types of blood??

Pennywise the Frown posted:

I was an EMT and once I was in a hospital and a guy was dying/dead and we all smelled something just horrible and he had feces coming out of his mouth by some sort of GI leak. It took me like 3 days to stop smelling that with every breath.

zedprime posted:

How much ejaculate are we talking about here? Everybody gets excited about big huge cums but somebody has to clean that up.

Spinz posted:

Yep the worst death of a Christian Scientist I know about was like this. At first she just spat constantly into a Kleenex I didn't know why she would fill waste paper baskets daily with just the used wads. She was skinny and had no appetite and couldn't have been older than 45 maybe. Her stomach started to visibly swell until after only like a week she looked 6 months pregnant. I didn't see her anymore but then we started to get incredibly odorous laundry. The first time I checked it out it took me a second to realized what I was looking at; this must be the coffee grounds vomit I've heard of that's supposed to be some kind of danger sign. I had them surreptitiously throw away all the laundry that came from that room. It was a tie for the worst smelling stuff I've ever smelled in my life.

She stopped eating completely and a few more weeks went by.

I heard later it took her about 8 hours to die in the shower stall in her room. She was choking to death on her own feces. My guess is untreated bowel cancer maybe? They ended up ripping up the carpet which wasn't really stained to get that room to not reek of foul poo poo and horror.

Play posted:

Humans have essentially stopped evolving in the traditional sense. So little actual pressure on survival, and whether or not you pass on your genetics is more about personal choice and social situation than having successful genes. There are still changes happening but they aren't really "evolution" as the world's animals and plants have it

Revins posted:

I remember this story and it haunts me. If it wasn't you someone told of something very similar on an emt thread

Sucrose posted:

I wonder if she just had some sort of bowel blockage or issue that could have been completely treated if she wasn't a lunatic.

IronClaymore posted:

I refuse to google it. But if you are interested, I'm sure there's videos of whales getting it on. I have heard anecdotal accounts of the volumes involved, and it is vast.

But whales are mammals so anyone who's too interested in that is a loving furry. Which is fine actually. Just...informed consent you know. Just leaves more human cum for the rest of us.

quote:

The reported average penis length varies but is usually mentioned to have an average length of 2.4 to 3.0 metres (7 ft 10 in to 9 ft 10 in). The most common reported average length is roughly 2.4 metres (7.9 ft) but the average diameter is only 30 to 36 centimetres (12 to 14 in), making the penis proportionately very long and thin.[citation needed] However, its girth has also been reported to be nearer 46 centimetres (18 in), with a single ejaculation estimated to be about 35 US pints (17 l; 29 imp pt), based on the size of its testes each weighing 45 to 68 kilograms (99 to 150 lb).

Pennywise the Frown posted:

Do you have any source on this because I just assumed every living thing is constantly evolving. I though humans haven't really been around nearly long enough to see any evolution.

Pennywise the Frown posted:

Do you have any source on this because I just assumed every living thing is constantly evolving. I thought humans haven't really been around nearly long enough to see any evolution.

Zil posted:

Play posted:

Evolution only works due to pressure on survival and reproduction. The organisms who successfully survive and reproduce pass down their genes while those who don't, don't. This causes incremental change over time as the successful genes are passed down while the unsuccessful ones aren't.

Meanwhile, in the modern world, that has almost ceased to have any meaning. The vast majority of people survive, and whether you pass down your genes has less to do with how well you survive or how fertile you are and more to do with other unrelated factors. Therefore there are still changes happening but they are increasingly disconnected from actual traits that actually help the species survive.

Humans already would've evolved more slowly than most creatures due to the amount of time it takes us to sexually mature and therefore the wide time differences between generations, but now it goes further than that because survival has little to do with your genes anymore. I don't really have a source, sorry, just my understanding of how evolution works.